Dawn was in a very sore mood as she ate her breakfast in solitude. And not without reason, as Buffy and Tara had kept her up all night long. And judging on the type of sounds they were making, it wasn't because of an all-night session of Parcheesi. This is all Buffy's fault, thought the teenager angrily as she ate her cereal in solitude. "Why does Buffy always have to ruin everything?"

"Is something wrong, Dawnie?" Willow walked over to the girl, hugging her supportively. "You know, if you talk to your sister, you might be able to work things out."

Dawn was incredulous. "Work things out!?! Willow, Buffy is in her bed with your girlfriend! And I bet they're naked, too!" Dawn shuddered with disgust for a moment before she said, "I think we're well past the 'working things out' stage, don't you?"

Willow was able to find some humor in the situation. In fact, she was laughing right at the younger Summers sister with no regard to Dawn's feelings at all. "Dawn, I don't *have* a girlfriend. That's not to say I wouldn't *mind* having one, but that's this really long conversation about my tendencies, which I don't feel like talking about, because I don't have a girlfriend and it's best if we leave it at that."

Dawn couldn't believe her ears. "But....But what about Tara?" The onetime Key refused to give up on her friends like this, especially Willow and Tara. Not after all they had done for her. "But you're in love with her, remember? She's the love of your life."

Willow couldn't help but laugh again, still unaware of just how much she was hurting her best friend's sister. "Dawn, of course I love Tara; she's not only my magic partner, but she's a great friend. But she's hardly the love of my life."

Now in tears, Dawn realized that whatever was affecting Tara and Buffy was now spreading to Willow. "Something's wrong with you," she said as she fearfully backed away from the redhead.

"How can you say that?" asked Willow defensively. "Nothing is wrong with me, Tara, or your sister. Now come over here, and we'll talk about what's been bothering you lately. Then, we'll go upstairs and see Buffy, and you can-"

"No!" shouted Dawn, who was now in complete hysterics. "Something's wrong with you, a-and I'm going to find out what."

Dawn stormed out of the house, completely ignoring Xander as she nearly trampled over him on her way out. Undaunted, Xander went into the kitchen, only to be shocked by Willow. Or rather, by what she was wearing. What she *wasn't* wearing also contributed to the shock value factor, too. "W-Willow, is that....?"

"This?" asked the witch, grabbing hold of her impromptu nightshirt. "I found it last night, and wanted to see if it still....fits. What do you think, Xand?"

Xander stammered nervously as his best friend in the world walked over to him, looking very much like someone who considered talking to be a very low priority right now. "I....Well, you seem to fit....In the shirt, which is good, because it's all you have to fit in. Right now." Xander confirmed his assessment by looking Willow over as she closed in on him. Her shirt (Or is it still mine? he thought) was partially unbuttoned, revealing just enough cleavage to make it clear that Willow wasn't wearing a bra. Also, Xander noticed something red near the bottom of his old shirt-and then promptly went into shock when he realized that it *wasn't* her panties. OhGodOhGodOhGodOhGodOhGod was all that raced through his mind as Willow embraced her oldest friend lustily.

"Well," announced Willow slyly, "if you're not sure that I fit in your shirt anymore, I could always give it....back."

"Huh?" asked Xander vacantly as the last bit of blood in his big head rushed straight to his little one. When Willow broke the awkward pause by nibbling playfully on his ear, Xander leapt backward, now as mortified as he was turned on.

"What's wrong, Xander?" whimpered the now dejected witch. "Don't you love me?"

That's the problem, thought Xander as he quickly concocted a lie that had a chance at holding back his unbelievably horny friend. "That's not the pr-problem, Will. I just forgot to buy something on the way here." Willow gave Xander a confused look until he added nervously, "You know....protection?" Like a good de-lusting spell, or an army of Slayers....

"Oh!" replied Willow, acting like herself (at least as far as Xander was concerned) for the first time all day. "You should have said something before getting me all hot-and-bothery."

"Sorry."

"Darn right you are," she scolded half-jokingly. "Now go, and hurry up."

"Or....?" asked Xander, knowing full well that there was an "Or...." that belonged in Willow's last comment.

"Or," said Willow, whispering into Xander's ear seductively, "I might just have to *spank* a certain naughty little boy when he gets back from the store."

"Oh God." Xander gulped loudly as he suddenly became even more aroused than he had been before, if such a thing was actually possible. "O-okay," he murmured before running out of the Summers home in a combination of fear and relief.

***

"Spike?"

Dawn looked around Spike's crypt, searching for some sign of life. Or, in this case, unlife. She called out his name again, only to see someone stand up from Spike's chair. "Wh-who are you?"

"I'm a....friend of Spike's," replied the shark-like demon standing before Dawn. "He owes me something, and I'm waiting here patiently for him to return."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with that 'Kitten Poker' thing would it?" asked the young girl, the lines of worry now evident on her face. "Because I really don't want to be here for any of that. Killing cute animals is *so* not my thing...."

Dawn turned to leave, only to have the exit before her blocked by two very burly vampiric minions. "I'm sorry, but I simply can't allow that to happen," replied the demon flatly as the two vampires closed in on the teenager. "You see, Spike owes me 40 Siamese, and I intend to get them back. Normally, Vinny the Shark doesn't stoop to kidnapping to get what he wants, but you just look too good to pass up."

"Let me get this right," asked Dawn as a small smile emerged on her face, "You're a shark, and your name is Vinny?" When the shark nodded slightly, Dawn exploded into laughter. "A loan shark....named Vinny....I can't believe it...."

"Don't you dare associate me with those....*vermin*!" replied a now annoyed Vinny. "I, miss, am a card shark."

"Oh, you're a *card* shark," said Dawn as she again broke into hysterical laughter. "I'm *so* sorry, Mr. Shark. Please forgive me...."

Vinny was now severely pissed. "Boys," he ordered, "make sure our guest feels comfortable. I want to make sure that she doesn't have any sudden urges to leave before we're done with her. It would be a tragedy if we had to turn her into....bait."

"Bait?" asked Dawn before slipping into fits of laughter yet again. "Oh, please, stop," she begged, now rolling on the crypt floor in complete hysterics. "I think I'm going to pee my pants!"

"....Literally."

"Oh," replied Dawn, her smiled quickly fading from her face. "That's really not necessary. I'm sorry, honest! Just don't hurt me!" Vinny didn't answer; he just looked on coldly as the vampires carried the frightened girl down to the lower portion of Spike's crypt.