SPIKE

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Disclaimer: I don't own/know any of these characters/cast members. You do the math. J

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She sat down in the kitchen, drinking up a mug of coffee. Dawn was upstairs sleeping…soundly, safely.

But she knew Dawn was never safe. Nobody was ever safe. Times were different now. Hell Gods and vampires, they were all over the place, waiting for a good chance to shred the Key…to shred anyone…to bits.

Vampires.

Yeah, they were really all over the place. All the vampires except one, of course. Spike. Yeah, he was still gone.

She looked out the window, emptiness clawing at her stomach and climbing up her throat, hollowing her out till she was barely alive…till her soul was just barely hanging on.

It was as if, when Spike went…everything she knew went too.

Everything.

She pulled on Spike's black leather jacket, the one he'd forgotten when he ran out of the house that night. That fateful night weeks before.

She felt the soft leather interior rub against her skin. She let the familiar smell of Spike drown her in memories she never thought were important before.

She closed her eyes, tears forming behind her heavy eyelids. A vision flashed before her. Blue eyes, bleached hair, dark clothes, strong arms, warmth…Spike.

She opened her eyes, unshed tears trickling silently down her cheeks.

She blinked, another memory pulling her in. She didn't run away, instead she embraced it…the way a father would embrace a long lost child. She embraced it and listened to the familiar voice echoing in her head.

"I know you never loved me but I know I'm a monster…and you treat me like a man…"

Did she ever love him? She did. She knew it. When he hurt her…was she mad at him? Or was that just instinct? She wasn't mad…she was hurt…in pain…but not angered. No. She loved him.

When she was brought to life again…she told him…and she meant it. She loved Spike.

"Spike, where are you?" she whispered. She needed him.

She looked out the window. "Spike, I love you."