Disclaimer: As we all know, Tolkien owns all things Middle Earth. I am
merely borrowing from the estate, and they are welcome to borrow from mine
(though they'll find it amounts to a gold ring which makes me invisible and
RenFest garb).
Chapter 5 - After The Second Ball
The following morning, Talariel was once again caught ready with a mount by her three friends. Cursing her luck, she waited until their horses were ready and they set off for an early ride and some sword play.
Talariel couldn't even look in Legolas's direction and was mostly silent. Flordin and Maluil could sense something was amiss and grew concerned for Talariel. She hadn't been this distracted since Legolas's departure. The silence grew into a difficult tension among the friends.
For his part, Legolas was still at a small loss as to how to deal with Talariel's secret. He had joined Maluil and Flordin this morning specifically with the hope of seeing her. When he spied her at the stables, again his heart leapt as it had the other morning and for the first time he wondered how he had been so blind to the truth. Had he paid even the smallest attention to Talariel instead of letting his mind drift off he would have seen the reality of his situation. He had spent so much time listening only to his mind that he had forgotten what it was like to listen to his heart. Now he was left with sorting out how to deal with this new realization.
Legolas had spent the night wandering and thinking about Talariel. He had pondered everything from when she had changed or if it was he who had changed, to wondering when she had begun to think of him as more than friend, to why he was feeling these emotions now rather than before he left.
It occurred to him that Talariel had always had a special place in his heart and life. He had always given her more attention and time than he had to anyone else in his immediate circle. It hadn't seemed all that unusual while he was spending all that extra time with her alone in the past because of their friendship. But looking back on it now Legolas finally understood that a bond stronger than friendship had been forged between the two of them. The pang that he had felt all that time away was because of their bond. After hours of walking and the sun starting to peek over the horizon, Legolas finally grasped that he had come back for her.
Now he sat astride a horse across from her and had no idea how to bridge the space between them. How does one attempt to go from friend to lover without ruining the friendship? And had he already ruined it with his blindness? Legolas also had to contend with a side of Talariel he had never seen before. He had always known her strength and boldness at every situation. To see her shy, vulnerable and self-conscious was something Legolas would have to come to grips with and figure out a way to overcome. And yet, seeing that there were things about her he did not know after all this time was charming and made her all the more beguiling to him.
As they rode, Legolas came to understand that he had to make clear that he wanted their relationship to evolve rather than change. His father's words came back to him and Legolas knew that somehow he had to reassure Talariel before he could declare himself to her.
Finally noticing the silence in their group, Legolas turned to watch Talariel. She sat straight and rigid on her mount, her tension showing in her posture and the way she kept her eyes forward. His mind turned to the embrace they shared a few hours earlier and he chided himself for not seeing her beauty sooner. Just thinking about her in his arms made his body react. He was having quite some difficulty keeping himself from leaning over and pulling her to him.
Talariel knew that Legolas was watching her intently. His expression was quite focused and serious, and she was in a torrent of confusion and nervousness. She had spent the night between tears and smiles. The kisses they shared were impossible to force out of her mind and she couldn't find any peace or rest at all. She relived the feel of it over and over the whole night. Her lack of rest was visible to anyone looking at her. Somewhat pale and withdrawn, she kept herself distant on purpose. Talariel was terrified of saying anything to the prince for fear that he would know and hate her for her deception. Though she thought herself able to live without his love, she wouldn't be able to bear the loss of his friendship. Assuming the worst, she reacted as best she could to keep her heart intact. Unbidden, a tear found itself trailing down her face because of her stress and lack of rest.
Maluil and Flordin rode a short distance behind the two and watched their friends with great interest. Both were concerned that they had allowed the situation to get out of control and that Talariel was suffering for it. They felt guilty that they hadn't spoken to her about it yet, and feared that she was heading for a heartache greater than when the prince had first left. Neither of them knew that Thranduil and Legolas had spoken the night before, nor that Legolas's feelings for the masked lady were genuine and known to be for Talariel. So when Legolas stopped Talariel's horse and spoke to her, they were both stunned.
Feeling terrible that she was in any kind of pain, his heart ached as he watched the tear trace its way down her cheek. He stopped their horses and closed the distance to her. Cupping her face, he forced her to look at him as he wiped the tear away with his thumb. When her eyes met his, he said "I swear to you, Talariel, I will make things alright. It will work out, I promise." Then he leaned closer and kissed her forehead, his lips lingering.
Talariel just barely managed a nod. She was touched by his concern, but it only served to worsen her mood. His kindness and sweet words of encouragement undid her resolve and her eyes filled with more tears. Completely frustrated at herself for crying more the past few days than she had her entire life, she reared her mount and galloped back before her friends could stop her. All she wanted was to be alone.
Maluil and Flordin watched the exchange in shocked silence as they realized that Legolas knew the truth. When Talariel turned back Flordin followed her. Maluil turned to Legolas and asked "How long have you known?"
"I found out last night. You should have told me. It was cruel to keep it secret. Not cruel to me, but to Talariel. I was just a fool and blind. But she now believes that I have stronger feelings for a stranger than for her and it is not fair to her. Especially when the truth is so different. Had either of you said something, her hurt would not be so strong now" replied Legolas.
"Then you feel other than friendship for her?"
"Yes. All this time my heart and soul knew what my mind refused to see. It was because of her masking herself that my mind was finally able to grasp her as something more than friend, but my heart. my heart knew the entire time. I only wish I had known my heart sooner."
"I am sorry that it got out of hand Legolas. That was never our intention. We thought of it as a small jest, thinking that you would recognize her immediately or that she would have told you by now. You know Flordin and I love Talariel like a sister. We watched the two of you all those years and knew that more had grown between you, but neither of you recognized it. We thought to say something and realized that neither of you would have admitted it at the time as you both refused to see what was going on. It was only when you set to sea that she finally realized her feelings for you. She will hate me for telling you this, but her grief was terrible when you left. It was the knowledge that perhaps she would see you again when she traveled west in the future that kept her going. It had not occurred to Flordin or myself what would happen if you returned. What will you do now?"
Legolas sighed. "I am not sure. I am afraid that no matter what I do at this point she will not believe my intentions."
"What are your intentions?" asked Maluil.
At this question, Legolas turned to his friend and smiled widely but said nothing. They turned their horses and began to ride back to the stables, both hoping that Flordin had caught up to Talariel.
In fact, Flordin had caught up her almost immediately. She knew he followed and admitted to being grateful for his silent and understanding presence. After leaving the stables, they walked together for a long while. Finally reaching the river, they sat upon a large boulder and let the sun wash over them.
Flordin got comfortable, opened his arms to her and smiled when she curled herself into his lap and let him envelope her in a hug. They sat that way until all her tears dried up. When finally Talariel sighed deeply, Flordin teasingly said "The next time we are under attack from orcs, I believe your ability for producing so many tears might help lure them into quite a trap."
Talariel laughed lightly and replied "The next time we are under attack it might help us more if you were better at aiming your bow and keeping your mouth shut."
"Ah! I knew our little imp was still there under all that misery."
Taking a deep breath, Talariel said "I do not know what has come over me these past few days. I am sorry for being so. so. female. I know it is not like me. I will try to stop it."
Flordin laughed and said "I know what has come over you even if you do not want to admit it. You are in love with Legolas. You have been for well over 1500 years and you are terrified he does not feel the same for you. Do not look so shocked at my knowledge. Anyone looking at you would see it." Looking at her reaction, he added "Well, at least anyone other than the prince himself."
Talariel had to laugh at his last remark. Then she said "I do not know what to do anymore, Flordin. I keep going to the balls to be with him. Pretending that he knows who I am, but in the end I only feel more miserable and afraid. Now I am worried that I will lose him as a friend when he discovers the truth about me. That I've been lying to him. He will never forgive me."
Flordin sighed and shook his head at her. He had seen the way Legolas had looked at her this morning. It was obvious that Legolas already knew the truth. Legolas would not have said what he had if he did not have the best intentions for her. But because he could not be positive of Legolas's knowledge until he had heard it from the prince himself, Flordin chose to keep silent with his thoughts about it. Still, he wanted Talariel to feel better and so said "Talariel, Legolas may be upset with the truth but he will always remain a friend. We have all known each other too long and have shared too much. Nothing could change that we are friends. That will always remain."
Talariel knew Flordin spoke the truth, just as Flordin knew that Talariel was only being reactionary to her situation. She was infinitely more rational and logical, but like all creatures she was entitled to a lapse of emotional overreaction on occasion.
"What do I do now Flordin? Legolas will continue to pursue his mystery lady until he knows her identity. He has admitted that he would declare himself to her. He will be terribly disappointed and angry to find me under the mask. How do I tell him without hurting him?" she asked.
"Perhaps you underestimate Legolas. I do not think he would be upset to find it is you who is his masked lady. I saw the way he watched you this morning. But, in truth, there is only one way to find out what his reaction would be. You must reveal yourself. Sooner would be easier than later. Maluil and I will be there for you if you should need us. Though I believe you may be pleasantly surprised by the prince" answered Flordin with a small smile for her.
They sat together until the sun began its descent. On the ride back, Talariel said "You are right Flordin. I will tell him tonight, and hope that he will not be too angry."
*******
Review please. I very much appreciate it.
Chapter 5 - After The Second Ball
The following morning, Talariel was once again caught ready with a mount by her three friends. Cursing her luck, she waited until their horses were ready and they set off for an early ride and some sword play.
Talariel couldn't even look in Legolas's direction and was mostly silent. Flordin and Maluil could sense something was amiss and grew concerned for Talariel. She hadn't been this distracted since Legolas's departure. The silence grew into a difficult tension among the friends.
For his part, Legolas was still at a small loss as to how to deal with Talariel's secret. He had joined Maluil and Flordin this morning specifically with the hope of seeing her. When he spied her at the stables, again his heart leapt as it had the other morning and for the first time he wondered how he had been so blind to the truth. Had he paid even the smallest attention to Talariel instead of letting his mind drift off he would have seen the reality of his situation. He had spent so much time listening only to his mind that he had forgotten what it was like to listen to his heart. Now he was left with sorting out how to deal with this new realization.
Legolas had spent the night wandering and thinking about Talariel. He had pondered everything from when she had changed or if it was he who had changed, to wondering when she had begun to think of him as more than friend, to why he was feeling these emotions now rather than before he left.
It occurred to him that Talariel had always had a special place in his heart and life. He had always given her more attention and time than he had to anyone else in his immediate circle. It hadn't seemed all that unusual while he was spending all that extra time with her alone in the past because of their friendship. But looking back on it now Legolas finally understood that a bond stronger than friendship had been forged between the two of them. The pang that he had felt all that time away was because of their bond. After hours of walking and the sun starting to peek over the horizon, Legolas finally grasped that he had come back for her.
Now he sat astride a horse across from her and had no idea how to bridge the space between them. How does one attempt to go from friend to lover without ruining the friendship? And had he already ruined it with his blindness? Legolas also had to contend with a side of Talariel he had never seen before. He had always known her strength and boldness at every situation. To see her shy, vulnerable and self-conscious was something Legolas would have to come to grips with and figure out a way to overcome. And yet, seeing that there were things about her he did not know after all this time was charming and made her all the more beguiling to him.
As they rode, Legolas came to understand that he had to make clear that he wanted their relationship to evolve rather than change. His father's words came back to him and Legolas knew that somehow he had to reassure Talariel before he could declare himself to her.
Finally noticing the silence in their group, Legolas turned to watch Talariel. She sat straight and rigid on her mount, her tension showing in her posture and the way she kept her eyes forward. His mind turned to the embrace they shared a few hours earlier and he chided himself for not seeing her beauty sooner. Just thinking about her in his arms made his body react. He was having quite some difficulty keeping himself from leaning over and pulling her to him.
Talariel knew that Legolas was watching her intently. His expression was quite focused and serious, and she was in a torrent of confusion and nervousness. She had spent the night between tears and smiles. The kisses they shared were impossible to force out of her mind and she couldn't find any peace or rest at all. She relived the feel of it over and over the whole night. Her lack of rest was visible to anyone looking at her. Somewhat pale and withdrawn, she kept herself distant on purpose. Talariel was terrified of saying anything to the prince for fear that he would know and hate her for her deception. Though she thought herself able to live without his love, she wouldn't be able to bear the loss of his friendship. Assuming the worst, she reacted as best she could to keep her heart intact. Unbidden, a tear found itself trailing down her face because of her stress and lack of rest.
Maluil and Flordin rode a short distance behind the two and watched their friends with great interest. Both were concerned that they had allowed the situation to get out of control and that Talariel was suffering for it. They felt guilty that they hadn't spoken to her about it yet, and feared that she was heading for a heartache greater than when the prince had first left. Neither of them knew that Thranduil and Legolas had spoken the night before, nor that Legolas's feelings for the masked lady were genuine and known to be for Talariel. So when Legolas stopped Talariel's horse and spoke to her, they were both stunned.
Feeling terrible that she was in any kind of pain, his heart ached as he watched the tear trace its way down her cheek. He stopped their horses and closed the distance to her. Cupping her face, he forced her to look at him as he wiped the tear away with his thumb. When her eyes met his, he said "I swear to you, Talariel, I will make things alright. It will work out, I promise." Then he leaned closer and kissed her forehead, his lips lingering.
Talariel just barely managed a nod. She was touched by his concern, but it only served to worsen her mood. His kindness and sweet words of encouragement undid her resolve and her eyes filled with more tears. Completely frustrated at herself for crying more the past few days than she had her entire life, she reared her mount and galloped back before her friends could stop her. All she wanted was to be alone.
Maluil and Flordin watched the exchange in shocked silence as they realized that Legolas knew the truth. When Talariel turned back Flordin followed her. Maluil turned to Legolas and asked "How long have you known?"
"I found out last night. You should have told me. It was cruel to keep it secret. Not cruel to me, but to Talariel. I was just a fool and blind. But she now believes that I have stronger feelings for a stranger than for her and it is not fair to her. Especially when the truth is so different. Had either of you said something, her hurt would not be so strong now" replied Legolas.
"Then you feel other than friendship for her?"
"Yes. All this time my heart and soul knew what my mind refused to see. It was because of her masking herself that my mind was finally able to grasp her as something more than friend, but my heart. my heart knew the entire time. I only wish I had known my heart sooner."
"I am sorry that it got out of hand Legolas. That was never our intention. We thought of it as a small jest, thinking that you would recognize her immediately or that she would have told you by now. You know Flordin and I love Talariel like a sister. We watched the two of you all those years and knew that more had grown between you, but neither of you recognized it. We thought to say something and realized that neither of you would have admitted it at the time as you both refused to see what was going on. It was only when you set to sea that she finally realized her feelings for you. She will hate me for telling you this, but her grief was terrible when you left. It was the knowledge that perhaps she would see you again when she traveled west in the future that kept her going. It had not occurred to Flordin or myself what would happen if you returned. What will you do now?"
Legolas sighed. "I am not sure. I am afraid that no matter what I do at this point she will not believe my intentions."
"What are your intentions?" asked Maluil.
At this question, Legolas turned to his friend and smiled widely but said nothing. They turned their horses and began to ride back to the stables, both hoping that Flordin had caught up to Talariel.
In fact, Flordin had caught up her almost immediately. She knew he followed and admitted to being grateful for his silent and understanding presence. After leaving the stables, they walked together for a long while. Finally reaching the river, they sat upon a large boulder and let the sun wash over them.
Flordin got comfortable, opened his arms to her and smiled when she curled herself into his lap and let him envelope her in a hug. They sat that way until all her tears dried up. When finally Talariel sighed deeply, Flordin teasingly said "The next time we are under attack from orcs, I believe your ability for producing so many tears might help lure them into quite a trap."
Talariel laughed lightly and replied "The next time we are under attack it might help us more if you were better at aiming your bow and keeping your mouth shut."
"Ah! I knew our little imp was still there under all that misery."
Taking a deep breath, Talariel said "I do not know what has come over me these past few days. I am sorry for being so. so. female. I know it is not like me. I will try to stop it."
Flordin laughed and said "I know what has come over you even if you do not want to admit it. You are in love with Legolas. You have been for well over 1500 years and you are terrified he does not feel the same for you. Do not look so shocked at my knowledge. Anyone looking at you would see it." Looking at her reaction, he added "Well, at least anyone other than the prince himself."
Talariel had to laugh at his last remark. Then she said "I do not know what to do anymore, Flordin. I keep going to the balls to be with him. Pretending that he knows who I am, but in the end I only feel more miserable and afraid. Now I am worried that I will lose him as a friend when he discovers the truth about me. That I've been lying to him. He will never forgive me."
Flordin sighed and shook his head at her. He had seen the way Legolas had looked at her this morning. It was obvious that Legolas already knew the truth. Legolas would not have said what he had if he did not have the best intentions for her. But because he could not be positive of Legolas's knowledge until he had heard it from the prince himself, Flordin chose to keep silent with his thoughts about it. Still, he wanted Talariel to feel better and so said "Talariel, Legolas may be upset with the truth but he will always remain a friend. We have all known each other too long and have shared too much. Nothing could change that we are friends. That will always remain."
Talariel knew Flordin spoke the truth, just as Flordin knew that Talariel was only being reactionary to her situation. She was infinitely more rational and logical, but like all creatures she was entitled to a lapse of emotional overreaction on occasion.
"What do I do now Flordin? Legolas will continue to pursue his mystery lady until he knows her identity. He has admitted that he would declare himself to her. He will be terribly disappointed and angry to find me under the mask. How do I tell him without hurting him?" she asked.
"Perhaps you underestimate Legolas. I do not think he would be upset to find it is you who is his masked lady. I saw the way he watched you this morning. But, in truth, there is only one way to find out what his reaction would be. You must reveal yourself. Sooner would be easier than later. Maluil and I will be there for you if you should need us. Though I believe you may be pleasantly surprised by the prince" answered Flordin with a small smile for her.
They sat together until the sun began its descent. On the ride back, Talariel said "You are right Flordin. I will tell him tonight, and hope that he will not be too angry."
*******
Review please. I very much appreciate it.