Author's Notes: Me again! What can I say? I love them…and well, I do angst really well. My poor readers. Ok, just like always…these characters belong to ABC and General Hospital. I don't own them, I was just borrowing them. I'll give them back if you ask nicely.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Are you okay?" he asked.
Elizabeth stopped on the steps of the Elm Street pier and sighed heavily. Jason told her again how dangerous it was to be around him and how she needed to stay away. And she, wanting to hold onto an ounce of self-respect, had turned to walk away. Before he could. Again.
But his voice had stopped her. It was sincere and honest as he asked about her well-being. Elizabeth promised herself she wouldn't cry for him anymore. But she had to amend that – she wouldn't cry in front of him. She'd spent so much of her time crying—for Lucky, for Jason, for herself. And just when she thought she was all cried out, the seemingly endless well of tears would open up again.
God, she hated that word. Again. Lucky promised he'd love her, again. Jason said she couldn't see him again. And she – she found herself in the same mess. Again.
Everything in her wanted to turn around and tell him she wasn't okay – wasn't sure she'd ever be okay again. Her mouth twisted with bitterness as the word ran through her mind.
Again. Again. Again.
"Elizabeth?"
She could hear the concern in his voice – and could almost convince herself it was genuine. Elizabeth would have believed if it he hadn't just insisted they could no longer know each other. Her hand tightened on the metal handrail before she turned to face him.
"I'm fine," she lied. At one time Elizabeth Webber had been a damn fine actress. With her parents, her friends, with just about anyone. Then Lucky happened. The dear, sweet Lucky Spencer she'd fought so desperately to hold onto – only to lose him again. "You've made your point, Jason. You're dangerous, I think it's a joke, we can't be friends, I get it. You don't have to tell me over and over again."
They stood there for a long moment, their eyes telling each other the truth their souls hid. Finally, when he didn't say anything, she turned to walk away.
"Are you okay?" he asked, again.
This time she'd actually reached the top step, preparing to return to Kelly's. When he'd asked her to come for a walk with him, Elizabeth had dropped everything at the chance. He'd held out his hand, just like that night so long ago, but this time she didn't hesitate in taking it. "Do you want to know the truth?" she asked, not turning around.
"Of course I do. I never want you to feel like you have to lie to me." Jason took a step towards her, but then stopped. "Elizabeth, are you okay?"
"No," she whispered. It was more to herself than him. After the first tear fell, she couldn't stop them. "I – uh – I haven't been okay since I left the hospital. Since the day you promised me you'd never bail on me – all you've done is break that promise. I just can't do it anymore, Jason."
She didn't hear him move, his heavy motorcycle boots on the wood pier, or his low curses directed towards himself, all she knew was one second she had been falling, and then Jason was there to catch her. "Easy," he whispered. Jason wrapped an arm around her waist and directed her towards the wooden bench. The same bench he'd first told her goodbye on. Back when things had been so simple for them. When being 'more than friends' was something that they both understood.
"I don't understand, Jason," she sniffled. Elizabeth let him support her, suddenly finding herself without any energy. "Why can't we be friends?"
"Elizabeth…" he sighed. Jason ran his free hand over his face, trying to prepare himself for another conversation like this. "It's dangerous–"
"I'll agree to the guard," Elizabeth cut in. "I won't argue, I won't try to ditch him, Jason. I promise. I'll listen to whatever you say, I'll do whatever you want. Just…I can't do it, Jason. I don't know how to not be your friend."
"Elizabeth, you can walk away from this, but I never can. Not in five years, not in ten years… but you can walk out while you're still safe." He turned to face her and cupped her chin in his hand, wiped a salty tear away. "While you're still alive."
It was the same spiel, again. She wished he'd at least come up with a new speech to give her, something that at least made it interesting. "What if it's a risk I want to take?"
"I won't."
"We've had this conversation before, Jason. Outside of Kelly's, years ago. That didn't stop Sorel from coming after me, so why do you think it's gonna stop Alcazar?" Elizabeth numbly wiped away any remaining tears and looked up at him. "These people—your enemies, they get that I mean something to you. Why do you think they kidnapped me, Jason? It wasn't because of Lucky, it wasn't because of Zander… it was because of you."
"And you wonder why I'm trying to stay away?" he questioned. "You've been kidnapped and you've been shot. Because of me, Elizabeth. Yes, you mean something to me. But you can't, not anymore."
"So that's it?" she asked, angrily. "Do you just have some switch inside of you that you can turn off? Are you really the borg people say you are?"
"Damn it, Elizabeth…"
"You know what, Jason?" Elizabeth stood and pulled the light sweater around herself tighter. "I can't do this right now. I've walked out on my job, again, so I can listen to you tell me how much our friendship doesn't mean to you. I'm sorry, but I'm just not doing it right now."
"Elizabeth!" Jason yelled, but this time she didn't stop on the steps. She didn't even look back as she left him sitting there, his face in his hands.
~*~
Three Days Later…
Elizabeth looked up when the bell above Kelly's jingled to find Jason standing there, staring at her. She hadn't seen or heard from him since the night she left him on the docks. And frankly, she didn't want to. "Courtney, I'm taking my break, could you cover my tables?" she called back to the kitchen.
"Sure, no problem," Courtney answered her. The blonde came out, a tray held high above her head. She saw that Jason had just seated himself in Elizabeth's section. "Are you sure you don't want to take that one?"
"Positive." Elizabeth pulled the apron off and grabbed her purse, heading out through the kitchen. Once she got to the back steps, Elizabeth pulled a pack of cigarettes from her purse, along with a lighter and settled in for a smoke. It was a nervous habit she'd picked up weeks ago, after she and Zander had been shot at in the hospital. They'd gone to Sonny who had whisked Zander away to a safe house, but did nothing to protect her. Of course, it seemed that Alcazar had lost interest. Hell, maybe he really did believe she didn't mean anything to Jason.
She heard the heavy motorcycle boots crunch on the gravel, announcing his presence. Elizabeth blew a smoke ring into the air before she sighed. Stubbing the half-smoked cigarette out, she fished another out of the pack. "If you're here to tell me about the danger, just save your breath. I get it, okay? Now, please, just leave me alone."
As if she hadn't said anything at all, Jason commented, "You don't smoke."
"I do now." Elizabeth took a drag off the cigarette and exhaled slowly. "Seems I have lots of extra time on my hands. And well…since you won't risk me being shot at, I have to figure out some other way to kill myself." "Elizabeth–" Jason began. His voice was sharp, and she knew she was in for a lecture.
"Jason?" she questioned, before he could say anymore. "Would you please just…stuff it."
He couldn't help himself and he laughed. Things had been so tense lately with Sonny because he had helped AJ, and also because of Alcazar, he couldn't remember the last time he'd let off any stress at all. When he tried to ride, all he could concentrate on was why Elizabeth wasn't behind him, yelling into the window, urging him to go faster. "I'm sorry," he apologized, "it's just, you sounded exactly like my grandmother when you said that."
Elizabeth took another drag from the cigarette and slowly expelled the smoke from her lungs. "Jason, if you don't have anything to say, just please leave." She dropped the cigarette on the cement step and rubbed it out with her boot. "I told you a few days ago, I can't do this anymore. I don't want to hear about your grandmother, and I don't want to hear about all of these things you think you need to tell me. Because when you're finished telling them to me," she looked up to meet his eyes, "When you're finished kissing me breathless, you'll tell me once again how we can't be friends…how it's too dangerous. And frankly, I'm just tired of hearing it. So just shut the fuck up."
"Elizabeth…"
"Why are you here, Jason?" she questioned. Elizabeth put her hands on her thighs and pushed herself up. From the step, she had the height advantage over him. "You know I work here. You know I spend my time here. But still, you come. You say it's for the coffee, but newsflash Jason: the coffee's not that good. And in case you've forgotten, you own half of a coffee warehouse."
"Damn it, woman, would you just let me explain?"
"No," she cut in crisply, "I won't. I'm tired of hearing your damn explanations. Once, a long time ago, I tried to tell you to stay away because of Lucky and you said, you know the thing is, mostly you came to me. I, being my usual self, insisted that you take me back, and being selfish, I asked for the cliff road. But you know what Jason? You've been the one telling me to stay away, and I've been listening, but I can't listen when you show up every other minute where I work, wanting a cheeseburger or a cup of coffee, or just walking by, checking up on me."
Jason cocked his head to the side to study her. "How do you remember that? It's been over a year, and that was one of the worst times in your life… but you remember."
Elizabeth's smile was sad. "I remember everything you say to me. It's my curse."
"Curse?"
"I used to think of it as a blessing. When you weren't here, I could think back on all the good times we had together, and it would make me happy. And now…now all it does it make me sad."
"Why are you making this so difficult?" Jason asked. He took a step towards her, holding out his hand, but he let it drop before she could take it.
"I'm making it difficult?" Elizabeth repeated. "Me? No, no. You are the one who keeps showing up here, you are the one who can't stay away, not me Jason."
He took another step forward and this time he did reach out to touch her. He slid his hand through her hair, lifting it away from her face. "Don't you even wonder why?" His voice was hoarse as he fought off the emotions threatening to overwhelm him. "Have you even stopped to think why I can't stay away from you Elizabeth? Even though I know it's dangerous, and I know I should just let you live your life…I can't walk away." Jason brought his other hand up to frame her face. "It's because you're important to me. It's because I lo…"
Not willing to hear his admission, Elizabeth quickly reached up and pulled his face to hers. Their lips met, as Jason allowed her to take control of the kiss. It was gentle as she probed his mouth with her tongue, learning him well. Jason could feel the passion rise up in him, just like every time they touched. Finally, when he was sure he'd explode, she pulled back.
Reaching up, she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. Her eyes were pained when she looked at him. "Go home, Jason. Go back to Sonny and Carly and your empty penthouse. My break's over."
And she turned and walked away.
