Well, it seems to have taken forever for me to write this fic. I seem to be
having trouble over where to take it. Not feeling very inspired or
motivated at the moment. Anyway I finally got this chapter done and
hopefully I'll get finished soon.
Carter was sure that everyone was starting to give up on her. If it had been a patient of his then he probably would have done by now too. But this was Abby. His Abby. And he refused to believe that he could lose her. If she didn't wake up soon though, he was convinced that he would go mad. He'd lost so many people in his life; his brother, Lucy, and then Mark. He knew that he couldn't cope if he lost Abby as well. From the moment he had seen her fall, he had been terrified. He knew that he would always partly blame himself for this happening. He still felt responsible for Lucy's death. But this was worse, this time he wasn't even hurt at all. He was sat here fine while.And not for the first time he broke down in tears.
Then:
Carter wasn't sure how long he had stood there, not moving. When he finally did snap out of it, he took the steps two at a time, dropping to the floor at Abby's side. Terrified, he gently checked for a pulse. Finding one, he breathed for the first time since it had happened. He wanted to hold her, but sense kicked in. He knew that she could have injuries to her back and neck so moving her wouldn't really be a good idea. He glanced around helplessly. Her head was bleeding pretty heavily from where she had struck it during the fall. He cursed himself when he realised that he had left his cellphone in the car. He was reluctant to leave her but knew that he needed to go and get help. He knew that Susan would come to look for them if Abby didn't return from her break, but he knew that there was a chance Abby could die before then. Ignoring the sharp pain in his back, he made a run down the steps towards the ER.
"What the hell happened?" As soon as he heard, Luka had charged to help in trauma one. Carter and Malik were already there.
"Your patient attacked her! Pushed her down the stairs!" Carter was starting a central line.
"My patient?" Luka moved to the other side of the gurney, taking the ultrasound Chuny had just brought in and began to check for internal bleeding. "What patient?"
"You got many psychotic patients today?" Carter asked angrily. "Guy called Holdsworth."
"Where is he now?" Carter didn't reply. "Did you call security?"
"I've been a little busy! Can we focus on Abby for a moment, please?"
Luka didn't look up from the ultrasound. "Malik, can you let them know? And Chuny, call surgery." As Malik left the room, he called after him "And send some more help in here."
"Finished." Carter moved to look at the ultrasound screen. "How bad is it?"
"We need to get her up to the OR now."
"Pressure's dropping." Chuny yelled.
"We need to intubate." Carter started to move.
Luka placed a hand on Carter's shoulder to stop the younger doctor. "I'll do it! I think you should stand back. Let me help."
Carter shook off Luka's hand. "You? It's your fault she's here in the first place!" "Carter, calm down, ok?"
"Calm down?" Carter pushed Luka in the chest. "Don't keep telling me what to do! She doesn't need your help, she's got me!"
"And where exactly were you when this guy attacked her?" Luka pushed him back now.
"Hey guys!" Chuny tried to get their attention. "This really isn't the time for this!"
Carter suddenly snapped. He drew his fist back and hit Luka in the face, catching the Croatian by surprise. Luka lost his balance and staggered backwards nearly crashing into Susan who had just entered the trauma room. She simply shook her head at Carter and joined Chuny. "What happened?" Assessing the situation quickly, Susan began to intubate.
"She was pushed down the stairs." Chuny filled her in. "Corday's on her way down."
Luka muttered something in Croatian, feeling his right eye beginning to swell shut. He glared at Carter. Carter was still angry and glared back. Susan glanced at Chuny for an explanation but the nurse just rolled her eyes. Susan sighed. "That's it. Get out! Both of you! Neither of you is helping Abby here, so get out."
Luka didn't bother to argue, pushing the trauma room door a little too forcefully in frustration; going to cool off outside felt like a good idea. Carter though didn't move. "Carter, go!" she ordered.
With a last glance at Abby, he left but only moving to outside the room. He stood watching but when Corday arrived he couldn't take anymore and sat down on the floor opposite the room.
He sat there not moving. Malik had returned, saying something to Carter as he passed, but Carter didn't register the words. He just sat there. Weaver had come to talk to him, but again it was all a blur. He vaguely remembered her trying to get him to move into the lounge but he had just stayed sat there. He didn't even move when they transported Abby up to the OR. Chuny and Corday went with her. He just watched, only standing up when Susan walked out of the trauma room.
"We managed to stabilize her. There's a lot of internal bleeding, but Corday seemed hopeful."
Carter took a deep breath. "What about the head trauma?"
Susan looked at the floor. "It was pretty extensive as you saw. How bad it is, we can't say yet. You know how this is, Carter. We're just going to have to wait and see."
Carter nodded, fighting back tears. "She'll be ok. You'll see!" The words were more to convince himself than Susan. She nodded.
"I'm going up to the OR."
"Well, my shift's over. What time are you supposed to be on?"
"Erm, not till eight."
"Then I'll go with you now, and then I'll come back to cover your shift tonight."
They began to walk, then Carter suddenly stopped. "Susan," he paused. "Thanks!"
"Don't worry about it. I plan on making sure that you work back any shifts that I work for you."
Carter shook his head. "Not just about the shift. I mean in the trauma room. If me and Luka had carried on arguing then."
"Don't think about stuff like that. She stands a good chance!"
"If she wakes up!"
Susan didn't reply. She couldn't lie to Carter and she couldn't handle agreeing with him out loud right now. The two of them headed up to the OR in silence.
Now:
He sighed when he thought about how he had acted recently. He had managed to avoid speaking to Luka since the trauma room, but eventually he knew he would have to apologise. He smiled as he thought about how Abby would have reacted to him hitting Luka. He took hold of her hand, bringing it gently to his lips to kiss it. Keeping hold of her hand, he muttered to himself a phrase that had become his only comfort in the past days, "We're going to be ok!"
Carter was sure that everyone was starting to give up on her. If it had been a patient of his then he probably would have done by now too. But this was Abby. His Abby. And he refused to believe that he could lose her. If she didn't wake up soon though, he was convinced that he would go mad. He'd lost so many people in his life; his brother, Lucy, and then Mark. He knew that he couldn't cope if he lost Abby as well. From the moment he had seen her fall, he had been terrified. He knew that he would always partly blame himself for this happening. He still felt responsible for Lucy's death. But this was worse, this time he wasn't even hurt at all. He was sat here fine while.And not for the first time he broke down in tears.
Then:
Carter wasn't sure how long he had stood there, not moving. When he finally did snap out of it, he took the steps two at a time, dropping to the floor at Abby's side. Terrified, he gently checked for a pulse. Finding one, he breathed for the first time since it had happened. He wanted to hold her, but sense kicked in. He knew that she could have injuries to her back and neck so moving her wouldn't really be a good idea. He glanced around helplessly. Her head was bleeding pretty heavily from where she had struck it during the fall. He cursed himself when he realised that he had left his cellphone in the car. He was reluctant to leave her but knew that he needed to go and get help. He knew that Susan would come to look for them if Abby didn't return from her break, but he knew that there was a chance Abby could die before then. Ignoring the sharp pain in his back, he made a run down the steps towards the ER.
"What the hell happened?" As soon as he heard, Luka had charged to help in trauma one. Carter and Malik were already there.
"Your patient attacked her! Pushed her down the stairs!" Carter was starting a central line.
"My patient?" Luka moved to the other side of the gurney, taking the ultrasound Chuny had just brought in and began to check for internal bleeding. "What patient?"
"You got many psychotic patients today?" Carter asked angrily. "Guy called Holdsworth."
"Where is he now?" Carter didn't reply. "Did you call security?"
"I've been a little busy! Can we focus on Abby for a moment, please?"
Luka didn't look up from the ultrasound. "Malik, can you let them know? And Chuny, call surgery." As Malik left the room, he called after him "And send some more help in here."
"Finished." Carter moved to look at the ultrasound screen. "How bad is it?"
"We need to get her up to the OR now."
"Pressure's dropping." Chuny yelled.
"We need to intubate." Carter started to move.
Luka placed a hand on Carter's shoulder to stop the younger doctor. "I'll do it! I think you should stand back. Let me help."
Carter shook off Luka's hand. "You? It's your fault she's here in the first place!" "Carter, calm down, ok?"
"Calm down?" Carter pushed Luka in the chest. "Don't keep telling me what to do! She doesn't need your help, she's got me!"
"And where exactly were you when this guy attacked her?" Luka pushed him back now.
"Hey guys!" Chuny tried to get their attention. "This really isn't the time for this!"
Carter suddenly snapped. He drew his fist back and hit Luka in the face, catching the Croatian by surprise. Luka lost his balance and staggered backwards nearly crashing into Susan who had just entered the trauma room. She simply shook her head at Carter and joined Chuny. "What happened?" Assessing the situation quickly, Susan began to intubate.
"She was pushed down the stairs." Chuny filled her in. "Corday's on her way down."
Luka muttered something in Croatian, feeling his right eye beginning to swell shut. He glared at Carter. Carter was still angry and glared back. Susan glanced at Chuny for an explanation but the nurse just rolled her eyes. Susan sighed. "That's it. Get out! Both of you! Neither of you is helping Abby here, so get out."
Luka didn't bother to argue, pushing the trauma room door a little too forcefully in frustration; going to cool off outside felt like a good idea. Carter though didn't move. "Carter, go!" she ordered.
With a last glance at Abby, he left but only moving to outside the room. He stood watching but when Corday arrived he couldn't take anymore and sat down on the floor opposite the room.
He sat there not moving. Malik had returned, saying something to Carter as he passed, but Carter didn't register the words. He just sat there. Weaver had come to talk to him, but again it was all a blur. He vaguely remembered her trying to get him to move into the lounge but he had just stayed sat there. He didn't even move when they transported Abby up to the OR. Chuny and Corday went with her. He just watched, only standing up when Susan walked out of the trauma room.
"We managed to stabilize her. There's a lot of internal bleeding, but Corday seemed hopeful."
Carter took a deep breath. "What about the head trauma?"
Susan looked at the floor. "It was pretty extensive as you saw. How bad it is, we can't say yet. You know how this is, Carter. We're just going to have to wait and see."
Carter nodded, fighting back tears. "She'll be ok. You'll see!" The words were more to convince himself than Susan. She nodded.
"I'm going up to the OR."
"Well, my shift's over. What time are you supposed to be on?"
"Erm, not till eight."
"Then I'll go with you now, and then I'll come back to cover your shift tonight."
They began to walk, then Carter suddenly stopped. "Susan," he paused. "Thanks!"
"Don't worry about it. I plan on making sure that you work back any shifts that I work for you."
Carter shook his head. "Not just about the shift. I mean in the trauma room. If me and Luka had carried on arguing then."
"Don't think about stuff like that. She stands a good chance!"
"If she wakes up!"
Susan didn't reply. She couldn't lie to Carter and she couldn't handle agreeing with him out loud right now. The two of them headed up to the OR in silence.
Now:
He sighed when he thought about how he had acted recently. He had managed to avoid speaking to Luka since the trauma room, but eventually he knew he would have to apologise. He smiled as he thought about how Abby would have reacted to him hitting Luka. He took hold of her hand, bringing it gently to his lips to kiss it. Keeping hold of her hand, he muttered to himself a phrase that had become his only comfort in the past days, "We're going to be ok!"