Hello! welcome back. anyway, on with the painful confession.
I…sob…don't…sob…own…sob…CCS…sob…or…sob…CC…sob…sob!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
On with the chapter while I try to find some tissues.
Sakura's life is tangled and broken. The Ghost returns to her every night and she can't escape his clutches.
Along comes a stranger, handsome, cool, he is Sakura's only way out. While Sakura chases the Shadows of her Past, Syaoran Li is determined to chase her.
A Father. A daughter. A stranger. And unspoken secrets.
It was early morning. A golden sunrise had streaked across the sky, melting into the soft oranges and yellows on the horizon. A large yellow house stood on a crisp green hill, a long path leading the way from house to road at the base of the hill. Past the road was a dense wood, one of the largest in the country, surrounded by fields of corn and wheat. My whole life was spent exploring those woods, escaping from reality to join some fantasy world that I was convinced the animals of the wood lived in. It was a fantasy world of laughter and fun, an easy life where there were no complications. But it wasn't reality, and every evening as the sun set I would have to return to the real world and struggle through a life where I was the black sheep. It all started on this golden sunrise. That morning seemed so innocent to my family as they waited impatiently outside the main bedroom. Natasha Avalon, my mom, was crying out. Aiden Avalon, my father, was pacing the hall. He had been through this five times already and his nervousness never got any better. My brothers and sisters were sat by the wall in a line, oldest to youngest. First there was Touya. He was nine years old and tall for his age with black hair and matching dark brown, nearly black, eyes. Being the oldest he was very protective of us and so had learned how to fight at a young age. He loved to tease us as well but he could be sincere if he needed to be. Second was Julian. He was six years old with glasses and silvery hair and warm grey eyes. He was my favourite brother, always there for everyone, never judging someone without a fair trial. I loved him dearly, but knew he would never understand my troubles. Next was five-year-old Tomoyo. She had long black hair that curled at the tips and deep amethyst eyes. She was loving and pretty, like a china doll. She was dainty with creamy white skin. When I was younger, I loved to just sit on the grass and watch her rock in a chair as she sewed beautiful dresses. She was very creative and very talented from a young age, but although she was my adopted mother, she would also not understand my secrets. Fourth was Eriol. Three years old with the darkest blue hair and blue eyes like the ocean during a storm, he was the quieter and more mysterious of my family. From the second of his birth, a smirk that had no other word but evil was plastered on his pale face. He intimidated everyone, apart from me. Last but not least, there was Meilin. She was a snobby two year old who bossed everyone about, but could have a heart when she thought it was necessary. She had jet-black hair that reached her waist and mischievous burgundy eyes. When I first saw her, even my baby instincts smelt trouble. I was always quiet when she entered the room, more than usual. I would never meet her in the eye and refused to go near her room. To Meilin, I was her slave.
They were all nervous and fidgety by the wall as mom cried out one last time, and then fell silent. There was a small baby cry and then a baby giggle. Father halted abruptly and turned towards the door as the knob turned. He wore a look of anticipation, but still a look of anxiousness lingering. The nurse opened the door and looked at Father tearfully. In an instant, everyone knew something was dreadfully wrong. Father stumbled into the room after a couple of words with the nurse. He was white faced. He gazed upon his wife, her beautiful jade eyes closed, her pale skin even paler, her body just a limp form as if some rag doll. My siblings piled into the room, not needing to ask what had happened. Mom was dead, the strain of the birth too much for her. I would never be able to decipher the pain they all felt then, only that I was the cause of it. Father was as still as a statue, his features creased into a look of pure horror and sadness. Touya took a step forward and pulled the covers a little lower, revealing the small bundle Mom was still holding. A pair of crystal green eyes stared back at them all, joy in them. The little girl giggled and held out her arms to them all, but none went to pick her up. No, they all recoiled as if they had been stung. The nurse hovered closer and placed a gentle hand on Fathers shoulder.
"Her name is Sakura." She whispered, pointing to the child who was squirming under the fearful gazes of the seven people.
I never knew then how much pain my birth had caused to my family. Only a few people showed it. Father and Meilin. Meilin's taunting did nothing to my spirit. I had grown up with it, but Father's type of torture was beyond anything I ever understood. Only when a stranger returned to our town, did our secrets begin to be caught.
It was a cold afternoon on a Tuesday. School was out for the winter as the snow had become too thick to travel. I was fifteen that day, average height with silky auburn hair that curved around my face. My eyes were glazed with unshed tears as I walked down the street. It had been fifteen years exactly since Mom had died during my birth, and even though I never knew her, the thought still brought tears to my eyes. I had photos of her. She had been a model, as beautiful as the daylight that I treasured so much. Back at home everyone was mourning. They had decorated the living room with flowers and dressed in black. I, on the other hand, had been banished from the house while the daylight lasted. Being as it was I who had killed her, everyone had agreed that it was inappropriate for me to be present. I had never celebrated my birthday, never had a present. I didn't mind not having one, but it would have been nice to know that they cared enough to make the effort. I stuffed my hands into the pockets of my coat and dragged myself through the snow. It was already knee deep, and although it wasn't snowing at that moment, it was scheduled to continue through the night. As I walked I cursed anyone who wished it were a white Christmas. No one was out. They'd be stupid to come out. But I was the black sheep. Loving nature and the thrilling sensations of the outside world. Up every morning just as the sun rose and never going home until it was pitch black. Yeah, I was the black sheep all right, everyone knew that. I was quiet and different from the girls in my school. They flirted with the boys, had practically three boyfriends a week and spent their time asking each other if they'd had sex yet. They thought I was crazy. I couldn't stand the touch of anybody, never mind boys. Just the thought made me think of returning home that night when…no, I wasn't going to think about it. I'd stop it this time, I'd cry out and Julian or Touya or Tomoyo would come in and see and I'd finally have peace at night. But I knew I wouldn't. I said that every night and I never did. If only I had the courage to speak up…
I shuddered from the cold and my thoughts. It was teatime and I was starving. I hadn't had breakfast or lunch and this was the only time I'd manage to get food. Pushing open the door to the shop, I entered. It was warm inside and smelt of herbs and fresh loafs. I breathed deeply and then made my way to the back of the shop where all the sandwiches were. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him. Unruly brown hair and intense amber eyes, the seventeen year old stood behind the counter, watching me, his features buried in a frown. I looked away and scanned the racks. I knew him. Everyone did. His name was Syaoran Li and he was part of one of the richest families in Tomoeda. But he had been gone for over five years. His mom and dad had broken up and they had all moved away. He was obviously back, but why was he working in a shop?
I selected a chicken and salad sandwich and then pulled out my money as I made my way over to the counter. He must have worked out who I was, because he was smiling at me, but still a little confusedly.
"Hi." He said. "Which on are you then?"
I was used to this question, though I could never see why anybody could get our family mixed up. Tomoyo is beautiful and Meilin is sexy, whereas I am just plain and quiet. No body ever takes any notice of me, and that's the whole point. But anyway, I was used to this question and so I ignored him. He was a lot friendlier than I remembered. My last memory of him was when Meilin was hanging onto him one day at school and he had this huge glare on his face that felt to pierce you right through the skull. He was very popular back then but never smiled.
"I know you're an Avalon," he continued. "'Cos you look like one. But which one are you? Meilin? Tomoyo?"
"Sakura." I was surprised at the sound of my voice, as I hadn't used it much lately. He blinked at me in utter astonishment and then looked me over. I didn't like being looked over like that; I wanted him to disappear from my life like everybody else did. I continued to look at the floor, hoping he would loose interest.
"Can't be." He declared finally. "You were just a dirty, skinny runt when I saw you last!"
I continued to look at the floor. I still am, I thought. Syaoran rang up my sandwich and a bottle of juice I picked from the side counter and then continued to stare at me.
Go away, I prayed silently. Just look away and forget about me.
"I'm not going to bite you know." He said gently. I still didn't look up. "Come one Sakura, look at me. I'm not a ghost."
I looked up then, amazed that he remembered. When I was younger I was terrified of ghosts, especially the Ghost that crept into my room at night. I knew better now, I knew who the Ghost was and it made my skin crawl.
"How is everybody?" he asked. I realised that I would be staying in there a long time, and so I leant on the counter. The sleeves of the coat came up and Syaoran glanced at them.
"Fine." I replied, still amazed by the sound of my voice. I didn't look him directly in the eyes, afraid that I wouldn't see his but the eyes of the Ghost. Still Syaoran's eyes strayed to my arms until he finally frowned and cleared his throat.
"Uhhh…Sakura? What's that on your arms?"
I looked down and hurriedly pulled the sleeves back down, but Syaoran caught my wrist and turned it over. He stared at the scars and cuts up my arms. I was as still as a statue. He was touching me…oh god a boy was touching me. I swallowed to stop myself from throwing up as terrible images crossed through my minds eye. The bed cold and crisp, darkness heavy in the room, the pacing footsteps outside the door, the creak as it opens and the Ghost enters, the draft as the covers are lifted and the Ghost slips in beside me. The shivers and cold hands that run across my body…no Sakura, stop it. Don't torture yourself. But still I was stiff, staring at him with such fear that he let my arm go immediately. Without waiting for him to comment, I picked up my bag and fled from the shop.
Do you like? Please review and email me, I really want to know if you do!!!!!! It'd really help. Thankyou!!!!
Mini_Deamon@btopenworld.com
Cheer me dears!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sakura_Free_Spirit