CHAPTER FORTY

THE NEWS

Padmé couldn't believe a word her husband just said.

"W...what do you mean, Anakin?", she managed to ask.

"That! That I'm leaving the order. I can't continue with this life, Padmé. We can't have a marriage based in promises and fate. I have to choose between my family and the Jedi. Well, I choose my family", he said in a loose tone.

"But Anakin, you love being a Jedi"

"Yes, but I love my family MORE than the Jedi. I'm not putting my life in jeopardy again. One year is too long, Padmé. I don't want this to happen again", he explained. Padmé sighed and leaned on her elbow.

"I know. It was very hard, but it isn't always like that. Maybe in your next mission..."

"You are always looking forward to the future, why can't you live in the present? It's good to picture the future and make plans, but you can't live stuck there forever. You are too busy figuring things out and planing things to start living your own life, Padmé", he said interrupting her. "I mean, analize this: we haven't seen each other in nine months, and I had not seen our children, except for Luke, in one whole year until today. I almost died a couple of times and now you are talking about my next mission?". Padmé rested her head on the pillow and sighed.

"Yes, you are right. I guess that I live thinking about the future because I'm a polititian...", she said. Anakin laughed and rested his head on hers. "What are you laughing about? It's true!", she said trying to hold back a smile, but she couldn't. There was complete silence for a moment, but it was broken with a sigh.

"But Ani, what will you do then? The first months will be great, like a vacation, but then you'll get bored. Can you picture yourself just walking around the house all day long forever? Won't you get tired of that life?", she asked.

"No, because I don't plan to just walk around the house forever...", he said with a mischievous smile on his face.

"And what are you planing to do?", Padmé asked curious.

"I'm going to be a pilot", he said proudly. Padmé turned around and looked at his face to see if he was just teasing her. But even if he was smiling, he was very serious.

"But Ani, you could be so much more than that!", she said, almost pleading. "You are very smart, I know that you can think of a better job than that..."

"You think I haven't think this over?", he asked smiling. "Believe me, honey. This is the best choice I could've ever made...", he said in a funny serious tone.

"Wait a minute... what kind of pilot are you going to be? Please not one of those x-wings, it's very dangerous!", she pleaded in a concerned tone.

"Do you really want to know?", he asked in a teasing mysterious tone. Padmé punched his shoulder. "Fine, fine! I'll tell you... but does everything must end up in violence?", he asked. For an answer, he got another punch from his wife. Anakin laughed. "Alright, alright... I give up!", he said defeated. Padmé smiled to herself.

"I always win...", she said teasing him.

"Yeah, and I'm getting sick of it!", he said in a childish tone he didn't know he was using. Padmé smiled. "Alright! Come here, it's a secret". Padmé's curiousity grew, and she moved closer to Anakin. "I'm going to be a murfhguhgfgrm pilot", he whispered.

"A what?", Padmé whispered confused.

"A murfhguhgfgrm pilot", he repeated.

"A WHAT?", she asked out loud.

"Shhh!, you're going to wake up the kids!", he warned.

"Alright, stop playing with me and tell me!", Padmé said impaciently. Anakin smiled.

"I'm going to be a Nubian cruiser pilot", he said with a smile. Padmé raised a brow.

"W..who's Nubian cruiser pilot?", she asked. Anakin rolled his eyes.

"Dah! Your Nubian cruiser pilot, of course. Force, you are getting slower every day...", he teased.

"Hey! Watched with the age thing, I'm warning you!", she said pointing a finger at him. Anakin laughed.

"Tell me, what do you think about it?", he asked excited. Padmé shook her head.

"I don't know...", she answered.

"Oh, come on Padmé. It'll be fun! With all your trips to Courasant, it will be easier to see each other", he explained. Padmé smiled.

"You know... I remember having this same conversation years ago. We weren't even married by then!", she said smiling.

"Well, I'm bringing up the subject again. Come on, what do you say?", he insisted.

"What about the kids?", she asked.

"I'll be with them all the time, and maybe we could take them with us, at least Kobby and Shmi, because Leia is very excited with this pilitics academy thing. Come on... I know you want me to be your pilot...", he said smiling at her. Padmé couldn't help to return the smile. "Is that a yes?", he asked tickling her on the ribs. Padmé laughed.

"Yes, but if you continue tickling me...", Padmé said between laughs. Anakin ended her agony and hugged her.

"I'm so happy that we both agree on this", he thanked cheerfuly.

"Me too", she added.

The next morning, with no previous warning, the children invaded their parents bedroom. Luckily, Padmé thought this would happen so she and Anakin got dressed to be 'presentable'...

The first one to arrive was Kobby, then Shmi and the twins after her. And they were all there, cuddled and happy that Anakin returned to them after one terrible year full with fear and doubts. It was good to know that he was home. This time, home for good. He told the children the news.

"You mean... you will no longer be a Jedi?", asked a surprised Luke.

"If that decision deppended on me, a long time ago dad would be living here with us...", Leia said with a smile.

"But you can't leave the order!", Luke said.

"Why not?", Leia asked a little annoyed.

"Because he's the Chosen One! Dad... you just CAN'T leave the order!", Luke argued.

"I believe, son, that I must make that choice, and it's settled. I'll no longer be a Jedi. I had enough of it, so has your mother", he said looking at Padmé.

"Mom, please don't tell me you agree on this with him...", Luke asked Padmé. Padmé gave him the answer with one look. Luke shook his head. "No... this is nothing like you, mom. Why are you doing this? You know that dad has a duty with the galaxy and with the Force itself, why are you ok with this?", he asked in disbelief.

"Luke, honey... this was your father's choice, and I'll support him in every decision he makes", she said smiling at Anakin.

"Besides, it will be for the best. I'll be closer to you and your mother", Anakin added.

"What do you mean 'closer' to us and mom?", Shmi asked curious.

"Well, remember when I told you that when I was a kid I was a pilot?". The kids nodded. "Well, that's going to be my new job, I'll be a pilot".

"What kind of pilot? An x-wing pilot, an attacker, which one?", Luke asked.

"No, I had enough of attacks and wars... I'm going to be your mother's pilot, starting from next week", he said proudly. Luke got out of the bed and stood right next to it.

"Please tell me you're kidding...". All he got for an answer, was a deep silence. "I can't believe you, dad! You are the most talented, powerful, skilled Jedi that has ever existed, and you are going to throw all that away to become your wife's servant?", he asked in disbelief.

"Watched, young man...", Anakin said in a hard tone, pointing a finger at Luke.

"What? You're going to hit me? Please, don't make me laugh...", he said sarcasticly.

"Luke, that's enough!", Padmé said trying to stop him.

"See? This always happens. Always mom has to speak for you, she's alway deffending you and running things by herself".

"I said that was enough, Luke", Padmé warned. Kobby got a little scared and crawled towards Leia. She hugged him and Shmi, trying to protect them and to make them feel safe. But Luke continued with his attack.

"You are... you are such a coward!", he yelled pointing at his father. Anakin stood up and grabbed him tightly by the wrist. "Oh, go ahead: break my arm. That would only proove the kind of coward you are". They look into each other's eyes. They both had the same piercing blue eyes.

Anakin was grabbing Luke with more strengh every time, never taking his eyes away from his. Luke started to feel weak in the knees. His face was turning red and his hand white. Anakin could feel his son's pain, and released him. Luke kneeled on the floor grabbing his hand. He was almost crying.

"Thanks for that happy welcome, Luke", Anakin said in a hard sarcastic tone.

Padmé was holding her children with their heads facing anywhere but Luke and Anakin. Pride took over Luke, and before the tears rolled down, he stood up and left the room still grabbing his hand. Anakin covered his face with his hands and walked towards the balcony. Padmé kissed her children and left them on the bed to follow Anakin. She saw through the window how Anakin jumped to the garden.

"Anakin!", Padmé called from the balcony. The sun was about to set, and there was still no sign of Anakin. She had wondered all afternoon where her husband could be, when she remembered a special place Anakin always went when he wanted to be alone. She headed towards the special spot.

Padmé walked by the shore of the lake until she reached the end of the beach, where a big tree stood tall and proud. It had large strong branches, very easy to climb. Padmé knew that Anakin was there. By now, she was climbing the lower branches.

//I'm too old for this...//, she thought to herself. Finaly, she reached the higher branch on the top of the tree. Anakin was there. She sat by his side and wrapped her arm around him.

"Hey...", she said with a smile. Anakin turned his head to look at her.

"How did you find me here?", he asked. Padmé's smile widened.

"I know you, Ani. Better than you know yourself, did that answer your question?". Anakin smiled and wrapped his arm around her.

"Yes, how stupid of me for not thinking of that". Padmé rested her head on his side, and Anakin's expression torn serious. "How stupid of me for almost braking my son's arm. How stupid of me for thinking that he would accept my decision. Force, I'm stupid for making that decision in the first place... Padmé, I'm so stupid...", he said almost crying. Padmé held him tightly.

"Anakin, look at me, look at me!", she commanded in a soft tone. Anakin looked at her, his eyes were red. Padmé caressed his face tenderly. "Ani, you are not stupid. Maybe your decision was a little fast and you didn't think it through... but you are definitley NOT stupid. Luke is just confused, maybe a little angry, but that's because he's too young and he hasn't even been through half the things you have. Just give him some time, alright?", she asked with a smile. "Are you sure about this decision, Ani?". Anakin sighed and shook his head.

"No, I'm not", he whispered. Padmé frowned.

"But you were so positive about it last night", she said confused.

"Well I'm not so positive about it today, alright?", he answered in a hard tone. "How am I supposed to live my life if I can't make a decision and be ok with it? It's like... I'm afraid of what people may say or may react to those decisions. I'm always afraid. No wonder Luke thinks I'm a coward...", he said hanging his head.

"Ani, please don't think like that...". Anakin raised his head and looked at her.

"And how am I suppose to think? My own son doesn't respect me, Padmé... I feel so frustrated. Now that I've changed my mind about leaving the order, how am I going to look at him? He'll think that I can't make up my mind by my own. Some terrific role model I am...". There was a deep silence after Anakin's last words.

"Anakin, do you really want to leave the order?", Padmé asked.