a/n: Now for everyone waiting for a Spikey/Buffy moment, here it is.
******
"In exactly twelve hours we will go in," Giles said rubbing the bridge of his nose.
Everyone nodded.
"So I suggest sleep," Oz said yawning.
"I agree," Cordelia said stretching, "Where?"
Giles rubbed his glasses.
"Well I suppose that Cordelia and Angel could take my bed. I'll sleep on the floor. Then there's a pull out couch in the living room. Buffy…"
Buffy shook her head, "I am going to work out some down here in the gym. I don't think I can sleep."
Giles raised his eyebrow, but he didn't say anything. He knew better than to attempt to contradict Buffy.
"I couldn't sleep anyways," Buffy said giving him a smile.
"Want someone to kick your ass, Slayer?" Spike asked coming from one of the stacks.
Buffy snorted, "You and what army?"
Spike gave her his devilish grin, "Just me. That's all I'm going to need."
Angel growled and Giles cleared his throat.
"I think that you two should keep it to low key sparring," Giles pointed out, "I need both of you in top form."
Spike looked at Buffy.
"We'll do something relaxing," Spike said ginning.
****
"I think I could sleep now," Buffy said laying on the mat. The session had lasted an hour and both parties were sweaty and a bit worn.
Spike was laying next to her. He groaned and pulled himself on to an elbow and looked at her. She moved her head and looked at him. Her neck was fully exposed to him. He could see the marks that he left on her. Her green eyes examined him.
"We have never really talked about what happens when you get her back," Buffy said quietly.
Spike examined her, he looked at her from head to toe.
"She's been my companion for over a hundred years," Spike began. He saw Buffy's face fall. He decided to begin again, "We march in there tonight for different reasons. I started out just wanting to kill the little guy, now I have a reason for revenge."
Spike watched as she pulled away emotionally. She looked at him bravely, "We will get her back."
Spike watched her and suddenly he felt like he was dying. Not in the good way. He was dying and falling and miserable.
"Buffy what are you doing to me?" he asked her, his voice raw, "I've flirted and I've fucked. I've never cared about anyone."
She pulled herself so she was facing him she traced his face. There were smooth contours and sharp angles. She ran her finger over the planes and valleys.
"I've been afraid all of my life that I wasn't good enough to love because they all leave, even though I wanted it to work so bad. Well they left in my world. Now I'm here and I'm scared that the one guy that I never gave half a chance will leave because I never really wanted it."
Spike looked at her, he cupped her face.
"Luv, you know you've never been rotten to me."
"Yeah I have," Buffy said quietly, "I know that I don't deserve it, but I want a chance."
Spike looked at her with caring and as if she was insane.
"Slayer, this is crazy," Spike told her, his voice straining, "I live in the shadows. You live in the sunshine. After tomorrow what do we have in common."
Buffy sat up and sat Indian style. She looked at him defiantly.
"I've lived in the sunshine and I wasn't happy. Don't you go all 'normal life' on me."
Spike pushed himself up, "I'm a vampire," he argued.
"You're Spike," Buffy countered.
He opened his mouth, but he couldn't think of anything to say to that. They just sat in a comfortable silence.
"Have we met before," he asked playing with her fingers. It seemed wrong not to touch her. She was so warm.
"Yeah, in my dreams," Buffy said watching his fingers trace the hills and valleys of her knuckles.
"See that isn't it luv, I think it started before then. I have this dream where you're dancing. You have the Great Goofy Couple with you. I watch you from the shadows and I feel it. There's always recognition when I see you. Fighting isn't to do harm, it is a way to find synchronicity. You fight like me, I fight like you."
"Dancing," Buffy whispered.
Spike traced the bones in her hand. Buffy shivered involuntarily.
Then he stopped.
His eyes widened, "The recognition, every time I see you. It's not recognition. I'm in love with you every time I see you."
Buffy began to shake. She should have known. He was always honest with her, well kind of.
He got up and grabbed a towel. He began dabbing at his face. It was a useless gesture, but one that drew his attention from the fact that he was confused and turned on.
"That is just it, you just keep fighting it. You use me and I'll always be beneath you. You never forget what I am."
Buffy shook her head and walked over to him. She needed to touch him. They hadn't touched for thirty seconds, she couldn't stand the separation.
She looked up at him, "I will never forget what you are. You are a total package. I love that package."
Spike's face couldn't have looked more shocked if she had suddenly revealed that she was a man. He swallowed hard. Buffy was afraid that he swallowed his tongue.
"Don't do what I did and get so wrapped up in the 'we can't' and 'we shouldn't'. There is a million reasons that we shouldn't be together. I can give you a list like you wouldn't believe, but we don't follow rules. Quit fighting me, it would all be really simple. Can you imagine what it would be like not to fight the internal battles of what the social norm. What would happen if we just let it happen."
Her eyes were looking up at him, begging. Wanting him to believe that they could work out.
Spike attempted to use his mouth, but nothing came out on the first few tries. He blinked repeatedly.
"I…did…was that sayin' that you love me."
Buffy nodded.
Spike smiled impishly, "Say it again."
"What!" Buffy said laughing.
Spike pulled her to him, "I've just never heard you say it."
"I love you."
Spike closed his eyes and tilted his head back, he smiled.
He pulled her to him. He was not going to let go until he had made her his.
Buffy held on just as tight to him.
The world went on outside of the basement. People slept in the house, people went to work outside in the sun. The Anointed One sat smiling at Drusilla who thought he was the cutest thing.
The intangible problems swirled around Sunnydale as they always did.
For once Buffy didn't notice. She could only the coolness of the vampire above her. Her skin was flushed and she was too hot to notice anything but the wonderful sensations across her breasts and every sensitive point on her body.
Spike was amazed at the warmth that his body emitted to his. Everything was felt so good for him, even the nails of her fingers digging into his biceps.
There were no walls put up between them.
It was the most pleasurable feeling that either had ever known.
****
******
"In exactly twelve hours we will go in," Giles said rubbing the bridge of his nose.
Everyone nodded.
"So I suggest sleep," Oz said yawning.
"I agree," Cordelia said stretching, "Where?"
Giles rubbed his glasses.
"Well I suppose that Cordelia and Angel could take my bed. I'll sleep on the floor. Then there's a pull out couch in the living room. Buffy…"
Buffy shook her head, "I am going to work out some down here in the gym. I don't think I can sleep."
Giles raised his eyebrow, but he didn't say anything. He knew better than to attempt to contradict Buffy.
"I couldn't sleep anyways," Buffy said giving him a smile.
"Want someone to kick your ass, Slayer?" Spike asked coming from one of the stacks.
Buffy snorted, "You and what army?"
Spike gave her his devilish grin, "Just me. That's all I'm going to need."
Angel growled and Giles cleared his throat.
"I think that you two should keep it to low key sparring," Giles pointed out, "I need both of you in top form."
Spike looked at Buffy.
"We'll do something relaxing," Spike said ginning.
****
"I think I could sleep now," Buffy said laying on the mat. The session had lasted an hour and both parties were sweaty and a bit worn.
Spike was laying next to her. He groaned and pulled himself on to an elbow and looked at her. She moved her head and looked at him. Her neck was fully exposed to him. He could see the marks that he left on her. Her green eyes examined him.
"We have never really talked about what happens when you get her back," Buffy said quietly.
Spike examined her, he looked at her from head to toe.
"She's been my companion for over a hundred years," Spike began. He saw Buffy's face fall. He decided to begin again, "We march in there tonight for different reasons. I started out just wanting to kill the little guy, now I have a reason for revenge."
Spike watched as she pulled away emotionally. She looked at him bravely, "We will get her back."
Spike watched her and suddenly he felt like he was dying. Not in the good way. He was dying and falling and miserable.
"Buffy what are you doing to me?" he asked her, his voice raw, "I've flirted and I've fucked. I've never cared about anyone."
She pulled herself so she was facing him she traced his face. There were smooth contours and sharp angles. She ran her finger over the planes and valleys.
"I've been afraid all of my life that I wasn't good enough to love because they all leave, even though I wanted it to work so bad. Well they left in my world. Now I'm here and I'm scared that the one guy that I never gave half a chance will leave because I never really wanted it."
Spike looked at her, he cupped her face.
"Luv, you know you've never been rotten to me."
"Yeah I have," Buffy said quietly, "I know that I don't deserve it, but I want a chance."
Spike looked at her with caring and as if she was insane.
"Slayer, this is crazy," Spike told her, his voice straining, "I live in the shadows. You live in the sunshine. After tomorrow what do we have in common."
Buffy sat up and sat Indian style. She looked at him defiantly.
"I've lived in the sunshine and I wasn't happy. Don't you go all 'normal life' on me."
Spike pushed himself up, "I'm a vampire," he argued.
"You're Spike," Buffy countered.
He opened his mouth, but he couldn't think of anything to say to that. They just sat in a comfortable silence.
"Have we met before," he asked playing with her fingers. It seemed wrong not to touch her. She was so warm.
"Yeah, in my dreams," Buffy said watching his fingers trace the hills and valleys of her knuckles.
"See that isn't it luv, I think it started before then. I have this dream where you're dancing. You have the Great Goofy Couple with you. I watch you from the shadows and I feel it. There's always recognition when I see you. Fighting isn't to do harm, it is a way to find synchronicity. You fight like me, I fight like you."
"Dancing," Buffy whispered.
Spike traced the bones in her hand. Buffy shivered involuntarily.
Then he stopped.
His eyes widened, "The recognition, every time I see you. It's not recognition. I'm in love with you every time I see you."
Buffy began to shake. She should have known. He was always honest with her, well kind of.
He got up and grabbed a towel. He began dabbing at his face. It was a useless gesture, but one that drew his attention from the fact that he was confused and turned on.
"That is just it, you just keep fighting it. You use me and I'll always be beneath you. You never forget what I am."
Buffy shook her head and walked over to him. She needed to touch him. They hadn't touched for thirty seconds, she couldn't stand the separation.
She looked up at him, "I will never forget what you are. You are a total package. I love that package."
Spike's face couldn't have looked more shocked if she had suddenly revealed that she was a man. He swallowed hard. Buffy was afraid that he swallowed his tongue.
"Don't do what I did and get so wrapped up in the 'we can't' and 'we shouldn't'. There is a million reasons that we shouldn't be together. I can give you a list like you wouldn't believe, but we don't follow rules. Quit fighting me, it would all be really simple. Can you imagine what it would be like not to fight the internal battles of what the social norm. What would happen if we just let it happen."
Her eyes were looking up at him, begging. Wanting him to believe that they could work out.
Spike attempted to use his mouth, but nothing came out on the first few tries. He blinked repeatedly.
"I…did…was that sayin' that you love me."
Buffy nodded.
Spike smiled impishly, "Say it again."
"What!" Buffy said laughing.
Spike pulled her to him, "I've just never heard you say it."
"I love you."
Spike closed his eyes and tilted his head back, he smiled.
He pulled her to him. He was not going to let go until he had made her his.
Buffy held on just as tight to him.
The world went on outside of the basement. People slept in the house, people went to work outside in the sun. The Anointed One sat smiling at Drusilla who thought he was the cutest thing.
The intangible problems swirled around Sunnydale as they always did.
For once Buffy didn't notice. She could only the coolness of the vampire above her. Her skin was flushed and she was too hot to notice anything but the wonderful sensations across her breasts and every sensitive point on her body.
Spike was amazed at the warmth that his body emitted to his. Everything was felt so good for him, even the nails of her fingers digging into his biceps.
There were no walls put up between them.
It was the most pleasurable feeling that either had ever known.
****