I wake up, feeling numb. Shouldn't I be missing Ian? He said he loved me, and I said I loved him. Shouldn't I be feeling something? Did I really not care about him? Or am I just a horrible monster?

I look around to see where I am. I'm in the hallway, where I fell earlier. My sisters are sitting on my bed, looking down on me. I'm still groggy. Why did I pass out? I see the shattered remains of the ceramic puppy and remember the note - such horrible words.

I think back, trying to remember the exact words. My memory is fuzzy. It said something about death. What did it say? I look toward the floor. I remember it saying that I hadn't learned my lesson yet.

I look to Blossom, and she knows what I want. She reads the note back to me, "You stupid girl. You don't learn, do you? I told you never to tell anyone about our secrets. I know you have been talking, Bubbly. You don't know how mad that makes me. Your sisters have to die for this. It is the only way you will learn." I look to my sisters after she finishes reading. They look back at me, speechless.

What have I done to get everyone into this kind of mess? I just want everyone to be happy. The police arrive at our house. We make sure they know everything that we know. I'm very scared. The police look at me as a victim, not as a person. I see the way they look at me, as if I can't take care of myself - as if I think my problems are better than anyone else's. They don't understand. I can take care of myself. They just won't let me try.

The police leave, and a feeling of dread washes over me. I wonder where Jake has been this whole time. I walk upstairs and knock on Buttercup's door. She invites me in, and I open the door to see her and Jake. Jake has this nervous look on his face. He looks at me with a look that is begging me to leave.

I ask Buttercup, "Did you want me to bring you two up any lunch?" just as a way to leave quickly. Jake seems like a nice guy, but the look on his face made me want to leave. Buttercup tells me no, and I nod. I smile at her, and walk back out of the room.

On the other side of the door, I hear Buttercup say, "That was weird." I walk down the hall to Blossom's room and walk in. I tell her that I don't want to be alone right now, and sprawl out on her floor. I just want to cry. I want her to give me a hug and tell me that everything is fine - that there is nothing to worry about, but she can't. She is sitting at her desk, writing in her journal. She knows I'm in the room, but her journal is important to her. She likes to get her feelings down while she is feeling them, instead of after.

She finishes writing and turns to me. She smiles at me, shakily. She has really pretty teeth. I notice stupid things like that, at bad times like these. I can't speak. She holds up her index finger, to tell me to hold on one second. I can tell that she is trying not to cry. She stands up and walks to her perfectly organized closet. Her clothes are actually alphabetized by color.

She comes back out of her closet with a game - a board game. For some reason, a board game sounds really good right now. I want to be the blue piece, so I reach for it. Blossom cuts me off as she grabs for the red piece. We both giggle sharply, remembering when we were kids. We were always red and blue, and Buttercup was always green.

I look up at her wall clock and realize we've been playing for an hour. I go to take my turn, and I hear a shout - a loud shout. Buttercup is very mad. She only shouts like that when she's very mad. I look at Blossom. She makes a very worried face at me, and we both stand up to investigate.

We hurry into Buttercup's room to find her yelling at Jake, "You didn't think it was stupid? Why would you do that to a person? What is your problem? You tell me something like that, and then claim that you love me? I don't even know how... argh!" Buttercup just got bored of telling Jake off. I wonder what she was talking about. It was obviously bad. Neither of them have noticed that Blossom and I have entered. Finally Buttercup looks in our direction, and begins to rant about what a fool he is.

"Buttercup, calm down, start from the beginning. Jake, sit down. We're not through with you" Blossom can be very bossy sometimes.

"Jake just told me that he only went out with me originally because of a bet. He told me that he and Ian were going to try to make us hate each other. Then I guess he realized he actually liked me as a person, and tried to back out of the deal. Ian got mad and said that he would do it himself. To make matters worse, I guess Jake still has been helping Ian out here and there. So, I don't know what to think. There I go rescuing him, and well, it's all his fault to begin with!" Buttercup turns to Jake and glares after she finishes speaking.

I don't know what to think. I thought Jake was a good guy. How could he be helping Ian? I try to work all this out in my head. I don't understand how people can be so mean - so heartless. I turn back to Buttercup and say, "Maybe he didn't realize what he was doing."

Jake pipes in, "You guys don't have to talk about me as if I'm not here, you know. It's rather rude."

"Can it, jerk boy. You have no right to tell us we're being rude." Blossom must really be angry - usually she at least comes up with an intellectual insult. I don't think I've ever heard her tell someone to "can it" either.

Jake doesn't speak; I'm sure he felt the anger in her voice. Blossom looks at him and smirks proudly. Buttercup looks around the room, probably looking for a murder weapon - luckily, she can't find any. I stand near them all, watching, and waiting. Will they ask me to help them do anything? I hope they do, but they probably won't. I want to be a part of my own life for once.

Blossom and Buttercup both turn to Jake and simultaneously ask, "What else do you know? What will he do next?"

Jake stares at them both for a moment and says that he can't tell them. "I can't betray a friend's trust like that. I'm sorry girls, you're on your own for this one. I know, Buttercup, you hate me. There's nothing I can do about that. I screwed up, and I'm going to leave now. You're strong, Buttercup; you'll make it through this." Jake finishes his speech, and walks out of the room.

We all watch him leave. There is nothing we can do. It almost looks like Buttercup is about to cry. She stutters a simple, "B - b - b - but... h - he... I..... he can't do that!" Buttercup actually starts sobbing. I don't know how to react. I've never seen her cry as hard as she is crying now. Big, fat tears roll down her cheeks, and Blossom immediately rushes to her side.

Blossom mouths to me that I should leave. She doesn't want me to upset Buttercup. I walk to Buttercup, and give her a hug, and walk back out of the room. I head downstairs, to look out the windows to the street. I look out, and all I see is Jake on the ground. He seems to be bleeding, and isn't moving. I scream for help, and Professor races outside. I race to the phone, to call the paramedics. I just hope we can help him.