A day later, every single member of the Fellowship, plus one wannabe
member, was miserable.
Gollum didn't have his precioussss. This made him pissssssed.
Merry was hungry.
Aragorn was mad that all the flesh had rotted off the skeletons. They didn't look sexy anymore.
Boromir was still flipping out over his upcoming death.
Sam almost wished that Frodo would die again so he could *revive* him.
Legolas thought all the hobbits were very inconsiderate, but he still was the only one who ever came close to Sam (who smelled of vomit). Of course, Legolas only ever approached Sam with a knife.
Frodo possessed ten very bruised, scratched fingers. Ten.
Gimli was concerned that his beard was thinning. He spent all of his spare time looking for puddles of water so he could check his reflection.
Gandalf was suffering a nervous breakdown as a result of his intense lygophobia.
Pippin was stuck.
"You fool of a Took!" hissed Gandalf.
"Actually, I'm not a Took," said Pippin. "My mother was a hamster and my father smelt of elderberries."
"Pippin, that's not a good thing to tell people," whispered Merry. Pippin looked crestfallen. "Oh."
"Well, what are we supposed to do?" asked Boromir, throwing his hands up in the air.
Legolas looked grave. "I'm afraid we must leave the young hobbit behind. Here, let me take one of his fingers to remember him by."
"Legolas, NO!" said Aragorn. "If he dies, you can cut off his fingers, and I'll. well, never mind what I'll do. But he is a member of the Fellowship, and we are sworn to protect him."
"Damn you and your protection," muttered Legolas rebelliously.
"Protection from what?" asked Pippin.
"From himself," Frodo whispered into Pippin's ear.
"Why does he have to protect him from himself?" asked Pippin aloud.
"Oh, shut up," said Gandalf irritably, quickly pulling Pippin out.
"Legolas. Does my beard look any thinner to you?" asked Gimli, shoving his face in Legolas's. Legolas pulled away, startled.
"SCREW THIS," said Gandalf. "I can't stand you idiots anymore. I'm leaving to stay with someone more intelligent. An Istari, in fact."
"Huh?" asked Aragorn.
"I'M ELOPING WITH SARUMAN!" Gandalf bellowed.
Gollum didn't have his precioussss. This made him pissssssed.
Merry was hungry.
Aragorn was mad that all the flesh had rotted off the skeletons. They didn't look sexy anymore.
Boromir was still flipping out over his upcoming death.
Sam almost wished that Frodo would die again so he could *revive* him.
Legolas thought all the hobbits were very inconsiderate, but he still was the only one who ever came close to Sam (who smelled of vomit). Of course, Legolas only ever approached Sam with a knife.
Frodo possessed ten very bruised, scratched fingers. Ten.
Gimli was concerned that his beard was thinning. He spent all of his spare time looking for puddles of water so he could check his reflection.
Gandalf was suffering a nervous breakdown as a result of his intense lygophobia.
Pippin was stuck.
"You fool of a Took!" hissed Gandalf.
"Actually, I'm not a Took," said Pippin. "My mother was a hamster and my father smelt of elderberries."
"Pippin, that's not a good thing to tell people," whispered Merry. Pippin looked crestfallen. "Oh."
"Well, what are we supposed to do?" asked Boromir, throwing his hands up in the air.
Legolas looked grave. "I'm afraid we must leave the young hobbit behind. Here, let me take one of his fingers to remember him by."
"Legolas, NO!" said Aragorn. "If he dies, you can cut off his fingers, and I'll. well, never mind what I'll do. But he is a member of the Fellowship, and we are sworn to protect him."
"Damn you and your protection," muttered Legolas rebelliously.
"Protection from what?" asked Pippin.
"From himself," Frodo whispered into Pippin's ear.
"Why does he have to protect him from himself?" asked Pippin aloud.
"Oh, shut up," said Gandalf irritably, quickly pulling Pippin out.
"Legolas. Does my beard look any thinner to you?" asked Gimli, shoving his face in Legolas's. Legolas pulled away, startled.
"SCREW THIS," said Gandalf. "I can't stand you idiots anymore. I'm leaving to stay with someone more intelligent. An Istari, in fact."
"Huh?" asked Aragorn.
"I'M ELOPING WITH SARUMAN!" Gandalf bellowed.