Disclaimer – I really wish I did, but no…I don't own the world of Valdemar :) That all belongs to Mercedes Lackey. However! All those oh-so-interesting characters that have never made an appearance in any of her novels from my chapters (Lyrissa, Piel, Mikel, Jesin, you know who)… they belong to me ^_^ Of course, you're welcome to use my characters… provided you tell me ;) Since this is my first fanfic, any questions/comments can be sent to dazz1eu@yahoo.com and would be greatly appreciated ^_^ Just don't be too harsh, neh? ;)

~ Chapter 9 ~

            She was alone again.

            Except the Herald had left something behind.

            Raising her head, Lyrissa stared at the sword, still in its sheath, leaning against her.  Of all things, why leave a sword?

            Freeing her arms from their tight grip around her legs, she reached out, cautiously, gripping the sheath with both hands.

            Her hands were slightly numb since her grip had cut off some of the circulation.  Still, she had enough control to study the sword abstractly.  One hand slid up the sheath to finger the hilt.  Then, with a shrug, Lyrissa tugged the sword free.

~~ ^ ~~

            Talia walked back into the patient room where Mikel was lying on a bed.  Hearing her footsteps, he turned his head and smiled weakly.

            "You know," he said jokingly, "I seem to have a growing fondness for the Healer's Collegium.  Maybe I should switch uniforms."

            "Switching uniforms wouldn't keep you out of the bed," replied Talia with a smile, "But I'm going to assume you're at least feeling better?"

            Mikel nodded slightly with a wince.  "The Healer told me it was a magical attack, though he seemed puzzled.  Evidently, whatever it was, it left traces of the Healing Gift as well as the usual traces of magery."

            Talia blinked.  "Ah…" she responded, uncertain of what to think of the news.  While the Healer's Collegium had been doing rather well in picking up the new methods on how to treat wounds inflicted by magic, Talia had her doubts about the analysis passed by the Healer who had attended Mikel.  True, while it was easy enough to identify the energies that had caused the problem, the traces of Healing perhaps could be attributed to Mikel's previous visit to the Healers.

            To Talia's knowledge, you just simply could not throw the Healing Gift around like a levin bolt.

            "So," Mikel's voice interrupted Talia's musings.  "Did you find her?"

            Hesitantly, she nodded.  "I did, but… she wasn't responding to me."

            He grimaced.  "Well, I suppose that's to be expected but –"

            "However," Talia continued, eyes slightly unfocused as she stared at the far wall.  "I didn't abandon her.  I left Need with her."

            Silence.  Then Mikel coughed.  "I beg your pardon, Herald Talia, but what exactly can a sword do?"

~~ ^ ~~

            She was in a field, the green grass lush despite the strange weather patterns of late.  The sheep were happily grazing, eager to glut themselves on such rich fare.

            ::A memory…::

            Humming to herself, she idly carded wool, keeping an eye out for any stray sheep that might wander off to far.  After all, it was easier to keep a careful eye out then to fetch a sheep that had blundered its way into a ditch.

            ::Why am I…?::

            "Rissa, come look at the flowers!"

            The voice came from the right, the speaker hidden due to the dips of the field.

            "Not now Jinny, I have to watch the flock, you know that!"  The response was light hearted and full of love.

            ::No…::

            "But the flock never goes anywhere," whined the voice.

            "Only because I'm careful, sister dear," she called back.

            A pause.

            "Rissa, look, it's a funny circle here!"

            ::Go look…::

            "Jinny, I thought I said-"

            "And there's a cute furry thingy here too!  A rabbit!  Can we keep it Rissa?"

            ::Run away…::

            "Jinny, please, don't touch any animals.  You know Aunt wouldn't like it."

            Silence.  A scream.

            "Jinny?  Jinny?!"

            The sound of feet running.

            "It hurts Rissa…it bit me…"

            ::The bleeding…::

            "Don't worry Jinny, just you hold on, I'm going to carry you back to the Keep, ok?"

            "Sleepy…" The voice was getting softer.

            "Jinny, don't you dare fall asleep on me.  Jinny?"

            :: Couldn't save… ::

            "It's so pretty, Rissa…"

            "The flowers are pretty, I know, I'll pick lots for you, ok?  Just hold on."

            A pause.

            "Jinny?"

            Silence

            "JINNY!!"

            :: My fault… ::

            She let darkness claim her, the memory spinning away.

            She cried, hands covering her face, broken.

            Footsteps.

            Lyrissa looked up.

            An old woman with the looks of a fighter.  Her attire consisted of strange garments, but Lyrissa's attention was caught, not by the clothing, but by the woman's black eyes.

            Stern, but kind.

            "Why do you run, child?" she spoke in a gravelly, matter-of-fact voice.

            "I…" Lyrissa bowed her head.  So it had come to Judgement.

            "I ask, why do you run?"  The tone was more pressing now.

            "She – my sister.  Died because of me.  Because my Gift… I found out too late.  Too slow.  If I had only –"

            "What if's, child.  We are always thinking of those, but they are not our future."

            Lyrissa shook her head.  "No, NO!  I Healed her only after she had died.  Why?  Why?!  If I had only known before that I could…"  She wanted to weep.

            "You were triggered, child, because of the trauma.  We do not control the Gifts."

            "But I –"

            "What of your sister now?" the old woman interrupted.

            Lyrissa's head jerked up.  "What?"

            The woman reached down and touched her forehead.  "Look."

            The darkness flared, brightened.  Lyrissa shielded her eyes.

            And when the brightness faded enough for her to see, she was in a new field, full of flowers.

            And in the middle, Jinny was dancing.

            "Jinny!" Lyrissa wanted to run forward, but couldn't move.  One arm outstretched, still kneeling, she watched the dancing figure.

            Jinny stopped and turned.  She smiled.  "Silly Rissa, what are you doing?"

            "Jinny…"

            She skipped over, just out of reach.  "You're not the same Rissa anymore.  You're cold, you're silent.  I don't know you."  She pouted, just a little.  "Where's the Rissa who I loved?"

            Lyrissa said nothing.  How could she be happy when she had death staining her hands?

            "It's beautiful here," Jinny smiled, twirling.  Then she stopped and bent down, looking her in the eye.  "But you have your own beauty to tend.  Your own field to nurture and grow."  She waved her hand.  "I have a field now too, Rissa.  You won't let yours fall apart, will you?  You wouldn't let everything die, would you?"

            Slowly, ever so slowly, Lyrissa shook her head, the word die ringing through her head like a bell.  ::To live… to help others…to do more because of what happened?::

            "Lyrissa."

            Lyrissa looked over her shoulder.  It was the old woman, the darkness behind her as if in a different world.

            "Why do you run, child?"

            It was the first question that the old woman had asked, but now, Lyrissa had a different answer.  Standing slowly, she glanced back towards the middle of the field, where Jinny was now chasing after a butterfly.

            Turning her back on the field, Lyrissa smiled wanly, a glimmer of her old self.  The guilt was still there, but no longer as overpowering.  With the death of the old came the birth of the new, the guilt giving way to an urge.  A will to help those in need, to Heal the pain and the trauma that was certain to find its way into other people's lives.  To live, because she still lived, and to bring hope and life to others.  To live… because there were those who wanted her to live.  The answer was simple.

            "There is no reason to run."

~~ ^ ~~

            The two Healer Trainees stood on either side of the hallway outside Herald Mikel's patient room.  They had been standing there even as Talia had went inside, though they had not said a word as she passed, only looked up pleadingly.  At Talia's gentle shake of her head, their faces had fallen and since then neither had spoken a weird.

            Perhaps it was the guilt that held them captive in its powerful grip.  Perhaps it was the lack of response over such a costly admission.  Few enjoy admitting they are wrong.  Fewer still come forward to apologize.

            Footsteps from further down the hallway caused Alie to raise her head to bleakly eye the new arrival.  Bleakness turned to surprise and she uttered a small gasp of shock.

            The gasp prompted Piel to look up.  It was then his turn to stare.

~~ ^ ~~

            "Excuse me," said a voice from the door.  Soft, but lyrical.

            Talia turned to glance over her shoulder at the dark brown haired girl standing by the door.  The blue eyes looked surprisingly familiar, and yet…

            Mikel peeked around Talia, unable to see the visitor until he made the effort to crane his head.  His eyes widened with surprise.  "Lyrissa?!"

            And indeed, the girl certainly looked liked Lyrissa.  Yet, there was a subtle difference.  This Lyrissa seemed more genuine, more open.  The face, so carefully blank, was full of life.  The mouth, usually bordering on a frown, was now turned upward and smiling slightly, showing teeth.  Her eyes sparkled, filled with a relaxed emotion that neither Herald could recall seeing there before.

            Mikel simply stared while Talia smiled.

            "Herald Talia?  I think this is yours."  Lyrissa carefully held up a sword with both hands, half drawn from its sheath.  "I'm not too sure what happened, but… I think I'll be alright now."  Depositing the sword into Talia's hands, she did a small half-curtsy, looking dignified even in the slightly shabby patient's robe.

            Talia accepted the sword, nodding.  "Well, you certainly seem brighter.  All your ghosts put to rest?"

            A shadow crossed over Lyrissa's face for a split second.  "Perhaps… not all."  And then the shadow was gone.  "But," and now she smiled, tilting her head slightly as if sharing some private joke.  "I have my own field to tend to, to nurture and grow."

            A whisper of noise from the window caused all to turn and meet the deep sapphire gaze of a white horse.  Seeing it, Lyrissa smiled and shook her head.

            Walking over to the window, she pushed it open, looking down at the Companion with a contemplative gaze.  Grasping its head lightly, she looked deeply into its eyes and let go of the block on her mind.

            Through the opening rushed a heady feeling, leaving Lyrissa slightly breathless as she was swirled up in a brilliant aura of silver, white, and blue.  Recognizing it, her eyes widened.

            "Knight…"

            Slightly awed, she never heard the footsteps approaching behind her until Talia's voice, filled with humor, spoke nearly in her ear.  "You know, you have the most incredible timing."

            Lyrissa never thought a Companion could look so embarrassed.

~~ ^ ~~

            Mikel had insisted he was well enough to follow Talia and Lyrissa outside to Companion's Field.  He watched now in amazement as she gently walked alongside her Companion, speaking aloud as the bond wasn't yet strong enough for her to convey her thoughts properly in MindSpeech.

            "So remind me again what happened?" Piel asked, leaning against the fence post, watching as Lyrissa laughed openly.  The two Healer Trainees had also come to tag along, still amazed at the incredible change that seemed to have happened in less than a candlemark and unsure as to what had happened.

            Talia could only shake her head, recalling what Need had told her before returning the sword to Nyara.  After describing Lyrissa's situation, Need had gone on to explain what exactly she had done to open her up.

            ::Remember how I would bond to my bearers when I wasn't quite awake?  I can still bond with people, though lightly, to whoever draws me from my sheath.  Her shield…is very queer, but it didn't recognize me as a threat to her.  It's very much based on her emotions, and since she only knows me as a sword, her defenses were not focused to keep something like me out.  Through the bond, I had her recall memories, much in the same way I can give memories to others::

            Talia had looked blank.  "But if such a memory is unpleasant, I doubt that would help put her at ease…"

            ::True:: the sword had admitted.  ::But something else happened.  I meant to activate happier memories involving her sister and point out that her sister probably wouldn't want her so unhappy.  Something…else happened.  It was like we connected to the Havens momentarily and, quite frankly, it was almost more than I could deal with.  Luckily, I was anchored safely since I have walked the Moonpaths frequently and I know how to maneuver in the spirit world.  Her?  We are lucky she chose to return::

            "Let's just say that she no longer feels guilty for past circumstances," Talia finally replied, uncertain of what to make out of the last bit of information Need had imparted.  One could always argue for divine interference, but…

            "Oh…" Piel didn't seem to know how to respond to that either, merely propping up his head on the fence.

            "I'm glad," murmured Mikel, feeling tired as the sun began to set on the horizon.  "But somehow I don't think her story is over quite yet."

~ Surprised? ^_^  Enjoyed it?  I'm not /quite/ done, so please review! ^_^  I promise that the next update will be much faster = )~