Chapter Twenty-Three – Evening of Truth

They were sitting on the couch.  Jess was reading a book, some novel by an author Will had never heard of.  Will had relaxed into the cushions, leaned his head back and had his eyes closed.  The yoga workout had relaxed him, but he was certain that if he went back to bed he would only toss and turn.  Who was he kidding?  No matter what time he went back to bed he was going to toss and turn.

He replayed the evening in his mind.  He couldn't even count the number of lies he, Jess, and Syd had thrown around.  Then he let his mind wander back over all the years he and Syd had been friends.  How many lies had she told him in those years?  Was anything she shared with him real?  He was shocked at how little he had really known about her.  Will had spent quite a bit of time thinking about honesty since that evening in Paris.

Will glanced at Jess.  "Hey, Jess," Will addressed her.  Jess looked at him and started to correct him but he refused to let her.  He shook a finger at her and said, "Uh-huh.  I'm using your real name for a reason."  Jess frowned and put her book down but let him continue.  "How much of what you've told me in the past week is true, Jess?"

She was caught off guard.  "What?" she asked.  "Will, do you understand what we're trying to do here?"

"Yeah, yeah.  Trying to get my life back," he said.

"And making sure that you're safe," Jess added.

"Yeah, and I appreciate that.  Really.  But I also thought that you were supposed to be my mentor," Will paused, "And eventually my partner," he said referring to Vaughn's promise of ops in their future.

"Yeah, so?"  Jess asked.

"How in the world can I trust you as a partner during an op when I don't even know who you are?"

Jess had been caught off guard again.  She thought about what he said before she answered.  "You're right," she finally conceded.  "I guess that I've been working solo for so long that I've forgotten the dynamics of a partnership."

Will grinned.  "So, start talking.  Has anything you've told me about yourself been real?"

Jess sighed heavily.  She hated talking about herself – her real self.  To talk about it meant she had to confront all the horrors she had experienced.  She thought back over the week.  "Well, the big ones were true… that I'm a widow with no parents or siblings."

"I'm sorry," Will said sympathetically.

"Don't be," Jess brushed off her loneliness.  "It makes this job much easier."

Will studied her and saw the sadness in her eyes.  "No family at all?"

Jess was silent for a moment.  "Just Eric.  He's always been like a brother to me."

"Eric?" Will asked.

"Weiss."

"Weiss?  As in Weiss, your handler Weiss?"  Will couldn't hide his surprise.

Jess smiled.  "Yes.  I've known Eric all my life.  Grew up next to each other, even went to college together."

"No shit?"  Will smiled.  He thought back to one of their recent conversations.  "So, did you really grow up in Maryland?"

"A truth," Jess replied.

"Duke University?" Will asked.

"Class of 89!  Go Blue Devils!"

Will smiled.  "Any other truths?" he asked.

Jess thought back over the week.  She had been doing this for so long, she sometimes had trouble remembering what was her and what was her cover.  "Let's see… I do enjoy my job at the music shop and I love being at the club.  I only drink plain coffee – no cream, no sugar, no foam.  I hate running.  Actually, I hate most any form of exercise except yoga. 

"My political beliefs lean to the left, and my religious beliefs are influenced by my protestant upbringing, my college interest in eastern philosophy, and some new age concepts.

"I believe that marijuana should be legalized…"

"Did you inhale?" Will interrupted her monologue.

"Oh, yeah…"Jess confirmed with a smile.  She continued on, "College basketball is the only sport worth my time.  I prefer reading to watching TV, and movies to plays.  My favorite food: anything with pasta.  My favorite drink, next to coffee, is red wine."  Jess paused.  "Does that about take care of it?"

Will grinned, "Not even close.  Do you like your job?  Not your cover, your real job."

Jess took a deep breath and turned her eyes away from him.  "I used to, but not so much any more."  After she heard how that sounded she looked at him and spoke quickly, "I don't mean this particular op… it's just… I've had…" she looked away from him again, "I'm guess I'm getting a little burnt out."

Will had some experience in interviewing people, and he knew that he had to be careful with his questions or he would lose her.  "So, why did you join in the first place?"

Another long sigh.  She hadn't given that question thought in a very long time.  "There were a lot of reasons, but I guess the biggest one was I hated the idea of living my life by a Day Timer."

Will smiled with understanding.  "So, how about your ops?  Vaughn told me that you've done a lot of long term undercover ops.  What have they been like?"

"You know, Will, I still need to practice a little tonight, and it's getting late," Jess said glancing at the baby grand piano in the next room.

Will reached out and put a hand gently on her arm, "Don't shut me out now, Jess."

She turned to look in his eyes.  He was pleading with her.  "Will, I understand you want to learn more about me, but I still think it's dangerous.  If you start thinking about me more as Jess, you'll have a more difficult time convincing others that I'm Rory."

"I get it.  I want to talk about you, and you don't want to.  I'm not going to back down, and I doubt that you will either.  So what do we do?"

Jess stood up and stretched, "I guess we have to compromise.  How about one night a week we can sit down, and talk about our real lives."

"All truth?" Will asked.

Jess thought about Vaughn.  "All truth," she agreed.

"Okay.  When do we start?" he asked.

"Why? Do you need to put it in your Day Timer?"

****

As Will headed back to the bedroom, Jess sat down at the piano.  An insight she hadn't told him yet was that playing the piano was comforting to her.  If something was bothering her, if she was sad, or uptight, she would loose herself in the music.  It wasn't unusual for her to play for hours at one sitting.  Tonight, she sought comfort in the classics.

After a couple of Liszt compositions, she decided to finish up with Beethoven's Pathetique Sonata.  Immediately after the final chord, her cell phone rang.  It just happened to be within her reach.

"Hello?"

"I really liked that, what was it?"

Jess shook her head at the sound of his voice, but couldn't help smiling.  "Did you not take any music appreciation courses in college?"

Vaughn laughed quietly.  "They didn't offer any of that stuff at my school… I took classes like chemistry, calculus, and economics."

"Yeah, right," Jess said with a small laugh.

"So, what was that?"

"You should like that particular piece, Mike.  It fits us… Pathetique Sonata by a composer you may have heard of… Beethoven?"

"Didn't he used to be the front man for Van Halen?" Vaughn joked.  Another laugh from Jess.  The tone of Vaughn's voice changed, "It was beautiful, Jess."

"Mike, why are you calling this late?"  After a pause she added, "Why are you calling at all?"

Vaughn chose to ignore her questions.  "I see Will does yoga…" he tried to hide his jealousy.

"Yeah," Jess replied simply.  After another, longer silence Jess said, "Mike, do you remember what I told you about not asking for anything more than you needed to as a handler?"

He was silent.  He knew that she was right.  Talking like this just made his desire stronger.  After a pregnant pause, he said, "I have just one question for you…"

"Yeah, what's that?" she asked.

"Will you play Misty for me?"

She laughed again, barely audible.  "Go to bed, Mike," Jess said and she hung up.  She stared at her cell phone for a long time like it would somehow turn into him if she stared at it long enough.

And then she played Misty… from memory.  Her baby grand piano was next to her screened in porch and when the French doors were open her music could be heard throughout the neighborhood.  Vaughn, who was stretched out on a lounge chair on his patio smiled.  "That's my girl."