Chapter 6

By Cai

***

He grins at me, then says, "I, Harry, am implementing my 'Great Revenge Plan' on Flitwick!"

I gape.

I know I do.

His Great Revenge Plan?

I laugh.

"How juvenile can you *get*?"

His smile falters and fades.

It's replaced by ice.

Thank god.

I can deal with a cold, heartless, Malfoy-like Draco.

I can't deal with a cute one.

Or a sweet one...

Or one that tastes like whipped cream and chocolate.

Damn deserts to hell.

They should not make me think of drizzling chocolate down his chest...

And then licking it off...

Or licking *any*thing off him...

Or licking him off...

I nearly wince...

But that would show him how off kilter I am...

My mental self rolls his eyes and comments, "Like you could be any *more* obvious about it..."

I lock my mental self in a tiny box at the back of my mind and throw away the key.

Who needs a mental self, anyway?

"Thank you very much, Mr. I'm So Fucking Mature."

Oh dear.

Well...at least I can handle him...

I hope...

"Whatever...um..."

I pause.

"So articulate," he drawls.

"Shut up..."

I scowl.

Damn.

This is so petty!

I can do better than this...

But he *kissed* me...

Draco Fucking Malfoy kissed me...

This is beyond real.

"As I said, Mr. Maturity."

"Oh come off it," I say, trying desperately to *not* think about how that could be taken...

Or how Draco would *take* anything...

Shit...

He arches his eyebrow at me.

I pray...

He opens his mouth, and I can tell he's going to say something, and then I will either have to run or smash his teeth in...

And he has such pretty teeth...

Oh fuck...

I have to say something before him...

"So, what exactly does this plan entail?"

"Glue."

"Glue?"

"Yes. Lots of glue."

"Um...why?"

"Because, Potter...the little man has to stand on all those *books* while he's teaching...and what better way to get back at him for humiliating me...er...*us*...than to embarrass *him*..."

"Well, yes...but what does *glue* have to do with it?"

"I'm going to put a spell...or two..." his eyes glint, "Or maybe a few more...on the books...so first his feet will stick...and then he'll fall...and the rest of the books will fall on top of him--no, don't look at me like that! One of the spells is for a soft landing and another for light books--and the pages of the books that fall open on him will stick. For a *very* long time."

"Draco...don't you think it would be better to maybe...put a bucket of Zonko's Super-Sticky Troll Drool above his door or something? The Drool will stick for far longer, and it basically hardens on contact..."

"Ah, but Harry," he says, and I don't think he even realizes he's not calling me Potter anymore, "That is not *public*..."

"But it would be if there were some way to make the whole school see it..."

"The whole school?"

"Well, yeah..."

"How would we do that?"

"What if we did it before he walked in the Great Hall?"

"Harry?"

"Yes?"

"Are you sure you're not a Slytherin?"

"Um...well..." I think about telling him I almost was...but I decide that would just complicate things..."No, definitely not..."

He looks at me for a moment, then says, "You say it like it'd be a bad thing..."

And his voice sounds different...

And good God...no! Not *again*!

I shake my head...

I was so close...

I was almost cleared of dirty little thoughts...

"But I'm thinking the Zonko's Super-Sticky Troll Drool is a good idea...just...how would we work it so it only hit him? We don't want everyone else to get splattered...or worse yet, for it to hit someone else entirely..."

"True..."

"We could...be watching and drop it specifically on him..."

"That should work..."

I pause...

Wait...

How did *I* get drawn into this???

But it does sound rather...appealing...

"What happens if we get caught?"

"Well," he says, "We could pretend to fight..."

"Pretend?"

Silence falls.

For seven years we have fought.

No pretending was needed.

But now?

Now this odd...

Strange...

Unexpected truce has come between us...

Grown and taken hold...

And I don't really *want* to fight any longer...

I tilt my head looking at him...

He shrugs, not looking at me.

"Yeah, sure. Why not? Besides, who'd ever think of *us* working together?"

Who indeed.

"So, how's this going to work?"

He looks at me for a moment...

"I think it would be best," he says, "For us to be situated close to each other just outside the hall..."

"I can see that working."

"Right. So we'll be out there...and when he walks by, down with the bucket of Drool."

"Right...now...*why*, exactly did you have to take the grating down?"

"Oh..." he looks at the grating still in his hands. "I had to get into his room to put the spells on the books somehow, didn't I?"

"Climbing through the ventilation ducts?"

"Well...Fred and George do it all the time!"

"Yeah, but they're Fred and George. It's different."

He nearly glares at me.

"And I'm Draco Malfoy, so I can't climb through the ventilation ducts?"

I open my mouth to say, "No, you are *not* allowed to crawl through the ventilation ducts," but something holds me back.

I shrug.

"You know, you look like a fish when you do that..."

The inner voice I have locked away in the back of my mind in the teeny tiny box makes a valiant effort to break free...good thing I threw out the key...

I'd be tempted to let him out and scathe Draco with my sarcastic wit...

But I'd probably get burned to cinder in the process...

The funny thing about inner voices is, they rag just as much on you as on other people...

"Thanks, Draco. Thanks a *whole* bunch."

"What?"

I shake my head again.

"Nevermind. Why don't you put the grating back?"

"Good idea..."

He stands on the toilet seat again and turns to replace the grating.

I turn, unlock the stall door, and run from the room.

As I turn the corner a voice floats down the hall, calling, "Meet me here tomorrow...same time..."

"Oh, wonderful," I think as I race down the hall to the dorm room...

But I can't help smiling slightly as I pass through the corridors...

Despite the fact that what I'm doing is decidedly wrong...

It's also going to be decidedly fun...