Title: Always
Chapter: #9 – I need someone to hold on to…
Author: Nevoreiel (lamort_noir@hotmail.com)
Pairing: Draco/Harry
Rating: R just to be safe, dark content, rape, non-concentual sex, coerced sex, violence, some language, and questionable behavior, but I like it that way. :) It WAS supposed to be NC-17, but shh, don't tell anyone ;).
Summary: Draco can't sleep so he decides to wander. To his surprise he finds Harry at the Astronomy Tower. A fight ensues and the consequences bring out strange emotions.
Disclaimer: The characters in no way, shape, or form ever did, are, or will belong to me. The twisted storyline belongs to me though. J.K. Rowling would not be caught dead writing such things. No money is made of this and who would want to pay for something like this?
Warning: The only warning would be that if RAPE and NON-CONCENTUAL SEX between the same genders make you faint, then DO NOT READ. This story is SLASH (male/male relationship); the R rating is for a reason.
Notes: The chapter title comes from NIN "Pretty Hate Machine" CD; the song is titled "Terrible Lie". (I promise the next chapter will derive its title from some other CD though can't promise that it won't be NIN.) FF.net is getting on my nerves SO to solve the problem I've decided to make a website for my writing, yay. And no one can tell me what my fics should contain and shouldn't contain, feels good to be free. Also the potion mentioned is completely made up by me, I'm sure that no such thing will be mentioned in the HP books. This is Harry's point of view.
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Why can't I get the image of Malfoy leering at me in that dark closet, all that shadow and light play has confused my brain permanently?
And why does Snape keep glaring at me, like he's waiting for me to blow up something. At the rate I'm going this thing that's supposed to be looking like a potion just might blow up.
Hermione elbows me in the ribs as I almost overturn my cauldron onto myself by leaning on its rim. The prospect of getting a shrinking potion onto myself isn't so bad at least I'd be too small to be bothered with. Well, yes then there'd be one less Gryffindor for Snape to bother with and who wants to relieve that slimy git.
"Mr. Potter," argh that tone of voice makes me want to punch something, anything," I was not aware that the potion was supposed to be green."
"It's isn't, Professor, but it is all the same," oh fuck, I shouldn't have said that. Snape looks like he's the one who's going to explode. I really need to learn to keep my mouth shut. It gets me into trouble almost as much as I myself do.
"Detention, Potter, and ten points from Gryffindor. You shall learn respect as well as learn the correct way to brew this particular potion. I'll net let you out until it's perfect. I'll make sure that it's perfect unless you would like me to test it on you." He is positively fuming. Instinctively looking over to Draco's seat I notice him smirking and suddenly I feel even angrier, if that could be possible.
"Be sure to meet me here precisely at eight, I will not tolerate lateness." with a final withering glare he twirls around and is off to torment someone else. My sickly green potion starts bubbling unpleasantly and Hermione glancing sympathetically at me motions for me to extinguish the fire.
Ah, potion be damned. Malfoy will have me crawling around like a maggot soon. Why can't I get him out of my head? He could have bewitched me, no that idea is preposterous. But so is the idea that I'm actually feeling something other than pure animosity. Why does he have to be such a good actor? Maybe he isn't acting at all!!!
At that though I jerk back to reality and in the process spill the sickening contents of my cauldron. Hoping against hope that I didn't concoct anything lethal I find it very amusing that moss and other greenery springs up on my table and the floor. Ron actually starts snickering behind his hand; I'm very tempted to join him when Snape's shadow falls on me.
"What is the meaning of this, Potter?" he does not look too angry but his voice is icy. I feel like crawling under my desk as the Slytherins burst out laughing at my inadequate potion.
"Maybe it's a good thing I did not make you drink it. Ten more points off Gryffindor. You really should take some lessons from Longbottom at least he managed to keep his atrocity in the cauldron." Stretching his thin lips in a grimace that is supposed to be a smile he rips a small shrub off my table. "You are responsible for cleaning up this mess, stay after class, and I don't want to see one leaf left after you're done."
Ron and Hermione look downright sad as they leave me to my work, Ron even mouths an "I'll see you later."
Sighing audibly I start with the table and work my way down throwing the shrubbery and grass into a bucket that seemed to have no bottom, no matter how much grass and dirt I threw into it there was always space for more. This work reminds me too much of the many times I was forced to prune the garden at Privet Drive.
My back aching and my hands soar from all the work I finally make my way out of the damp dungeons, only to remember that I have to go back there for my detention. Today's not my day.
***
"Harry, the potion isn't that hard to make. Remember, just concentrate on what you're doing and you should do all right." Hermione's pep talk does not make me feel any better. I just smile weakly at her.
"I'm sure that Snape won't make you drink it. He's not that bad," Ron tries to give me a cheerful smile but it wavers a bit.
"Don't worry guys, even if he does make me drink the results won't be something Madame Pomfrey can't fix." Hopefully. Yeah, here I go. "I better go now while I'm still not late."
"Yes, Harry, just concentrate," Hermione waves reassuringly as I step out of the common room.
The trip to the dungeons is even mote unpleasant then when Ron and Hermione are by my side. How can the Slytherins sleep down here, I'd come down with a cough my first day.
Cautiously I knock on the slightly ajar door a low "Come in" answers me.
Snape is sitting behind his desk and there's a distinct smile of delight, very uncharacteristic, on his face. "Glad to see you here, Mr. Potter." While his face speaks something completely different.
Motioning towards the table right opposite his desk he says, "You'll find all you need on this table, now get to work. And I hope to see it done better than your previous attempt."
Working with Snape glowering at me all the time's even worse than when there are other's to take away his attention. I almost spill everything again but save it just in time catching his attention and getting a vicious frown. I'm very relieved to see that this time it's the right color. I think Hermione's right, when you actually concentrate on making the potion it turns out all right, at least better then when Malfoy's on my mind. Argh, there I go thinking of him again. That never brought me any good and I'm almost done with the potion, just one more minute of simmering and then I'm free.
With difficulty I battle off the images of Malfoy and finally Snape is testing the potion. With surprise he finds out that it actually works. Very reluctantly he says, "Better than last time but you still need to work on it."
That isn't as bad as could've been, "Can I go now?"
"Yes, you may. But next time I won't let you off this easy." With another scowl he sits back down at his desk.
Very relieved I race out of the room but once in the hall skid to a stop as I spot Malfoy. What he doing here? Ha, what a silly question, his dormitory is down here. But what is he doing out so late? Now that's a good question. Time to find out.
Carefully making my way after him I see that he's in no hurry but knows where he's going. As silently as I can I move a little closer, would do no good to loose sight of him now. Stopping in front of a portrait he calls out the password "Quidditch Cup", presumably for his dormitory. The portrait swings open to let him in and then swings shut.
After a minute or so I walk up to it. I notice that the occupant of the painting is looking at me strangely but once I say the password it opens without a word. Malfoy isn't on the common room and to my luck neither is anybody else.
Taking a quick look around I notice that their common room looks about the same as ours except for the different colors. There is a staircase down, how dreary. Stepping lightly I follow it down.
Coming to a fork I decide to go to the right as it turns out that the girl's dormitories. Backtracking I turn left this time and I am rewarded by a sign that says 5th years. Slowly opening the door, very relieved that it doesn't creak, I peak in. There are four beds just as in out dormitories. And seems that everyone's asleep or at least not walking about.
Tentatively I walk in, treading on the green carpet, and carefully close the door. The click sounds too loud and I'm afraid that I woke someone up but it's only a snore.
On tiptoes I walk up to the nearest bed and pear at the name on the trunk, "Gregory Goyle", nope, not who I was looking for at all. After checking all of them I find that Malfoy's bed is all the way in the corner. Figures that it'd be the last one I check.
Parting the curtains I look in. Malfoy seems to be sleeping soundly. Hmm, didn't take him much time to fall asleep. Reaching in I brush away a few stray hairs before I know what's happened Malfoy had me around the wrist and with a yank I tumble onto the bed.
Quite efficiently he mutters few spells including a silencing charm and Lumos. I'm still a little shaken not to mention shocked to find myself on top of Malfoy!
As I keep staring he smirks, "Glad you could drop in, Harry, I was wondering when Snape would let you go."
Quite suddenly I realize that I've been following Malfoy and now I'm in his bedroom, on his bed and on his lap! How could I have been so foolish? I think the git has planned this all along. Even saying the password loudly enough for me to hear. Oh, now I'm in trouble. But first I need to get off his lap.
Hurriedly I back away to edge of the bed, crawling awkwardly. Malfoy's smile is growing ever wider. "What? I don't bite."
"I don't trust you, Malfoy, any farther than I can throw you." This was such a bad idea from the start. I have to get out of here. Inconspicuously I edge to the side, hoping that Malfoy doesn't notice in the weak wand light.
"Well, you won't know until you try." The lilt to his voice made it a completely lewd comment and I blush furiously. Hoping yet again but this time that Malfoy doesn't notice. Nothing like a little humiliation to add to his insult vault. I slide a little more to the right.
"What, Harry? Cat got your tongue?" noticing my escape route he slides closer and leans in, his breath caressing my cheek. I'm frozen to the spot and the insistent little voice inside my head that tells me to run for my life before things get beyond my reason is more than slightly squashed.
"No, not at all. But I really have to go now." I squeak the last word as I suddenly feel Malfoy's hand on my crotch. He never gives up, does he? He has a one track mind. Quickly I push the offending hand away. "Don't get too comfortable with me, Malfoy, I'm leaving." To punctuate the point I start to get off the bed.
"So, my speech had no effect on you?" I'm quite surprised that he does not try to stop me and I pause with one foot already on the floor, the curtains parted.
"Probably not the effect you wanted it to have. Why should I feel guilty when it's you who's in the wrong? You should have never started this." Actually I think has speech made me feel very guilty, damn his eloquence.
"So, leave already. All you do is talk and tease anyway!" with a huff he settles back onto his pillows, hair falling over his eyes very fetchingly.
Now this has gotten to me, how dare he call me a tease! "I don't tease and I wouldn't be here in the first place if it wasn't for your head games."
"Excuse me, my head games, you came here yourself nobody invited you." He does look good, doesn't he? Argh, have to snap out of that state of mind.
"Yes, your head games of power. That's what you want isn't it?" I hiss.
He looks taken aback but recovers quickly. "It doesn't matter what I want I won't get it anyway."
"Well, you're probably not going about it the right way." This is actually keeping me here, what a fool I really am. Bravery go to hell.
The look in his eyes is predatory, extinguishing the light with a muttered word, and the look is gone, and everything is thrown into shadows. Confused by the sudden darkness I'm surprised by Malfoy's sudden attack upon me.
Just like all the other numerous attacks he tries to smother me with his lips. Pushing him away forcefully I gasp for breath. Before I can regain my bearings sufficiently he's at it again this time adding his hands to the mix. He breaks away every once in a while to catch a great big mouthful of air and then clamps his mouth over my own. This is getting old.
Either because of the great hurry he seems to be in or of his own inadequacy he fumbles continuously with his own clothes. As he keep rubbing up against me I find my body betraying me. How dare it betray me?!
Sensing a change in me Malfoy slows his pace and sensuously nuzzles my neck. How can I let it go so far? It's getting out of hand! I really should've left when I threatened to. My own curiosity will be my downfall. But is it really that bad? Now, no more thoughts of that nature, I hate this, right? Right!?!
While my thoughts run around in mad race my body knows what it wants. Wrapping my arms around the insufferable, but at the moment tolerable, blonde, I press closer to the delicious heat his body gives off. The friction is addictive and my hands roam freely eliciting small gasps and groans from Malfoy. But he's not the only one contributing to the symphony of sound.
Finally on the brink of pleasure I reach my climax. Hanging on limply to Malfoy as he thrusts a few more times and then too relaxes, I will my heart to slow down before it bursts.
Feeling slightly uncomfortable with the quickly cooling stickiness in my pants I move away from the immobile body next to me. Somewhere in our "going ons" we got horribly tangled in the blankets and I find a pillow under my foot.
Malfoy breaks the silence, still sounding breathless, "Well, that was certainly different."
"You can say that again." Lifting my head slightly I catch sight of Malfoy's hair. It's sticking up everywhere but he still manages to look fetching. I can't help but burst out laughing.
With a wicked smile Malfoy points out my own disheveled state and we share out mirth. Muttering some other spell that he seems to know many of and I feel much cleaner.
"Thanks, I needed that. But now it's time for me to go. My friends will probably think Snape fed me the potion and is torturing me horribly." Smoothing my hair to no avail and sit up.
"He does seem the type, doesn't he? But, no, stay for the night. I need the company. I need someone to hold on to." Grabbing my wrist he pulls me back down alongside his own body, wrapping an arm around my waist.
I open my mouth to give an excuse but he just shushes me. "Don't worry; I won't do anything you wouldn't want me to do."
I study him skeptically, "But in the current position I'm not sure what I want."
"All the better for me." The hint is overly implied and some anger returns.
"Sod off, Malfoy." I cross my arms over my chest, awkwardly but still, and try to look menacing. Doesn't work out.
"This is a start of a beautiful relationship." Malfoy states, stretching his arms above his head and shoving me in the ribs.
I nudge him right back, smiling inwardly. This actually turned out better than I expected. What a day. "Can we still be enemies?" a stupid question, I know, but one that I need an answer to if I'm to stay sane.
"Always." Comes his reply.
Always, hmm, good enough for me.
The End.
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A/N: Credit has to be given to the line "This is the start of a beautiful relationship," which is from "Casablanca". :) The long chapter is to make up for the very long break I've had. Sorry that it took me so long to spit this one out, it's not even proof read yet (which I will do soon), school drains me, stupid me had to take two extra English classes. Like the advanced literature class wasn't enough. If I fail any of those classes it'll be no one else's but my own fault. Now enough of the rant. :)
Comments, your own rants? Should I even bother with a sequel? Was the romance just too much? Was the very vague sexual description just plain frustrating? FF.net exasperates me, how could you possible get rid of all the NC-17 fics!!! :( But if they don't catch on too quickly I'll be able to post more with the R rating. Kenna Hijja: Thank you for such a comment, hmm, I'll have to work on the punctuation, I don't exactly notice it when I'm typing away.