Harry's Revenge

Disclaimer:  This is my rather embarrassing attempt to write a parody based on the books by J.K. Rowling.

Summary:  This is a parody of the Harry Potter books.  One night, I was extremely bored, and in the mood to write.  The rest is history.

Chapter 2

The rest of the holidays were a nightmare.  Harry took extra care to distance himself from Hermione, Ron, and the rest of the Weasleys… but try as he might, Ginny seemed to apparrate wherever Harry happened to be, and would taunt him about being a loser, and failing to win Draco over.  It didn't bother Harry so much to be called a loser, but he was starting to get a smidge annoyed because the redhead had decided to disclose every detail of what the couple would do.  Finally, Harry just stuffed cotton balls in his ears so he couldn't hear her.

None too soon, September first arrived.  There was havoc in the Weasley home as four students prepared to go to Hogwarts for the year.  Harry was proving to be hard-headed and rude by making snide comments to his fellows, and tripping the ministry drivers as they made their way between the Weasley house and their cars.

Once the group reached King's Cross Station, Harry hurriedly swept off to the barrier that separated the train station from Platform 9 and 3/4.  He was halfway across the station when he stopped and huffily walked back to the ministry cars.

"How hard is it for you to get me a trolley for my crap?"  Harry demanded of the driver, who just rolled his eyes, and muttered, "Famous brat," under his breath as Harry stormed away.

Suddenly, Harry stopped.  He whirled around, and stared at the driver as he said, "What did you say to me?"

The driver diverted his eyes before saying, "Nothing, Mr. Potter."

Apparently, Harry accepted this answer.  Just as the tension seemed to drain from the air, Harry went ballistic.

"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE??" Harry demanded.  Harry released a string of obscenities as he began emptying the contents of various trunks on the ground.  Amid the chaos, Harry knocked over Hedwig's cage, unleashing the enormous bird into the air.  With an angry squawk, Hedwig took flight.  Strangely, Harry seemed to emit an angry squawk that could be compared to Hedwig's.  "DAMN IT!" Harry screeched.  "You'd better hope that freaking bird makes it's way to the school, or you'll be out of a job!" He screamed at the driver.  Then, he turned on Mrs. Weasley.  "How could you have allowed such an incompetent fool to drive us here?  Don't you even care about me?"

Without waiting for an answer, Harry yet again stormed off towards the train, dragging his trunk and Hedwig's empty cage behind him.  The Weasleys and Hermione were left frozen by the cars, astounded that Harry had allowed such a trivial event to affect him so much that he allowed himself to create a scene in front of Wizards and Muggles alike.  Finally, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Mrs. and Mr. Weasley were able to gather their belongings and follow Harry towards the train.

Harry threw his belongings into a compartment, and glared at Ron and Hermione as they cautiously walked into the compartment.

"Listen, mate," Ron said warily, "We're going to stay in this compartment with you--everywhere else is full."

Harry grudgingly conceded.  "Whatever.  Just leave me alone," Harry spat before turning to stare out the window at the passing countryside.

The train ride was going smoothly, thanks to the effort exerted by Ron and Hermione, who were quietly reading, or else talking in most hushed voices and glancing nervously at Harry. 

Eventually, the inevitable occurred.  Draco and his lackeys burst into Harry's compartment.  However, for once, this was, seemingly, a complete accident.  As soon as he opened the door, Draco and Harry's eyes locked.  Draco's expression was a mixture of longing and loathing, while Harry looked like he would jump off the ends of the earth just to be with Draco.  Quickly, Draco regained his sense of self, and began acting obnoxiously, as was expected of him.

"Hello Potty, Weasel, and Bushy," Draco said to Harry, Ron, and Hermione.  Hermione glanced at Harry, and could see the hurt expression on his face.  She then looked at Ron, and was surprised to see that he looked even more malicious than usual.

"Beat it, Malfoy," Ron said through clenched teeth.  Harry looked as though he was torn by different emotions.  Obviously, he didn't wish to be insulted by the man he loved, but, heck, he didn't want to see him go, either.

Malfoy turned to Harry, and his lips curled into a sneer, "Do you want me to leave, Potty?"

Harry winced, as though he had just received a blow.  Then, he stared at Malfoy defiantly, and held his chin high as he quietly said, "Get lost, Malfoy.  No body wants you here."

Now it was Malfoy's turn to look hurt.  However, he quickly rebounded, and walked out of the compartment, followed closely by Crabbe and Goyle.

As if trying desperately to act normally, Harry spent the rest of the trip participating in the conversation.  For the first time in two weeks, Harry, Ron, and Hermione felt like they were best friends again.  However, Harry's almost jovial spirit ended abruptly as the trains neared Hogwarts.  Evidently, Harry was reminded that he would have to see Malfoy everyday, and this thought seemed to put him in a sour mood again.  Finally, Ron and Hermione gave up trying to initiate conversation, and took to staring out the window.

For the first few weeks of school, Harry remained in a surly mood--only speaking when absolutely necessary, and trying his best to ignore the ridicule he received from students in the school who had heard about his fleeting romance with Draco.  To Harry's dismay, Ginny seemed absolutely gleeful when she taunted Harry.  "This just won't do," Harry said softly at Halloween, when a carved likeness of Draco appeared at Harry's seat in the Great Hall, courtesy of Ginny.  Harry glared at Ginny, who was seated just four spaces down, smiling in a self-satisfied manner.

"What was that, Harry?" Ron asked nervously, glancing quickly at the jack-o-lantern, and then at Harry's murderous gaze.

"Oh… nothing," Harry said, catching himself mid-glare.  Smiling, he elaborated, "I just prefer pumpkin pie, that's all."

Ron nodded, though he still looked unconvinced.  Harry thought, it looks like Ron is being poisoned by that Ginny too… I'll have to be more careful around him.  And Hermione.  She's too smart for her own good, AND easily suspicious…

Early in the morning on the day after Halloween, Draco could be found gazing lazily out over the Hogwarts grounds.  Nervous about the upcoming Quidditch match, Draco had awaken before dawn, but, unable to go to sleep, he had decided to sit on the stairs leading to the main doors of the school to wait for breakfast to be served.  As he scanned the landscape, movement caught his eye.  Curious, Draco decided to get a closer look.  Clinging to the shadows, Draco advanced on the cloaked figure.  Quietly, Draco crept within twenty feet of the figure, and listened as he muttered something under his breath.  Draco was unable to make out the words, but could see another figure emerge from the shadows of the Forbidden Forest.  Draco was so surprised, that he nearly let out a cry of surprise.  Feeling he shouldn't witness this meeting, Draco rushed as quickly and quietly as possible back to the castle.