Chapter 2- The Wedding
Here you go, the second installment of our story. Dorothy and Heero get hitched.
The guests were assembled, the champagne was chilled, the cake delivered, the tux rented, but unfortunately there was nothing to be done about the eyebrows, no matter the quantity of wax. And no matter how much shampoo was used, the young Peacecraft could not erase the ugly red from her normally honey blonde hair. Granted, she only had one night and Zechs does tend to use up a lot of shampoo.
Now, Zechs only lived with his little sister, (Little, because she is a shrimp) because he had no where else to go, especially after Noin kicked him out. Or at least she claims, it was probably Zechs who left. It made for a...interesting domestic situation.
Now, back to the wedding. It was meant to be a beautiful ceremony, flowers, and lace, and ribbons, and joy, but that sort of thing didn't suit either Heero or Dorothy. It started lovely, with little Mariemaia the flower girl skipping cheerfully down the aisle. Lady Une coughed discreetly, trying to make it clear, she not supposed to skip.
And then, came the maid of honor. Relena tried desperately to hide her, discolored hair in a bun, but it failed. Everyone looked from the maid of honor up to the best man, then back to the maid of honor. Finally, Duo suffering from after effects of the bachelor party, (Actually, there was no bachelor party, Duo just had one on his own) called out: "Hey! They're brother and sister!" Relena turned the shade of her hair and promptly yelled out "I am *not* dancing with him!"
Heero gave an inward sigh of relief that he did not marry the former Queen of the World, as rich as she had to be.
All of a sudden, during the services, Milliardo's eyes went glassy and with a hoarse yell he charged at the first seat and immediately started strangling Wufei. With some help from Trowa, Sally managed to pull the crazed Peacecraft off of her escort.
Heero gave a discreet signal with his hand and two big security guards came from the shadows and grabbed Zechs by the collar and dragged him away kicking and screaming.
"I'll get you someday Wufei and your little dog too!"
"I don't have a dog." Said a very puzzled Wufei.
Zechs seemed to calm a minute, scratching his chin thoughtfully, "Oh, well I'll still get you for ruining my life! I always knew you were jealous of Treize and me, you like him didn't you? Didn't you!?"
"Oh my god NO!" Wufei yelled as the guards finally hauled a screaming and swearing Zechs from the church.
"Can he say stuff like that in a church?" Catherine asked.
"Oh man it doesn't matter, I used to cuss in church all the time. It's no big deal." Duo said leaning over and falling into Trowa's lap, who did not look too happy about this.
"are you okay Duo? I mean I know Dorothy had a weird effect on people, but I've never seen it this bad." Quatre asked worriedly, someone had obviously dragged the blond to the wedding, because he wouldn't have been there otherwise.
In all the excitement and confusion no one noticed that the priest had continued the ceremony and was now on the "I do's". A hush fell over the crowd waiting to see if they would actually go through with this.
"Do you Dorothy Gwendolyn Catalonia take Heero Bob Yuy to be your lawful wedded husband?" The priest looked between two on the podium questioningly.
"Bob? What kind of middle name is that?" Snickered Duo.
"Technically I don't have a middle name and Bob was the first thing that popped into my head. Actually I don't have a name at all but Heero Bob Yuy sounded better on the marriage certificate then no name, and besides Trowa already took that." Upon hearing this Trowa stood up, and gave a small bow before sitting back down.
The priest rubbed his forehead and muttered, "What is this a wedding or a circus?"
Catherine overheard this and stood up with a big grin, "Say, do you want to see my knife throwing act?" Trowa subtly shifted away from his "sister" pretending not to know her.
The priest paled considerably "Uh, no thank you." He stammered, sweating a bit. "Let's just finish this so we can all go home. Look, do you guys want to get married?"
"Well yes, of course!" Dorothy said enthusiastically. She waited for Heero to agree her eyebrow twitching impatiently.
Heero grunted. "I'll take that as a yes." The priest said hurriedly "Okay you're married, get me out of here I'm going home, or maybe to the bar."
"Can I go with you!?" Duo cried, the priest took one look at him and ran for the door.
The newly wed Dorothy clapped her hands gleefully, "Well then, I guess it's time for the reception!" She started down the stairs but tripped on her long wedding dress. Quatre and Duo could not help themselves, they burst out laughing. Even the normally stoic Wufei cracked a smile.
Dorothy shot a threatening glare at Quatre who immediately stopped laughing, gave a small 'eep' and hid under one of the benches.
The party moved downstairs to their dismay they found half the cake missing, most of the liquor consumed and the little figure of Heero from the top of the cake, was gone. Later on, no one asked what Zechs did with it, they did not want to know.
Their eyes alit on a figure sitting at one of the tables with a half empty bottle of wine, or perhaps champagne it really didn't matter. And seemed to be singing off-key to himself. "Nobody knows, the troubles I've seen, troubles I've seen, troubles I've seen, nobody knows my sorrow."
"Oh dear lord make it stop!" cried Lady Une in panic, she fell to her knees and began to pray.
Zechs paused a minute, if only to take another swig from the bottle and stared at her. Then he started afresh "Ding dong the witch is dead, which old witch? Lady Une! Ding dong the wicked witch is dead!" he warbled grinning, proud of his clever song.
Lady Une slowly got off her knees and walked towards him and began to strangle him. And this time, no one stopped them.
Zechs retaliated trying to hit her with the bottle and managed only to spill champagne all over himself. He began to whimper like a little child. "Look what you made me do you mean, mean lady!" Lady Une slapped him and walked away, looking pleased with herself only to get hit in the back of the head with the bottle. Despite his condition, Zechs still had very good aim.
In a joyous mood Zechs grabbed the person nearest to him, and started dancing wildly around. Unfortunately the person closest to him was a very frightened Wufei, who as hard as he tried could not break away from the drunk blond.
"Wait a minute? I thought you wanted to kill me?" Wufei cried.
Zechs paused, looking thoughtful. "You're right I do." He lunged at the unsuspecting Chinese man began to tickle him to death.
Wufei rolled around on the floor laughing hysterically and begging for mercy, but Zechs would give him none.
Deciding the fight was not about to turn lethal, the remainder of the guests headed for the dance floor. When rap music began to play everyone looked over at the turntable questionably to see Duo, having a great time.
"Just call me the DJ of Death!" He called out gleefully.
Dorothy glared at him, hands on hips, and yelled, "This is *my* wedding, and we'll listen to the music I want!" Duo backed away fearfully, scared of the psychotic blond, (and no we're not talking about Zechs, although he is kind of scary).
"And what kind of music does my honey bunch want?" Heero asked, receiving groans of disgust from the other guests.
Dorothy smiled sweetly, and replied, "I've always been partial to Marilyn Manson." Every one opened their mouths to protest but alas! "Beautiful People" came blaring from the speakers.
"Who cares if the music sucks!" Duo exclaimed. "Let's boogie down!" The God of Death had obviously gotten a hold of one of the bottles of champagne, much to Zechs' dismay when he went looking for it later.
The screaming of the music was only surpassed by the yelling of Chang Wufei. "AHHHH let me go, stop it! Stop it!"
"Then admit I am the tickle master!" Demanded Zechs.
"Yes." Wufei gasped laughing so hard tears rolled down his cheeks. "You are the tickle monster!"
"Alright then." Zechs said solemnly standing up.
"You may live... for now. But beware the tickle monster strikes with out warning."
After staring at Zechs for a minute the guests shook their heads and returned to dancing.
Deciding that he wanted to have a little fun while he was there Zechs approached the newly wed couple. Tapping Heero on the shoulder he asked, "mind if I cut in?"
"Well I guess that would be okay." Dorothy said offering Zechs her hand.
Zechs gave her a horrified look, "I don't want to dance with *you*! I meant Heero."
Everyone slowly backed away from the three, a couple people tripped over a still fallen Lady Une.
"You are not dancing with my new husband." Dorothy glared evilly her eyebrows twitching. "What do you take him for?" She demanded.
"What?" Zechs asked indignantly, "It's not like I asked to kiss him, my you're over protective."
"You know what Zechs? I think I'll pass on this. Why don't you go dance with..." Heero looked around thoughtfully. "Go dance with Trowa, he's taller anyway."
"I don't know if Trowa's my type." Zechs looked around the room, he's settling on Duo. The American gave a high pitched scream and fled. Several other guests followed his example rushing toward the exits.
Dorothy pouted and asked sadly, "why is Quatre running away from me?" Since Duo had already left there was no sarcastic reply, only silence followed.
"I suppose since some of the guest have already left we should call it a day." Heero announced happily, trying not to sound too happy.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Don't worry we won't be writing the wedding night, we'll let your imaginations fill that in. The next chapter however will be the 'Honeymoon of Doom'! Don't you dare say anything, we know it's cheesy.
Here you go, the second installment of our story. Dorothy and Heero get hitched.
The guests were assembled, the champagne was chilled, the cake delivered, the tux rented, but unfortunately there was nothing to be done about the eyebrows, no matter the quantity of wax. And no matter how much shampoo was used, the young Peacecraft could not erase the ugly red from her normally honey blonde hair. Granted, she only had one night and Zechs does tend to use up a lot of shampoo.
Now, Zechs only lived with his little sister, (Little, because she is a shrimp) because he had no where else to go, especially after Noin kicked him out. Or at least she claims, it was probably Zechs who left. It made for a...interesting domestic situation.
Now, back to the wedding. It was meant to be a beautiful ceremony, flowers, and lace, and ribbons, and joy, but that sort of thing didn't suit either Heero or Dorothy. It started lovely, with little Mariemaia the flower girl skipping cheerfully down the aisle. Lady Une coughed discreetly, trying to make it clear, she not supposed to skip.
And then, came the maid of honor. Relena tried desperately to hide her, discolored hair in a bun, but it failed. Everyone looked from the maid of honor up to the best man, then back to the maid of honor. Finally, Duo suffering from after effects of the bachelor party, (Actually, there was no bachelor party, Duo just had one on his own) called out: "Hey! They're brother and sister!" Relena turned the shade of her hair and promptly yelled out "I am *not* dancing with him!"
Heero gave an inward sigh of relief that he did not marry the former Queen of the World, as rich as she had to be.
All of a sudden, during the services, Milliardo's eyes went glassy and with a hoarse yell he charged at the first seat and immediately started strangling Wufei. With some help from Trowa, Sally managed to pull the crazed Peacecraft off of her escort.
Heero gave a discreet signal with his hand and two big security guards came from the shadows and grabbed Zechs by the collar and dragged him away kicking and screaming.
"I'll get you someday Wufei and your little dog too!"
"I don't have a dog." Said a very puzzled Wufei.
Zechs seemed to calm a minute, scratching his chin thoughtfully, "Oh, well I'll still get you for ruining my life! I always knew you were jealous of Treize and me, you like him didn't you? Didn't you!?"
"Oh my god NO!" Wufei yelled as the guards finally hauled a screaming and swearing Zechs from the church.
"Can he say stuff like that in a church?" Catherine asked.
"Oh man it doesn't matter, I used to cuss in church all the time. It's no big deal." Duo said leaning over and falling into Trowa's lap, who did not look too happy about this.
"are you okay Duo? I mean I know Dorothy had a weird effect on people, but I've never seen it this bad." Quatre asked worriedly, someone had obviously dragged the blond to the wedding, because he wouldn't have been there otherwise.
In all the excitement and confusion no one noticed that the priest had continued the ceremony and was now on the "I do's". A hush fell over the crowd waiting to see if they would actually go through with this.
"Do you Dorothy Gwendolyn Catalonia take Heero Bob Yuy to be your lawful wedded husband?" The priest looked between two on the podium questioningly.
"Bob? What kind of middle name is that?" Snickered Duo.
"Technically I don't have a middle name and Bob was the first thing that popped into my head. Actually I don't have a name at all but Heero Bob Yuy sounded better on the marriage certificate then no name, and besides Trowa already took that." Upon hearing this Trowa stood up, and gave a small bow before sitting back down.
The priest rubbed his forehead and muttered, "What is this a wedding or a circus?"
Catherine overheard this and stood up with a big grin, "Say, do you want to see my knife throwing act?" Trowa subtly shifted away from his "sister" pretending not to know her.
The priest paled considerably "Uh, no thank you." He stammered, sweating a bit. "Let's just finish this so we can all go home. Look, do you guys want to get married?"
"Well yes, of course!" Dorothy said enthusiastically. She waited for Heero to agree her eyebrow twitching impatiently.
Heero grunted. "I'll take that as a yes." The priest said hurriedly "Okay you're married, get me out of here I'm going home, or maybe to the bar."
"Can I go with you!?" Duo cried, the priest took one look at him and ran for the door.
The newly wed Dorothy clapped her hands gleefully, "Well then, I guess it's time for the reception!" She started down the stairs but tripped on her long wedding dress. Quatre and Duo could not help themselves, they burst out laughing. Even the normally stoic Wufei cracked a smile.
Dorothy shot a threatening glare at Quatre who immediately stopped laughing, gave a small 'eep' and hid under one of the benches.
The party moved downstairs to their dismay they found half the cake missing, most of the liquor consumed and the little figure of Heero from the top of the cake, was gone. Later on, no one asked what Zechs did with it, they did not want to know.
Their eyes alit on a figure sitting at one of the tables with a half empty bottle of wine, or perhaps champagne it really didn't matter. And seemed to be singing off-key to himself. "Nobody knows, the troubles I've seen, troubles I've seen, troubles I've seen, nobody knows my sorrow."
"Oh dear lord make it stop!" cried Lady Une in panic, she fell to her knees and began to pray.
Zechs paused a minute, if only to take another swig from the bottle and stared at her. Then he started afresh "Ding dong the witch is dead, which old witch? Lady Une! Ding dong the wicked witch is dead!" he warbled grinning, proud of his clever song.
Lady Une slowly got off her knees and walked towards him and began to strangle him. And this time, no one stopped them.
Zechs retaliated trying to hit her with the bottle and managed only to spill champagne all over himself. He began to whimper like a little child. "Look what you made me do you mean, mean lady!" Lady Une slapped him and walked away, looking pleased with herself only to get hit in the back of the head with the bottle. Despite his condition, Zechs still had very good aim.
In a joyous mood Zechs grabbed the person nearest to him, and started dancing wildly around. Unfortunately the person closest to him was a very frightened Wufei, who as hard as he tried could not break away from the drunk blond.
"Wait a minute? I thought you wanted to kill me?" Wufei cried.
Zechs paused, looking thoughtful. "You're right I do." He lunged at the unsuspecting Chinese man began to tickle him to death.
Wufei rolled around on the floor laughing hysterically and begging for mercy, but Zechs would give him none.
Deciding the fight was not about to turn lethal, the remainder of the guests headed for the dance floor. When rap music began to play everyone looked over at the turntable questionably to see Duo, having a great time.
"Just call me the DJ of Death!" He called out gleefully.
Dorothy glared at him, hands on hips, and yelled, "This is *my* wedding, and we'll listen to the music I want!" Duo backed away fearfully, scared of the psychotic blond, (and no we're not talking about Zechs, although he is kind of scary).
"And what kind of music does my honey bunch want?" Heero asked, receiving groans of disgust from the other guests.
Dorothy smiled sweetly, and replied, "I've always been partial to Marilyn Manson." Every one opened their mouths to protest but alas! "Beautiful People" came blaring from the speakers.
"Who cares if the music sucks!" Duo exclaimed. "Let's boogie down!" The God of Death had obviously gotten a hold of one of the bottles of champagne, much to Zechs' dismay when he went looking for it later.
The screaming of the music was only surpassed by the yelling of Chang Wufei. "AHHHH let me go, stop it! Stop it!"
"Then admit I am the tickle master!" Demanded Zechs.
"Yes." Wufei gasped laughing so hard tears rolled down his cheeks. "You are the tickle monster!"
"Alright then." Zechs said solemnly standing up.
"You may live... for now. But beware the tickle monster strikes with out warning."
After staring at Zechs for a minute the guests shook their heads and returned to dancing.
Deciding that he wanted to have a little fun while he was there Zechs approached the newly wed couple. Tapping Heero on the shoulder he asked, "mind if I cut in?"
"Well I guess that would be okay." Dorothy said offering Zechs her hand.
Zechs gave her a horrified look, "I don't want to dance with *you*! I meant Heero."
Everyone slowly backed away from the three, a couple people tripped over a still fallen Lady Une.
"You are not dancing with my new husband." Dorothy glared evilly her eyebrows twitching. "What do you take him for?" She demanded.
"What?" Zechs asked indignantly, "It's not like I asked to kiss him, my you're over protective."
"You know what Zechs? I think I'll pass on this. Why don't you go dance with..." Heero looked around thoughtfully. "Go dance with Trowa, he's taller anyway."
"I don't know if Trowa's my type." Zechs looked around the room, he's settling on Duo. The American gave a high pitched scream and fled. Several other guests followed his example rushing toward the exits.
Dorothy pouted and asked sadly, "why is Quatre running away from me?" Since Duo had already left there was no sarcastic reply, only silence followed.
"I suppose since some of the guest have already left we should call it a day." Heero announced happily, trying not to sound too happy.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Don't worry we won't be writing the wedding night, we'll let your imaginations fill that in. The next chapter however will be the 'Honeymoon of Doom'! Don't you dare say anything, we know it's cheesy.