The Weakest Link
AUTHORS NOTES: Damn. Duo's done it again, he's made the stupidest Parody ever, and is blackmailing me to put it on. * eyes get shifty * Did I say Blackmail? I meant, er, um, Party!! That made no sense. Sorry. I am shamed. Whatever. Anywho, This is a huge parody based on the T.V. show "The Weakest Link." Because the basketball game (see my story "Weiss Ball") failed, Weiss & Swartz needed to find a reasonable way to settle their hostile conflict. So they consulted Manx, who everyone knows is the most reasonable of these characters, and She came up with a "rousing" game of "Weakest Link". So much for resonablitly. Yoji liked the sound of that, sorry to say, and voted her to be the host of the show, with which everyone agreed. Therefore, Manx's joke backfired, to witch is hilarious to the likes of me. (Duo: What'd ya say? BatmanYojiLover: Nothing of interest to you, you big fat monkey!!! Duo: Mo-Monkey? * bursts into tears * ) * sigh * just read!!(vy the way, I do not own any of these chara's (except Yoshini Micatoshi) so please do not sue me.)By the way again, Keith is a real life chara. ^.^ And he is really like this.
Manx: * standing in center podium, wearing a cleavage showing black suit. * Hello America, welcome to this nights edition of, "Weakest Link." *sigh* Let's get this over with. In these podiums, there are eight young men who have some sort of grudge against another, and tonight, they are going to face off in another contest, hopefully with a winner. All right, here we go. Standing in the first podium is Mr. Aya, who is with us here as the team leader of the Weiss. I hope you know you are all against each other in this game, Aya, and cheating won't be tolorated. * Looks over at the five judges * Hopefully. Anyway, Aya enjoys glaring, glaring, scoffing, and glaring. Anything to say to the viewers, Aya?
Aya: * glaring at camera and audience * Takatori will die.
Manx: * cough * Okay.... erm, next up is Swartz member Nagi. Nagi enjoys picking things up with his mind, being a brat, annoying the hell out of Brad, and making out with Omi. * raises eyebrows at Nagi, who shuffles around nervously. *
Nagi: I thought our likes we confidential.....
Manx: * glares * This is National Television, Nagi, nothing is confidential.
Aya: Stop glaring!! That's my thing!!!
Manx: * stops glaring * Okay, this is strange already. Next constant is Yoji, * gets wide eyed * Yoji? Crapness.
Yoji: Waz a madda, Manx? I thought you enjoyed my company!
Manx: God.... Erm, he likes skinny dipping, ugh, frenching girls, double ugh, and making out with Manx. * does a double take. * what??
Yoji: * "Shooms" over to Manx and puts his arms around her, smiling into the camera * Yes, my love, It is no longer a secret. Manx and I are dating, we have made out several times, and we did it-
Manx: Okay buster that's it!! * thwaps Yoji on the head with a frying pan, wherever that came from, and throws his K.O. ed body across his podium. shakes head and continues. All right, next is Farfie of the Swartz team, who enjoys licking knives, punishing God with knives, killing people with knives, and trying to stab Aya with Knives. I think we get the point, the guy likes knives.
Farfie: * looks up from knife * Point? Knife? Where?
Aya: * Sarcastically * In your hand, you idiot. Next !!
Manx: * clears throat * Okay, next is Weiss member Omi!! He enjoys going to chat rooms, making websites, going to Net Cafe's, and typing stuff on his pocket PC. Omi? Something to say? Omi?
* Omi is sleeping on his podium, Shu-Shu standing next to his with a empty syrenge in his hand.*
Shu-Shu: Omi is unable to play, and has voted me to take his place. * smiles sweetly *
Manx: * shrugs * this isn't my problem. Judges, should Shu-Shu be allowed to take Omi's place?
* Judges type in answers on Pocket PC's instant massaging their votes to Manx's podium computer *
Manx: Okay the votes are in. Two say yes, two vote no.
Shu-Shu: What??? who voted no??? Arn't there five judges??
Manx: yeah, there is. Okay, Persia voted yes * Persia nods * Yoshini voted yes * gives thumbs up and peace sign * , Oka voted no * crying for Omi *, Yuuki voted no * trying to creep away * and Keith...whoever he is.... voted " screw you." * Keith nods, smiling *
Shu-Shu: Yuuki!! You voted no????
Yuuki: * seeing he's been caught * umm, no!! No!! that computer must have it wrong!!! * smiles at furious Shu-Shu *
Manx: Are you changing your vote?
Yuuki: um, er, um..... * glances between Manx and Shu-Shu, Shu-Shu glaring daggers *
Shu-Shu: * turns away * okay fine. No more Sex.
Yuuki: * quickly types in change of vote *
Manx: Alright, Shu-shu, take your spot.
* Shu-Shu takes spot quickly, Yuuki wiping his brow*
Keith: O.o? Why the hell am I here??
Manx: * seems not to hear BatmanYojiLovers's brother's complants, and turns away, introducing next chara.* Okay, next is Swartz's Brad- BRAD!!!!
* screams at Brad, who is makeing out with Shuldig and unzipping his pants *
Brad: * pulls away* this better be good.....
Manx: ahem.... Brad likes waering suits, being evil, doing bussiness on the stock market, being evil, glareing at people, being evil and.....
Keith: I might like this guy...
Manx: and Making out with Shuldig.
Keith: NOOOOOOOOO!! MY INNER EAR!!!!
Brad: * rolling eyes * yes. * pointing to Shuldig and talking really fast. * and this is Shuldig. He like being a copycat and making out with me. Good bye!!! * resumes "Being" with Shuldig.*
Manx: *looks away* ugg. that almsot as bad as Yoji being awake.
Yoji: *Wakes up and sees Brad and Shuldig* Get a room, you two.
Manx: Damn. Anyway, let's see if we can introduce Ken properly.
Ken: I like Soccer, soccer, teching kids to play soccer, and soccer.
Manx: Good!! Anything you want to say?
Ken: O.o? Erm, the answer is Puilsbury Doughboy(tm)!!!
Manx: *sigh* It's the basketball game all over again. All we need is Takatori.
Aya: Takatori!!Where?????
Manx: Not here!! not here! *sighs* Okay, the first question. Let's play, "Weakest Link"!!!!
*lights flash and focus on Aya, the first player.*
Aya: Shi- ne?
Manx: Okay, Aya, What is the tallest bulding in the world?
Aya: Erm, Takatori's head on my katana?
Manx: no. Nagi: What is the seventh wonder of the world?
Nagi: Omi?
Manx: *sigh. sacasticly* Let's find out!!! Judges???
*Judges type on pocket PC's, sending them one by one to Manx's podum computer.*
Manx: Okay, Four say no, and one says "Bischoff is a homo"
Yoshini: Homo? *Ken runs up and covers his ears and glares at Keith, who obviously was the one who wrote it.*
Yoji: I understand the homo part * recives glare from Ken* but who the hell is Bischoff??
* They all stare at Keith for a moment, who just grins and nodds.*
Manx: Whatever. No Nagi, Omi is not a wonder of the world.
Nagi: Dang.
Manx: *turns to Yoji* Okay Yoji. Who was placed on the cover of the 1998 issue of Playgirl?
Yoji: Easy!! Me!!
Manx: * wide eyed * wow, your right!!
Yoji:Bank!!!
*yoji gains the team 200$*
Manx: next. Farfie: What is the most recent big time theater company opened in California.
Farfie: *licks a kinfe and cuts his tougne.* Ha!! Take that God!!!!
Manx:okay, no, that is not the answer. Omi- er, I mean- Shu-Shu? What is the best known Internet sever on the Information super highway today?
Omi: * waking up* ugg... It's- * shu-shu knocks his head in with frying pan used on Yoji*
Shu-Shu: YUUKI!!!!!
Yuuki: What?
Manx: Yuuki is not the answer. sorry.
Shu-Shu: aaaawwwwww!!!!! * gives Manx puppy face *
Manx: no. Brad? ewww!!!
* Brad and Shuldig were intensly, uh, buesy on the stage floor. Ken quickly covers Yoshini's eyes.*
Manx: * skiping the two loverbirds *Ken! who is the basketball player that has scored the most baskets in year 2002??
Ken: erm, Who is Shaq?
Manx: *Applueds * you are correct!!!
Ken: Thanks Yoshini!!!
Manx: What?
Ken and Yoshini together: Nothing!!!!
* Ken gains team another 200$ *
Manx: Back to Aya. Aya: Who is the author of the "Zanith" series books?
Aya: I will rip out Takatori's lungs.
* Cricket chrip *
Manx: Uh, no. Alright, Nagi, who is the main actor in the T.V. show, "Alley Mc Beal"?
Nagi: oh, that's easy, It's Sarah Michelle Gallar. * gets shifty eyes. * And Omi.
Manx: Sarah Michelle is corect, Omi is not, you do not get any points. Yoji:Who was on the cover of Playboy magazine in the fall of 2000?
Yoji: Me!
Manx: Unfortunately, your right. Damn you, muse!! * shakes fist at Duo, who's sitting in the audiance BatmanYojiLover *
Duo: Not my fault, that bit of info was sent in by Batman herself!
BatmanYojiLover: Heh heh.... not that I read it or anything... * gets shifty eyes * I only scan it for the articles!
Shuldig: * pauses makeing out with Brad * Sure, that's what I said, but did anyone belive me? NNNNNNNOOOOO!!!! People judge me from my reputation. It's not fair. I just bought that issue for Yoji's pic!
Brad: What? And you didn't even look at any of the pictures that I gave you!
Shuldig: You weren't nude.
Brad: I was Too!!!
Nagi: OH MY VIRGIN EARS!!!
Keith: That is even more desguting than Blue pegiuns thursday Checkslovakia.
Yoji: YOU DONT MAKE ANY SENSE!!! WHO THE HELL ARE YOU ANYWAY!!!!
Keith: I am the supreme Czar of the world. The people of this earth will someday bow to me and kiss my feet.
Yoji: I'll kiss Manx's feet.
Manx: SHUT. UP!!!
Ken: Are we even playing this game anymore?
Manx: SHUT. UP!!!!
Aya: * spots someone is the audiance who looks nothing like Takatori, but has the same hair color * TAKATORI!!!!! SHI~NE!!!!!! * hacks up poedum, sparks fly everywhere and catches other stuff on fire *
Manx: * crying * you guys..... I tought this was supposed to be subtle.... oh god....help........ someone....
Farfie: GOD CAN'T SAVE YOU NOW!!! BURN IN HELL, GOD!!!!!
* runs off somewhere to make sure God burns *
Manx: Why can't I just have a normal life?
Nagi: * grabs Omi before Oka, who as in the judges seats, can reach him, and runs off.*
Oka: * chases them off stage*
Persia: * pats Manx on the back and escorts her off the stage *
Aya: * Chases audiance out of the staduim, yelling * WHERE ARE YOU TAKATORI!!! I WILL CUT YOUR HEART OUT WITH A SPOON AND FEED IT TO YOU!!!!
BatmanYojiLover: * thwaps Keith * Looks what you did too all the Chara's!
How could you!?!?!?!?!
Keith: * shruggs * Hey, wanna go play Wrestlemainia X8?
BatmanYojiLover: Duo?
Duo: * already holding controller * I call Kane!!
* Keith, Batman and Duo stalk off somewhere to play Nintendo *
Yoji: * grabs a nineteen year old girl from audiance* You know, I was on the cover of Playgirl and Playboy. * runs off *
Ken: Hey Yoshini.....
Yoshini: Hey Ken.....
Ken: You wanna..... um... you know....
Yoshini: Play basketball? Sure! * runs off with Ken *
Shu-Shu: I'm dissipointed in you, Yuuki.
Yuuki: Me? I don't care. Sex. Now. * runs off with Shu *
* Weakest Link stadium burns to the ground, witch was actually my purpose for this whole stupid skeatch *
~End STUPID sketch ~
