All right! Here is my first posted work at fanfiction.net! And it is my
pride and joy! (We had a Shakespeare Festival in English, and this creation
somehow spawned itself from my research, compilations, tweaking, and
imagination.) I pity all of you who cannot see the video of me (I was
Sycorax) killing Macbeth, or the subdued, quiet Anorexic Chibi transforming
into Orlando to kill Valeria, who we somehow outside of this script
characterized into a brazen, lustful, virgin hussy. (We decided her dying
lines meant she did not want to die a virgin.) HOWEVER take your own ideas
and thoughts from this and please please please tell me what you think!
DISCLAIMER: All lines and characters come from the deceased William Shakespeare, playwright and poet extraordinnaire. Names have been switched around - a line that comes from Hamlet may be directed at Macbeth, for example.
The Revenge of Valeria: A Tragedy
[Valeria, Macbeth enter from opposite sides, awestruck by each other] Valeria: What is't? A spirit? I might call him a thing divine; for nothing natural I ever saw so noble
MacBeth: O you wonder! Be you maid or no?
Valeria: No wonder, sir, but certainly a maid. By my modesty, I would not wish any companion in the world but you.
MacBeth: Hear my soul speak! The very instant that I saw you, did my heart fly to your service.
Valeria: Do you love me? [runs up to Macbeth]
MacBeth: I, beyond all limit of what else I' the world, do love, prize, honor you.
Valeria: I am your wife, if you will marry me.
MacBeth: My mistress, dearest, and I thus humble ever.
Valeria: My husband then?
Macbeth: You are my true and honorable wife. [embrace]
Valeria: (hesitantly) My lord, tell me the reason why thou wilt marry.
MacBeth: (dramatic) My poor body, madam, requires it; I am driven on by the flesh, and he must needs go that the devil drives.
Valeria: (mischievous) Do you think I meant country matters? [drive by, Valeria hit]
Valeria: (painfully) Ah! I am dying, MacBeth, dying. Convey me to my bed, then to my grave. The rest is silence. [dead]
MacBeth: Ah, my sweet Valeria. Woe to the hand that shed this costly blood! [taking Valeria offstage]
Orlando: I have done the deed, Sycorax. [gloating]
Sycorax: But soft, Orlando, behold! [berating]
Tybalt: (warningly) Talkers are no good doers. Orlando: If it were done, when 'tis done, then 'twere well it were done quickly. [Sycorax grabs Orlando's sleeve, exposing arm] Sycorax: Show me one scar characterized on thy skin. Men's flesh preserved so whole do seldom win. [accusing]
Orlando: (pulls arm away) No!- I defy all counsel. [Macbeth finishes leaving with body, leaves travel bags] [Sycorax approaches bad, takes out "sugar", pours in wine bottles]
Sycorax: Oh true apothecary, I pray thy drugs are quick.
Tybalt: (scorn)There's no more valor in that deed than in a wild duck.
Orlando: Here's Tybalt: an honest enough fellow. but he has not so much brains as ear wax.
Sycorax: Comes, let's make haste: he'll soon be back again. [turn to leave, Macbeth and Titania enter]
Macbeth: (grieving)One woe doth tread upon another's heel, so fast they follow. Your sister's dead, Titania.
Titania: (angry, desperate grief) Oh God, that I were a man! I would eat his heart in the marketplace! [Tybalt rushes Titania, scuffle, he loses]
Tybalt: [approaches, wild eyes] Kill Orlando! O happy dagger! This is the sheath!
Sycorax: (harsh) Treachery!
Titania: (gasps) THOU! The devil damn thee black, thou cream-faced loon!
Sycorax: (angry) Thy father slew my father; therefore die! [Titania and Sycorax fight, bo-staff] [Orlando tries to sneak off]
Macbeth: Turn, hell-hound, turn!
Orlando: Of all men else I have avoided thee. But get thee back: my soul is too much charged with blood of thine already.
Macbeth: I have no words; my voice is in my sword, thou bloodier villain than terms can give thee out! [Titania and Sycorax stop fighting to watch Orlando and Macbeth fight] [Sycorax runs away] [Macbeth wins, stealing Orlando's gun and killing him with it]
Macbeth: Valeria, thou art revenged, even with the sword that killed thee!
Titania: (quizzically) They laugh that win.
Macbeth: Thou doth not think how ill all's here about my heart; but it is no matter.
Titania: This is the poison of deep grief. [Macbeth pauses, grabs wine, lifts to mouth, pauses at Titania's reproving glance]
Titania: Macbeth!
Macbeth: Doth it show vilely on me to desire small beer?
Titania: (shakes head)Good night, Macbeth, good night. [Titania leaves]
[Macbeth drinks wine, chokes, falls] [Sycorax approaches, looting]
Macbeth: (dizzily) Who goes there? [almost dead]
Sycorax: Alack, I am afraid they have awakened, and it is not done. [Sycorax stabs Macbeth with Kabar] [Macbeth dies]
Epilogue: The ground that gave them first has them again: their pleasures here are past, so is their pain. Forbear to judge, for we are sinners all. Close up his eyes, and draw the curtain close; and let us all to meditation.This is the promised end.
DISCLAIMER: All lines and characters come from the deceased William Shakespeare, playwright and poet extraordinnaire. Names have been switched around - a line that comes from Hamlet may be directed at Macbeth, for example.
The Revenge of Valeria: A Tragedy
[Valeria, Macbeth enter from opposite sides, awestruck by each other] Valeria: What is't? A spirit? I might call him a thing divine; for nothing natural I ever saw so noble
MacBeth: O you wonder! Be you maid or no?
Valeria: No wonder, sir, but certainly a maid. By my modesty, I would not wish any companion in the world but you.
MacBeth: Hear my soul speak! The very instant that I saw you, did my heart fly to your service.
Valeria: Do you love me? [runs up to Macbeth]
MacBeth: I, beyond all limit of what else I' the world, do love, prize, honor you.
Valeria: I am your wife, if you will marry me.
MacBeth: My mistress, dearest, and I thus humble ever.
Valeria: My husband then?
Macbeth: You are my true and honorable wife. [embrace]
Valeria: (hesitantly) My lord, tell me the reason why thou wilt marry.
MacBeth: (dramatic) My poor body, madam, requires it; I am driven on by the flesh, and he must needs go that the devil drives.
Valeria: (mischievous) Do you think I meant country matters? [drive by, Valeria hit]
Valeria: (painfully) Ah! I am dying, MacBeth, dying. Convey me to my bed, then to my grave. The rest is silence. [dead]
MacBeth: Ah, my sweet Valeria. Woe to the hand that shed this costly blood! [taking Valeria offstage]
Orlando: I have done the deed, Sycorax. [gloating]
Sycorax: But soft, Orlando, behold! [berating]
Tybalt: (warningly) Talkers are no good doers. Orlando: If it were done, when 'tis done, then 'twere well it were done quickly. [Sycorax grabs Orlando's sleeve, exposing arm] Sycorax: Show me one scar characterized on thy skin. Men's flesh preserved so whole do seldom win. [accusing]
Orlando: (pulls arm away) No!- I defy all counsel. [Macbeth finishes leaving with body, leaves travel bags] [Sycorax approaches bad, takes out "sugar", pours in wine bottles]
Sycorax: Oh true apothecary, I pray thy drugs are quick.
Tybalt: (scorn)There's no more valor in that deed than in a wild duck.
Orlando: Here's Tybalt: an honest enough fellow. but he has not so much brains as ear wax.
Sycorax: Comes, let's make haste: he'll soon be back again. [turn to leave, Macbeth and Titania enter]
Macbeth: (grieving)One woe doth tread upon another's heel, so fast they follow. Your sister's dead, Titania.
Titania: (angry, desperate grief) Oh God, that I were a man! I would eat his heart in the marketplace! [Tybalt rushes Titania, scuffle, he loses]
Tybalt: [approaches, wild eyes] Kill Orlando! O happy dagger! This is the sheath!
Sycorax: (harsh) Treachery!
Titania: (gasps) THOU! The devil damn thee black, thou cream-faced loon!
Sycorax: (angry) Thy father slew my father; therefore die! [Titania and Sycorax fight, bo-staff] [Orlando tries to sneak off]
Macbeth: Turn, hell-hound, turn!
Orlando: Of all men else I have avoided thee. But get thee back: my soul is too much charged with blood of thine already.
Macbeth: I have no words; my voice is in my sword, thou bloodier villain than terms can give thee out! [Titania and Sycorax stop fighting to watch Orlando and Macbeth fight] [Sycorax runs away] [Macbeth wins, stealing Orlando's gun and killing him with it]
Macbeth: Valeria, thou art revenged, even with the sword that killed thee!
Titania: (quizzically) They laugh that win.
Macbeth: Thou doth not think how ill all's here about my heart; but it is no matter.
Titania: This is the poison of deep grief. [Macbeth pauses, grabs wine, lifts to mouth, pauses at Titania's reproving glance]
Titania: Macbeth!
Macbeth: Doth it show vilely on me to desire small beer?
Titania: (shakes head)Good night, Macbeth, good night. [Titania leaves]
[Macbeth drinks wine, chokes, falls] [Sycorax approaches, looting]
Macbeth: (dizzily) Who goes there? [almost dead]
Sycorax: Alack, I am afraid they have awakened, and it is not done. [Sycorax stabs Macbeth with Kabar] [Macbeth dies]
Epilogue: The ground that gave them first has them again: their pleasures here are past, so is their pain. Forbear to judge, for we are sinners all. Close up his eyes, and draw the curtain close; and let us all to meditation.This is the promised end.
