~A Very Good Year~
Chapter Two-Painful Realities
"What's going on, Chandler?" Ross asked.
"Yeah, why are you showing up here after five years?" Rachel followed.
"Where's your wife?" Monica wondered.
The questions came fast and furious, but Chandler had no time. He needed to do this, or he would never be able to.
"Guys, can you just-look, the thing is-I need a favor."
"A favor?" Ross repeated.
Chandler nodded, but kept his eyes on the table. He was silent for a moment, then took a deep breath and began the speech he'd rehearsed in his head for the past three days.
"Anna-my wife-was, uh, killed a couple of years ago. Sadie was 11 months old. Anna didn't have any family, and, well, you know how my parents are, so.I've been doing this on my own-"
"Are you asking for money?" Ross interrupted. He couldn't believe Chandler's audacity.
"No. No, I have plenty of money.I." Chandler was beginning to lose his train of thought. He suddenly felt very tired, and was beginning to think that he should just forget it. But he looked over at Sadie, and realized that he had to do what was right for his daughter. He cleared his throat, and looked each of his former friends in the eye, hoping that they would see just how serious he was.
"I want you to raise my daughter."
The room was silent for a second-the quiet before the storm.
"What?" Ross yelled.
"Have you lost your mind?" Phoebe added.
"You have GOT to be kidding," Rachel shook her head.
"Chandler," Monica asked calmly, "you seem to be doing fine. Why would you want us to raise her?"
Chandler looked directly at Monica, knowing in his heart that she would be the one to take on the task, once everything was explained properly. The toughest part was over-he'd asked The Question. Now, all he had to do was make them see that he had no other choice.
"Despite everything that's happened, you are the only people I trust to take care of Sadie. I don't want her to be raised by strangers. I-" Chandler shook his head. He was going about this the wrong way. His friends looked baffled.
"Okay, here's the thing," Chandler looked at Sadie again, and watched her for a silent moment. She giggled, and that reassured Chandler that she was not listening to the adult conversation.
"I'm dying."
~*~
Monica felt her heart stop. Had she heard Chandler right? He was-dying? That's impossible. He's too young. He's a father. He's.too young. She barely heard Ross when he asked Chandler to repeat what he'd said.
"What did you say?"
"There's a mass.in my brain. It's too big and too deep to take out. There's not much that can be done. A few months ago.I started getting these headaches. They were few and far between, but they are getting worse, and more frequent. I'm afraid to raise Sadie alone now, because if something happens, and I can't help her, I'll be devastated. I thought about all of the people in my life who I'd want my daughter to be with, when I go." Chandler kept his eyes on Monica the entire time he spoke, making it clear that she was the one he was referring to.
Monica watched Chandler's face as he spoke, all the while repeating the same sentence in her head over and over: This isn't happening, this isn't happening, this isn't happening.
~*~
January
It still hadn't really hit any of them. Chandler seemed healthy and normal, so maybe this was some weird prank. But even Chandler's sense of humor wasn't *that* bad.
Chandler had decided that none of them should make The Decision now. He went back to Los Angeles to tie up loose ends, and was back in New York just after the New Year. Monica insisted that he and Sadie stay with her until they found a place to live, and Chandler was happy that Monica had extended the invitation-it would give Sadie a chance to get used to Monica. But the fact that Joey hadn't mentioned anything about Chandler moving back into his old place was in the back of Chandler's mind, and it broke his heart.
*
For a long time after Chandler had told them he was going to die within the year, the group had gone into denial about the entire thing. They all tried to pretend that it was okay, and even tried to pretend that the past five years had never even happened. They hung out much more now than they had only a few weeks ago, and that Sunday, Monica found herself cooking breakfast for much more than one.
Ross and Rachel had left Ben and Belle with Carol and Susan, so it was just the seven of them (including Sadie). Monica couldn't help but let a wave of nostalgia sweep over her. She was thrilled to have everyone back, and in good spirits.
Chandler, on the other hand, was mildly annoyed with his friend's behavior. He needed them to see that this was not a joke, and that everything was going to change very soon. He needed them to accept that this was not going away.
But, in all fairness, Chandler had gone through the exact same grieving period. There was a time when he had denied all of this as well. He then went through the anger, depression, and eventual acceptance that the others had yet to experience. He wondered if they even believed him.
If they didn't, they were about to.
The conversation around the table was light and animated, and at first, no one was aware of what was happening at the other end of the table. Chandler, however, was well aware of what was happening, and he tried to get up and leave the room, but his legs felt like lead. He set down his fork, and looked over at Sadie, who was talking poor Phoebe's ear off. Suddenly, the image in front of him blurred, and his hands started to shake.
Monica was only mildly aware of the fact that Chandler had suddenly stopped moving, eating and talking, as she continued her conversation with Rachel. But then, out of her peripheral vision, she saw Chandler's entire body contract. She looked over, just in time to see him collapse onto the kitchen floor.
The only person in the room who didn't panic was Sadie. Everyone was yelling at once, as the shock of reality hit everyone. Chaos fluttered around Chandler, but Sadie simply hopped off of her seat, and ran into Monica's guest room-the room Sadie and Chandler were currently using. Sadie re-appeared with a small brown bottle of pills, and shook Monica's arm until she finally looked down at the little girl.
"Medithin," Sadie said simply.
Monica nodded, and her head finally cleared. She used the power of her voice to get her friend's to shut up, while she crouched over Chandler.
Chandler came to, and saw that everyone was standing over him, and that they all looked-scared.
"Chandler, are you okay? Should we call an ambulance or something?"
"No.no there's nothing they can do," Chandler whispered, as he pulled himself up against Monica's kitchen cabinets. He leaned back, and closed his eyes for a moment. He looked calm, and that was when Monica realized that he was accustomed to this now. It was strange to think that blacking out like that could become a regular piece of someone's day. She now understood Chandler's desperation in regard to Sadie. It was clear that he was in no condition to be a three-year old girl's soul provider.
Monica sat down on the floor in front of Chandler, and the others took a seat at the table. No one said anything for a moment. Monica handed Chandler his medication silently. Chandler looked at the vile, and then back up at Monica, a puzzled expression lining his brow.
"Sadie," Monica stated simply, knowing that Chandler would understand.
Chandler looked at his daughter and smiled warmly. Sadie took that as a sign that her father was feeling better, and made her way over to him, plopping herself square onto his lap. Chandler wrapped his arms around his little girl, and kissed the top of her head lightly. He then looked up at Monica, and knew that she had made her decision.
Chapter Two-Painful Realities
"What's going on, Chandler?" Ross asked.
"Yeah, why are you showing up here after five years?" Rachel followed.
"Where's your wife?" Monica wondered.
The questions came fast and furious, but Chandler had no time. He needed to do this, or he would never be able to.
"Guys, can you just-look, the thing is-I need a favor."
"A favor?" Ross repeated.
Chandler nodded, but kept his eyes on the table. He was silent for a moment, then took a deep breath and began the speech he'd rehearsed in his head for the past three days.
"Anna-my wife-was, uh, killed a couple of years ago. Sadie was 11 months old. Anna didn't have any family, and, well, you know how my parents are, so.I've been doing this on my own-"
"Are you asking for money?" Ross interrupted. He couldn't believe Chandler's audacity.
"No. No, I have plenty of money.I." Chandler was beginning to lose his train of thought. He suddenly felt very tired, and was beginning to think that he should just forget it. But he looked over at Sadie, and realized that he had to do what was right for his daughter. He cleared his throat, and looked each of his former friends in the eye, hoping that they would see just how serious he was.
"I want you to raise my daughter."
The room was silent for a second-the quiet before the storm.
"What?" Ross yelled.
"Have you lost your mind?" Phoebe added.
"You have GOT to be kidding," Rachel shook her head.
"Chandler," Monica asked calmly, "you seem to be doing fine. Why would you want us to raise her?"
Chandler looked directly at Monica, knowing in his heart that she would be the one to take on the task, once everything was explained properly. The toughest part was over-he'd asked The Question. Now, all he had to do was make them see that he had no other choice.
"Despite everything that's happened, you are the only people I trust to take care of Sadie. I don't want her to be raised by strangers. I-" Chandler shook his head. He was going about this the wrong way. His friends looked baffled.
"Okay, here's the thing," Chandler looked at Sadie again, and watched her for a silent moment. She giggled, and that reassured Chandler that she was not listening to the adult conversation.
"I'm dying."
~*~
Monica felt her heart stop. Had she heard Chandler right? He was-dying? That's impossible. He's too young. He's a father. He's.too young. She barely heard Ross when he asked Chandler to repeat what he'd said.
"What did you say?"
"There's a mass.in my brain. It's too big and too deep to take out. There's not much that can be done. A few months ago.I started getting these headaches. They were few and far between, but they are getting worse, and more frequent. I'm afraid to raise Sadie alone now, because if something happens, and I can't help her, I'll be devastated. I thought about all of the people in my life who I'd want my daughter to be with, when I go." Chandler kept his eyes on Monica the entire time he spoke, making it clear that she was the one he was referring to.
Monica watched Chandler's face as he spoke, all the while repeating the same sentence in her head over and over: This isn't happening, this isn't happening, this isn't happening.
~*~
January
It still hadn't really hit any of them. Chandler seemed healthy and normal, so maybe this was some weird prank. But even Chandler's sense of humor wasn't *that* bad.
Chandler had decided that none of them should make The Decision now. He went back to Los Angeles to tie up loose ends, and was back in New York just after the New Year. Monica insisted that he and Sadie stay with her until they found a place to live, and Chandler was happy that Monica had extended the invitation-it would give Sadie a chance to get used to Monica. But the fact that Joey hadn't mentioned anything about Chandler moving back into his old place was in the back of Chandler's mind, and it broke his heart.
*
For a long time after Chandler had told them he was going to die within the year, the group had gone into denial about the entire thing. They all tried to pretend that it was okay, and even tried to pretend that the past five years had never even happened. They hung out much more now than they had only a few weeks ago, and that Sunday, Monica found herself cooking breakfast for much more than one.
Ross and Rachel had left Ben and Belle with Carol and Susan, so it was just the seven of them (including Sadie). Monica couldn't help but let a wave of nostalgia sweep over her. She was thrilled to have everyone back, and in good spirits.
Chandler, on the other hand, was mildly annoyed with his friend's behavior. He needed them to see that this was not a joke, and that everything was going to change very soon. He needed them to accept that this was not going away.
But, in all fairness, Chandler had gone through the exact same grieving period. There was a time when he had denied all of this as well. He then went through the anger, depression, and eventual acceptance that the others had yet to experience. He wondered if they even believed him.
If they didn't, they were about to.
The conversation around the table was light and animated, and at first, no one was aware of what was happening at the other end of the table. Chandler, however, was well aware of what was happening, and he tried to get up and leave the room, but his legs felt like lead. He set down his fork, and looked over at Sadie, who was talking poor Phoebe's ear off. Suddenly, the image in front of him blurred, and his hands started to shake.
Monica was only mildly aware of the fact that Chandler had suddenly stopped moving, eating and talking, as she continued her conversation with Rachel. But then, out of her peripheral vision, she saw Chandler's entire body contract. She looked over, just in time to see him collapse onto the kitchen floor.
The only person in the room who didn't panic was Sadie. Everyone was yelling at once, as the shock of reality hit everyone. Chaos fluttered around Chandler, but Sadie simply hopped off of her seat, and ran into Monica's guest room-the room Sadie and Chandler were currently using. Sadie re-appeared with a small brown bottle of pills, and shook Monica's arm until she finally looked down at the little girl.
"Medithin," Sadie said simply.
Monica nodded, and her head finally cleared. She used the power of her voice to get her friend's to shut up, while she crouched over Chandler.
Chandler came to, and saw that everyone was standing over him, and that they all looked-scared.
"Chandler, are you okay? Should we call an ambulance or something?"
"No.no there's nothing they can do," Chandler whispered, as he pulled himself up against Monica's kitchen cabinets. He leaned back, and closed his eyes for a moment. He looked calm, and that was when Monica realized that he was accustomed to this now. It was strange to think that blacking out like that could become a regular piece of someone's day. She now understood Chandler's desperation in regard to Sadie. It was clear that he was in no condition to be a three-year old girl's soul provider.
Monica sat down on the floor in front of Chandler, and the others took a seat at the table. No one said anything for a moment. Monica handed Chandler his medication silently. Chandler looked at the vile, and then back up at Monica, a puzzled expression lining his brow.
"Sadie," Monica stated simply, knowing that Chandler would understand.
Chandler looked at his daughter and smiled warmly. Sadie took that as a sign that her father was feeling better, and made her way over to him, plopping herself square onto his lap. Chandler wrapped his arms around his little girl, and kissed the top of her head lightly. He then looked up at Monica, and knew that she had made her decision.