Author: Katma (kawaiikatma@hotmail.com)
Summary: Sin has been gone for two years now, and Yuna has just started to move on with her life. But a new evil has risen from the sidelines. Will Tidus be able to return and protect the Summoner he loves?
Rating: PG-13 (some violence and romance, but nothing graphic ;-) )
Disclaimer: Tidus, Yuna, and other recognizable characters are not mine. I only wish they were. They belong to Squaresoft and many other people too numerous to name here. I'm only borrowing the characters so that I can mess with their lives. Power, MWAHAHA! So… please don't sue me!! I'm a college student (ie, NO money).
Okay, author rant time. I know the title is cliché, but I was reading Hamlet, and that whole soliloquy just fit so perfectly. I had to use it. And, just a warning in advance, my universe might be a little different from what you'd expect. I read somewhere (don't remember where) that Auron killed Isaaru. Well, in my uni, he's not dead. I need him desperately. So there :-)! Also, when Rikku shows up, she's prolly going to be slightly OOC, but that's because her character in the game annoyed me. I needed her to grow up, so I took some drastic measures. And isn't that an intimidating sentence… She won't show up for a while, though… I need to do some clean-up work around Yuna's part of Spira before I get to her. So you'll just have to read and wait to see what I've done (evil laugh here). Well, I think that's about it. Enjoy, and please review if at all possible. This is my first fanfic about a game, so I'll take any advice/cc, approval, whatever. Thanks!
Kat
"…To die, to sleep:
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come…"
-Hamlet
Chapter One: Letting Go
Yuna dreamed of Zanarkand again that night. She sat on the beach at the edge of the city. Next to her sat Tidus, his warm hand not quite touching hers. The two sat silently, waiting for the sunrise. Yuna was incredibly aware of Tidus' presence next to her, and kept stealing glances at him out of the corner of her eye. The reflected light from the city made his hair look silver instead of its normal sunny gold, and it caused his tan face to glow with an otherworldly light. Yuna suddenly shied away from that train of thought, feeling something dark stirring inside of her. This dream was too happy to ruin with reality.
Distracted as she was, Yuna barely noticed the rosy fingers of dawn stealing across the sky. Tidus noticed her introspection and nudged her gently. She glanced up, startled, and gasped at what she saw. It was beautiful. The sky was a brilliant pink, and the ocean mimicked it. The soft hue seemed to encompass Yuna as the city became washed in rose. Yuna stared, breathless with amazement, then turned delighted eyes to Tidus. He smiled that engaging smile of his at her and said softly,
"See, Yuna?" Isn't it beautiful? I told you we'd see this together."
Speechless, Yuna could only nod as she stared unwaveringly into Tidus' blue eyes. There was an intense expression in them, much like the one present when they kissed in the Macalanian Woods. Tidus shifted closer, and Yuna's heart sped up. He was going to kiss her again, she realized.
"Yuna," he murmured, his lips inching closer. "I just, I wanted to tell you something."
"Yes?" Yuna choked out from a suddenly dry throat. Her hands were starting to shake and her heart felt like it would pound right out of her chest.
"I didn't get a chance to say this before I… well, before, but…"
Just then, Tidus' voice faded out. Yuna's eyes snapped open. Even as she looked, Tidus began to disappear. He mouthed something at her, something she couldn't read because of the fog of tears blurring her vision.
"No!" Yuna cried. "Please! Don't leave me, Tidus. Don't leave me again!"
She stretched out a hand, but it passed through his insubstantial body. As Tidus faded away completely, Yuna gave a gut-wrenching sob and woke herself up.
Yuna sat bolt upright, her eyes flicking rapidly around her room. It was just a dream, she told herself. Only a dream. The cold wetness of tears on her cheek belied her calmness, however. Dream it may have been, but it was still very hard for Yuna. Even though she'd had these dreams almost every night since Sin was defeated, the emotional impact of them never lessened. With a sigh, she levered herself out of bed and walked across her room. She pulled open a door at the end of her room and stepped outside onto her own private balcony. The Lucan air was balmy, but the sea breeze held a bit of a chill. Yuna, dressed only in a thin nightgown, shivered and wrapped her arms around herself as she leaned against the railing.
Yuna, Lulu, and Khimari were staying at Luca's most illustrious hotel, courtesy of Grand Maester Isaaru. They were awaiting the annual blitzball tournament. The Besaid Aurochs, back under the command of Wakka, were doing surprisingly well this year. They actually had a chance of beating the Luca Goers. Yuna hadn't wanted to come back here for many reasons. Luca held too many painful memories for her, as did blitzball. Also, in five days, Grand Maester Isaaru was holding a huge ball in celebration of his upcoming engagement to none other but the savior of Spira, the Summoner Yuna. A match between the new master of Yevon and the summoner who defeated Sin would bring unity back to Yevon and would help the people of Spira. Yuna wanted to make Spira happy, and she needed to get over this obsession with a man who had been dead and gone for two years now. Therefore, she agreed to the engagement with open eyes. It wasn't like this was a love match, after all, Yuna mused. I like Isaaru, and he likes me, but we're doing this for Spira, not for each other.
That thought caused a twinge in Yuna's stomach. This was certainly not what she had imagined for herself when she was a child. Of course, by all rights, she should be dead, not contemplating a wedding. Yuna scolded herself for her maudlin thoughts. But oh, how she missed Tidus. Everyone told her that this ache would eventually diminish until she no longer noticed it. Yuna wasn't sure she wanted that. Even though Tidus had never said he loved her, Yuna was sure he did. Love wasn't something to be thrown away lightly. Although sometimes she wondered how true this was. The star player of the Zanarkand Abes, he was young, handsome, and talented. He had probably had women falling all over him at home. He certainly hadn't kissed like someone with no experience, Yuna thought with a shiver of remembrance. With a soft, sad smile, Yuna lifted her fingers to her lips and whistled, a clear, plaintive sound. She waited, a part of her hoping Tidus would appear. Another moment, however, and she sighed in resignation. Tidus was not coming back. It was time she accepted this and moved on.
"Yuna?" a soft voice said behind her.
Yuna whirled, a hand at her throat.
"Lulu!" she gasped, startled. "You scared me!"
"Are you all right?" the older woman asked, coming to stand on the balcony next to Yuna.
"Yes, Yuna answered, leaning against the balustrade. "I just… couldn't sleep."
"You dreamed about Tidus again, didn't you." It was a statement, not a question. Yuna said nothing. Denying it would be pointless. She couldn't lie convincingly. Admitting it, however, was beyond her powers at the moment.
"Yuna," Lulu sighed, "You have to move on. It's been two years at least since he disappeared."
"Two years tomorrow," Yuna responded softly. "The blitzball tournament is held in memory of him. You should know that."
"Well, maybe I'm not keeping count!" Lulu responded tartly.
"Maybe. But I thought you were watching anything related to Wakka recently. He is playing in tomorrow's tournament."
Lulu flushed red for a moment, but quickly regained her ice queen façade.
"Oh, no. You're not going to change the subject. This is about you, Yuna. I know you loved him, but it's been two years! Two years wasted over a dream. You need to put all this behind you. Accept Isaaru's offer, get married, have children… live the life you were never supposed to have. He loved you enough to give you this chance. Don't waste it by pining away for him."
"I know," Yuna said. "I know. Isaaru and I are announcing our engagement at the party."
"Yuna," Lulu started.
"No. I understand. I must get on with my life. Isaaru is… kind. We will be happy. And our wedding will please Spira. Yes. It is for the best." With that, she turned to face Lulu. The silvery tear tracks belied the bright smile Yuna had pasted on her face. Lulu's heart broke at the too-familiar sight. It just wasn't fair. This woman who was like her little sister deserved so much better.
"Thank you for listening. But now… it's late. You must get some sleep if you are going to cheer on Wakka tomorrow."
Lulu turned red again, but smiled and left, recognizing a dismissal when she heard one. Yuna turned back one last time to glance over at the glistening sea.
She whistled once more, then walked back into her room. Outside, the water gave a strange, restless heave, and was still once more.