September 17th,
It's been pretty quiet the last little while. Unfortunately for members of the Joe team, quiet does not mean free. If anything, there is more work to do when COBRA is lying low than when they are shooting mortars through our front door.
It might surprise some of you to learn that COBRA is not always on the offensive. There are long periods in which there is little if any overt activity on the enemy front. That is not to say the Snakes aren't sitting in wait, eagerly planning their next move. On the contrary.much time and effort is spend on gathering and analyzing information so that we can be ready for.and in some cases prevent.a strike.
On top of that, there is the everyday work that keeps this outfit running. Maintaining old equipment, training on new equipment, upkeep of the base itself, keeping yourself in top form and of course, keeping up with the mounds of paperwork that inevitably find their way to your inbox.
So although I haven't seen any action since I last wrote, I certainly have been anything but idle. First there was the weekly maintenance check of the choppers, then the monthly inventory of our weapons stockpile. I went off base for three days to renew my pilots qualifications and when I returned was immediately ushered into a 24 hour meeting marathon with Hawk and the other Joe leaders.discussing everything from budget to tactics, the mess menu to new recruits.
All of this while trying to keep up with a cruel physical training schedule and make a dent in the rather imposing pile of unfinished business sitting on my desk in the office I share with Duke.
Is it any wonder that I value every second of my time off?
I managed to grab a moment to myself yesterday, and as usual I made my way up to the surface to spend some time with my pride and joy.
My car.
She is a beauty. A red Shelby COBRA 427 convertible, complete with racing stripes, fully restored to her former glory with some extras added on for good measure. A Ford V-8 shoved into a British roadster, when it was released in the 1960s, the machine just blew away every other car on the road. 0-100 in only 14 seconds..top speed of 165 mph.and that straight off the dealers lot!
Only 356 of these were ever built, and I own one of them. I actually bought it when I was still a teenager, a little while after passing my drivers exam. It was an absolute wreck, a rusted out shell that I was able to get for a little more than 1000 dollars.
When my father saw it he laughed. My mother just shook her head. It didn't even have a set of wheels much less a working engine.I had brought it home on a flatbed I borrowed from the garage I was working for at the time. Oh yeah.I worked the pumps for a little while, all the Faireborn boys were expected to go out there and pay their dues the minute they reached their teens. No idle boys allowed around the Colonel!
I loved working at old man Walker's garage. He taught me everything I know about cars and engines.and instilled in me a love of the vintage automobile that is still going strong to this day. Driving, tweaking, repairing, restoring.you name it.a nice masculine pursuit that certainly defused my father's tension at my choice of degree and school.
It took me years, and I think I dropped every dime I earned into her, but eventually she was made roadworthy. Then, when I returned from England and joined the army, the increased income allowed me to gradually finish her off, seeking out original parts whenever I could find them, until she became the beauty she is today.
The envy of collectors.
351 Ford Windsor 400 HP engine, Holley 4 barrel carb, and a 4 speed gear box on the inside.on the outside a chrome roll bar, Haibrand racing wheels, split chromed bumpers, and the coup de grace.chromed side pipes. Just last year somebody offered to take her off my hands for a cool quarter million. I refused.she is mine. I just couldn't part with her.it would be like parting with a piece of myself!
I have tuned her until she practically purrs.continually adding to her already impressive power and performance. They say that a man's car is just an extension of his favored organ.I will not dispute this.nor, I think, will Allie. Not now, at least.but when I first met her and bragged about it she certainly dragged me down a notch quickly enough.
"You know what they say about guys with great sports cars?" I smirked as she glared at me from across the motor pool. She was busy trying to change a tire on one of the Jeeps. Unsuccessfully I might add.
She knew.knows.absolutely nothing about cars, although admittedly she is learning. She sits with me now while I work on my baby, quietly reading a book or writing in her journal as I fiddle with the engine. I do enjoy her company, and try to teach her a bit of what I know regardless of the fact that she doesn't retain any of it. She still insists on calling my car a Mustang, which it most certainly is not! It's a Shelby American. I have lost count of how many times I have corrected her, so much so that I think she just does it to tease me.
Anyhow, back to the flashback. I had asked her if she knew about the thing with guys and their cars.
"And what's that, Flint? Is it a substitute for an obvious deficiency in other areas?" She didn't look up.
"No, it is a reflection of his prowess in bed."
"You mean fast?" She quipped.
Steeler, who had been sitting quietly on a tank erupted into laughter.
"Man Flint, only three months on the team and you've already been shot down by two of its women. You're on a roll."
"Two?" Lady Jaye looked up from her work and I could have sworn I saw a flash of jealousy in her eyes.
"Oh yeah.Courtney chased him out of here with a tire iron last week."
"Really?" Jaye just looked at me, the expression on her face saying all to clearly.'male chauvinist pig.'
"It was a wrench.and I am not giving up on our resident beauty queen just yet.she just needs a little time to think about it."
"Is that all you ever think about.women and cars?" Jaye growled.
"What else is there? " She sighed as shook her head and went back to her work, ignoring me for the rest of the afternoon.
Poor Allie. I was an absolute jerk towards her. She really saw the worst side of me back then. Well.not the worst.that came much, much later on a mission that I would rather forget.
Mind you, she wasn't much of an innocent herself. There were times that she put me in my place.and hard. No mercy, no quarter.like the Porsche incident, for example. I don't think I will ever live the humiliation down. Not that I didn't deserve it. On the contrary, I was fully responsible for sparking the whole damn situation. As usual though, Jaye took it to the nth degree.
I was joking with her about woman and cars.and how the two are like oil and water. I think I mentioned that she would never be able to handle my roadster, and if she was ever going to go looking for a car of her own she should probably stick to something small and Japanese.like a civic.or maybe a Toyota of some sort.
Heavy Metal, who had been sitting with her and going over the subtle nuances of the MOBAT, shrunk down the turret as Lady Jaye swung around and let loose. Oh man, was she fuming. She tended to get a lot of flack for her reckless driving from the other Joes.she is a bit of a maniac behind the wheel. Of course, I didn't let up.her high and mightiness had been getting on my nerves all day and I was itching for a fight. After all, that was the day Courtney shot me down once and for all, and my leg was still killing me from the whack I took with the damn wrench.
So what did I do? I gestured towards the tank and mentioned that maybe it would be best if she stayed away from the heavy equipment.
"Isn't that right Sherm? I mean, you certainly are no Cover Girl!" Well.that did it. She froze in place and just eyed me from where she stood. I am certain that had she been any closer she would have belted me.
"No.I'm not," She hissed, "I would have aimed the wrench slightly higher."
And with that she stormed off.dragging a stunned tank jockey behind her.
At that point I didn't know her very well at all, otherwise I would have realized the battle was far from over. I would have known that something was coming.that the wheels were turning even as she left the motor pool. Instead, I tried to banish her from my thoughts and continue along my jolly way. Then, exactly a month later when I had completely forgotten the whole incident, she unleashed her masterpiece.
Revenge, they say, is a dish best served cold.
It was a cool and sunny Saturday morning and I had just finished washing my car when I saw her approaching. She looked over the vehicle, running her hands along the side as she circled it, before coming to a stop in front of me.
"You know I have never actually seen you drive this thing. Does it actually move or do you simply push it in and out of the motor pool?"
"Oh it moves." I laughed, "Don't you worry about that."
"I was beginning to think it was just a flashy accessory. What did you tell me the other day? It makes up for obvious deficiencies in other areas?" She smirked, her eyes sparkling in amusement.
"You know what I said.you want to take ME out for a spin and find out the truth?" I grinned evilly and waited for her 'inner harridan' to emerge, but I was disappointed. She ignored my remark and continued.
"I would love to see whether or not you are all talk and no action."
"Hey.I just offered." I was rewarded with a narrowing of the eyes but she regained her composure quickly enough. I should have been forewarned.
"I was thinking more along the lines of a race."
I spit up my coffee in surprise "A race?! You're kidding"
"You.me.high noon today on the airstrip"
I laughed.
"So dramatic! You can't be serious, you don't even own a car and besides."
"I own a car."
".and besides" I continued, chuckling into my mug, "you'll lose. I wouldn't want you holding a grudge after I show you up."
"You afraid to race a woman, Flint?"
"No.I'll be there. But don't say I didn't warn you." I leaned into the car and flashed her my award winning smile "and to show you I am a such a good sport, I will even give you a head start."
So there I was, sitting at the wheel of my Cobra all cocky and confident, waiting for her to show up. Word of the event had gotten round and the entire team had shown up to watch, as well as some soldiers from the regular force stationed at Wadsworth.
I looked good.the car looked good.I was going to blow poor Jaye right out of the water.
At least that's what I thought.
"Ummm.Flint?" Bazooka approached me as I sat with my engine idling at the makeshift start line. "Jaye said to tell me you still have time to pull out and save face."
"Tell her royal highness that I will see her at the finish line. Where is she anyhow?"
"She ready, but she is starting from further back. Said she didn't need a head start to out drive a.ummm.something in Gaelic.man like you."
"Fine, if that's the way she wants it.she'd better get ready to eat some dust along with her words. Cue the start."
Cover Girl sauntered out into the middle of the runway to the hoots and whistles of the peanut gallery standing around us. She raised the flag with one hand, while with the other giving Clutch the finger.and then dropped it and I was off in a surge of power.
I tell you.my car is a powerhouse!
Unfortunately, in this case it was not powerful enough.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, this black Porsche 911 pulls up next to me and slows to match my speed. The top was down and as I looked over, my face fixed in what must have been an expression of complete and total shock, Lady Jaye winked, mock saluted, and then proceeded to match my every move.
She stayed there for a while, flying around the turns at dangerously high speeds. I was pushing my car to the limits.my skills to the limits.trying to beat out the piece of expensive German engineering that was glued to my left side.neck and neck. I could feel the car fighting me.the centrifugal force on the turn trying to rip control from my hands. I was taking risks I wouldn't normally take.crazy moves that could very well end up damaging my car.myself..yet as I turned my head to check my mirrors she was still with me.matching every move.
Then, in a flash so quick that I hardly know what hit me, she just took off in a vapor trail of smoke and dust. Damn woman had been holding back.taunting me!
I met her at the finish line as she was getting out of her car.
"What were you saying about my driving skills, Flint? Hmmmm?" she purred, "You know what they say about women and their sports cars."
She smiled that maddeningly smug little smile that she used when she knew she had you by the balls. The Joes around us broke out in hearty laughter.
It was humiliating. I was furious.but at the same time reluctantly impressed. Sure the car practically drove itself, nevertheless it took some skill and a lot of guts to take a curve like we just did.to run so close and at such high speeds, where one wrong move would send you spiraling to a very painful end. She had earned my grudging respect, but I didn't tell her until months later. Instead I stomped off into the night, my tail between my legs.
We went for a drive in that very car this evening.mine being up on the lift. I hadn't had time to finish it before she managed to distract me into a little illicit tickle fight that threatened to get quite intense. Good thing Cross Country and Cover Girl started whistling and jeering, for we had forgotten for a moment where we were.
The rain had cleared up.so we took the top down and she let me take the wheel, even though she knows I have yet to let her touch mine. I don't know why that is.and upon close examination I realize I am being ludicrous. I am sure Psyche Out would have a field day analyzing this one.
I still can't believe she went out and bought a car like that on a whim. Incredible! I had heard at the time that she came from money, but I hadn't realized until that moment just how much.
Even AFTER getting cut off from the Hart family fortune, she still had enough to drop what must have been at least a hundred grand on a car without so much as batting an eye.
But that is a whole other story and I am struggling to keep my eyes open. I need sleep in a big way! I have early morning drills with Beachhead at 05:00 then I have to get packed and ready for my latest assignment.
I better get Jaye up as well. I know it's late and she is out like a light, but she needs to go on duty in about an hour. First, though.I need to mentally prepare myself.
.She is one crabby female when she is woken up!
It's been pretty quiet the last little while. Unfortunately for members of the Joe team, quiet does not mean free. If anything, there is more work to do when COBRA is lying low than when they are shooting mortars through our front door.
It might surprise some of you to learn that COBRA is not always on the offensive. There are long periods in which there is little if any overt activity on the enemy front. That is not to say the Snakes aren't sitting in wait, eagerly planning their next move. On the contrary.much time and effort is spend on gathering and analyzing information so that we can be ready for.and in some cases prevent.a strike.
On top of that, there is the everyday work that keeps this outfit running. Maintaining old equipment, training on new equipment, upkeep of the base itself, keeping yourself in top form and of course, keeping up with the mounds of paperwork that inevitably find their way to your inbox.
So although I haven't seen any action since I last wrote, I certainly have been anything but idle. First there was the weekly maintenance check of the choppers, then the monthly inventory of our weapons stockpile. I went off base for three days to renew my pilots qualifications and when I returned was immediately ushered into a 24 hour meeting marathon with Hawk and the other Joe leaders.discussing everything from budget to tactics, the mess menu to new recruits.
All of this while trying to keep up with a cruel physical training schedule and make a dent in the rather imposing pile of unfinished business sitting on my desk in the office I share with Duke.
Is it any wonder that I value every second of my time off?
I managed to grab a moment to myself yesterday, and as usual I made my way up to the surface to spend some time with my pride and joy.
My car.
She is a beauty. A red Shelby COBRA 427 convertible, complete with racing stripes, fully restored to her former glory with some extras added on for good measure. A Ford V-8 shoved into a British roadster, when it was released in the 1960s, the machine just blew away every other car on the road. 0-100 in only 14 seconds..top speed of 165 mph.and that straight off the dealers lot!
Only 356 of these were ever built, and I own one of them. I actually bought it when I was still a teenager, a little while after passing my drivers exam. It was an absolute wreck, a rusted out shell that I was able to get for a little more than 1000 dollars.
When my father saw it he laughed. My mother just shook her head. It didn't even have a set of wheels much less a working engine.I had brought it home on a flatbed I borrowed from the garage I was working for at the time. Oh yeah.I worked the pumps for a little while, all the Faireborn boys were expected to go out there and pay their dues the minute they reached their teens. No idle boys allowed around the Colonel!
I loved working at old man Walker's garage. He taught me everything I know about cars and engines.and instilled in me a love of the vintage automobile that is still going strong to this day. Driving, tweaking, repairing, restoring.you name it.a nice masculine pursuit that certainly defused my father's tension at my choice of degree and school.
It took me years, and I think I dropped every dime I earned into her, but eventually she was made roadworthy. Then, when I returned from England and joined the army, the increased income allowed me to gradually finish her off, seeking out original parts whenever I could find them, until she became the beauty she is today.
The envy of collectors.
351 Ford Windsor 400 HP engine, Holley 4 barrel carb, and a 4 speed gear box on the inside.on the outside a chrome roll bar, Haibrand racing wheels, split chromed bumpers, and the coup de grace.chromed side pipes. Just last year somebody offered to take her off my hands for a cool quarter million. I refused.she is mine. I just couldn't part with her.it would be like parting with a piece of myself!
I have tuned her until she practically purrs.continually adding to her already impressive power and performance. They say that a man's car is just an extension of his favored organ.I will not dispute this.nor, I think, will Allie. Not now, at least.but when I first met her and bragged about it she certainly dragged me down a notch quickly enough.
"You know what they say about guys with great sports cars?" I smirked as she glared at me from across the motor pool. She was busy trying to change a tire on one of the Jeeps. Unsuccessfully I might add.
She knew.knows.absolutely nothing about cars, although admittedly she is learning. She sits with me now while I work on my baby, quietly reading a book or writing in her journal as I fiddle with the engine. I do enjoy her company, and try to teach her a bit of what I know regardless of the fact that she doesn't retain any of it. She still insists on calling my car a Mustang, which it most certainly is not! It's a Shelby American. I have lost count of how many times I have corrected her, so much so that I think she just does it to tease me.
Anyhow, back to the flashback. I had asked her if she knew about the thing with guys and their cars.
"And what's that, Flint? Is it a substitute for an obvious deficiency in other areas?" She didn't look up.
"No, it is a reflection of his prowess in bed."
"You mean fast?" She quipped.
Steeler, who had been sitting quietly on a tank erupted into laughter.
"Man Flint, only three months on the team and you've already been shot down by two of its women. You're on a roll."
"Two?" Lady Jaye looked up from her work and I could have sworn I saw a flash of jealousy in her eyes.
"Oh yeah.Courtney chased him out of here with a tire iron last week."
"Really?" Jaye just looked at me, the expression on her face saying all to clearly.'male chauvinist pig.'
"It was a wrench.and I am not giving up on our resident beauty queen just yet.she just needs a little time to think about it."
"Is that all you ever think about.women and cars?" Jaye growled.
"What else is there? " She sighed as shook her head and went back to her work, ignoring me for the rest of the afternoon.
Poor Allie. I was an absolute jerk towards her. She really saw the worst side of me back then. Well.not the worst.that came much, much later on a mission that I would rather forget.
Mind you, she wasn't much of an innocent herself. There were times that she put me in my place.and hard. No mercy, no quarter.like the Porsche incident, for example. I don't think I will ever live the humiliation down. Not that I didn't deserve it. On the contrary, I was fully responsible for sparking the whole damn situation. As usual though, Jaye took it to the nth degree.
I was joking with her about woman and cars.and how the two are like oil and water. I think I mentioned that she would never be able to handle my roadster, and if she was ever going to go looking for a car of her own she should probably stick to something small and Japanese.like a civic.or maybe a Toyota of some sort.
Heavy Metal, who had been sitting with her and going over the subtle nuances of the MOBAT, shrunk down the turret as Lady Jaye swung around and let loose. Oh man, was she fuming. She tended to get a lot of flack for her reckless driving from the other Joes.she is a bit of a maniac behind the wheel. Of course, I didn't let up.her high and mightiness had been getting on my nerves all day and I was itching for a fight. After all, that was the day Courtney shot me down once and for all, and my leg was still killing me from the whack I took with the damn wrench.
So what did I do? I gestured towards the tank and mentioned that maybe it would be best if she stayed away from the heavy equipment.
"Isn't that right Sherm? I mean, you certainly are no Cover Girl!" Well.that did it. She froze in place and just eyed me from where she stood. I am certain that had she been any closer she would have belted me.
"No.I'm not," She hissed, "I would have aimed the wrench slightly higher."
And with that she stormed off.dragging a stunned tank jockey behind her.
At that point I didn't know her very well at all, otherwise I would have realized the battle was far from over. I would have known that something was coming.that the wheels were turning even as she left the motor pool. Instead, I tried to banish her from my thoughts and continue along my jolly way. Then, exactly a month later when I had completely forgotten the whole incident, she unleashed her masterpiece.
Revenge, they say, is a dish best served cold.
It was a cool and sunny Saturday morning and I had just finished washing my car when I saw her approaching. She looked over the vehicle, running her hands along the side as she circled it, before coming to a stop in front of me.
"You know I have never actually seen you drive this thing. Does it actually move or do you simply push it in and out of the motor pool?"
"Oh it moves." I laughed, "Don't you worry about that."
"I was beginning to think it was just a flashy accessory. What did you tell me the other day? It makes up for obvious deficiencies in other areas?" She smirked, her eyes sparkling in amusement.
"You know what I said.you want to take ME out for a spin and find out the truth?" I grinned evilly and waited for her 'inner harridan' to emerge, but I was disappointed. She ignored my remark and continued.
"I would love to see whether or not you are all talk and no action."
"Hey.I just offered." I was rewarded with a narrowing of the eyes but she regained her composure quickly enough. I should have been forewarned.
"I was thinking more along the lines of a race."
I spit up my coffee in surprise "A race?! You're kidding"
"You.me.high noon today on the airstrip"
I laughed.
"So dramatic! You can't be serious, you don't even own a car and besides."
"I own a car."
".and besides" I continued, chuckling into my mug, "you'll lose. I wouldn't want you holding a grudge after I show you up."
"You afraid to race a woman, Flint?"
"No.I'll be there. But don't say I didn't warn you." I leaned into the car and flashed her my award winning smile "and to show you I am a such a good sport, I will even give you a head start."
So there I was, sitting at the wheel of my Cobra all cocky and confident, waiting for her to show up. Word of the event had gotten round and the entire team had shown up to watch, as well as some soldiers from the regular force stationed at Wadsworth.
I looked good.the car looked good.I was going to blow poor Jaye right out of the water.
At least that's what I thought.
"Ummm.Flint?" Bazooka approached me as I sat with my engine idling at the makeshift start line. "Jaye said to tell me you still have time to pull out and save face."
"Tell her royal highness that I will see her at the finish line. Where is she anyhow?"
"She ready, but she is starting from further back. Said she didn't need a head start to out drive a.ummm.something in Gaelic.man like you."
"Fine, if that's the way she wants it.she'd better get ready to eat some dust along with her words. Cue the start."
Cover Girl sauntered out into the middle of the runway to the hoots and whistles of the peanut gallery standing around us. She raised the flag with one hand, while with the other giving Clutch the finger.and then dropped it and I was off in a surge of power.
I tell you.my car is a powerhouse!
Unfortunately, in this case it was not powerful enough.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, this black Porsche 911 pulls up next to me and slows to match my speed. The top was down and as I looked over, my face fixed in what must have been an expression of complete and total shock, Lady Jaye winked, mock saluted, and then proceeded to match my every move.
She stayed there for a while, flying around the turns at dangerously high speeds. I was pushing my car to the limits.my skills to the limits.trying to beat out the piece of expensive German engineering that was glued to my left side.neck and neck. I could feel the car fighting me.the centrifugal force on the turn trying to rip control from my hands. I was taking risks I wouldn't normally take.crazy moves that could very well end up damaging my car.myself..yet as I turned my head to check my mirrors she was still with me.matching every move.
Then, in a flash so quick that I hardly know what hit me, she just took off in a vapor trail of smoke and dust. Damn woman had been holding back.taunting me!
I met her at the finish line as she was getting out of her car.
"What were you saying about my driving skills, Flint? Hmmmm?" she purred, "You know what they say about women and their sports cars."
She smiled that maddeningly smug little smile that she used when she knew she had you by the balls. The Joes around us broke out in hearty laughter.
It was humiliating. I was furious.but at the same time reluctantly impressed. Sure the car practically drove itself, nevertheless it took some skill and a lot of guts to take a curve like we just did.to run so close and at such high speeds, where one wrong move would send you spiraling to a very painful end. She had earned my grudging respect, but I didn't tell her until months later. Instead I stomped off into the night, my tail between my legs.
We went for a drive in that very car this evening.mine being up on the lift. I hadn't had time to finish it before she managed to distract me into a little illicit tickle fight that threatened to get quite intense. Good thing Cross Country and Cover Girl started whistling and jeering, for we had forgotten for a moment where we were.
The rain had cleared up.so we took the top down and she let me take the wheel, even though she knows I have yet to let her touch mine. I don't know why that is.and upon close examination I realize I am being ludicrous. I am sure Psyche Out would have a field day analyzing this one.
I still can't believe she went out and bought a car like that on a whim. Incredible! I had heard at the time that she came from money, but I hadn't realized until that moment just how much.
Even AFTER getting cut off from the Hart family fortune, she still had enough to drop what must have been at least a hundred grand on a car without so much as batting an eye.
But that is a whole other story and I am struggling to keep my eyes open. I need sleep in a big way! I have early morning drills with Beachhead at 05:00 then I have to get packed and ready for my latest assignment.
I better get Jaye up as well. I know it's late and she is out like a light, but she needs to go on duty in about an hour. First, though.I need to mentally prepare myself.
.She is one crabby female when she is woken up!