Author: Lee Velviet
Disclaimer: This belongs to J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros. etc. I own nothing!!!
(A/N: This is a bit long-I hope you guys like it-so sorry about the wait. I appreciate all the reviews and e-mails! Thanks you guys, so much! ^-^ Yargh! I've fixed the oopsies, guys-thanks for pointing em out! Like I said, I ALWAYS miss something! About the whole Mark thing-I really don't know how to explain it-I'm just kind of using it as a connection between Draco and Voldie-I know the Mark doesn't necessarily make one evil, that Voldie just uses it to summon his followers, but I'm just kind of playing off it, using it to cause conflict and all-If I'm embellishing it in a bad way, I'm sorry, but I like to think it works in the story. Anyway,thanks again!!!)
8. Death Of A Death Eater
Unable to stay away, Ginny found herself wandering up to the Infirmary after she and Hermione had spoken with Dumbledore.
She pushed through the doors, and immediately caught sight of Draco leaning against a wall, looking impatient-none of his wounds had been treated.
She marched forward despite herself and snapped at him.
"You complete and utter idiot! Are you just going to stand there and bleed to death?"
"The thought had crossed my mind." Draco said rather unsteadily. "What do you care? Would you have felt some kind of remorse when someone finally dragged my dead body off in the morning?"
"No-but it might put me off my food entirely." She shook her head and made him lay down on one of the beds. "Where's Madam Pomfrey? Where are Harry and Ron?"
"Pomfrey wasn't here-they went to find her." He winced and hissed as she pulled open his shirt, and it stuck to the slashing whip marks on his abdomen.
"Sorry…well, at least they're healing-they don't seem to be infected." She looked at his arm hesitantly. "How's your arm?"
"It's still there." He closed his eyes wearily.
She looked at the tired lines of his face, the unusual messiness of his hair, and all of her brains leaked right out of her head. She took his scraped, dirty hand into both of hers and stroked his knuckles with her fingertips.
He took in a deep breath and opening his eyes, he looked at her in surprise. "I thought you wanted me to stay away from you." His voice was low and soft.
Ginny stared at the scrapes on his hand. "I do." She sighed tremulously. "I- I don't know what this is…I mean, I hated you weeks ago…"
"You're saying you don't hate me anymore?"
"I don't know what I'm saying-I shouldn't even be talking to you." Ginny swallowed hard and looked at the wall nervously.
"You do love me, don't you?"
There was no mockery in his voice, no sign of censure or distaste. She looked back at him hesitantly, wondering if he was waiting to jump unmercifully on her next words.
"This is all crazy, you know."
"How very astute of you." He drawled jadedly.
"Draco…" She looked at him helplessly.
He looked away.
"I was so scared back there…"
"You were scared?" He snorted. "You should have been on my side of the room."
Ginny tightened her hands around his, trying to convey her understanding.
His fingers curled around hers hesitantly.
"Are you admitting you were frightened?" She said this a little incredulously.
He met her eyes with an odd look. "Only fools fear nothing, Ginny."
She wet her dry lips and laughed. "So…is this still all my fault?"
He cursed and pulled his hand away. "I'm bloody talking to myself."
"I was just making a joke," she said hollowly, missing his touch, and hating herself for it. So much had changed between them in the space of a single day…it was disorienting.
"No…I just-do you have any idea how hard this is for me?"
She ran a hand through her tangled red curls, and swallowed. "I- I like to think I do-"
"I meant, I…I was trying to say I was s-" He stopped, looking a little green.
"What?" Ginny watched him closely.
"I wanted to say I was so-" He clamped his mouth shut and glared at her.
A smile curved her lips. "Draco Malfoy, are you trying to apologize to me?"
"No…yes…" he mumbled, looking childishly mutinous.
"About what?"
"For blaming you-it's really not been all your fault."
She gaped at him.
He stared hard at the ceiling as if it were the most fascinating thing he'd ever seen.
"I wish I had a million Galleons!" Ginny shouted.
He looked at her as if she'd lost her mind. "What are you doing?"
She shrugged sheepishly. "I never thought I'd hear the day when Draco Malfoy would apologize for anything-I figured if that miracle had happened, it was worth a try."
He shook his head, "You are just strange."
Ginny turned away, found a basin, and filled it with warm soapy water.
Draco watched her approach with the water and a soft cloth, and arched one pale brow. "What are you doing?"
"I'm going to clean you up, Mr. Malfoy." She dipped the cloth into the basin and wrung it out, and then brought it to his face.
He grabbed her wrist, as if intent on stopping her, but then released it with a sigh. "Whatever. I'm too tired to argue."
"Hmmm-If anyone walked in right now I'd be known as the girl who took advantage of Draco Malfoy, no doubt." Ginny smiled and swiftly washed the dirt and blood from his face. She rinsed the cloth, and started in on his hands-she glanced over at him briefly to see him resting with his eyes closed.
"If this is your idea of taking advantage, I'm sorely disappointed," he murmured sleepily a few minutes later. "What's wrong? Potter not teaching you anything?"
Ginny paused as she dabbed tentatively at his ribs. "You have a dirty mind, you know that?"
"My mind is no dirtier than yours-don't bother denying it, either." He looked at her through heavily lidded eyes. "I know what I feel when you touch me, Ginny…and I know you feel it, too…no matter what has happened between us, or our families in the past." Draco licked his dry lips, and Ginny hastened to get him a drink of water.
After, she wiped the last trace of grime from his chest, and laid the cloth and water aside. "What if I don't?" she said finally, not daring to meet his eyes. "What if I don't feel it?"
Draco caught her elbow and she found herself being dragged down across him. She tried to keep her body from touching his half-raw wounds, but he didn't seem to care-he caught her lips with his, and ran his hand across her back, down to her hip where he pressed her close against him.
Ginny sighed against him and looked at him owlishly when he threaded his hands through her hair and tugged her head away.
He was breathing hard, and his eyes were burning silver-bright. "Tell me you didn't feel anything."
She kissed him again, and he stiffened in surprise before he cupped her head and pulled her closer, his mouth hot and open against hers.
She pulled away minutes later, sighing shakily, and moved off of him, her legs trembling.
"I guess I'd be a liar," Ginny murmured somewhat regretfully.
She busied herself yanking off his shoes, and then before she could think about it, she pulled off his filthy jeans too. She ignored his slight gasp as she pulled the soaking denim from his hips, and down his lean thighs. She tossed the ruined jeans into a bin in the corner and tried not to stare at the steel-gray silk boxers that were so thin they left hardly anything to the imagination, and in his present state-Ginny gulped and turned her widened eyes away quickly, blushing hotly. She ignored his amused smirk and dragged the sheets up over him to his trim waist.
She took a step away before she dared to look at him again.
He watched her with a look of yearning so intense it took her breath away.
"Gin, I-"
Just then Harry, Ron and Madam Pomfrey rushed in, with Albus Dumbledore drawing close behind, and Professor Snape near on his heels.
Draco's face immediately closed up and went as cold as an arctic wind.
Ginny ducked her head and withdrew from his bedside to retreat to where Harry and Ron stood. She ignored the curious looks they gave her.
The elderly Headmaster stepped up to the bed and regarded Draco solemnly.
"May I see?"
It was obvious what he asked.
Draco's jaw went taut and he turned his arm over, his hand fisted tightly. He stared at the ceiling, ignoring everyone.
Ginny watched as the Professor bent slightly and looked at Draco's arm over his half-moon spectacles.
After a long moment he sighed, and straightened. "Poppy…I believe this lad is in need of your assistance."
"Yes Sir…" Madam Pomfrey stepped forward with purpose. "I'm afraid you'll have to go on, now, Ginny, Harry, Ron…"
"All right," Harry said, and put his arm around Ginny's shoulder to lead her away.
Ginny couldn't help looking back over her shoulder at Draco, and he met her eyes briefly just before the doors swung closed behind her.
Ginny decided she couldn't just leave him there like that…she knew she didn't want to be alone after all that had happened; Harry, Hermione and Ron were exhausted, and going on to bed.
She waited impatiently until she thought everyone should be asleep, and crept into the boy's dorm to borrow Harry's Invisibility cloak. Harry had told her and Hermione the location of it in case of extreme emergencies…she felt horribly guilty as she tugged it from the bottom of his trunk…it wasn't really an emergency. She very nearly put it back.
Ginny finally made her way back to the Infirmary under it, trying not to question her motives. It seemed she'd been questioning every move she made the past few hours, and it was wearing on her dreadfully.
She crept through the door, holding her breath when she saw Snape still standing next to Draco's bedside.
Draco looked so pale and worn, Ginny couldn't help herself-she made her way silently around the end of the bed and stood opposite Snape. She listened to Snape speak to Draco in quiet tone, and what the man had to say was shocking.
"I'm very sorry to inform you, Mr. Malfoy, that we've received word of your Father's death." Professor Snape said haltingly.
Making sure to keep her skin covered with the cloak, she reached her hand out and touched his shoulder.
Draco didn't move.
"How?" He asked this coldly, as if he didn't really care.
Snape cleared his throat. "It was the killing curse."
"Voldemort," Draco murmured.
"Yes…" Snape laid a hand on his student's arm momentarily before moving away. "I'm- very sorry for your loss. If you need to speak…"
They were empty words, words that were said often, and often not truly meant.
Draco merely nodded. His features looked as if they'd been carved from stone.
"I'll leave you be now," the older man said, retreating into the shadows, and then to the door. He paused, and said quietly, "Tomorrow will be a long day-I suggest you rest." Snape left silently.
Ginny pulled the hood off her shoulders and tightened her hold on his shoulder. He didn't speak.
"Would you like me to go?" She asked softly, looking down at his now bandaged arm.
"Do you want to? Are you sure you want to be alone with a Death Eater?"
Ginny's head snapped up and she met his eyes briefly before he closed his, and turned his head away on the pillow.
"You should learn the difference between pity and sympathy, Weasley," he said tonelessly.
"Don't start, Draco." Ginny sighed, and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling him forward into her arms. He rested his head against her hesitantly, as if he were unaccustomed to contact.
"I can't believe he's gone…"
"He can't hurt you anymore, Draco." She threaded her fingers through his mussed hair, wondering when things had turned around so.
Draco snorted. "You know what the irony of it is? I cared about him-he was an evil, twisted freak, and he was my Father, and I still cared about him." He shook his head and slowly wrapped his arms around her back. "Voldemort must have been hugely pissed off after the fiasco in the cellar, to have killed him. Lucius remained loyal to him long after the others in their circle denounced him."
"When I think of what your childhood must have been like…"
Draco shrugged. "He gave me this life…such as it is. Besides, he wasn't always such a rotting bastard. He gave me a bloody enormous allowance, "the corner of his lips lifted in a humorless smile.
As if money could ever make up for what he'd done to him. Ginny whispered against his temple, "We'll just remember him that way, then."
He pressed a warm kiss to the underside of her chin and sighed, pulling away to look at her.
"What did Dumbledore say?"
"He believed me when I said I was unwilling…mostly because of what you told him." He looked at her searchingly. "Why would you have done anything to place me in a good light after what I've said to you?"
She couldn't answer-her brain had officially shut down. She blinked at him sleepily. "I'm so tired-I don't know how I'm going to get back up to the dorms."
He pulled her down beside him, ignoring her protests. "Go to sleep, and stop blabbering for a bit, you scrawny brat. Give my ears a rest. I'll cover you with the cloak-it'll be safe enough."
Ginny rested her head thankfully against his hard shoulder and relaxed as he tugged the cloak over her head so that she disappeared fully.
Draco lay awake for a long time despite his exhaustion. He felt as if he was standing at a crossroads, and he was unsure which direction to take.
He listened to Ginny's even breathing, unbelieving that she was actually there-just that morning he'd been thinking of ways to make her absolutely miserable.
Draco closed his eyes and wondered what briefly what had happened to Pansy. It was unfortunate, really, that she hadn't been found dead alongside his Father. It'd have saved him the trouble of strangling her when he next saw the conniving, scheming, evil little wench.
Ginny stirred against his shoulder and he opened his eyes-he saw her small fingers peek out from the edge of the cloak and curl against his bare stomach.
Draco felt his lips twist as his body reacted, and he almost felt sorry for the little Weasley-she had no idea what she was in for if she made the mistake of truly falling for him. He'd surely take advantage of her any way he could, and when he got bored of her, he'd kick her to the side like unwanted trash.
He was after all, his Father's son.
Ginny woke early and crept from Draco's bedside feeling unbearably guilty. She couldn't bring herself to look at him as she left.
She left the cloak on Harry's trunk, uncaring anymore if anyone knew she'd taken it, and went to her own bed, crawling into it and pulling the covers over her head.
Clamping her aching, tired eyes shut, she burrowed into her pillow, and allowed sleep to overtake her, eager to escape her troubles for a even a little while longer.
The school was buzzing with the rumors of the past night-Ginny found herself being bombarded from all sides, and was reminded disturbingly of her days following the incident in the Chamber of Secrets.
She didn't see Draco all day Sunday, and she assumed he was still in the Infirmary. She felt guilty for not going to visit him, but she also felt guilty for thinking about it.
On Monday, it was classes, as usual-Draco had still not returned. She continued to avoid contact with everyone, including Harry, Ron, and even Hermione. She was afraid of the questions they would ask-she still didn't know how she would begin to answer them.
Tuesday brought no end to her troubles-nor did Wednesday or Thursday-and Ron managed to pin her down after dinner on Friday, making her absolutely miserable. He commenced bugging her unto Death about her 'relationship' with Malfoy-Ginny just withdrew farther into herself, refusing to speak until, with a worried frown, he finally left her alone.
Later that evening, she was making her way back up the path to the castle from a much needed visit to Hagrid's hut-she'd taken to visiting him every few days, and it had become a comforting habit, sitting in the overly large furniture, listening to him talk about utter nonsense in his gruff voice, and drinking the too strong tea he brewed.
He hadn't said a word about what had happened the week before, and she was greatly appreciative of it.
She felt much better as she made her way up the stone path, feeling gravel crunching under her feet.
As Ginny neared the torch-lit steps leading into the entrance hall, she heard steps behind her, and turned, thinking it was Hagrid-instead she saw the twisted expression of Pansy Parkinson-and the world went dark before a scream of alarm could escape her lips.
Draco looked up boredly as Ron Weasley stormed into the Infirmary early Saturday morning, with Potter and Granger close behind.
"Hurt yourself again, Weasley? Really, you should try to be more careful- the medical care here isn't free, you know. Haven't you got any respect for your impoverished parents?"
He watched the boy step forward and he grabbed the throat of his pajamas. "What did you do to her, you stinking Death Eater?"
Draco narrowed his eyes. "What are you talking about?"
"Ginny's gone. Don't tell me you don't know where she is!" Ron's eyes burned fiercely in his reddening face. "If you've hurt her, I'll kill you, slow-"
Draco bared his teeth and tore his hands from his throat. "I don't know what you're on about, Weasley-are you telling me she's missing?"
"As if you didn't know!" Ron trembled with his fury, his hands clenched into fists at his sides.
"I haven't seen her in days, you stupid sot." Draco threw back the sheets, and stood, clutching his bruised side. "Between the three of you, couldn't you keep her safe, you pathetic fool? I suppose watching over one small girl was too troublesome for the Gryffindor Dream Team?"
Ron watched grouchily as he went behind a screen to dress. "What the hell are you doing, Malfoy?"
"I'm going to go find her, you useless prat." Draco emerged, clothed, pulling on his black robes.
"You aren't going anywhere near her," Ron said angrily, standing in front of him.
"Out of my way, Weasley-If Voldemort has got her, she doesn't have much time."
"You don't get it, do you? I do not believe that you're concerned about her one little bit. You may have been able to convince everyone else that you didn't want the bloody Mark, but you can't fool me! None of this would have happened if it hadn't been for you! You're the reason he took her!"
Harry seemed to agree with Ron.
"Oh give over, Malfoy-You really expect us to believe that after all these years, you're suddenly suffering from quixotic impulses?"
"What?" Draco looked at him-what was the prat going on about?
"Nothing-it's a Muggle thing." Harry sighed, shaking his head. He looked at Draco appraisingly. "I really don't trust you, Malfoy. You've seen Voldemort and your father's work now." Harry looked at him, his eyes hard. "Where do your loyalties lay? What do you think, now?"
Draco clenched his teeth and ignored him. "Do you want her to die?"
Ron just glared at him.
"Just stand here and keep blaming everyone else for everything wrong in your life, Weasley-I'm going to go find her." With a feral sneer, Draco turned and strode out of the Infirmary doors, ignoring the sudden appearance of Madam Pomfrey, and her shouts of protest.
He was an hour down the trail in the Forbidden Forest when a breathless Ron. Harry, and Hermione caught him up, none of them saying a single word.
A week later, Ginny had still not been found. That day they'd been all through Hogsmeade, and all around the surrounding area-They'd been ordered back to the school and told that the Aurors from the Ministry would be taking over the search.
He'd been very nearly interrogated by the Wizard's sent from the Ministry to make enquiries-thankfully, they'd taken his word when he said he'd known nothing about it-because he'd been backed by Dumbledore himself.
Draco had left the school to help attend to his late father's affairs, and to comfort his grieving Mother. He remained at the family home for several weeks, trying unsuccessfully to hunt down any of his Father's contacts, searching tirelessly through papers and his father's secret rooms and chambers for clues-but to no avail. His mother took to staying in her private suite, and he let her-looking on her reminded him of his father.
He never stopped looking for Ginny, and from the letters and notes he'd been sent by Owl Post, neither had her brother or her friends.
The Christmas break came, and to his surprise, the three showed up on his doorstep. They made plans to renew the search again, and question everyone for miles mercilessly-and, surprise, surprise, Potter had come up with a little information from an anonymous source, on where Voldemort might be hiding out.
He had the House Elves show the trio to rooms in the cavernous manor, and retreated, because looking on them made him aware of just how much he missed Ginny.
Draco ended the evening, as he had of late, sitting in his father's library, drinking himself into oblivion. He was very nearly there when the troublesome Granger wandered in with a look of disbelief.
"What are you doing?"
"Just experimenting with a little bit of destruction," he drawled, lifting his glass in a drunken sort of salute.
The bushy haired girl came further into the room, still gaping. "You're sixteen years old! You can't drink!"
Draco felt a brow raise, and took a very long, slow, very deliberate drink from his glass. "Oh, horror, I'm breaking a rule."
"You obviously have rules of your own," the girl sighed, taking a seat nearby.
"Hmmm," Draco agreed blearily.
"Don't you think you've had enough?" She watched him doubtfully.
"Not nearly, my dear Granger…not nearly enough. I can still remember her face."
"How can you speak of her as if you care about her? Don't you have any sense of honor?"
"I have mounds of honor, Granger, bloody heaps of it," he chuckled derisively. "Malfoy honor."
"Truly? And what man honors himself to fight a girl?"
Draco looked at her coldly. "What are you blathering on about?"
"I know about the duel-I know you actually intended on dueling with her-a girl!"
"Whatever happened or didn't happen between us is none of your business, Granger."
"She's just a girl-she didn't know what she was doing when she challenged you," she protested.
"Just a girl?" Draco snorted. "I'll have you know, that girl near cracked my shin, jabbed out my eye, and locked me in a shower stall in freezing water and left me all bloody night long. Tell me I shouldn't have wanted payback."
Draco got up and unsteadily poured himself another finger of whiskey. He remembered the color of Ginny's eyes, and shrugged, filling the glass to its brim.
Hermione watched the tall boy disapprovingly as he flung himself uncaringly onto a velvet settee.
"Do you love her?"
He looked at her from his slumped, careless position and smirked. "Me? Love a Weasley? Of course not."
"Does she love you?"
"Surely. What's not to love? I've got looks, money, influence…and a lovely outlook on life." He smirked again, and closed his eyes. "To tell the truth- which I am certainly not known for-I think she really does. I pity her."
"Why do you think she loves you?" Hermione pressed.
"Hell, Granger, I don't know!" He looked over at her in pure frustration, his eyes red-rimmed. "Why do you love Weasley? Why do the stars shine? Why does God suffer Voldemort to live?"
"Calm down," Hermione sighed, rubbing her own eyes tiredly.
Draco took a deep breath. "I lied, you know."
"Big surprise," Hermione muttered lowly. "What did you lie about?"
"I do love her-I think. I care about her, amazingly enough. I guess that's the real reason I pity her." She watched as he took another gulp. "Weasley was probably right, you now-all of this is my fault. Ginny would be safe now, if it hadn't been for me." He stared into the glass as he rested it on his chest. "Maybe I should just leave-move away, go to school someplace else, when we find her."
Hermione noticed he said 'when' and not 'if'. 'When'.
"Maybe you should let Ginny make her own judgment about you before you decide to just go," Hermione said grudgingly. She had never seen Draco Malfoy concerned about anyone besides himself.
Draco took a long drink of his late father's whiskey, ignoring Hermione's look of censure, and lounged back on the antique velvet settee, eyes half lidded and bloodshot.
"No…that's one thing about women," he muttered, slightly slurring his words together as he drawled. "They don't realize their mistakes until after they've made them; they never do. Look at my Mother." He laughed derisively and took another drink. "Listen to me being all bloody noble, when what I really want to do is-"
Hermione cut him off. "I don't want to hear it-in case you haven't noticed, I am a woman-suffice it to say, I know a bit more about these matters than you. I think Ginny would be-upset-if you just left."
Draco sighed.
She heard his glass fall from his hand and roll, empty across the carpet, and she looked over, realizing he had fallen asleep. She got up from her seat and walked across the room to him, noticing with no little surprise how vulnerable he looked as he slept-and how very unhappy.
His usually neatly combed-back hair tumbled messily across his brow, and his expensive clothes were stained and rumpled. She took in the Dark Mark seared into the sensitive skin of his inner forearm, revealed by his rolled up shirtsleeves, and shivered despite herself. She had come to respect him, grudgingly over the past few weeks, but she sensed darkness in him, and it frightened her. She couldn't trust him, and it made her extremely nervous…
TBC
(Review, Review! Please? P.S. For those of you wondering about the whole, 'Last Hogsmeade Weekend of the year' thing? I meant the year, literally- before Christmas, New years, and all I mean! ^-^)
Disclaimer: This belongs to J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros. etc. I own nothing!!!
(A/N: This is a bit long-I hope you guys like it-so sorry about the wait. I appreciate all the reviews and e-mails! Thanks you guys, so much! ^-^ Yargh! I've fixed the oopsies, guys-thanks for pointing em out! Like I said, I ALWAYS miss something! About the whole Mark thing-I really don't know how to explain it-I'm just kind of using it as a connection between Draco and Voldie-I know the Mark doesn't necessarily make one evil, that Voldie just uses it to summon his followers, but I'm just kind of playing off it, using it to cause conflict and all-If I'm embellishing it in a bad way, I'm sorry, but I like to think it works in the story. Anyway,thanks again!!!)
8. Death Of A Death Eater
Unable to stay away, Ginny found herself wandering up to the Infirmary after she and Hermione had spoken with Dumbledore.
She pushed through the doors, and immediately caught sight of Draco leaning against a wall, looking impatient-none of his wounds had been treated.
She marched forward despite herself and snapped at him.
"You complete and utter idiot! Are you just going to stand there and bleed to death?"
"The thought had crossed my mind." Draco said rather unsteadily. "What do you care? Would you have felt some kind of remorse when someone finally dragged my dead body off in the morning?"
"No-but it might put me off my food entirely." She shook her head and made him lay down on one of the beds. "Where's Madam Pomfrey? Where are Harry and Ron?"
"Pomfrey wasn't here-they went to find her." He winced and hissed as she pulled open his shirt, and it stuck to the slashing whip marks on his abdomen.
"Sorry…well, at least they're healing-they don't seem to be infected." She looked at his arm hesitantly. "How's your arm?"
"It's still there." He closed his eyes wearily.
She looked at the tired lines of his face, the unusual messiness of his hair, and all of her brains leaked right out of her head. She took his scraped, dirty hand into both of hers and stroked his knuckles with her fingertips.
He took in a deep breath and opening his eyes, he looked at her in surprise. "I thought you wanted me to stay away from you." His voice was low and soft.
Ginny stared at the scrapes on his hand. "I do." She sighed tremulously. "I- I don't know what this is…I mean, I hated you weeks ago…"
"You're saying you don't hate me anymore?"
"I don't know what I'm saying-I shouldn't even be talking to you." Ginny swallowed hard and looked at the wall nervously.
"You do love me, don't you?"
There was no mockery in his voice, no sign of censure or distaste. She looked back at him hesitantly, wondering if he was waiting to jump unmercifully on her next words.
"This is all crazy, you know."
"How very astute of you." He drawled jadedly.
"Draco…" She looked at him helplessly.
He looked away.
"I was so scared back there…"
"You were scared?" He snorted. "You should have been on my side of the room."
Ginny tightened her hands around his, trying to convey her understanding.
His fingers curled around hers hesitantly.
"Are you admitting you were frightened?" She said this a little incredulously.
He met her eyes with an odd look. "Only fools fear nothing, Ginny."
She wet her dry lips and laughed. "So…is this still all my fault?"
He cursed and pulled his hand away. "I'm bloody talking to myself."
"I was just making a joke," she said hollowly, missing his touch, and hating herself for it. So much had changed between them in the space of a single day…it was disorienting.
"No…I just-do you have any idea how hard this is for me?"
She ran a hand through her tangled red curls, and swallowed. "I- I like to think I do-"
"I meant, I…I was trying to say I was s-" He stopped, looking a little green.
"What?" Ginny watched him closely.
"I wanted to say I was so-" He clamped his mouth shut and glared at her.
A smile curved her lips. "Draco Malfoy, are you trying to apologize to me?"
"No…yes…" he mumbled, looking childishly mutinous.
"About what?"
"For blaming you-it's really not been all your fault."
She gaped at him.
He stared hard at the ceiling as if it were the most fascinating thing he'd ever seen.
"I wish I had a million Galleons!" Ginny shouted.
He looked at her as if she'd lost her mind. "What are you doing?"
She shrugged sheepishly. "I never thought I'd hear the day when Draco Malfoy would apologize for anything-I figured if that miracle had happened, it was worth a try."
He shook his head, "You are just strange."
Ginny turned away, found a basin, and filled it with warm soapy water.
Draco watched her approach with the water and a soft cloth, and arched one pale brow. "What are you doing?"
"I'm going to clean you up, Mr. Malfoy." She dipped the cloth into the basin and wrung it out, and then brought it to his face.
He grabbed her wrist, as if intent on stopping her, but then released it with a sigh. "Whatever. I'm too tired to argue."
"Hmmm-If anyone walked in right now I'd be known as the girl who took advantage of Draco Malfoy, no doubt." Ginny smiled and swiftly washed the dirt and blood from his face. She rinsed the cloth, and started in on his hands-she glanced over at him briefly to see him resting with his eyes closed.
"If this is your idea of taking advantage, I'm sorely disappointed," he murmured sleepily a few minutes later. "What's wrong? Potter not teaching you anything?"
Ginny paused as she dabbed tentatively at his ribs. "You have a dirty mind, you know that?"
"My mind is no dirtier than yours-don't bother denying it, either." He looked at her through heavily lidded eyes. "I know what I feel when you touch me, Ginny…and I know you feel it, too…no matter what has happened between us, or our families in the past." Draco licked his dry lips, and Ginny hastened to get him a drink of water.
After, she wiped the last trace of grime from his chest, and laid the cloth and water aside. "What if I don't?" she said finally, not daring to meet his eyes. "What if I don't feel it?"
Draco caught her elbow and she found herself being dragged down across him. She tried to keep her body from touching his half-raw wounds, but he didn't seem to care-he caught her lips with his, and ran his hand across her back, down to her hip where he pressed her close against him.
Ginny sighed against him and looked at him owlishly when he threaded his hands through her hair and tugged her head away.
He was breathing hard, and his eyes were burning silver-bright. "Tell me you didn't feel anything."
She kissed him again, and he stiffened in surprise before he cupped her head and pulled her closer, his mouth hot and open against hers.
She pulled away minutes later, sighing shakily, and moved off of him, her legs trembling.
"I guess I'd be a liar," Ginny murmured somewhat regretfully.
She busied herself yanking off his shoes, and then before she could think about it, she pulled off his filthy jeans too. She ignored his slight gasp as she pulled the soaking denim from his hips, and down his lean thighs. She tossed the ruined jeans into a bin in the corner and tried not to stare at the steel-gray silk boxers that were so thin they left hardly anything to the imagination, and in his present state-Ginny gulped and turned her widened eyes away quickly, blushing hotly. She ignored his amused smirk and dragged the sheets up over him to his trim waist.
She took a step away before she dared to look at him again.
He watched her with a look of yearning so intense it took her breath away.
"Gin, I-"
Just then Harry, Ron and Madam Pomfrey rushed in, with Albus Dumbledore drawing close behind, and Professor Snape near on his heels.
Draco's face immediately closed up and went as cold as an arctic wind.
Ginny ducked her head and withdrew from his bedside to retreat to where Harry and Ron stood. She ignored the curious looks they gave her.
The elderly Headmaster stepped up to the bed and regarded Draco solemnly.
"May I see?"
It was obvious what he asked.
Draco's jaw went taut and he turned his arm over, his hand fisted tightly. He stared at the ceiling, ignoring everyone.
Ginny watched as the Professor bent slightly and looked at Draco's arm over his half-moon spectacles.
After a long moment he sighed, and straightened. "Poppy…I believe this lad is in need of your assistance."
"Yes Sir…" Madam Pomfrey stepped forward with purpose. "I'm afraid you'll have to go on, now, Ginny, Harry, Ron…"
"All right," Harry said, and put his arm around Ginny's shoulder to lead her away.
Ginny couldn't help looking back over her shoulder at Draco, and he met her eyes briefly just before the doors swung closed behind her.
Ginny decided she couldn't just leave him there like that…she knew she didn't want to be alone after all that had happened; Harry, Hermione and Ron were exhausted, and going on to bed.
She waited impatiently until she thought everyone should be asleep, and crept into the boy's dorm to borrow Harry's Invisibility cloak. Harry had told her and Hermione the location of it in case of extreme emergencies…she felt horribly guilty as she tugged it from the bottom of his trunk…it wasn't really an emergency. She very nearly put it back.
Ginny finally made her way back to the Infirmary under it, trying not to question her motives. It seemed she'd been questioning every move she made the past few hours, and it was wearing on her dreadfully.
She crept through the door, holding her breath when she saw Snape still standing next to Draco's bedside.
Draco looked so pale and worn, Ginny couldn't help herself-she made her way silently around the end of the bed and stood opposite Snape. She listened to Snape speak to Draco in quiet tone, and what the man had to say was shocking.
"I'm very sorry to inform you, Mr. Malfoy, that we've received word of your Father's death." Professor Snape said haltingly.
Making sure to keep her skin covered with the cloak, she reached her hand out and touched his shoulder.
Draco didn't move.
"How?" He asked this coldly, as if he didn't really care.
Snape cleared his throat. "It was the killing curse."
"Voldemort," Draco murmured.
"Yes…" Snape laid a hand on his student's arm momentarily before moving away. "I'm- very sorry for your loss. If you need to speak…"
They were empty words, words that were said often, and often not truly meant.
Draco merely nodded. His features looked as if they'd been carved from stone.
"I'll leave you be now," the older man said, retreating into the shadows, and then to the door. He paused, and said quietly, "Tomorrow will be a long day-I suggest you rest." Snape left silently.
Ginny pulled the hood off her shoulders and tightened her hold on his shoulder. He didn't speak.
"Would you like me to go?" She asked softly, looking down at his now bandaged arm.
"Do you want to? Are you sure you want to be alone with a Death Eater?"
Ginny's head snapped up and she met his eyes briefly before he closed his, and turned his head away on the pillow.
"You should learn the difference between pity and sympathy, Weasley," he said tonelessly.
"Don't start, Draco." Ginny sighed, and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling him forward into her arms. He rested his head against her hesitantly, as if he were unaccustomed to contact.
"I can't believe he's gone…"
"He can't hurt you anymore, Draco." She threaded her fingers through his mussed hair, wondering when things had turned around so.
Draco snorted. "You know what the irony of it is? I cared about him-he was an evil, twisted freak, and he was my Father, and I still cared about him." He shook his head and slowly wrapped his arms around her back. "Voldemort must have been hugely pissed off after the fiasco in the cellar, to have killed him. Lucius remained loyal to him long after the others in their circle denounced him."
"When I think of what your childhood must have been like…"
Draco shrugged. "He gave me this life…such as it is. Besides, he wasn't always such a rotting bastard. He gave me a bloody enormous allowance, "the corner of his lips lifted in a humorless smile.
As if money could ever make up for what he'd done to him. Ginny whispered against his temple, "We'll just remember him that way, then."
He pressed a warm kiss to the underside of her chin and sighed, pulling away to look at her.
"What did Dumbledore say?"
"He believed me when I said I was unwilling…mostly because of what you told him." He looked at her searchingly. "Why would you have done anything to place me in a good light after what I've said to you?"
She couldn't answer-her brain had officially shut down. She blinked at him sleepily. "I'm so tired-I don't know how I'm going to get back up to the dorms."
He pulled her down beside him, ignoring her protests. "Go to sleep, and stop blabbering for a bit, you scrawny brat. Give my ears a rest. I'll cover you with the cloak-it'll be safe enough."
Ginny rested her head thankfully against his hard shoulder and relaxed as he tugged the cloak over her head so that she disappeared fully.
Draco lay awake for a long time despite his exhaustion. He felt as if he was standing at a crossroads, and he was unsure which direction to take.
He listened to Ginny's even breathing, unbelieving that she was actually there-just that morning he'd been thinking of ways to make her absolutely miserable.
Draco closed his eyes and wondered what briefly what had happened to Pansy. It was unfortunate, really, that she hadn't been found dead alongside his Father. It'd have saved him the trouble of strangling her when he next saw the conniving, scheming, evil little wench.
Ginny stirred against his shoulder and he opened his eyes-he saw her small fingers peek out from the edge of the cloak and curl against his bare stomach.
Draco felt his lips twist as his body reacted, and he almost felt sorry for the little Weasley-she had no idea what she was in for if she made the mistake of truly falling for him. He'd surely take advantage of her any way he could, and when he got bored of her, he'd kick her to the side like unwanted trash.
He was after all, his Father's son.
Ginny woke early and crept from Draco's bedside feeling unbearably guilty. She couldn't bring herself to look at him as she left.
She left the cloak on Harry's trunk, uncaring anymore if anyone knew she'd taken it, and went to her own bed, crawling into it and pulling the covers over her head.
Clamping her aching, tired eyes shut, she burrowed into her pillow, and allowed sleep to overtake her, eager to escape her troubles for a even a little while longer.
The school was buzzing with the rumors of the past night-Ginny found herself being bombarded from all sides, and was reminded disturbingly of her days following the incident in the Chamber of Secrets.
She didn't see Draco all day Sunday, and she assumed he was still in the Infirmary. She felt guilty for not going to visit him, but she also felt guilty for thinking about it.
On Monday, it was classes, as usual-Draco had still not returned. She continued to avoid contact with everyone, including Harry, Ron, and even Hermione. She was afraid of the questions they would ask-she still didn't know how she would begin to answer them.
Tuesday brought no end to her troubles-nor did Wednesday or Thursday-and Ron managed to pin her down after dinner on Friday, making her absolutely miserable. He commenced bugging her unto Death about her 'relationship' with Malfoy-Ginny just withdrew farther into herself, refusing to speak until, with a worried frown, he finally left her alone.
Later that evening, she was making her way back up the path to the castle from a much needed visit to Hagrid's hut-she'd taken to visiting him every few days, and it had become a comforting habit, sitting in the overly large furniture, listening to him talk about utter nonsense in his gruff voice, and drinking the too strong tea he brewed.
He hadn't said a word about what had happened the week before, and she was greatly appreciative of it.
She felt much better as she made her way up the stone path, feeling gravel crunching under her feet.
As Ginny neared the torch-lit steps leading into the entrance hall, she heard steps behind her, and turned, thinking it was Hagrid-instead she saw the twisted expression of Pansy Parkinson-and the world went dark before a scream of alarm could escape her lips.
Draco looked up boredly as Ron Weasley stormed into the Infirmary early Saturday morning, with Potter and Granger close behind.
"Hurt yourself again, Weasley? Really, you should try to be more careful- the medical care here isn't free, you know. Haven't you got any respect for your impoverished parents?"
He watched the boy step forward and he grabbed the throat of his pajamas. "What did you do to her, you stinking Death Eater?"
Draco narrowed his eyes. "What are you talking about?"
"Ginny's gone. Don't tell me you don't know where she is!" Ron's eyes burned fiercely in his reddening face. "If you've hurt her, I'll kill you, slow-"
Draco bared his teeth and tore his hands from his throat. "I don't know what you're on about, Weasley-are you telling me she's missing?"
"As if you didn't know!" Ron trembled with his fury, his hands clenched into fists at his sides.
"I haven't seen her in days, you stupid sot." Draco threw back the sheets, and stood, clutching his bruised side. "Between the three of you, couldn't you keep her safe, you pathetic fool? I suppose watching over one small girl was too troublesome for the Gryffindor Dream Team?"
Ron watched grouchily as he went behind a screen to dress. "What the hell are you doing, Malfoy?"
"I'm going to go find her, you useless prat." Draco emerged, clothed, pulling on his black robes.
"You aren't going anywhere near her," Ron said angrily, standing in front of him.
"Out of my way, Weasley-If Voldemort has got her, she doesn't have much time."
"You don't get it, do you? I do not believe that you're concerned about her one little bit. You may have been able to convince everyone else that you didn't want the bloody Mark, but you can't fool me! None of this would have happened if it hadn't been for you! You're the reason he took her!"
Harry seemed to agree with Ron.
"Oh give over, Malfoy-You really expect us to believe that after all these years, you're suddenly suffering from quixotic impulses?"
"What?" Draco looked at him-what was the prat going on about?
"Nothing-it's a Muggle thing." Harry sighed, shaking his head. He looked at Draco appraisingly. "I really don't trust you, Malfoy. You've seen Voldemort and your father's work now." Harry looked at him, his eyes hard. "Where do your loyalties lay? What do you think, now?"
Draco clenched his teeth and ignored him. "Do you want her to die?"
Ron just glared at him.
"Just stand here and keep blaming everyone else for everything wrong in your life, Weasley-I'm going to go find her." With a feral sneer, Draco turned and strode out of the Infirmary doors, ignoring the sudden appearance of Madam Pomfrey, and her shouts of protest.
He was an hour down the trail in the Forbidden Forest when a breathless Ron. Harry, and Hermione caught him up, none of them saying a single word.
A week later, Ginny had still not been found. That day they'd been all through Hogsmeade, and all around the surrounding area-They'd been ordered back to the school and told that the Aurors from the Ministry would be taking over the search.
He'd been very nearly interrogated by the Wizard's sent from the Ministry to make enquiries-thankfully, they'd taken his word when he said he'd known nothing about it-because he'd been backed by Dumbledore himself.
Draco had left the school to help attend to his late father's affairs, and to comfort his grieving Mother. He remained at the family home for several weeks, trying unsuccessfully to hunt down any of his Father's contacts, searching tirelessly through papers and his father's secret rooms and chambers for clues-but to no avail. His mother took to staying in her private suite, and he let her-looking on her reminded him of his father.
He never stopped looking for Ginny, and from the letters and notes he'd been sent by Owl Post, neither had her brother or her friends.
The Christmas break came, and to his surprise, the three showed up on his doorstep. They made plans to renew the search again, and question everyone for miles mercilessly-and, surprise, surprise, Potter had come up with a little information from an anonymous source, on where Voldemort might be hiding out.
He had the House Elves show the trio to rooms in the cavernous manor, and retreated, because looking on them made him aware of just how much he missed Ginny.
Draco ended the evening, as he had of late, sitting in his father's library, drinking himself into oblivion. He was very nearly there when the troublesome Granger wandered in with a look of disbelief.
"What are you doing?"
"Just experimenting with a little bit of destruction," he drawled, lifting his glass in a drunken sort of salute.
The bushy haired girl came further into the room, still gaping. "You're sixteen years old! You can't drink!"
Draco felt a brow raise, and took a very long, slow, very deliberate drink from his glass. "Oh, horror, I'm breaking a rule."
"You obviously have rules of your own," the girl sighed, taking a seat nearby.
"Hmmm," Draco agreed blearily.
"Don't you think you've had enough?" She watched him doubtfully.
"Not nearly, my dear Granger…not nearly enough. I can still remember her face."
"How can you speak of her as if you care about her? Don't you have any sense of honor?"
"I have mounds of honor, Granger, bloody heaps of it," he chuckled derisively. "Malfoy honor."
"Truly? And what man honors himself to fight a girl?"
Draco looked at her coldly. "What are you blathering on about?"
"I know about the duel-I know you actually intended on dueling with her-a girl!"
"Whatever happened or didn't happen between us is none of your business, Granger."
"She's just a girl-she didn't know what she was doing when she challenged you," she protested.
"Just a girl?" Draco snorted. "I'll have you know, that girl near cracked my shin, jabbed out my eye, and locked me in a shower stall in freezing water and left me all bloody night long. Tell me I shouldn't have wanted payback."
Draco got up and unsteadily poured himself another finger of whiskey. He remembered the color of Ginny's eyes, and shrugged, filling the glass to its brim.
Hermione watched the tall boy disapprovingly as he flung himself uncaringly onto a velvet settee.
"Do you love her?"
He looked at her from his slumped, careless position and smirked. "Me? Love a Weasley? Of course not."
"Does she love you?"
"Surely. What's not to love? I've got looks, money, influence…and a lovely outlook on life." He smirked again, and closed his eyes. "To tell the truth- which I am certainly not known for-I think she really does. I pity her."
"Why do you think she loves you?" Hermione pressed.
"Hell, Granger, I don't know!" He looked over at her in pure frustration, his eyes red-rimmed. "Why do you love Weasley? Why do the stars shine? Why does God suffer Voldemort to live?"
"Calm down," Hermione sighed, rubbing her own eyes tiredly.
Draco took a deep breath. "I lied, you know."
"Big surprise," Hermione muttered lowly. "What did you lie about?"
"I do love her-I think. I care about her, amazingly enough. I guess that's the real reason I pity her." She watched as he took another gulp. "Weasley was probably right, you now-all of this is my fault. Ginny would be safe now, if it hadn't been for me." He stared into the glass as he rested it on his chest. "Maybe I should just leave-move away, go to school someplace else, when we find her."
Hermione noticed he said 'when' and not 'if'. 'When'.
"Maybe you should let Ginny make her own judgment about you before you decide to just go," Hermione said grudgingly. She had never seen Draco Malfoy concerned about anyone besides himself.
Draco took a long drink of his late father's whiskey, ignoring Hermione's look of censure, and lounged back on the antique velvet settee, eyes half lidded and bloodshot.
"No…that's one thing about women," he muttered, slightly slurring his words together as he drawled. "They don't realize their mistakes until after they've made them; they never do. Look at my Mother." He laughed derisively and took another drink. "Listen to me being all bloody noble, when what I really want to do is-"
Hermione cut him off. "I don't want to hear it-in case you haven't noticed, I am a woman-suffice it to say, I know a bit more about these matters than you. I think Ginny would be-upset-if you just left."
Draco sighed.
She heard his glass fall from his hand and roll, empty across the carpet, and she looked over, realizing he had fallen asleep. She got up from her seat and walked across the room to him, noticing with no little surprise how vulnerable he looked as he slept-and how very unhappy.
His usually neatly combed-back hair tumbled messily across his brow, and his expensive clothes were stained and rumpled. She took in the Dark Mark seared into the sensitive skin of his inner forearm, revealed by his rolled up shirtsleeves, and shivered despite herself. She had come to respect him, grudgingly over the past few weeks, but she sensed darkness in him, and it frightened her. She couldn't trust him, and it made her extremely nervous…
TBC
(Review, Review! Please? P.S. For those of you wondering about the whole, 'Last Hogsmeade Weekend of the year' thing? I meant the year, literally- before Christmas, New years, and all I mean! ^-^)