Disclaimer: I don't own Legolas or any other LotR characters. Don't sue me,
blah, blah, blah! And I'm using real club names. I don't own them either.
And I've used a character from another book, guess what? I don't own him
either! Surprise, surprise!
A/N: This is two days before the wedding. They've been engaged for about two months because that's how long it will take Legolas' family to get to Minas Tirith for the wedding (imagine the message got to Mirkwood super quick, carried by an eagle, or something). I know Tafi will accept this because she always accepts what I write, however crap it is or whatever bullsh*t I'm reeling. So, this is sort of to everyone else who wants to criticise. *cough*Mary-Jo!*cough*. I do write crap, I know I do, but this is MY fic so if I want brief engagements and unrealistic travel times then I will have brief engagements and unrealistic travel times. OK, I have no idea what that was all about. Ignore me, completely. I do strange things like that sometimes. Sorry for shouting at you all. Well, you know what I mean. If I'd said it, it would have been shouted. I'm just going to shut up. Luvs Elfie xXxXx PS. Sorry, just enjoy the chapter. PPS. One more thing, sorry to all the American readers. 'Hen night' is a 'bachelorette party'. I was asked what a 'hen night' was, so I thought I should explain. And if I say 'Stag night', it's a 'bachelor party'. Anyway, I'll let you read now.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Important!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is Guardian of Tears! You see, Elf Crumpet is one of my best friends from school and she had now gone on holiday to. . .some sunny place. Lucky bitch. Anyhoo, being as how she won't be here to update, I said I would do it for her, the nice person I am. So she won't be able to reply to any reviews for a while. However please do review as she would love to have some to read when she comes back home. Alright I'll shut up now and let get to the important stuff. Chapter 15 of A new enemy! At long bloody last
Chapter 15
"Really?" said Robyn, excitedly. "I can go?"
"That's what she said." Tracey replied. "Her exact words were: 'Tell Robyn to keep tomorrow night free because that's when I'm having my hen night.' So, I took that to mean that you're going."
"Wow! I'm going to a hen party. COOL! Do you think she'll let me get drunk?"
"She'll be drunk herself. She won't exactly be able to stop you. But, if she does say no, just stick with me and Mary-Jo, we'll slip you some drinks."
"YAY! Thank you so much!" she gave Tracey a hug.
"Just don't get too wrecked. If you're anything like your mother after a night out on the booze, you'll have one hell of a hangover on Sunday morning."
"So, who else is going?"
"Well, Michelle, obviously, you and me, Mary-Jo, Kathrine, Arwen and Éowyn."
"Nan is going? Great. There is absolutely no way she's going to let me have any type of alcoholic drink, whatsoever! I may as well stay at home."
"But, she's not going as your Nan. Arwen doesn't really know us very well, so Michelle told her she could bring someone with her. She asked Éowyn."
"Well, I suppose if Mom's OK with it. So, there's only going to be 7 of us?"
"Unfortunately, yes. Nobody else was free tonight."
"Oh well, we can still have fun. Does Dad know I'm going?"
"Dad?" Tracey said, confusedly.
"Yes, Legolas, remember him? The one who's marrying Mom? My stepfather?"
"I know who you mean, but I didn't think you were being serious when you said you were going to call him 'Dad'."
"Why not? Look, I could understand your confusion if I gave a stuff about my real Dad, but I don't. I've never met him and I don't plan on it, but if I ever do, I certainly won't be calling him Dad. Legolas is way cooler! As far as I'm concerned, LEGOLAS is my dad."
"Fair enough."
"Ooh, crap! I've just had a thought!"
"Did it hurt?"
"Shut up! What am I going to wear?"
"I'll sort you with something. Don't worry about it."
At 8 o'clock the following evening, the seven women were gathered in Michelle's living room (Michelle and Robyn had now moved back in).
"So, where are we going 'Chelle?" said Mary-Jo.
"Why have you started calling me 'Chelle?" she said.
"Because Tafi says it and I like it. 32 years of 'Michelle' can get a bit boring."
"Are you saying I've got a boring name?"
"No, I'm saying it gets boring after 32 years. I like your name, but I just felt like a change. You don't mind me calling you 'Chelle, do you?"
"No."
"Good, now I say it again, where are we going?"
"Ask Arwen. She's taking us to some of her regulars." Robyn, Mary-Jo, Tracey and Kathrine gave her weird, shocked looks. Éowyn knew she went clubbing.
"What?" said Arwen, innocently. "What did you think I did in my spare time? Knit? Being married to a King isn't all it's cracked up to be, you know. He's rarely at home, so I occupy myself in Minas Tirith's clubs. Only the best, of course. And only with the fittest men. We'll go to Neon, Excels and, possibly, The Works. I like them, not too expensive."
"You really are a slag at heart, aren't you?" chuckled Éowyn.
"I would never cheat on Aragorn." She said, firmly. "I just like a good time. What's wrong with that? Anyway, shall we go?"
They made their way to the East of the City, renowned for its nightlife. All the best clubs were there, as well as some of the worst. Each club had had at least 1-hour long queues, and Michelle couldn't be doing with that. She walked up to the front of the queue for Neon, to speak to the bouncer.
"Excuse me, mate." She said, sweetly. "Is there any chance of us, you know, just slipping on the quiet?" The bouncer looked at her as if she was vermin. 'He'll regret that.' Thought Robyn.
"I'm going to give you to the count of ten to get to the back of the queue. 1. 2." 'He's for it now.'
"I'm sorry. I don't think you know exactly who we are. Let me introduce us to you. Firstly, there's me. I'm Michelle. As in, the Michelle that's daughter of the Prince of Ithilien, very good friends with King Aragorn and who is marrying one of his best friends. Legolas Greenleaf of Mirkwood, if you were wondering. Elvish royalty, very powerful. Then, there's my daughter, Robyn. The Robyn I went into labour with in the middle of King and Queen's wedding, and who's, also, closely related to the King. There's Mary-Jo, the woman who destroyed the Ring of Power. Yes, it was she. Here is Lady Éowyn, wife of Faramir, Prince of Ithilien, my stepmother. My best friend Tracey, no title but she's my friend, so there. Kathrine, Kathrine as in, Kathrine of the High Council of Gondor. And lastly, Queen Arwen." More and more blood drained from the bouncer's face as she went through the list of titles. When she finally reached Arwen, his mouth fell open. He was very embarrassed at trying to have stopped the Queen from entering the club. So, he muttered a very flustered apology and personally escorted them inside. Once settled inside, Arwen turned to Michelle.
"You know that was all very unnecessary. You could have just said Queen to start with and we'd have been in much sooner."
"I know." Said Michelle, happily. "But, I like bragging that I know all these famous people." Arwen laughed. 'Typical Michelle.' She thought. 'Constantly thinking of her status.'
By this point, it was 9:30 and none of them were drunk yet. So they went up to the bar (it was surprisingly quiet) and Michelle ordered a double vodka and orange for each of them. It took each of them approx. 10 seconds to down the drinks through thin straws and they were served every couple of minutes. So, after ½ hour, they were all quite tiddly. Well, all except Robyn. The drink just wasn't affecting her. The other six were getting more and more drunk. Robyn hadn't actually drunk as much as they had, but normally, she'd still already had enough to, make her forgetful, unbalanced and voluptuous. It was weird.
She glanced around the busy room. There were people dancing and drinking and having a good time. She felt out of place. 'Well, might as well check out the talent in this place. See if I can catch anyone's eye.' But, no such luck. All the nice blokes were either taken or staring at some other woman. Except one. 'Ooh, he's nice.' She thought. 'But, he looks sure of himself. He knows he's good looking. That's never a good thing. I can't be doing with cocky gits like that.' There was a boy, probably about 17, standing in the far corner, looking at her. She span around to face the bar and stared at the rows of spirits and liquors in front of her. 'Crap! How embarrassing! He saw me looking at him. Oh well, I'll probably never see him again, anyway, and he looks too arrogant for my liking.' Content with that thought, she turned her attention to trying to get a drink. The bar was getting busier, and took her about ten minutes to be served. Finally, one of the bartenders came over to her.
"And what can I do for you, little lady?" he said, flirtatiously. She wasn't impressed. He was about twice her age.
"Vodka and orange." She said, flatly, hoping he'd take the hint and go away. But he didn't.
"Are you sure that's all you want?" he said, whilst placing a hand one hers. She quickly pulled it away and shot a dark look at him.
"She asked for a drink, didn't she?" came a voice from behind her. Robyn turned around and saw that the lad from across the room was standing behind her. The bartender shot him a bitter look and walked away.
"I can handle myself, you know." She said. He stood looking at her. "Do you want something?" 'Why do men always think they have to save the 'damsel in distress'?' she thought. 'Girls can kick arse much better than men, why don't they just leave us to it?'
"Well," he started, "You see, I couldn't bear to see a pretty girl sitting here, alone, so I decided to come over and say hi."
"I'm not alone." She said, dryly. "I'm here with my m-" she was about to say mom, when she realised how lame it sounded, despite how close they were "-mates." It wasn't exactly a lie. Tracey and the others were her friends.
"Well, they're not very good mates, are they? They've left you here at the bar, on your own. Come one, at least let me buy you a drink. My name's Ash, by the way."
"Well, Ash, I'm afraid I have eyes for only one other." She said, mock apologetically. "I don't know who that other is yet, but he certainly isn't you. Excuse me." She stood up and walked to the toilet. There she found Mary-Jo, who was the least drunk, beside Robyn. Robyn told her what had happened at the bar and what she said (which made Mary-Jo laugh) but what she said wasn't helpful.
"That's great! 'Chelle's been going on at you, for ages, to look for a boyfriend. Maybe you can finally make her happy! Go back out there, go on, say something to him."
"Shut up, Mary-Jo. Look, don't tell mom, OK? All she'll do is embarrass me. She's bad enough when she's sober, let alone when she's drunk. So, just keep quiet!"
"No problem." Mary-Jo replied. "I don't even know where she's gone, so I can't tell her anything." Robyn gave her a dismissive wave and walked back into the club. 'If I can just find Arwen or Nan, I can keep away from Ash."
"At least tell me your name." 'Shit.' He was standing right next to her. She sighed with annoyance. There was no escaping him.
"If I tell you, will you leave me alone?"
"No, it'll probably make me more determined." He flashed a grin at her and she couldn't but laugh.
"I'm Robyn." She said. 'There, it's done. There'll be no getting away from him, now!'
"Robyn? I've heard that somewhere. Oh well, it's a pretty name. It suits you." She smiled, shyly, and could feel the heat growing in her cheeks. 'Thank Eru it's dark in here!' "Can I buy you a drink?"
"Sure, why not? Whatever I have tonight doesn't seem to affect me. I can't get drunk, it's not fair."
"Well, we'll have to sort that out, won't we?"
*****
A/N: That was a long chapter, but I won't apologise because apparently long chapters are good. So, what's Robyn going to do. Get a drink and ditch him? Get a drink and stay with him? Not get a drink at all because he's an arsehole and wants her for one thing? I don't know. Not at the moment anyway. OK, well I think for a bit then write the next chapter! Luvs Elfie xXxXx
A/N: This is two days before the wedding. They've been engaged for about two months because that's how long it will take Legolas' family to get to Minas Tirith for the wedding (imagine the message got to Mirkwood super quick, carried by an eagle, or something). I know Tafi will accept this because she always accepts what I write, however crap it is or whatever bullsh*t I'm reeling. So, this is sort of to everyone else who wants to criticise. *cough*Mary-Jo!*cough*. I do write crap, I know I do, but this is MY fic so if I want brief engagements and unrealistic travel times then I will have brief engagements and unrealistic travel times. OK, I have no idea what that was all about. Ignore me, completely. I do strange things like that sometimes. Sorry for shouting at you all. Well, you know what I mean. If I'd said it, it would have been shouted. I'm just going to shut up. Luvs Elfie xXxXx PS. Sorry, just enjoy the chapter. PPS. One more thing, sorry to all the American readers. 'Hen night' is a 'bachelorette party'. I was asked what a 'hen night' was, so I thought I should explain. And if I say 'Stag night', it's a 'bachelor party'. Anyway, I'll let you read now.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Important!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is Guardian of Tears! You see, Elf Crumpet is one of my best friends from school and she had now gone on holiday to. . .some sunny place. Lucky bitch. Anyhoo, being as how she won't be here to update, I said I would do it for her, the nice person I am. So she won't be able to reply to any reviews for a while. However please do review as she would love to have some to read when she comes back home. Alright I'll shut up now and let get to the important stuff. Chapter 15 of A new enemy! At long bloody last
Chapter 15
"Really?" said Robyn, excitedly. "I can go?"
"That's what she said." Tracey replied. "Her exact words were: 'Tell Robyn to keep tomorrow night free because that's when I'm having my hen night.' So, I took that to mean that you're going."
"Wow! I'm going to a hen party. COOL! Do you think she'll let me get drunk?"
"She'll be drunk herself. She won't exactly be able to stop you. But, if she does say no, just stick with me and Mary-Jo, we'll slip you some drinks."
"YAY! Thank you so much!" she gave Tracey a hug.
"Just don't get too wrecked. If you're anything like your mother after a night out on the booze, you'll have one hell of a hangover on Sunday morning."
"So, who else is going?"
"Well, Michelle, obviously, you and me, Mary-Jo, Kathrine, Arwen and Éowyn."
"Nan is going? Great. There is absolutely no way she's going to let me have any type of alcoholic drink, whatsoever! I may as well stay at home."
"But, she's not going as your Nan. Arwen doesn't really know us very well, so Michelle told her she could bring someone with her. She asked Éowyn."
"Well, I suppose if Mom's OK with it. So, there's only going to be 7 of us?"
"Unfortunately, yes. Nobody else was free tonight."
"Oh well, we can still have fun. Does Dad know I'm going?"
"Dad?" Tracey said, confusedly.
"Yes, Legolas, remember him? The one who's marrying Mom? My stepfather?"
"I know who you mean, but I didn't think you were being serious when you said you were going to call him 'Dad'."
"Why not? Look, I could understand your confusion if I gave a stuff about my real Dad, but I don't. I've never met him and I don't plan on it, but if I ever do, I certainly won't be calling him Dad. Legolas is way cooler! As far as I'm concerned, LEGOLAS is my dad."
"Fair enough."
"Ooh, crap! I've just had a thought!"
"Did it hurt?"
"Shut up! What am I going to wear?"
"I'll sort you with something. Don't worry about it."
At 8 o'clock the following evening, the seven women were gathered in Michelle's living room (Michelle and Robyn had now moved back in).
"So, where are we going 'Chelle?" said Mary-Jo.
"Why have you started calling me 'Chelle?" she said.
"Because Tafi says it and I like it. 32 years of 'Michelle' can get a bit boring."
"Are you saying I've got a boring name?"
"No, I'm saying it gets boring after 32 years. I like your name, but I just felt like a change. You don't mind me calling you 'Chelle, do you?"
"No."
"Good, now I say it again, where are we going?"
"Ask Arwen. She's taking us to some of her regulars." Robyn, Mary-Jo, Tracey and Kathrine gave her weird, shocked looks. Éowyn knew she went clubbing.
"What?" said Arwen, innocently. "What did you think I did in my spare time? Knit? Being married to a King isn't all it's cracked up to be, you know. He's rarely at home, so I occupy myself in Minas Tirith's clubs. Only the best, of course. And only with the fittest men. We'll go to Neon, Excels and, possibly, The Works. I like them, not too expensive."
"You really are a slag at heart, aren't you?" chuckled Éowyn.
"I would never cheat on Aragorn." She said, firmly. "I just like a good time. What's wrong with that? Anyway, shall we go?"
They made their way to the East of the City, renowned for its nightlife. All the best clubs were there, as well as some of the worst. Each club had had at least 1-hour long queues, and Michelle couldn't be doing with that. She walked up to the front of the queue for Neon, to speak to the bouncer.
"Excuse me, mate." She said, sweetly. "Is there any chance of us, you know, just slipping on the quiet?" The bouncer looked at her as if she was vermin. 'He'll regret that.' Thought Robyn.
"I'm going to give you to the count of ten to get to the back of the queue. 1. 2." 'He's for it now.'
"I'm sorry. I don't think you know exactly who we are. Let me introduce us to you. Firstly, there's me. I'm Michelle. As in, the Michelle that's daughter of the Prince of Ithilien, very good friends with King Aragorn and who is marrying one of his best friends. Legolas Greenleaf of Mirkwood, if you were wondering. Elvish royalty, very powerful. Then, there's my daughter, Robyn. The Robyn I went into labour with in the middle of King and Queen's wedding, and who's, also, closely related to the King. There's Mary-Jo, the woman who destroyed the Ring of Power. Yes, it was she. Here is Lady Éowyn, wife of Faramir, Prince of Ithilien, my stepmother. My best friend Tracey, no title but she's my friend, so there. Kathrine, Kathrine as in, Kathrine of the High Council of Gondor. And lastly, Queen Arwen." More and more blood drained from the bouncer's face as she went through the list of titles. When she finally reached Arwen, his mouth fell open. He was very embarrassed at trying to have stopped the Queen from entering the club. So, he muttered a very flustered apology and personally escorted them inside. Once settled inside, Arwen turned to Michelle.
"You know that was all very unnecessary. You could have just said Queen to start with and we'd have been in much sooner."
"I know." Said Michelle, happily. "But, I like bragging that I know all these famous people." Arwen laughed. 'Typical Michelle.' She thought. 'Constantly thinking of her status.'
By this point, it was 9:30 and none of them were drunk yet. So they went up to the bar (it was surprisingly quiet) and Michelle ordered a double vodka and orange for each of them. It took each of them approx. 10 seconds to down the drinks through thin straws and they were served every couple of minutes. So, after ½ hour, they were all quite tiddly. Well, all except Robyn. The drink just wasn't affecting her. The other six were getting more and more drunk. Robyn hadn't actually drunk as much as they had, but normally, she'd still already had enough to, make her forgetful, unbalanced and voluptuous. It was weird.
She glanced around the busy room. There were people dancing and drinking and having a good time. She felt out of place. 'Well, might as well check out the talent in this place. See if I can catch anyone's eye.' But, no such luck. All the nice blokes were either taken or staring at some other woman. Except one. 'Ooh, he's nice.' She thought. 'But, he looks sure of himself. He knows he's good looking. That's never a good thing. I can't be doing with cocky gits like that.' There was a boy, probably about 17, standing in the far corner, looking at her. She span around to face the bar and stared at the rows of spirits and liquors in front of her. 'Crap! How embarrassing! He saw me looking at him. Oh well, I'll probably never see him again, anyway, and he looks too arrogant for my liking.' Content with that thought, she turned her attention to trying to get a drink. The bar was getting busier, and took her about ten minutes to be served. Finally, one of the bartenders came over to her.
"And what can I do for you, little lady?" he said, flirtatiously. She wasn't impressed. He was about twice her age.
"Vodka and orange." She said, flatly, hoping he'd take the hint and go away. But he didn't.
"Are you sure that's all you want?" he said, whilst placing a hand one hers. She quickly pulled it away and shot a dark look at him.
"She asked for a drink, didn't she?" came a voice from behind her. Robyn turned around and saw that the lad from across the room was standing behind her. The bartender shot him a bitter look and walked away.
"I can handle myself, you know." She said. He stood looking at her. "Do you want something?" 'Why do men always think they have to save the 'damsel in distress'?' she thought. 'Girls can kick arse much better than men, why don't they just leave us to it?'
"Well," he started, "You see, I couldn't bear to see a pretty girl sitting here, alone, so I decided to come over and say hi."
"I'm not alone." She said, dryly. "I'm here with my m-" she was about to say mom, when she realised how lame it sounded, despite how close they were "-mates." It wasn't exactly a lie. Tracey and the others were her friends.
"Well, they're not very good mates, are they? They've left you here at the bar, on your own. Come one, at least let me buy you a drink. My name's Ash, by the way."
"Well, Ash, I'm afraid I have eyes for only one other." She said, mock apologetically. "I don't know who that other is yet, but he certainly isn't you. Excuse me." She stood up and walked to the toilet. There she found Mary-Jo, who was the least drunk, beside Robyn. Robyn told her what had happened at the bar and what she said (which made Mary-Jo laugh) but what she said wasn't helpful.
"That's great! 'Chelle's been going on at you, for ages, to look for a boyfriend. Maybe you can finally make her happy! Go back out there, go on, say something to him."
"Shut up, Mary-Jo. Look, don't tell mom, OK? All she'll do is embarrass me. She's bad enough when she's sober, let alone when she's drunk. So, just keep quiet!"
"No problem." Mary-Jo replied. "I don't even know where she's gone, so I can't tell her anything." Robyn gave her a dismissive wave and walked back into the club. 'If I can just find Arwen or Nan, I can keep away from Ash."
"At least tell me your name." 'Shit.' He was standing right next to her. She sighed with annoyance. There was no escaping him.
"If I tell you, will you leave me alone?"
"No, it'll probably make me more determined." He flashed a grin at her and she couldn't but laugh.
"I'm Robyn." She said. 'There, it's done. There'll be no getting away from him, now!'
"Robyn? I've heard that somewhere. Oh well, it's a pretty name. It suits you." She smiled, shyly, and could feel the heat growing in her cheeks. 'Thank Eru it's dark in here!' "Can I buy you a drink?"
"Sure, why not? Whatever I have tonight doesn't seem to affect me. I can't get drunk, it's not fair."
"Well, we'll have to sort that out, won't we?"
*****
A/N: That was a long chapter, but I won't apologise because apparently long chapters are good. So, what's Robyn going to do. Get a drink and ditch him? Get a drink and stay with him? Not get a drink at all because he's an arsehole and wants her for one thing? I don't know. Not at the moment anyway. OK, well I think for a bit then write the next chapter! Luvs Elfie xXxXx