Disclaimer: *eastenders accent * LEAVE IT! IT'S NOT WORTH IT!
Chapter 8 :Randomland!
A grumpy random teenager moches around a classroom. A random hyper teenager skips in, followed by a random teenage teacher. 'Hee hee hee!' says the hyper one. 'Sulking again, Random Teen Squall?' '.nothing.' says Random Teenager Squall. 'Hee hee hee! Nothing again! I knew you'd say nothing!' squeals Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'Hee hee hee!' yells Random teen Selphie and bursts into song. 'Train, train, train, take us away, faaaar away.' 'SHADDAP!' shouts Random Seifer, bursting in. 'Hey, puberty boy! You suck!' '.nothing.' says Random Teenage Squall. 'YOU ARE SO BORING!!!!' screams Random Teenage Hyper-Selphie. 'Whoops! I forgot I only have positive emotions! Hee heee heee!' 'As your teacher I have to tell you to shut up and good luck Seifer. 'I want no good luck,' says Random Teenage Sarky-Seifer. 'I have to fail my exam and turn evil, then I chat up Selphie and you al kick my ass while I call people chicken wuss.' 'Oh right,' says Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'Have no luck then.' 'Thanks, Chicken wuss. Date me Selphie.' Random teenage Love Interest walks in. 'Love me Squall,' says random Teenage Love Interest. '.nothing.' says Random Teenage Squall. 'Can I have her then?' asks Random Teenage Flirty-Irvine. 'Where did he come from?' asks Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'Who cares?' says Random Teenage Hyper-Selphie. 'He loves me, remember, Flirty-Irvine?' 'Who cares?' says Random Sarky-Seifer. 'We're all just random teenagers anyway.'
They all sit around a bit.
'.nothing.'says random Teenage Grumpy-Squall.
Suddenly, breaking the silence and the double glazing, 14 freaky but familiar people whizz through the window screaming. 'Hiiiiii!!!!' yells Random Hyper-Selphie. 'We know you are.' says Random Flirty-Irvine. 'NOOOO!' yells Sephy, who can smell randoms at 50 paces and frankly thinks this place reeks of them even more than Tidus-land. 'Please, tell us where we are?' asks Dagger, going all polite and royal which she does when she's scared. Random Hotdog- freak Annoying Kung-fu Boy Zell jumps in. 'What's going on? Who are you? Who cares? Where are the hotdogs? I WANT HOTDOGS!!!!' And Random Hotdog-freak Annoying Kung Fu Boy runs out. 'I hatte that stoopid little Tidus precursor!!' yells Zidane. 'Who is he?' 'Who are YOU?' asks Random Hyper-Selphie. 'But first hear my train song - Train, train, take us awaaaaaay. 'SHADDAP!' yells Random Sarky-Seifer. 'HEY!' Cloud spots something. 'He's trying to be blonder than me! Can I kill him?!' 'HELL YEAH!!!' yells everyone else in the room. Except Random Squall. You can guess what he says. So Cloud kills Seifer. And steals his his hairgel. 'Sooo.' asks Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'Why ARE you here?' 'Errr.' answers Tifa. 'We thought it might be better than tidusland.' 'It isn't,' confirms Aeris. 'Your walls are such an ICKY colour.' But she shuts up when she notices Sephy looking from one of the desks to her mouth. 'So you come from Tidus land?' Random Love Interest attempts to get to grips with this.. 'OH DEAR GARLAND NO!!!' yells Kuja. 'We come from Terra!' 'Gaia!' interrupts Steiner. 'Earth!' puts in Jack. 'Err..the planet..' offers Cloud, not wanting hs nameless home to get left out of things. 'Well, we MOSTLY come from Gaia,' says Dagger. 'But Terra's COOLER!' complains Kuja. 'Who CARES?' shouts Vivi. 'Oh shut up, you're just jealous cos you're factory produced, and so don't really come from anywhere and therefore don't count!' snaps Zidane. Vivi cries under a table, muttering about Black mage Village. Selphie kicks Zidane and gives Vivi a big hug. Vivi Firagas her. While everyone argues about where they come from, Random love Interest starts fiddling with the potato peeler. 'How did you get here anyway?' asks Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'We used our magical potato peeler to warp dimensions and it selects a world at random, we go there, mess things up and leave,' says Kuja brightly, unaware of how stupid he sounds. 'Riiight,' says Random teenteacher Quistis, making a mental note to clamp down on college drug laws. 'Oooooh!' squeals Random Love Interest suddenly. 'Does your li'l peeler thingy need the weeny umbrella bitty? Cos it kinda doesn't have it anymore.' 'WHAAAAAAT?!?!' Actually, 'WHAAAAAAT?!?!' is the closest I can give you to what Kuja really yelled in a hilariously girly way without raising the rating quite a lot. 'THAT IS AN INTEGRAL PART OF THE PEELER'S WORKING! YOU'VE BROKEN IT!' And he starts to cry like he's been bereaved of a loved one. Well, he has. He loved it like a brother. Actually he loved it a hell of a lot more than his real brother, as he was fond of reminding Zidane. 'Maybe it'll still work,' says Freya, jumping on it. 'Because in my life experience coctail umbrellas don't make a lot of difference, apart from they hurt when you shove tem up your.' 'WILL YOU SHUT UP YOU BURBLING FREAKY-FACED RAT! I DO NOT CARE THAT YOU HAPPEN TO SHOVE DRINKS APPARATUS INTO YOUR BUM!' screamed Kuja, who couldn't take much more. 'Who said bum?' asked Freya. 'I was talking about nostril.' 'Who CARES! Just fix the damn peeler!' But the world did definitely not go blank however much they stomped on it. 'But maybe it flickered a bit?' said Tifa in an attempt to be helpful. 'Wait, lemme get this straight.WE'RE stuck HERE?' This fact dawns on Cloud. 'Uh-huh,' confirms Eiko. 'With THEM?' 'Uh-huh.' 'For EVER?' 'You shouldn't have killed Random Sarky-Seifer,' Selphie informs everyone. 'This is KERMA.' 'Plus he was cute,' says Aeris. 'But not as cute as Tidus.' 'Why do you always fancy annoying blonde gits?' asks Dagger in a friendly manner. 'Gee, thanks,' remarks Cloud. 'You're one to talk! At least Tidus doesn't have a stupid TAIL!' 'HEEEY!!' yell Dagger, Zidane and Kuja. A full scale bitchfight with tail- pulling, thong-twanging and stupid-lace-collar-bow-tie-thingy-ripping ensues. Sephy sits down under a desk and starts to cry loudly for the fifth, if I counted right, and thankfully last, time this fanfic.
THE END
Wheeeee, there went my second ficcy! Please can you wonderful readers help me out by settling an argument: Is Melvyn a cool name for a vampire? I happen to think it is, and not in any way sad or unsuited to a vampire. But certain annoying parties are slagging the name and calling it dorky. Please tell them they're wrong and save all those vampires out there called Melvyn from an eternal unpopularity. Please also tell me how to get the damn ficcies to accept unsigned reviews cos I can't find ANYTHING to sort that. *puppydog eyes * Pweeeease? I'll give you a lollipop (
Chapter 8 :Randomland!
A grumpy random teenager moches around a classroom. A random hyper teenager skips in, followed by a random teenage teacher. 'Hee hee hee!' says the hyper one. 'Sulking again, Random Teen Squall?' '.nothing.' says Random Teenager Squall. 'Hee hee hee! Nothing again! I knew you'd say nothing!' squeals Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'Hee hee hee!' yells Random teen Selphie and bursts into song. 'Train, train, train, take us away, faaaar away.' 'SHADDAP!' shouts Random Seifer, bursting in. 'Hey, puberty boy! You suck!' '.nothing.' says Random Teenage Squall. 'YOU ARE SO BORING!!!!' screams Random Teenage Hyper-Selphie. 'Whoops! I forgot I only have positive emotions! Hee heee heee!' 'As your teacher I have to tell you to shut up and good luck Seifer. 'I want no good luck,' says Random Teenage Sarky-Seifer. 'I have to fail my exam and turn evil, then I chat up Selphie and you al kick my ass while I call people chicken wuss.' 'Oh right,' says Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'Have no luck then.' 'Thanks, Chicken wuss. Date me Selphie.' Random teenage Love Interest walks in. 'Love me Squall,' says random Teenage Love Interest. '.nothing.' says Random Teenage Squall. 'Can I have her then?' asks Random Teenage Flirty-Irvine. 'Where did he come from?' asks Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'Who cares?' says Random Teenage Hyper-Selphie. 'He loves me, remember, Flirty-Irvine?' 'Who cares?' says Random Sarky-Seifer. 'We're all just random teenagers anyway.'
They all sit around a bit.
'.nothing.'says random Teenage Grumpy-Squall.
Suddenly, breaking the silence and the double glazing, 14 freaky but familiar people whizz through the window screaming. 'Hiiiiii!!!!' yells Random Hyper-Selphie. 'We know you are.' says Random Flirty-Irvine. 'NOOOO!' yells Sephy, who can smell randoms at 50 paces and frankly thinks this place reeks of them even more than Tidus-land. 'Please, tell us where we are?' asks Dagger, going all polite and royal which she does when she's scared. Random Hotdog- freak Annoying Kung-fu Boy Zell jumps in. 'What's going on? Who are you? Who cares? Where are the hotdogs? I WANT HOTDOGS!!!!' And Random Hotdog-freak Annoying Kung Fu Boy runs out. 'I hatte that stoopid little Tidus precursor!!' yells Zidane. 'Who is he?' 'Who are YOU?' asks Random Hyper-Selphie. 'But first hear my train song - Train, train, take us awaaaaaay. 'SHADDAP!' yells Random Sarky-Seifer. 'HEY!' Cloud spots something. 'He's trying to be blonder than me! Can I kill him?!' 'HELL YEAH!!!' yells everyone else in the room. Except Random Squall. You can guess what he says. So Cloud kills Seifer. And steals his his hairgel. 'Sooo.' asks Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'Why ARE you here?' 'Errr.' answers Tifa. 'We thought it might be better than tidusland.' 'It isn't,' confirms Aeris. 'Your walls are such an ICKY colour.' But she shuts up when she notices Sephy looking from one of the desks to her mouth. 'So you come from Tidus land?' Random Love Interest attempts to get to grips with this.. 'OH DEAR GARLAND NO!!!' yells Kuja. 'We come from Terra!' 'Gaia!' interrupts Steiner. 'Earth!' puts in Jack. 'Err..the planet..' offers Cloud, not wanting hs nameless home to get left out of things. 'Well, we MOSTLY come from Gaia,' says Dagger. 'But Terra's COOLER!' complains Kuja. 'Who CARES?' shouts Vivi. 'Oh shut up, you're just jealous cos you're factory produced, and so don't really come from anywhere and therefore don't count!' snaps Zidane. Vivi cries under a table, muttering about Black mage Village. Selphie kicks Zidane and gives Vivi a big hug. Vivi Firagas her. While everyone argues about where they come from, Random love Interest starts fiddling with the potato peeler. 'How did you get here anyway?' asks Random Teenteacher Quistis. 'We used our magical potato peeler to warp dimensions and it selects a world at random, we go there, mess things up and leave,' says Kuja brightly, unaware of how stupid he sounds. 'Riiight,' says Random teenteacher Quistis, making a mental note to clamp down on college drug laws. 'Oooooh!' squeals Random Love Interest suddenly. 'Does your li'l peeler thingy need the weeny umbrella bitty? Cos it kinda doesn't have it anymore.' 'WHAAAAAAT?!?!' Actually, 'WHAAAAAAT?!?!' is the closest I can give you to what Kuja really yelled in a hilariously girly way without raising the rating quite a lot. 'THAT IS AN INTEGRAL PART OF THE PEELER'S WORKING! YOU'VE BROKEN IT!' And he starts to cry like he's been bereaved of a loved one. Well, he has. He loved it like a brother. Actually he loved it a hell of a lot more than his real brother, as he was fond of reminding Zidane. 'Maybe it'll still work,' says Freya, jumping on it. 'Because in my life experience coctail umbrellas don't make a lot of difference, apart from they hurt when you shove tem up your.' 'WILL YOU SHUT UP YOU BURBLING FREAKY-FACED RAT! I DO NOT CARE THAT YOU HAPPEN TO SHOVE DRINKS APPARATUS INTO YOUR BUM!' screamed Kuja, who couldn't take much more. 'Who said bum?' asked Freya. 'I was talking about nostril.' 'Who CARES! Just fix the damn peeler!' But the world did definitely not go blank however much they stomped on it. 'But maybe it flickered a bit?' said Tifa in an attempt to be helpful. 'Wait, lemme get this straight.WE'RE stuck HERE?' This fact dawns on Cloud. 'Uh-huh,' confirms Eiko. 'With THEM?' 'Uh-huh.' 'For EVER?' 'You shouldn't have killed Random Sarky-Seifer,' Selphie informs everyone. 'This is KERMA.' 'Plus he was cute,' says Aeris. 'But not as cute as Tidus.' 'Why do you always fancy annoying blonde gits?' asks Dagger in a friendly manner. 'Gee, thanks,' remarks Cloud. 'You're one to talk! At least Tidus doesn't have a stupid TAIL!' 'HEEEY!!' yell Dagger, Zidane and Kuja. A full scale bitchfight with tail- pulling, thong-twanging and stupid-lace-collar-bow-tie-thingy-ripping ensues. Sephy sits down under a desk and starts to cry loudly for the fifth, if I counted right, and thankfully last, time this fanfic.
THE END
Wheeeee, there went my second ficcy! Please can you wonderful readers help me out by settling an argument: Is Melvyn a cool name for a vampire? I happen to think it is, and not in any way sad or unsuited to a vampire. But certain annoying parties are slagging the name and calling it dorky. Please tell them they're wrong and save all those vampires out there called Melvyn from an eternal unpopularity. Please also tell me how to get the damn ficcies to accept unsigned reviews cos I can't find ANYTHING to sort that. *puppydog eyes * Pweeeease? I'll give you a lollipop (