A/N: Well, it's another fine, freezing cold day here in cow town (ironic. I hate cows and yet I live in Calgary). Well, whatever. Guess what? I won a writing contest for my story! I'm so happy, especially because my creative writing teacher told me the voice I used in the story was immature and non-serious. Duh.
B-CAT! I HAVE A MESSAGE!
This little contest is very fun! Hahaha. I still really love your story, though. You're pretty crazy and bizarre. Perhaps I'm your long-lost sister? Hmmm…
Anywho, lets carry on with this wonderful story of mine
-Jillian The Bold (a.k.a. Grassmonkey)
Ya Want Fries With That?
"I'm aware that girls are messed up. However, I am not wrong. You must become sexy."
"Define sexy," Gohan inquired.
"Uh, Gohan? This is ME we're talking to- remember? I'm just the nimble little Vegeta who was only sexy for a week. Go ask Roshi."
"Roshi?"
Vegeta nodded. Obviously, his intelligent streak was ending. "Yup! I think he's seen all those James John movies or something."
"I think you mean Bond. James Bond."
"Whatever. I mean that he'll know all about being suave. Hopefully."
But before Gohan could reply, Twink approached the duo of Saiyans. "Mr. Janitor! I thought I told you to WORK! Honestly, you should try to act more like Erato."
"Sorry. I don't do Shakespeare."
"Very funny. Now, my darling little daughter knocked over a drink. Clean it."
Gohan smiled! Yes! I'll get to talk to Videl, finally! He grabbed his trusty mop and frolicked over to where Wink had drowned a friendly old man (you know, the kind with really red noses and cheeks?) in orange soda. Hopping over the counter, Gohan approached Videl. "Hi! How's it going?"
"Well, you don't look like a bee anymore."
"No?"
"Banana."
"Damn."
Videl laughed. God he's cute. Err, I mean suspicious. "So how's life in the scrubbing department?"
"Well, we prefer to be called Cleanliness Engineers, but it's great. Lonely without my trusty headset though."
"Yeah. It sounds fun. All I can do is think of you when life gets shitty. But I swear, if I have to deal with one more frantic mom, I'll kill myself."
"CUSTODIAN! GET YOUR BUTT TO WORK!"
The Saiyan rolled his eyes. "Does this guy know anyone's name?"
"He knows mine!!!" Wink piped enthusiastically.
"Top call," Videl groaned. Her headaches were getting worse every day. Meanwhile, Gohan rubbed his ears as he began to mop up all the soda Wink had spilled.
As this went on, an elderly old lady approached the counter (what is it with these old people? They're ALWAYS in fast food joints!), using a cane to maneuver herself across the neon green tiles. The object of Gohan's affections noticed this and turned around. "Welcome. Order?" Wink gasped. She still wasn't used to Videl's destruction of the greeting.
"Do you folks still carry those wheat grass soups?"
"Ugh. Sure. Hold on." Videl pressed the order into the cash register, which transferred over to some poor sap in the kitchen. Suddenly, since the fowl odor of dead birds on the lady was rather distasteful, Videl sneezed.
The old bird went into action! She whipped a Kleenex out of her sleeve, done over the counter, flipped the lid of her cane, which exposed some crap cough tonic and shoved it down the youngest Satan's throat before she could even blink.
Videl wasn't prepared for this. Spluttering, due to the horrid taste, which reminded her of her father's socks, she threw the old lady off of her. Right in front of her boss. Which was not a good thing to do. "CHICK WITH BLACK HAIR! HOW DARE YOU?" Twink demanded, while running over to pick the super-grandma off the floor. "I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR BAD ATTITUDE! TRADE JOBS WITH THE MOP-BOY!"
"Sweet!" Gohan yelled.
"Aw, hell."
~
Later on, Gohan was happily plucking away at the keys of the register. This new assignment beat the other two by a long shot. Nobody yelling into the mike and no ruining his soft, supple hands with the cleaning chemicals, which should never be used without gloves when they're corrosive. Yup. Life was grand. And the funniest part was seeing Videl in his old janitor jumpsuit. Since there was only one suit, she was stuck wearing Gohan's old one. And he's like a foot taller than her. Fortunately, Erato had a poetry reading to attend, so he had left work early. The only dark side was Wink, who seemed to be attracted to Gohan. Very badly.
"So, like, how'd you get such a great butt? Do you like, work out?"
Videl's ears perked up at this, as she swept the floor nearby. "Yeah. I'm into martial arts."
Ah hah! Martial arts! So is Saiyaman! Progress! I just know he's Saiyaman! They've got the same sexy long legs… Drool. However, while Videl was mentally ogling Gohan, a disaster lurked nearby…
"Videl! What are you doing? This is servant's work!" Hercule screeched, drawing the attention of the entire facility.
"Hark!" Twink cried. "It's our savior!!!"
End Chapter
I know it's a wee bit short, but I've got tons of homework. Please review, I've had the hiccup's all day and I'm sure reviews will help.
Speaking of reviews, I have a little contest going. Whoever can spot the most puns in this story will get a special little prize in their inbox (no, it's not a virus). So look through and list as many puns as you can find. Odds are, I probably didn't notice them myself! It's a great way to kill time and put off doing your homework.
