Chapter 11
The Work of a Slytherin
*
"Okay, class. Put your left hand over the broom, and say 'Up'." "Up," chorused the class. Several broomsticks jumped into the air. Rachel, however, was grinning idiotically, and saying, "Up, boy! Come on! Who wants the cookie?" Oliver frowned. "Up," scowled Rachel, sullenly. The broom jumped into her hand. "Hee, hee! Look at the broomstick!" laughed Michelle, in delight. "It jumps!" "The bouncing broomstick," muttered Rachel, darkly. For her, the lesson was ruined. "Now, when I say, you swing one leg over the broomstick, and kick off. One, two, three!" A figure burst from the line of students, crashing into a tree. "You stupid female!" shrieked Draco, from his perch in the oak. "I'll get you for that!" "Then I'll get you back!" snapped Rachel. In her anger, she had kicked the nearest broomstick. And it just happened to be Draco's. "Now, class," smiled Oliver, dreamily. "Calm down." "Deduct house points!" howled Draco. "Give her detention!" "Five points from Slytherin, then," said Oliver. "What?" "I'm in your house, jackass," said Rachel. Artemis grinned. After an encounter with the idiotic blonde boy, in the corridor, he no longer liked him. With a regretful sigh and wave of his wand, Oliver brought Draco back to earth with a thump. "Oof," wheezed Draco. Michelle grinned, moving towards him, and looking not at all friendly. "Never kick a man when he's down," said Artemis, gallantly. Michelle stopped. Draco grinned at him, gratefully. "But this is just a boy, so go on," continued Artemis, with a vampire-like grin. Then, before Oliver could stop her, Michelle had picked up her broom and dealt the boy a heavy blow over the back of his head with it. His blonde head dropped, and he fell, unconscious. "Oops, these brooms are heavy," remarked Oliver. "I suppose we'll have to send him up to Madam Pomfrey's." "I'll take him," said Michelle, a manic grin spreading across her face. "I'll take him," snapped Pansy, grabbing hold of his shoulders and trying, unsuccessfully, to pull him up. "Someone go with her. You, girl. Come and help this girl carry Draco up to Madam Pomfrey's," said Oliver, snapping his fingers at a rather short girl, with a familiar face. "Leanne?" said Rachel. Her friend suddenly saw her and waved. "Oh, hi, Rachel. You're here, too?" asked Leanne. Then, turning, she began dragging Draco across the field with Pansy. "Right, class. Let's start again," said Oliver, nodding in satisfaction as the unconscious boy's clothes became splattered with mud. Over the next two hours, Oliver proceeded to teach the students how to mount a broomstick, fly with a broomstick, etc, etc. "This is all exercise," sighed Artemis, his eyes shut. "This is stupid," said Rachel, hovering near the roof. "What's wrong with you?" asked Michelle, flying neatly beside Artemis. "I dislike heights," snapped Artemis. "Unlike other people, I don't have my head in the clouds all the time." "No, it's your nose in the air," said Rachel, ignoring the queasy feeling in her stomach as she glanced at the ground. She heaved a sigh. "I hate this," she said in a small voice. "How are you going, girls?" beamed Oliver, sliding to a smooth halt beside the group. "Excuse me, but if you didn't happen to notice, I am not a girl," hissed Artemis, icily. "And you're the only one with manicured fingernails," muttered Rachel. She flopped her hand out in front of her, both hands letting go of the broom to strike a pose. "Gosh. My nails. They're like so perfect. I mean like, yeah, totally." Artemis did not look amused. "I appreciate the finer things in life," he sniffed, haughtily. "Such as caviar, homework, and maths," said Rachel. Sensing tension in the air, Oliver quickly said, "Well, the Slytherin team is in need of new fliers, so would any of you like to join?" "Me!" cried Michelle, excitedly. "Oh, pick me! Pick me!" "Well you're a good enough flier," shrugged Oliver. "Yay!" squeaked Michelle, bouncing off her broom in her joy. She fell, sticking a hand up just in time to grab the handle of her broom. But the smile on her face did not go away. "Yay! I love flying!" Rachel longed to bring her fist down on the bony fingers that circled Michelle's broom. However, Oliver seemed quite shocked. "My, you are an apt flier!" he exclaimed. "I am?" asked Michelle, looking quite delighted, even though she was hanging perilously, 50 feet above the ground, from an enchanted piece of wood and twigs, which could give way any minute. "Yes. Would you two like to join?" Oliver turned to the other two, who were staring up into the sky. "Fears are made to be overcome," said Artemis, bravely. "Yes, I shall do it! I shall join the Quidditch team!" then he paused. "What is Quidditch?" "I won't tell you completely, but it involves two psycho flying objects, which do their best to hit you in the head and knock you off your broom, a big, red object, which you have to throw through hoops, and a golden, miniature object, which a certain person has to catch," muttered Rachel, darkly. The boy's face went an interesting green. "What?" he croaked. Rachel laughed. With a face and voice like that, Artemis Fowl 2, the great criminal mastermind, had gone from being a smooth, composed vampire, to Kermit the Frog. "Good, you'll be the Seeker, and.?" Oliver glanced at Rachel. "Oh.alright," said Rachel. "If I can survive netball, I can survive freaking Quidditch." "Netball?" "Never mind."
The Gryffindors & Ravenclaw 9:30 The Dungeon
"Tell me, Miss Granger, what would I get if I added Dragon's Teeth to Basilisk Fangs?" Snape's oily voice slid through the dungeon like grease. "Nothing," beamed Hermione. "The Basilisk's Fangs would make the Dragon's Teeth useless, because they're both poisonous." "Correct," said Snape, sulkily. Then he noticed a hand waving in the air. "Are you drowning, Miss Tan?" he asked. "She had enough of getting tanned, so she went in the water and got herself drowned," giggled Victoria. Angeline gave her a haughty look. "No, I am not drowning. I do not, however, agree with the logics in this. I believe that." Angeline's voice droned on.and on.and on.and on.until everyone in the dungeon was snoring. When she had finally finished, Angeline looked around in surprise at her slumbering classmates. "What?" she asked. "We haven't gone back to pre-school, with afternoon naps, have we?" Snape lay crumpled on the ground, fast asleep, snoring like a bulldozer. (Geddit? Bulldozer? Sorry) "Because that wouldn't be correct. It is only nine thirty, and you should really wait till twelve thirty, or so, because it is an afternoon nap." "Yes, because it cannot be twelve, since it is afternoon," nodded Vanessa, who was the only student who had stayed conscious through Angeline's lecture. There was a thump as Harry's head hit his desk.
All four Houses 12:00 The Dining Hall
"I hate sandwiches," Rachel glowered at her plate. "When did you come?" Angeline looked at all her other friends, who had just arrived. "Well, we were all crowding around Alex's computer, and then this weird ad came on. Then she pressed Enter, and the next thing you know, we were all here, and Dumbledore was Sorting us," explained Katie. "What Houses did you get into?" Rachel crossed her fingers, hoping one of them would get in Slytherin. If she had to live through one more minute of Michelle's facts on Quidditch or Artemis's theories on life, she would crack. "Susie and I got in Gryffindor, Alex got in Ravenclaw, and Leanne got in Hufflepuff," said Katie. Rachel sighed. First flying, then pus, then sandwiches, and now this. "Hooray! We're all in Gryffindor, too!" cried Sarah, delightedly. She grabbed Susie's hand and proceeded to tell the blonde all about what had happened since they got there, with Loui and Amelia adding a few bits. Christina just sat and gazed at Harry. "Christina! I reckon you should get a telescope, or you'll ruin your eyes, straining them to see Harry," advised Rachel. "Yeah, Harry's a real eyesore," giggled Victoria. Christina glared at the two of them, sticking her tongue out. "You're all just jealous." "Jealous?" Rachel lifted an eyebrow. "Pray, enlighten me." "Harry likes me and none of you!" crowed Christina. From down the table, there was a sudden screeching of chair legs on the ground, then the patter of feet, fading in the direction of the door. "Mm hmm," nodded Rachel. "Yup. Sure, Christina. Sure." "It's true!" screamed Christina, hitting her sandwich with her fist. Peanut butter squirted out onto her hand. "It's true, so there!" She stuck her tongue out at the other girls. "If Harry likes her, he must love all of us," Rachel muttered to Victoria. The girl snorted, covering her mouth as food sprayed out all over Artemis. "Oops. Hee, hee. Sorry," she laughed. "Vicky, you're disgusting," groaned Rachel, moving away from the girl. "Look who's talking," said Michelle. "Aw, shuddup. You're not part of this conversation," snapped Rachel. Michelle looked hurt; then angry. "You sure wanna die, don't you?" she growled, hands tightening around her knife. "Michelle, don't be so immature," sighed Leanne. "I agree," nodded Angeline, sitting up straight and placing her hands primly in her lap. Apparently, Oliver had just glanced in her direction. "Lovesick idiots," muttered Rachel. "I am not smitten!" screeched Christina. "I didn't say smitten, you stupid idiot. I said 'lovesick idiots'," Rachel rolled her eyes. "Stupid idiot?" asked Elspeth. "Man, are you retarded or something? S-t-u-p-i-d i-d-i-o-t," spelled Rachel. "No, I am not retarded, thank you very much," sniffed Elspeth, getting angry. "I am quite intelligent." "Unfortunately, not intelligent enough to understand a conversation in your own language," muttered Rachel, under her breath. "You shouldn't be so mean," said Stephanie. "She's new." "So are we." There was a sudden gasp from Artemis, as he delicately bit into his sandwich. Rachel gave a mimicking gasp. "Oh no!" she cried. "It's a sandwich! Commoner's food! I shall die of food poisoning!" "I wish you would," said Michelle. Everyone laughed. "Will you just shut the fuck up?" sighed Rachel. Michelle gaped at her. "Rachel!" admonished Angeline, her eyes wide with shock. There was a long silence. Quietly, Amelia sneaked a sandwich from Rachel's untouched plate. "Mm.beetroot," she said, happily. "I loooove beetroot." Louisa took the remaining sandwich, opening it, and finding with glee that it too was filled with beetroot. "Yum," she grinned, biting into it. Rachel glanced down at her plate and found it was empty. "I hate sandwiches," she muttered. "And I hate beetroot." "Don't they have caviar?" asked Artemis, wrinkling his nose at the taste of jam. "This is far too sweet for my liking." "Yuck," said Michelle, glaring at her sandwich. "This tastes disgusting. I'm gonna kill it." Throwing the sandwich back down onto her plate, she plunged her knife into it. Suddenly, her face froze. "Ooh.my leg," she said. "What?" asked Victoria. "Did you like, stick the knife down so hard that it went through the sandwich, plate, table, and into your leg?" She laughed. Michelle nodded, her face white. "Id," snorted Christina. Artemis laughed. "Surely you don't mean it?" "I do," squeaked Michelle. "Oh you're such an idiot, Michelle," exclaimed Angeline. Suddenly, a shadow fell over them all. "Miss Tan, I'm shocked. Your friend is injured and the only sympathy you hold for her is an insult?" said Oliver, looking quite disgusted. "That is disgraceful." Angeline's face was an interesting grey. "And who are you to." she gaped at the Student teacher. "To what? To tell you that it is not good kick a man when he's down?" Oliver frowned. "Really." "I.I." stammered Angeline. For once in her life, she finally had nothing to say. Pity Leanne didn't feel the same way. "Oh, hi!" she said, loudly. "I know you! You're Oliver Wood." Katie seemed just as stricken as Angeline was, and the two of them stared at Oliver as thought he had sprouted an extra twenty heads. "Yes, how did you know? Ah yes. You learnt flying today, with Slytherin, didn't you?" beamed Oliver. "Yes, and you helped that annoying little brat, Draco, across the field. Good. Well, since you're so good at helping people- --" Rachel choked, clapping her hand over her mouth as she struggled to swallow her pumpkin juice. It may have been because the pumpkin juice tasted like Heinz, Baby Food, and it may have also been because Leanne was well-known for not helping people. A huge grin on her small face, Victoria sniggered behind her hand, helplessly. Stephanie disappeared under the table, where hysterical laughter suddenly sounded, so loud that the table began to shake, causing Michelle great agony as the knife twisted in her leg. "Stop, it, Stephanie!" she shrieked, between peals of laughter. Christina was snorting, highly unladylike laughter exploding from her mouth. Angeline and Katie did their best to laugh elegantly, behind their hands. "That is so not true," laughed Angeline, placing a hand on Oliver's arm. "Trust me. It's so not true that it's not funny." Rachel's eyes went crossed. "What the?" she asked. "But it is funny. That's why we're all laughing." "Ow! Stephanie!" yelped Michelle, trying, unsuccessfully, to yank the knife out of the vibrating table. "I have never met a group of more cold-hearted females in my life!" exclaimed Oliver, horrified. "How 'bout when Katie Bell dumped you?" asked Rachel, innocently. The man's face twisted in agony, as he remembered his ex girlfriend. "You cruel child!" he sobbed, taking off, and blowing his nose loudly in a handkerchief. "What?" grinned Rachel. "All I said was.Katie Bell!" "Ugh! You're so mean," Angeline slapped her arm. "Yeah," Katie's handprint was added to Rachel's suffering limb. "You're not in Slytherin?" Rachel raised her eyebrows. "And you hit people more often than Michelle." "Shut up, Rachel," groaned Michelle.
*
Haha! Only our first day, and I have managed to kick someone into a tree, Angeline has managed to bore her class to sleep, (what's new?) Michelle has stabbed herself with a butter knife, and I have brought back painful memories for Oliver Wood. Enough chaos for one chapter? You just wait. And review, in the mean-time. Pleaz.
The Work of a Slytherin
*
"Okay, class. Put your left hand over the broom, and say 'Up'." "Up," chorused the class. Several broomsticks jumped into the air. Rachel, however, was grinning idiotically, and saying, "Up, boy! Come on! Who wants the cookie?" Oliver frowned. "Up," scowled Rachel, sullenly. The broom jumped into her hand. "Hee, hee! Look at the broomstick!" laughed Michelle, in delight. "It jumps!" "The bouncing broomstick," muttered Rachel, darkly. For her, the lesson was ruined. "Now, when I say, you swing one leg over the broomstick, and kick off. One, two, three!" A figure burst from the line of students, crashing into a tree. "You stupid female!" shrieked Draco, from his perch in the oak. "I'll get you for that!" "Then I'll get you back!" snapped Rachel. In her anger, she had kicked the nearest broomstick. And it just happened to be Draco's. "Now, class," smiled Oliver, dreamily. "Calm down." "Deduct house points!" howled Draco. "Give her detention!" "Five points from Slytherin, then," said Oliver. "What?" "I'm in your house, jackass," said Rachel. Artemis grinned. After an encounter with the idiotic blonde boy, in the corridor, he no longer liked him. With a regretful sigh and wave of his wand, Oliver brought Draco back to earth with a thump. "Oof," wheezed Draco. Michelle grinned, moving towards him, and looking not at all friendly. "Never kick a man when he's down," said Artemis, gallantly. Michelle stopped. Draco grinned at him, gratefully. "But this is just a boy, so go on," continued Artemis, with a vampire-like grin. Then, before Oliver could stop her, Michelle had picked up her broom and dealt the boy a heavy blow over the back of his head with it. His blonde head dropped, and he fell, unconscious. "Oops, these brooms are heavy," remarked Oliver. "I suppose we'll have to send him up to Madam Pomfrey's." "I'll take him," said Michelle, a manic grin spreading across her face. "I'll take him," snapped Pansy, grabbing hold of his shoulders and trying, unsuccessfully, to pull him up. "Someone go with her. You, girl. Come and help this girl carry Draco up to Madam Pomfrey's," said Oliver, snapping his fingers at a rather short girl, with a familiar face. "Leanne?" said Rachel. Her friend suddenly saw her and waved. "Oh, hi, Rachel. You're here, too?" asked Leanne. Then, turning, she began dragging Draco across the field with Pansy. "Right, class. Let's start again," said Oliver, nodding in satisfaction as the unconscious boy's clothes became splattered with mud. Over the next two hours, Oliver proceeded to teach the students how to mount a broomstick, fly with a broomstick, etc, etc. "This is all exercise," sighed Artemis, his eyes shut. "This is stupid," said Rachel, hovering near the roof. "What's wrong with you?" asked Michelle, flying neatly beside Artemis. "I dislike heights," snapped Artemis. "Unlike other people, I don't have my head in the clouds all the time." "No, it's your nose in the air," said Rachel, ignoring the queasy feeling in her stomach as she glanced at the ground. She heaved a sigh. "I hate this," she said in a small voice. "How are you going, girls?" beamed Oliver, sliding to a smooth halt beside the group. "Excuse me, but if you didn't happen to notice, I am not a girl," hissed Artemis, icily. "And you're the only one with manicured fingernails," muttered Rachel. She flopped her hand out in front of her, both hands letting go of the broom to strike a pose. "Gosh. My nails. They're like so perfect. I mean like, yeah, totally." Artemis did not look amused. "I appreciate the finer things in life," he sniffed, haughtily. "Such as caviar, homework, and maths," said Rachel. Sensing tension in the air, Oliver quickly said, "Well, the Slytherin team is in need of new fliers, so would any of you like to join?" "Me!" cried Michelle, excitedly. "Oh, pick me! Pick me!" "Well you're a good enough flier," shrugged Oliver. "Yay!" squeaked Michelle, bouncing off her broom in her joy. She fell, sticking a hand up just in time to grab the handle of her broom. But the smile on her face did not go away. "Yay! I love flying!" Rachel longed to bring her fist down on the bony fingers that circled Michelle's broom. However, Oliver seemed quite shocked. "My, you are an apt flier!" he exclaimed. "I am?" asked Michelle, looking quite delighted, even though she was hanging perilously, 50 feet above the ground, from an enchanted piece of wood and twigs, which could give way any minute. "Yes. Would you two like to join?" Oliver turned to the other two, who were staring up into the sky. "Fears are made to be overcome," said Artemis, bravely. "Yes, I shall do it! I shall join the Quidditch team!" then he paused. "What is Quidditch?" "I won't tell you completely, but it involves two psycho flying objects, which do their best to hit you in the head and knock you off your broom, a big, red object, which you have to throw through hoops, and a golden, miniature object, which a certain person has to catch," muttered Rachel, darkly. The boy's face went an interesting green. "What?" he croaked. Rachel laughed. With a face and voice like that, Artemis Fowl 2, the great criminal mastermind, had gone from being a smooth, composed vampire, to Kermit the Frog. "Good, you'll be the Seeker, and.?" Oliver glanced at Rachel. "Oh.alright," said Rachel. "If I can survive netball, I can survive freaking Quidditch." "Netball?" "Never mind."
The Gryffindors & Ravenclaw 9:30 The Dungeon
"Tell me, Miss Granger, what would I get if I added Dragon's Teeth to Basilisk Fangs?" Snape's oily voice slid through the dungeon like grease. "Nothing," beamed Hermione. "The Basilisk's Fangs would make the Dragon's Teeth useless, because they're both poisonous." "Correct," said Snape, sulkily. Then he noticed a hand waving in the air. "Are you drowning, Miss Tan?" he asked. "She had enough of getting tanned, so she went in the water and got herself drowned," giggled Victoria. Angeline gave her a haughty look. "No, I am not drowning. I do not, however, agree with the logics in this. I believe that." Angeline's voice droned on.and on.and on.and on.until everyone in the dungeon was snoring. When she had finally finished, Angeline looked around in surprise at her slumbering classmates. "What?" she asked. "We haven't gone back to pre-school, with afternoon naps, have we?" Snape lay crumpled on the ground, fast asleep, snoring like a bulldozer. (Geddit? Bulldozer? Sorry) "Because that wouldn't be correct. It is only nine thirty, and you should really wait till twelve thirty, or so, because it is an afternoon nap." "Yes, because it cannot be twelve, since it is afternoon," nodded Vanessa, who was the only student who had stayed conscious through Angeline's lecture. There was a thump as Harry's head hit his desk.
All four Houses 12:00 The Dining Hall
"I hate sandwiches," Rachel glowered at her plate. "When did you come?" Angeline looked at all her other friends, who had just arrived. "Well, we were all crowding around Alex's computer, and then this weird ad came on. Then she pressed Enter, and the next thing you know, we were all here, and Dumbledore was Sorting us," explained Katie. "What Houses did you get into?" Rachel crossed her fingers, hoping one of them would get in Slytherin. If she had to live through one more minute of Michelle's facts on Quidditch or Artemis's theories on life, she would crack. "Susie and I got in Gryffindor, Alex got in Ravenclaw, and Leanne got in Hufflepuff," said Katie. Rachel sighed. First flying, then pus, then sandwiches, and now this. "Hooray! We're all in Gryffindor, too!" cried Sarah, delightedly. She grabbed Susie's hand and proceeded to tell the blonde all about what had happened since they got there, with Loui and Amelia adding a few bits. Christina just sat and gazed at Harry. "Christina! I reckon you should get a telescope, or you'll ruin your eyes, straining them to see Harry," advised Rachel. "Yeah, Harry's a real eyesore," giggled Victoria. Christina glared at the two of them, sticking her tongue out. "You're all just jealous." "Jealous?" Rachel lifted an eyebrow. "Pray, enlighten me." "Harry likes me and none of you!" crowed Christina. From down the table, there was a sudden screeching of chair legs on the ground, then the patter of feet, fading in the direction of the door. "Mm hmm," nodded Rachel. "Yup. Sure, Christina. Sure." "It's true!" screamed Christina, hitting her sandwich with her fist. Peanut butter squirted out onto her hand. "It's true, so there!" She stuck her tongue out at the other girls. "If Harry likes her, he must love all of us," Rachel muttered to Victoria. The girl snorted, covering her mouth as food sprayed out all over Artemis. "Oops. Hee, hee. Sorry," she laughed. "Vicky, you're disgusting," groaned Rachel, moving away from the girl. "Look who's talking," said Michelle. "Aw, shuddup. You're not part of this conversation," snapped Rachel. Michelle looked hurt; then angry. "You sure wanna die, don't you?" she growled, hands tightening around her knife. "Michelle, don't be so immature," sighed Leanne. "I agree," nodded Angeline, sitting up straight and placing her hands primly in her lap. Apparently, Oliver had just glanced in her direction. "Lovesick idiots," muttered Rachel. "I am not smitten!" screeched Christina. "I didn't say smitten, you stupid idiot. I said 'lovesick idiots'," Rachel rolled her eyes. "Stupid idiot?" asked Elspeth. "Man, are you retarded or something? S-t-u-p-i-d i-d-i-o-t," spelled Rachel. "No, I am not retarded, thank you very much," sniffed Elspeth, getting angry. "I am quite intelligent." "Unfortunately, not intelligent enough to understand a conversation in your own language," muttered Rachel, under her breath. "You shouldn't be so mean," said Stephanie. "She's new." "So are we." There was a sudden gasp from Artemis, as he delicately bit into his sandwich. Rachel gave a mimicking gasp. "Oh no!" she cried. "It's a sandwich! Commoner's food! I shall die of food poisoning!" "I wish you would," said Michelle. Everyone laughed. "Will you just shut the fuck up?" sighed Rachel. Michelle gaped at her. "Rachel!" admonished Angeline, her eyes wide with shock. There was a long silence. Quietly, Amelia sneaked a sandwich from Rachel's untouched plate. "Mm.beetroot," she said, happily. "I loooove beetroot." Louisa took the remaining sandwich, opening it, and finding with glee that it too was filled with beetroot. "Yum," she grinned, biting into it. Rachel glanced down at her plate and found it was empty. "I hate sandwiches," she muttered. "And I hate beetroot." "Don't they have caviar?" asked Artemis, wrinkling his nose at the taste of jam. "This is far too sweet for my liking." "Yuck," said Michelle, glaring at her sandwich. "This tastes disgusting. I'm gonna kill it." Throwing the sandwich back down onto her plate, she plunged her knife into it. Suddenly, her face froze. "Ooh.my leg," she said. "What?" asked Victoria. "Did you like, stick the knife down so hard that it went through the sandwich, plate, table, and into your leg?" She laughed. Michelle nodded, her face white. "Id," snorted Christina. Artemis laughed. "Surely you don't mean it?" "I do," squeaked Michelle. "Oh you're such an idiot, Michelle," exclaimed Angeline. Suddenly, a shadow fell over them all. "Miss Tan, I'm shocked. Your friend is injured and the only sympathy you hold for her is an insult?" said Oliver, looking quite disgusted. "That is disgraceful." Angeline's face was an interesting grey. "And who are you to." she gaped at the Student teacher. "To what? To tell you that it is not good kick a man when he's down?" Oliver frowned. "Really." "I.I." stammered Angeline. For once in her life, she finally had nothing to say. Pity Leanne didn't feel the same way. "Oh, hi!" she said, loudly. "I know you! You're Oliver Wood." Katie seemed just as stricken as Angeline was, and the two of them stared at Oliver as thought he had sprouted an extra twenty heads. "Yes, how did you know? Ah yes. You learnt flying today, with Slytherin, didn't you?" beamed Oliver. "Yes, and you helped that annoying little brat, Draco, across the field. Good. Well, since you're so good at helping people- --" Rachel choked, clapping her hand over her mouth as she struggled to swallow her pumpkin juice. It may have been because the pumpkin juice tasted like Heinz, Baby Food, and it may have also been because Leanne was well-known for not helping people. A huge grin on her small face, Victoria sniggered behind her hand, helplessly. Stephanie disappeared under the table, where hysterical laughter suddenly sounded, so loud that the table began to shake, causing Michelle great agony as the knife twisted in her leg. "Stop, it, Stephanie!" she shrieked, between peals of laughter. Christina was snorting, highly unladylike laughter exploding from her mouth. Angeline and Katie did their best to laugh elegantly, behind their hands. "That is so not true," laughed Angeline, placing a hand on Oliver's arm. "Trust me. It's so not true that it's not funny." Rachel's eyes went crossed. "What the?" she asked. "But it is funny. That's why we're all laughing." "Ow! Stephanie!" yelped Michelle, trying, unsuccessfully, to yank the knife out of the vibrating table. "I have never met a group of more cold-hearted females in my life!" exclaimed Oliver, horrified. "How 'bout when Katie Bell dumped you?" asked Rachel, innocently. The man's face twisted in agony, as he remembered his ex girlfriend. "You cruel child!" he sobbed, taking off, and blowing his nose loudly in a handkerchief. "What?" grinned Rachel. "All I said was.Katie Bell!" "Ugh! You're so mean," Angeline slapped her arm. "Yeah," Katie's handprint was added to Rachel's suffering limb. "You're not in Slytherin?" Rachel raised her eyebrows. "And you hit people more often than Michelle." "Shut up, Rachel," groaned Michelle.
*
Haha! Only our first day, and I have managed to kick someone into a tree, Angeline has managed to bore her class to sleep, (what's new?) Michelle has stabbed herself with a butter knife, and I have brought back painful memories for Oliver Wood. Enough chaos for one chapter? You just wait. And review, in the mean-time. Pleaz.