Spike reached the Hellmouth safely, but who can really be safe at a place like Sunnydale?  He walked around a bit, feeling the pull of his conscience on his mind once more.  Quickly, he bought a newspaper and ran off to read it and cry in silence.  brbr

The only problem was, he couldn't find a good resting spot.  There were people everywhere.  That's when he spotted it, the new High School.  brbr

            He remembered when he first had been in the old one.  Crashing Buffy's attempt at being a normal student had been so pleasing.  The soul just reminded him of the pain he had caused her and he almost buckled.  He rushed to find solitude. brbr

            Reluctantly, he made up his mind and ran to the High School.  He sneaked in the back way and found a piece not fully constructed yet, which led to the basement.  He hid amongst the rubble found there, and leaned against the wall. brbr

            His own wall of strength he had made against his soul was let down, and he slid down the wall as he burst into tears.  He had waited too long.  The nothingness was back, and loneliness came with it.  But this time, the loneliness was too strong.  Not only was he reminded of how lonely he was, he was also reminded of why he would NEVER be loved and that he didn't deserve it.  brbr

            The taunting was normal, but this taunting lasted for hours.  Then days.  It wouldn't leave him alone, give him any rest.  He dug at his heart, wishing that he could just gouge it out and die, but he knew it wouldn't work anyway, despite the pain it would cause him. brbr

            The feelings he felt flooded over him, until his eyes glazed over and he collapsed onto the ground, not waking for a few days.  By the time he had awoken, his soul had ransacked his mind, and he was left to fend for himself, trying to make himself sane again. brbr

            What little he could say on his own, before going back into craziness, was enough to tell himself he'd be ok.  brbr

            When Buffy found him the next day, it took everything he had to stop the lunacy in his mind long enough to say hello and to warn her of an attacker behind her.  Then he fell back onto the floor and rocked back and forth, spewing nothing but riddles from his long-lost mind.  brbrhr

            Willow arrived in Sunnydale, feeling lost and confused.  The second she stepped out of the car, Giles rushed to her side, ready to catch her.  It was a good thing he was there, too, because when she stepped out, the memories and the pain flew back to her, as if she were living through it all over again.  It was too much to handle, and she fell backwards. brbr

            Giles caught her in mid-fall, but he couldn't save her from what was there.  He picked her up and carried her to his apartment, which he owned in case of emergencies.  He laid her down on the couch and put a blanket over her.  brbr

            "Giles, why am I here again?" she croaked.  He sighed, "I know it hurts, but you must face what is to come, Willow.  What happened was unfortunate, but you'll never get over it unless you face the truth.  This is why we're here.  I'm going to call Buffy and inform her of our return.  Please, just relax."  He rose and went upstairs to phone Buffy. brbr

            Willow cringed inside, and wished for everything to just, disappear for a while.  Just long enough for her to find herself again.  She wasn't the same as she was back when she met Buffy.  She had changed, and she wasn't too sure that she missed her old self.  But one thing was certain, she missed the care-free life.  She silently rolled over, pulled the blanket up close, and fell asleep. brbr

            Giles came downstairs, about to tell Willow to rest, but it was obvious that she didn't need to be told.  He smiled to himself, glad she had found some peace, if only for a short while.  The next few days would be extremely hard on the poor girl.hr