Phoebe
And so. my quest had begun but little did I know that there would never be an end, and I would hunt for my love forever. My mission draped a curtain over my eyes and I was blinded by my path of desperation and slowly. I came to the unavoidable conclusion that I was on my own on this infinite journey.
Part Two: I stand alone
Funny how time seems to blur by, as if I am a traveller on a never ending marry-go-round. I ride on the bleak and lifeless wooden horses as they thrust their frozen hoofs forward on an empty track. My eyes absorb the scene around me as visions meld into one big blur of pointless colours. An artist lost of inspiration; I stare with every tick of the clock at my blinded visions, full of hopelessness.
Voices sometimes drift in and out but I still pretend not to hear them. Like waves licking gently at the beach they wash over me but never inside of me. As if I am in an endless trance, I just feel myself nod .. But I barely feel myself, just a glimpse but then the cold iron door of bitter denial slams in my face and I submerge into my world of blurred visions again. The faces appear once in a while, randomly they haunt me and interlace their icy thoughts into mine. I sense their desperations mounting as they anxiously try to interact with me. to find that key into my heart and mind, to claim the lost sister they once had in an unmentionable time.
But I can't go back, not now and not ever. His scarlet blood stains my guilty hands day after day, his death playing like an old film broken down. It plays over and over again, always repeating the same looks; the same tears and the same bullets of pain shoot at me again and again. But no one will repair that broken film and I feel my heart captured as I fly off into a lost and broken world of my own, a world that I never asked to be in. How can I rectify the pain I have caused him? How can I undo all the scars he had slit so deeply within me?
Infinite questions centres my mind and my defeated heart, like a tornado it whirls around me over and over again. How I long to be set free from these endless questions, they're like prison guards, their grips icy cold, their eyes lifeless yet menacing in a nameless way. Coldheartedly, they hold me back from being set free of my own hell. People whom I once called my sisters no longer exist, like a trembling leaf, its branches cracking as it anticipates the grand launch of its journey, all memory of the past is carried off with the strong gale. The gusty wind dances my every memory like a thin ribbon of leaves as it prances lightly in the magical air.
I'm going to get Cole back. the words echo through the colossal empty quarters of my mind. A faint recall of the words propels dark shivers through my every vein, as the words groped out of the dark restricts of my throat, it floated out as lightly as a feather. The two people stared deeply into my weary but determined eyes, their narrowed doubtful ones reflected sharply into my own. I blinked to frantically break the eerie exchange of secret looks between them. Like a silent unbreakable code, they communicated through every concerned glance. I watched like a spectator, my hopes dissolved as quickly as it had surged in the unexplored recesses of my heart. I almost anticipated their every sympathetic, hesitant word. Their over-due light, sickening sisterly touches on my arm.
I could feel their doubts and suspicions, their last hopes dieing of a love-blinded widow shadowed by stubbornness. I didn't need their sceptical comfort; I didn't need their mocking reassurances that my path of destiny will suddenly detour from a treacherous alleyway into a bright and sunny road. Their tender touches and soft words hit me hard, suffocated me with every gasping breathe. Their hopeless comforts too viscously sickening to seek solace within, I am alone on my quest to save my love, their doubtful glances a long-expected confirmation of their lost support, I stand solitude in a wasteland of shattered dreams, and I continue on alone on my journey of hell to rectify the murder of my love.
Day after day, the rough familiar leather presses against my trembling hands, as my fingers gingerly lift the pages. My skin barely touching the rusty yellow aged paper, afraid to reach out to false hope. All my life, it has haunted me, coursed through my every vein. I watch silently as the once familiar faces observe me like a specimen within a glass case. They try but they can't shatter the unbreakable boundary of glass around me.
They watch me sympathetically; words flow out of their mouths as effortlessly as a river of water meandering through the bottomless valleys. Every word carried with it a heavy negative sound. telling me to give up, the harmony of their low and soft voices carving a song out of pain. A song I try to block out but with every failed spell, I hear it more and more clearly and the luminous sunlight of hope is slowly shadowed by their despair.
But I can no longer ignore the distraught cries of him. I feel his every yearning to touch me, just to see me. His eyes strain day after day and somehow, in the unspoken pit of my beaten heart, I know he's out there somewhere, be it a inexpressible void or a corroded wasteland of lost and broken hopes, I can feel his every scream as he defies the lethargic seduction of death. His strength deteriorating with every cry. Deprived of a body, a mind. what choice is there but to hang onto our abandoned passion?
I stand forlorn in my own failures, yet I still cling vigorously onto my last tatter of dreams and the last ray of hope still burns through.
TBC..
And so. my quest had begun but little did I know that there would never be an end, and I would hunt for my love forever. My mission draped a curtain over my eyes and I was blinded by my path of desperation and slowly. I came to the unavoidable conclusion that I was on my own on this infinite journey.
Part Two: I stand alone
Funny how time seems to blur by, as if I am a traveller on a never ending marry-go-round. I ride on the bleak and lifeless wooden horses as they thrust their frozen hoofs forward on an empty track. My eyes absorb the scene around me as visions meld into one big blur of pointless colours. An artist lost of inspiration; I stare with every tick of the clock at my blinded visions, full of hopelessness.
Voices sometimes drift in and out but I still pretend not to hear them. Like waves licking gently at the beach they wash over me but never inside of me. As if I am in an endless trance, I just feel myself nod .. But I barely feel myself, just a glimpse but then the cold iron door of bitter denial slams in my face and I submerge into my world of blurred visions again. The faces appear once in a while, randomly they haunt me and interlace their icy thoughts into mine. I sense their desperations mounting as they anxiously try to interact with me. to find that key into my heart and mind, to claim the lost sister they once had in an unmentionable time.
But I can't go back, not now and not ever. His scarlet blood stains my guilty hands day after day, his death playing like an old film broken down. It plays over and over again, always repeating the same looks; the same tears and the same bullets of pain shoot at me again and again. But no one will repair that broken film and I feel my heart captured as I fly off into a lost and broken world of my own, a world that I never asked to be in. How can I rectify the pain I have caused him? How can I undo all the scars he had slit so deeply within me?
Infinite questions centres my mind and my defeated heart, like a tornado it whirls around me over and over again. How I long to be set free from these endless questions, they're like prison guards, their grips icy cold, their eyes lifeless yet menacing in a nameless way. Coldheartedly, they hold me back from being set free of my own hell. People whom I once called my sisters no longer exist, like a trembling leaf, its branches cracking as it anticipates the grand launch of its journey, all memory of the past is carried off with the strong gale. The gusty wind dances my every memory like a thin ribbon of leaves as it prances lightly in the magical air.
I'm going to get Cole back. the words echo through the colossal empty quarters of my mind. A faint recall of the words propels dark shivers through my every vein, as the words groped out of the dark restricts of my throat, it floated out as lightly as a feather. The two people stared deeply into my weary but determined eyes, their narrowed doubtful ones reflected sharply into my own. I blinked to frantically break the eerie exchange of secret looks between them. Like a silent unbreakable code, they communicated through every concerned glance. I watched like a spectator, my hopes dissolved as quickly as it had surged in the unexplored recesses of my heart. I almost anticipated their every sympathetic, hesitant word. Their over-due light, sickening sisterly touches on my arm.
I could feel their doubts and suspicions, their last hopes dieing of a love-blinded widow shadowed by stubbornness. I didn't need their sceptical comfort; I didn't need their mocking reassurances that my path of destiny will suddenly detour from a treacherous alleyway into a bright and sunny road. Their tender touches and soft words hit me hard, suffocated me with every gasping breathe. Their hopeless comforts too viscously sickening to seek solace within, I am alone on my quest to save my love, their doubtful glances a long-expected confirmation of their lost support, I stand solitude in a wasteland of shattered dreams, and I continue on alone on my journey of hell to rectify the murder of my love.
Day after day, the rough familiar leather presses against my trembling hands, as my fingers gingerly lift the pages. My skin barely touching the rusty yellow aged paper, afraid to reach out to false hope. All my life, it has haunted me, coursed through my every vein. I watch silently as the once familiar faces observe me like a specimen within a glass case. They try but they can't shatter the unbreakable boundary of glass around me.
They watch me sympathetically; words flow out of their mouths as effortlessly as a river of water meandering through the bottomless valleys. Every word carried with it a heavy negative sound. telling me to give up, the harmony of their low and soft voices carving a song out of pain. A song I try to block out but with every failed spell, I hear it more and more clearly and the luminous sunlight of hope is slowly shadowed by their despair.
But I can no longer ignore the distraught cries of him. I feel his every yearning to touch me, just to see me. His eyes strain day after day and somehow, in the unspoken pit of my beaten heart, I know he's out there somewhere, be it a inexpressible void or a corroded wasteland of lost and broken hopes, I can feel his every scream as he defies the lethargic seduction of death. His strength deteriorating with every cry. Deprived of a body, a mind. what choice is there but to hang onto our abandoned passion?
I stand forlorn in my own failures, yet I still cling vigorously onto my last tatter of dreams and the last ray of hope still burns through.
TBC..
