Title: Sirius Black, the Time Warp, and the Oregon Trail

Disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling and the Oregon Trail game belongs to MECC.

Author's note: I'm BAAAACCKKK! Didja miss me? Well, I'm revising this lovely piece of utter chaos for grammar/spelling errors, slight plot changes, possible new chapters, and PETER! Aww, c'mon! Don't leave! It's Student!Peter! He's cool…and not evil. It'll still be nifty neato. Trust me.

            Hobey-ho! Dimloep Suum be praised!

                        ~Amanda

Chapter 1

It is a truth, universally acknowledged, that History of Magic was easily the most boring subject at Hogwarts School of Witch craft and Wizardry.

Professor Binns would drone on for what seemed like hours in his monotone voice, never noticing the dozing students, notes being passed, or the countless paper airplanes that soared around the classroom.

James Potter was daydreaming about Quidditch, when a wad of paper collided with his head, bringing him back to reality with an unpleasant jolt. He picked up the paper, unfolded it and read the note, written in Sirius's handwriting.

Welcome back to the living Jamsie.

James smirked and quickly scribbled a reply. He crumpled the paper into a ball and tossed across the room to Sirius, aiming for his head. James missed his target. Instead the paper ball landed in Sirius's opened History of Magic book. Sirius flashed James a grin and read.

I wasn't dead you know.

Could have fooled me.

Shut up Sirius.

I didn't say anything.

You know what I mean.

No, I'm afraid I don't know.

Come on.

No. I don't wanna!

You're impossible.

No, I'm Sirius, actually.

Shut up, Sirius (don't take that literally)

Aww, you never let me have any fun.

Yes I do.

           Hey James, how do you get a song out of you're head?

That was a random change of topic.

I try to be spontaneous. Can we get back to the problem at hand, James? What do I about this blasted song?

Is this a trick question?

No. I keep hearing this song over, and, over, and over again. It's annoying the hell out of me.

Just ignore the voices in your head Sirius.

I am not schizophrenic. Paranoid? Yes. Schizophrenic? Never.

Well, try thinking of something else then.

I tried that already.

Sirius passed the paper back. In one deft move, Lily snatched the note in mid-air. She rolled her eyes at James and Sirius. Then she wrote a message ant threw it back to Sirius.

What song is it?

Does it really matter?

I was just asking.

It's "Time Warp" from The Rocky Horror Picture Show if you must know.

Sirius passed the note to James, who passed it to along to Remus, who paused in his note taking to read. Remus had to put bite his lip to stifle a laugh. He joined in their "conversation". He jotted down a message and passed the note to Sirius.

A good way to cure yourself of a song in your head is to sing it out loud.

No way Remus!

           

            Do it!

            No!

            Sensing an oncoming fight, Lily caught the paper (being thrown with increasing force).

            Let Peter decide then. He's an innocent, disinterested, impartial bystander.

            Sirius tapped Peter on the shoulder, prodding him awake. After a quick analysis of the situation, he scribbled his vote.

            Let's hear it Sirius!

            Overruled due to the possibility of overwhelming humiliation that would result from History of Magic Karaoke.

I dare you!

Sirius never turned down a dare. That's usually why he was always in trouble. He grinned at Remus, who looked quite proud of his little trick, then got up and cleared his throat. After a shaky start, he wasn't bad. Actually, once he got into it, the entire class was joining in the fun. When he finished the song everyone cheered. Suddenly, there was a flash of a bright white light.

            Sirius, James, Remus, Peter, and Lily were gone.

            And no one cared.

            Or noticed.

            Except the people who disappeared.

            Yeah…them.

            They cared.

            They cared a great deal.

Why did they care you ask? Well, after another flash, they appeared in a little town. Everywhere there were large covered wagons drawn by oxen. People in the strangest clothing walked the streets and went in and out of shops. It was Sirius who voiced what everyone else was thinking.

"WHERE THE BLOODY HELL ARE WE!"

Lily tapped his shoulder. She pointed to a large wooden sign that read:

Independence, Missouri

Est. 1821