ÒHe was always professional, everywhere in any situation. He wanted to be a patron of the arts, but his mind swirled with military affairs. Sometimes he told me a thing or two. In those moments, I liked him and didnÕt like him.Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê ÑDSCH
Ê Ê Ê Ê IÕll apologize right now for leaving the last chapter off so abruptly. Of course that doesnÕt really matter to any reader whoÕs going to read through continuously, who doesnÕt have to take a break between chapters, but I feel a need to apologize anyway for my break. One might wonder why I took a break when I did, though. One might say I picked a very strange place to stop, that it would have been much easier to just keep writing while the topic was heated, so to speak. Well, thatÕs actually why I stopped. I sit down and write a whole chapter at once, and the last one got too heated, you know, very overwhelming. I donÕt mean in action detailsÑthere are very few of those here, you know. As I always do, I refer to the mental strain of consequences. Going into the study with Raikh, I was depressedÑyou know, I shouldnÕt have to say that againÑI thought I had no creature left on my side in the accessible world.
Ê Ê Ê Ê Some of what Raikh actually did may be known to you, or at least the biased generalization of what she did listed in official records of her Òcrimes.Ó But thatÕs all you know, and itÕs not much, youÕll agree. Official reports arenÕt lax on information; theyÕre propaganda-heavy, of course. But if you know little of the matter currently, I knew as much less as possible. I was often in the dark, so to speak, and the lights were always turned on very abruptly right in my face.
Ê Ê Ê Ê Right in front of me sat Raikh, MtsenskÕs Marshal, ZlayaÕs military commander, a strong force not to be argued with, someone to be very much feared. RaikhÕs name stood by ZlayaÕs imposingly, the last sort of presence youÕd expect to find at a concert by will. Her sturdy, uniformed physique added to the impression of one who would hold only contempt for the arts, not to mention be ignorant to them. And she was sitting at a table littered with staff paper in the middle of a music library, across from me. And, you know, she was saying she was helping me. This made no sense to meÑisnÕt help something a creature should notice? I continued my bout of silence, dropping the matter of death to consider RaikhÕs cryptic statement, staring past her and finally voicing, ÒI beg your pardon?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh gave a brief chuckle, a sound IÕd never heard from her before, and a surprisingly warm sound at that. ÒI said IÕve been helping you.Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê I blinked, then stirred into a bit more motion, giving my head a bob of a nod, sending my paws scrabbling over the desk for nothing in particular. ÒI heard you, I heard you,Ó I told her. ÒBut IÕve been wondering, so to speak, how? You know, how?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh chuckled again, her voice set with a knowing edge. IÕm fairly certain sheÕd expected me to ask the question I did. Her answer seemed practically prepared, so to speak, rehearsed, not to mention remarkably less longwinded than her previous speeches. ÒBriefly, IÕve seen to it that your concerts go on.Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê That remark puzzled me further; my mental state was not particularly stable, one might say. But that puzzlement was almost an annoyed one. Volklov had gotten my music out, the Sobarekas had organized it, Redwall had housed the performances. They were the ones that ran my concerts, just as much of a contribution as my own, as amazingly significant as the music itself. It was a wonderful institution, happened upon by those who werenÕt meant to only by wild chance. And Raikh, sitting across from me, had always been an enemy in my eyes until that evening. Even then, I resented her with crediting herself for my success. That is, I appreciated her opinions but wouldnÕt hold her for that sort of radical just yet. Still numbed, I donÕt think I quite managed a facial expression, but I repeated my previous question. ÒHow?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê ÒBy not telling what I know.Ó Another brief response from Raikh, who I always thought was no less that straightforward, even when she was longwinded.
Ê Ê Ê Ê ÒAnd what, so to speak, did you know?Ó I still wasnÕt satisfied by not knowing what Raikh knew. If I ever sounded like the prying investigator instead of the witness or defendant, it was on that night.
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh paused, as if she thought I knew exactly what she was talking about. She waited to see if IÕd let it go, so to speak, but I did nothing to indicate I didnÕt need an answer. Eventually, Raikh did catch on; she began to speak more matter-of-factly again. ÒI knew pretty much everything that was going on, actually. I showed you this study, youÕll recall, so of course I know you come in here to compose.Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê I had known that, but it had slipped my mind by then, you know. On that recollection, though, I did consider that Raikh could have told Zlaya on me any time sheÕd wanted to. And yet she hadnÕt done it. ÒBut how did you know just what I was writing in there, you know, the nature of the music?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh shrugged. ÒThat was a matter of logic. Why would you have needed a separate room from your quarters if all you were writing was stuff for Zlaya? And also, why would Volklov Varzar have been smuggling the music out of Mtsensk if it had been acceptable?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê I jolted forward, my spectacles sliding forward to the tip of my nose. ÒYou knew about Volklov?!Ó The concept of Raikh being in on that as well baffled me.
Ê Ê Ê Ê ÒI knew all too well,Ó Raikh explained. ÒHis secret exit is right by my quarters. I disciplined him rather severely onceÑZlaya made me do it when she caught him leaving after sheÕd visited me. That punishment is why he has such a bad opinion of me. ZlayaÕs order was that Volklov died if he was caught using that exit again. I watched him go often, though, and just didnÕt report it.Ó Raikh paused for a deep breath, slightly wavering. ÒHe died...the guards were put there right after the whole mess with Broken-Sword Warrior. Zlaya had her suspicions, and wouldnÕt let him pass. SheÕs been rather displeased with me since then for not watching close enough.Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê There was silence again; I think it was a moment to VolklovÕs memory. But also for my consideration. I interrupted the still again, wondering this time, ÒAnd did you know about the Redwall concert, you know, the first one? Did we really go there for the concert?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh sighed, looking down. ÒYes and no...That is, we went that specific day because thatÕs when the concert was, and thatÕs why I brought you, but I would have gone anyway for other reasons. ZlayaÕs wanted Redwall under MtsenskÕs control for a very long time. The reason that I knew about the concert is that weÕd sent a small party of scouts to Redwall to have a look. They heard about the concert and told me. When the time came for there to be a negotiations visit, I had us go on that date. Because of the concert, though, no negotiating actually happened, and that didnÕt please Zlaya at all. ThatÕs why she went to Redwall herself; it was coincidental that she showed up when the opera was on. But because it was on that day she got there, she was through with the negotiation stage. Zlaya is going to Redwall again, Mitya. And sheÕs going with soldiers this time, without my consent. SheÕs going to go in and act like sheÕs simply negotiating, but then the abbey will be attacked from all four sides. She told me all about this, but she wonÕt hear my say.Ó Raikh sounded almost like she was pleading, and it alarmed me almost more than what she actually said.
Ê Ê Ê Ê You probably know what would have happened to Redwall, but not from that dialogue. Like with VolklovÕs fate, accounts of that evening in the study are dumbed down, so to speak, twisted, told only in part, and hit with a different angle and color of light. ItÕs a very rosy light thatÕs commonly seen, though the actual hue was a much deeper red. As much as I hate to do it, as much as itÕs painful to go on, I have to continue, and IÕm going to darken that filter into the true colors.
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh had taken me to the study hurriedly, youÕll recall, and sheÕd not closed the door all the way. Though our conversation started at a low level, the nature of the revelations involved dragged the volume upwards. Now, IÕm making assumptions in saying that Zloyevich probably called ZlayaÕs attention to the hubbub in the main hall, and then brought her toward where Raikh had dragged me. ItÕs also only a guess as to how long sheÕd waited outside the door, but it was very apparent that Zlaya had been eavesdropping from the brisk manner she burst through the door in alone.
Ê Ê Ê Ê What occurred next was oddly disjointed, almost in frames, so to speak. One might say it was a surreal experience, moving at first in slow motion but the aftershock rushing on faster than a creature can comprehend, let alone calculate. IÕll go at it panel by panel, then. Not a word was uttered in the slow motion, not even a conscious sound was made until realtime life returned. Just suddenly, there was a dagger in ZlayaÕs paw, and then, as abruptly, the same blade appeared in RaikhÕs back. The rat staggered back and slammed down onto the ground; then the world rushed on again. I leapt back, trembling uncontrollably. Zlaya retrieved her dagger; the spray of blood on her blue-streaked fur gave it an odd violet sheen. Raikh twisted on the floor, tilting her head upward in a final effort. If no other line in this whole memoir is a verbatim quote, I remember RaikhÕs last words. ÒZlaya Trudnaya, IÕm going beyond Hellgates...thatÕs for certain, but...I wonÕt see you there. YouÕre...going somewhere...far...worse...Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê As RaikhÕs eyes glazed over, Zlaya cast the dagger lightly onto the table, the blade just missing smearing appropriate blood on the score of my quartet. Zlaya glanced at it passively, as if what sheÕd just done was no big deal. And then her cold, dark, empty eyes fell on my pathetic, trembling form. I was thinking I was next; I was surprised that blade hadnÕt found its way into my back. Well, that was as cohesive of a thought as I could piece together just then, and I think my physical position fairly screamed those thoughts.
Ê Ê Ê Ê ÒIÕm going to Redwall in a few days,Ó Zlaya said, disturbingly casually. ÒYouÕre coming with me. They like you there. YouÕll play for them, and itÕll help.Ó Not waiting to see if I had any sort of responseÑand I didnÕt, I was far too terrified to even squeakÑZlaya strolled out.
Ê Ê Ê Ê For IÕm not certain how long I leaned back against a wall, my chest heaving, my eyes wide. When I finally pried myself off of the wall, I staggered over to the table, staring down at my quartet score and the dagger. IÕd gone from wanting to die to being in awe I was alive that night, but prospects still didnÕt look good. When IÕd finally realized another friend, she had to go and be killed like that. I thought IÕd been left alone after VolklovÕs death, but with RaikhÕs brutal murder, I was absolutely by myself. Evgeny and Venyamin were out of reach, Bolt held nothing but disgust, and Redwall was going to have some of its own problems. I knew exactly what they were, and therefore knew how they might be stopped, but only if Redwall had fair warning. And that was the problem.
Ê Ê Ê Ê I stared at the dagger and the score longer, squinting moist-eyed through my spectacles. That was when I decided what I needed to do.
Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê Ê ÑDSCH
Ê Ê Ê Ê IÕll apologize right now for leaving the last chapter off so abruptly. Of course that doesnÕt really matter to any reader whoÕs going to read through continuously, who doesnÕt have to take a break between chapters, but I feel a need to apologize anyway for my break. One might wonder why I took a break when I did, though. One might say I picked a very strange place to stop, that it would have been much easier to just keep writing while the topic was heated, so to speak. Well, thatÕs actually why I stopped. I sit down and write a whole chapter at once, and the last one got too heated, you know, very overwhelming. I donÕt mean in action detailsÑthere are very few of those here, you know. As I always do, I refer to the mental strain of consequences. Going into the study with Raikh, I was depressedÑyou know, I shouldnÕt have to say that againÑI thought I had no creature left on my side in the accessible world.
Ê Ê Ê Ê Some of what Raikh actually did may be known to you, or at least the biased generalization of what she did listed in official records of her Òcrimes.Ó But thatÕs all you know, and itÕs not much, youÕll agree. Official reports arenÕt lax on information; theyÕre propaganda-heavy, of course. But if you know little of the matter currently, I knew as much less as possible. I was often in the dark, so to speak, and the lights were always turned on very abruptly right in my face.
Ê Ê Ê Ê Right in front of me sat Raikh, MtsenskÕs Marshal, ZlayaÕs military commander, a strong force not to be argued with, someone to be very much feared. RaikhÕs name stood by ZlayaÕs imposingly, the last sort of presence youÕd expect to find at a concert by will. Her sturdy, uniformed physique added to the impression of one who would hold only contempt for the arts, not to mention be ignorant to them. And she was sitting at a table littered with staff paper in the middle of a music library, across from me. And, you know, she was saying she was helping me. This made no sense to meÑisnÕt help something a creature should notice? I continued my bout of silence, dropping the matter of death to consider RaikhÕs cryptic statement, staring past her and finally voicing, ÒI beg your pardon?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh gave a brief chuckle, a sound IÕd never heard from her before, and a surprisingly warm sound at that. ÒI said IÕve been helping you.Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê I blinked, then stirred into a bit more motion, giving my head a bob of a nod, sending my paws scrabbling over the desk for nothing in particular. ÒI heard you, I heard you,Ó I told her. ÒBut IÕve been wondering, so to speak, how? You know, how?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh chuckled again, her voice set with a knowing edge. IÕm fairly certain sheÕd expected me to ask the question I did. Her answer seemed practically prepared, so to speak, rehearsed, not to mention remarkably less longwinded than her previous speeches. ÒBriefly, IÕve seen to it that your concerts go on.Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê That remark puzzled me further; my mental state was not particularly stable, one might say. But that puzzlement was almost an annoyed one. Volklov had gotten my music out, the Sobarekas had organized it, Redwall had housed the performances. They were the ones that ran my concerts, just as much of a contribution as my own, as amazingly significant as the music itself. It was a wonderful institution, happened upon by those who werenÕt meant to only by wild chance. And Raikh, sitting across from me, had always been an enemy in my eyes until that evening. Even then, I resented her with crediting herself for my success. That is, I appreciated her opinions but wouldnÕt hold her for that sort of radical just yet. Still numbed, I donÕt think I quite managed a facial expression, but I repeated my previous question. ÒHow?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê ÒBy not telling what I know.Ó Another brief response from Raikh, who I always thought was no less that straightforward, even when she was longwinded.
Ê Ê Ê Ê ÒAnd what, so to speak, did you know?Ó I still wasnÕt satisfied by not knowing what Raikh knew. If I ever sounded like the prying investigator instead of the witness or defendant, it was on that night.
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh paused, as if she thought I knew exactly what she was talking about. She waited to see if IÕd let it go, so to speak, but I did nothing to indicate I didnÕt need an answer. Eventually, Raikh did catch on; she began to speak more matter-of-factly again. ÒI knew pretty much everything that was going on, actually. I showed you this study, youÕll recall, so of course I know you come in here to compose.Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê I had known that, but it had slipped my mind by then, you know. On that recollection, though, I did consider that Raikh could have told Zlaya on me any time sheÕd wanted to. And yet she hadnÕt done it. ÒBut how did you know just what I was writing in there, you know, the nature of the music?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh shrugged. ÒThat was a matter of logic. Why would you have needed a separate room from your quarters if all you were writing was stuff for Zlaya? And also, why would Volklov Varzar have been smuggling the music out of Mtsensk if it had been acceptable?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê I jolted forward, my spectacles sliding forward to the tip of my nose. ÒYou knew about Volklov?!Ó The concept of Raikh being in on that as well baffled me.
Ê Ê Ê Ê ÒI knew all too well,Ó Raikh explained. ÒHis secret exit is right by my quarters. I disciplined him rather severely onceÑZlaya made me do it when she caught him leaving after sheÕd visited me. That punishment is why he has such a bad opinion of me. ZlayaÕs order was that Volklov died if he was caught using that exit again. I watched him go often, though, and just didnÕt report it.Ó Raikh paused for a deep breath, slightly wavering. ÒHe died...the guards were put there right after the whole mess with Broken-Sword Warrior. Zlaya had her suspicions, and wouldnÕt let him pass. SheÕs been rather displeased with me since then for not watching close enough.Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê There was silence again; I think it was a moment to VolklovÕs memory. But also for my consideration. I interrupted the still again, wondering this time, ÒAnd did you know about the Redwall concert, you know, the first one? Did we really go there for the concert?Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh sighed, looking down. ÒYes and no...That is, we went that specific day because thatÕs when the concert was, and thatÕs why I brought you, but I would have gone anyway for other reasons. ZlayaÕs wanted Redwall under MtsenskÕs control for a very long time. The reason that I knew about the concert is that weÕd sent a small party of scouts to Redwall to have a look. They heard about the concert and told me. When the time came for there to be a negotiations visit, I had us go on that date. Because of the concert, though, no negotiating actually happened, and that didnÕt please Zlaya at all. ThatÕs why she went to Redwall herself; it was coincidental that she showed up when the opera was on. But because it was on that day she got there, she was through with the negotiation stage. Zlaya is going to Redwall again, Mitya. And sheÕs going with soldiers this time, without my consent. SheÕs going to go in and act like sheÕs simply negotiating, but then the abbey will be attacked from all four sides. She told me all about this, but she wonÕt hear my say.Ó Raikh sounded almost like she was pleading, and it alarmed me almost more than what she actually said.
Ê Ê Ê Ê You probably know what would have happened to Redwall, but not from that dialogue. Like with VolklovÕs fate, accounts of that evening in the study are dumbed down, so to speak, twisted, told only in part, and hit with a different angle and color of light. ItÕs a very rosy light thatÕs commonly seen, though the actual hue was a much deeper red. As much as I hate to do it, as much as itÕs painful to go on, I have to continue, and IÕm going to darken that filter into the true colors.
Ê Ê Ê Ê Raikh had taken me to the study hurriedly, youÕll recall, and sheÕd not closed the door all the way. Though our conversation started at a low level, the nature of the revelations involved dragged the volume upwards. Now, IÕm making assumptions in saying that Zloyevich probably called ZlayaÕs attention to the hubbub in the main hall, and then brought her toward where Raikh had dragged me. ItÕs also only a guess as to how long sheÕd waited outside the door, but it was very apparent that Zlaya had been eavesdropping from the brisk manner she burst through the door in alone.
Ê Ê Ê Ê What occurred next was oddly disjointed, almost in frames, so to speak. One might say it was a surreal experience, moving at first in slow motion but the aftershock rushing on faster than a creature can comprehend, let alone calculate. IÕll go at it panel by panel, then. Not a word was uttered in the slow motion, not even a conscious sound was made until realtime life returned. Just suddenly, there was a dagger in ZlayaÕs paw, and then, as abruptly, the same blade appeared in RaikhÕs back. The rat staggered back and slammed down onto the ground; then the world rushed on again. I leapt back, trembling uncontrollably. Zlaya retrieved her dagger; the spray of blood on her blue-streaked fur gave it an odd violet sheen. Raikh twisted on the floor, tilting her head upward in a final effort. If no other line in this whole memoir is a verbatim quote, I remember RaikhÕs last words. ÒZlaya Trudnaya, IÕm going beyond Hellgates...thatÕs for certain, but...I wonÕt see you there. YouÕre...going somewhere...far...worse...Ó
Ê Ê Ê Ê As RaikhÕs eyes glazed over, Zlaya cast the dagger lightly onto the table, the blade just missing smearing appropriate blood on the score of my quartet. Zlaya glanced at it passively, as if what sheÕd just done was no big deal. And then her cold, dark, empty eyes fell on my pathetic, trembling form. I was thinking I was next; I was surprised that blade hadnÕt found its way into my back. Well, that was as cohesive of a thought as I could piece together just then, and I think my physical position fairly screamed those thoughts.
Ê Ê Ê Ê ÒIÕm going to Redwall in a few days,Ó Zlaya said, disturbingly casually. ÒYouÕre coming with me. They like you there. YouÕll play for them, and itÕll help.Ó Not waiting to see if I had any sort of responseÑand I didnÕt, I was far too terrified to even squeakÑZlaya strolled out.
Ê Ê Ê Ê For IÕm not certain how long I leaned back against a wall, my chest heaving, my eyes wide. When I finally pried myself off of the wall, I staggered over to the table, staring down at my quartet score and the dagger. IÕd gone from wanting to die to being in awe I was alive that night, but prospects still didnÕt look good. When IÕd finally realized another friend, she had to go and be killed like that. I thought IÕd been left alone after VolklovÕs death, but with RaikhÕs brutal murder, I was absolutely by myself. Evgeny and Venyamin were out of reach, Bolt held nothing but disgust, and Redwall was going to have some of its own problems. I knew exactly what they were, and therefore knew how they might be stopped, but only if Redwall had fair warning. And that was the problem.
Ê Ê Ê Ê I stared at the dagger and the score longer, squinting moist-eyed through my spectacles. That was when I decided what I needed to do.