-- The Devil held my hand and showed me
That which I no longer wished to see.
And I stared with horror
At my image upon the screen
Twisted, shattered, torn,
In various shades of grey.--
-------------
"Do you trust me?"
He nodded slowly. It wasn't hesitation that slowed his nod. It was more like curiosity. A deep, burning curiosity that still surprised him after nearly 4 years of knowing the other man. "With my life."
"This isn't just your life we're talking about here. It's mine too."
"Well duh."
"Come on, Jack. Give me a break. You know exactly what I mean."
"Yeah, but how much blood is this going to cost me?"
"Do you trust me or not?"
Jack sighed. "Of course I trust you."
"Then would you just shut up and sign!"
"What am I signing?"
"I told you. I can't tell you."
Jack leaned back in his chair and folded his arms over his chest. "I'm not signing it until I know what it is."
"Never mind. I'll get Sam to sign it."
"Damn it, Daniel." Jack reached across his desk and grabbed the paper before Daniel could get up and walk out. He glanced at the first sheet unconsciously and stopped…too shocked to go on. "What the hell is this!?"
It was Daniel's turn to sigh. "Why couldn't you have just…"
"I am not going to do this, Daniel. Forget it."
"Why not?"
"Because."
"Because? That's not an answer, Jack. I knew you'd be this way." Daniel tried to take the document back but Jack leaned back in his chair keeping it out of reach.
"Uh uh. You waltz in here, asking me sign this…this…" Jack's hands literally shook he was so angry.
"It's a Living Will, Jack."
"Why in the hell would I want to be responsible for pulling the plug?" The paper fell unnoticed to floor as Jack rubbed his face. "Why, Daniel? Why would you ask me?" He looked up. "I can't do it."
Daniel got up out of his chair and started to pace. "Why not? Jack, we face danger every day. One day something is going to happen…"
Jack sprang from his chair and slapped his hand on the desk. "Nothing is going to happen, you got that!" Jack glared at him, the anger just pouring off him in waves. What was he thinking?
Daniel stopped pacing. "I, uh…I'm just trying to be realistic."
Sighing, Jack backed off. He really was overreacting. "I'm sorry, Daniel." Jack sank down in his chair as if his muscles just gave out. "I…"
"Jack?"
"Nothing. Forget it." Jack waved his hand and went back to work on his reports. "I don't want to talk about it. The answer is no. Find someone else."
"Jack." Daniel walked over to the desk.
"What?"
"The will?"
"Oh." Jack looked around, spotting it on the floor. He picked it up with two fingers, barely touching it. "Here." Jack flung the offending document on his desk.
Daniel grabbed the paper from the desk, hesitating for a moment.
"What?" Jack was beginning to get really irritated now. He needed Daniel to leave before he lost it altogether.
"We all die someday, Jack."
"I know that, Daniel. But it's not going to be today." Nor tomorrow if I can help it.
Daniel walked out. He didn't look back.
Jack let out the breath he'd been holding. He couldn't do it. Wouldn't do it. At least, not for Daniel. He loved him too much for that.