Disclaimers: I own… nothing, for the 9th time (except OCs…)
A/N: I'll increase the rating for this chapter, because it contains unpleasant details about murder and rapture, so please, if you are sensitive to that, think before reading…
I was in a bad, not to say quite depressed mood when I wrote that, it was in the night when my father spent the last night in our flat before moving out, well… only as a small explanation…
Thanks to Moongirl for her wonderful support!
Chapter 9
*~*~*~*
The first weeks back at school were pretty uneventful, after short time the other students got used to the fact that Sirius and Remus were together. Sometimes there were some jealous girls making dumb comments, and some Slytherin's said things like faggots, queer, queens and so on wherever they were seen, but that was easy to overhear for the two lovers, who were busier with themselves.
On one cold day in November, it suddenly knocked on the door in Transfiguration class, and a house-elf stood there. "Mr. Lupin please is go seeing the headmaster, he is wanting to talk to you, Mister." Remus was a little confused, he didn't remember, that he had done anything wrong or anything. Maybe something had had happened.
"Can I go, Professor?" he asked Prof. McGonagall.
"Sure. Please come back when you are ready."
"What have you done, Moony?" Sirius whispered urgently.
"Nothing! I have no idea!"
"Please go, Mr. Lupin."
The house-elf took Remus to the office (it wasn't that he didn't knew, where it was…), Dumbledore looked sad and upset at the boy in front of him.
"Good morning, Remus. Come here and sit down with me. Thank you, Libby, you can go back to the kitchen now."
"Yes master."
Dumbledore guided Remus to a comfortable-looking armchair and sat down in front of him. He sighed and then he started to speak.
"Remus, something very serious had happened. I'm going to tell you how it was, without lies, without glossing over, because it won't make it easier for you." Remus was quite worried now. Was he going to be expelled? Had they found out about his lycanthropy? Must he go because of that?
"Your mother is… dead. Your father has raped her and after that he killed her. I'm really sorry I have to tell you that." Remus went very pale at once. It was a thing he had feared for long time. His father would kill anybody. But his…mother? Why? It wasn't possible! He covered his face with his hands and rested his elbows on his knees. He wanted to scream, to say so much, but he could not say a word. He almost couldn't breathe, it felt like tons of stones and sand had fallen on him and buried him deep under them. The room around him suddenly was spinning around, his ears felt like they had been blocked. After a long time an almost inaudible "Why?" escaped from his mouth. "I don't know it, Remus, nobody can tell you that except your father." Dumbledore said tranquilly.
"I… I… my father, he… he is a monster! He had done it to me too! Every night! Beaten me with his belt, he… he… he fucked me till I was bleeding! Now he took my mother after I wasn't there anymore. He had done it to her before too. Maybe one time she dared to tell him to stop, or maybe she tried to run away. Like I did. But he didn't catch me. Maybe he caught her, and then he… he had to punish her! Tell me, Professor, how did he kill her? Tell me!" Remus had completely lost control over himself; everything that was bottled up inside his mind suddenly came out. He forgot that he was talking to his headmaster, to one of the persons he had most respect of in this world, and he had just screamed at him. But Dumbledore wasn't mad at him at all. He was only looking startled and sadder than before, and also he turned pale. He had prepared for an emotional reaction, but he hadn't been prepared for this kind of revelations. He was aware of the fact that his student was in a very serious and alarming condition. Maybe he should talk to his friends, maybe they could help him. But should he really tell him, what has happened at the Lupin's house? John Lupin had come home quite drunk, and after raping his wife, he suddenly lost the little bit of control that was in his body. He has taken a knife and dismembered her completely. After doing that he was found there like that, sitting in between the blood and all the parts of her body. Some muggle policemen found there like that, after somebody alarmed them. Dumbledore still wasn't sure if he could expect from the skinny boy in front of him, who was looking at him with so much pain in his eyes, but also a lot of anger and hatred could be found there, to bear these thoughts and pictures. Then a hoarse voice tore apart his thoughts.
"Please, professor, tell me what happened, I need to know it!" the boy pleaded.
After a deep sigh the old man answered. "He cut her into pieces. He was found sitting in middle of a mess of blood and intestines by some Muggle Policemen. He is in prison now. In a Muggle prison."
"Oh my god…" That was all Remus managed to say. Then his vision blurred, and he stood up. "Professor, I… I need some air, please, can I go?"
"Yes, sure. But… Promise me, don't do any stupidities, yes? And you don't have to go to your morning classes now; I'll send something to the teachers. But in the afternoon you'll go please."
"Yes, professor…"
With these words he rushed out of the office and ran out of the castle as fast and as long as he could, but already after short time he broke down at the side of the lake. He was kneeling on the grass and a scream broke out of him. He screamed until there was no voice left, and he wanted to cry, he wanted to feel the Sirius' strong arms around him. He wanted to feel safe again in his arms, to cry there as long as he needed, but he was alone. Nobody was there. Nobody. You're alone here, Remus, absolutely alone. Nobody will help you now. Remus felt, that he wasn't able to breathe anymore, but he was almost pleased by the thought, that he could die here and now. He didn't know, that it still would get worse. Almost unconscious as he was he didn't hear the footsteps of somebody coming nearer, but then he heard a cold voice behind him.
"Oh, if that's not a part of our sweet queer couple?" Remus looked behind him and saw Lucius Malfoy standing there. His eyes were cold and his voice full of sarcasm. "I heard somebody scream, and I thought that they're being tortured, and I also wanted to be part of this fun. But as I see, you're not tortured at all, but I could do something against that…" he said menacingly. Remus' thoughts were spinning around in his head, he was really afraid. Malfoy was quite big, and in a fight he wouldn't have almost any chance, as he was still weary because of the last moon, which was only two days ago. Suddenly Malfoy took his arm and pulled him up. Then he dragged him to a few bushes near them and began to take off Remus' robes.
"No, please…" he begged in a low voice.
"Oh yes." Malfoy answered and pressed his lips against Remus' ones, and he took of his pants, leaving the boy in front of him completely naked. The young werewolf was
Shivering because of the shame and the cold, but also because of the fear. He didn't dare to move at all. With anxious eyes he followed every movement of the other boy, who was slowly taking off his clothes. And Remus suddenly knew exactly what would follow. This thought took away his breath again, he felt as he would collapse this very moment, everything in front of his eyes was turning black and he had the sensation of standing on waves. He closed his eyes and felt a hand on his hips. He felt that he was turned around and forced to the ground, felt hands moving over his body, touching also his private parts, and after little time he felt Malfoy pushing hard into him. It was like being at home again, like being abused by his father again. He had never slept with Sirius. He still didn't want to do it, because it reminded him of… too many hurting thoughts. He told his boyfriend, that he still wasn't ready to do it and Sirius simply accepted it. It was like Sirius could understand everything, but he had never been able to talk to him about his father. But even if they hadn't talked about it, it was like Sirius knew it. Maybe he really knew it. Remus suddenly was aware of what was happening to him, he realized that he was begging the bigger boy to stop, he felt tears rolling down his face, but nothing would help, "Shut up now, or do you want me to hurt you really?" was the only thing he became as an answer. Suddenly it was too much for him, and he grew faint.
*****
"But where is he James? He hadn't been at lunch, and he also didn't turn up for the afternoon classes! Something must have happened to him!" Sirius was almost shouting at his best friend, not in anger but terribly worried. He had no idea, where his love had gone after going out from the Transfiguration class. He could be… everywhere. Something could have happened to him maybe he was hurt!
"Sirius!"
"What?"
"The map! Look at the Marauder's map!" James suddenly called. Why hadn't they thought of that before? Sometimes they really couldn't see the wood for the trees. They both rushed up to the dorm and consulted the map. The small dot labeled "Moony" was beneath the lake, and without any other word Sirius ran out of the castle looking at the map, if he was going to in the right direction. When he finally found Moony he was shocked: The young werewolf was lying naked on the ground between some bushes, and obviously unconscious. Padfoot knelt down beneath him and shook his shoulder slightly, but the boy didn't react. Scared Sirius looked for the pulse, and he was a little bit relieved when he found it. But the condition of his boyfriend was alarming anyway. And what the hell happened, that he was lying unconscious and naked on the ground on such a cold day? It was definitely bad. Very bad. But the next thing he had to worry is to get Remus back in the castle and to get him warm again. As he moved the skinny boy to put him on his robes, this one woke up, muttered something sounding like 'Padfoot', but then he passed out again. After Sirius managed to dress Remus halfway, he lifted him up, one arm under his knees, the other one around his back, leaning the head on his shoulder, so it wouldn't drop backwards. Like that he carried him up to the castle to the hospital wing.
