Disclaimer: Rexy and I do not own the Harry Potter books, movies, or any of the characters (not even Wood*sigh*). That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. We are just borrowing their characters to use in our twisted little story.

Warning: This is the brainchild of insanity. Please proceed with caution, and watch out for the evil penguins. Also, whatever you do, DON'T GO INTO THE LIGHT!

Chapter Two - It's Not Hell, It's Our World by Princess Katie

"I can't believe this!" cried Ron. "It's like we're stuck in hell!"

"Tell me about it," Harry agreed miserably. "Our host is a freak!"

Oliver looked at them. "Who cares? I can't play Quidditch while I'm here! How I will live?" he screamed.

"Wood, shut up!" Harry hissed. "We're supposed to be pretending to be Muggles!"

"Well, it's easy enough for you to say," Ron snapped. "You lived with Muggles!"

Oliver nodded, and Harry rolled his eyes. "Fine. But you two could be trying a bit harder!"

Their little disagreement was about to explode into a full-fledged argument when Rexy entered the living room. "Time to go guys, we're going to my house!" She started laughing manically, crying, "Prepare to meet your doom!" Seeing the looks on their faces, she laughed and said, "Geez, I was just kidding. Lighten up!"

Silently, the boys got up and followed her out of the house as Katie waved good-bye. As the whale bus (Rexy's van) left, Katie commented absently to her guests, "Ten bucks Rexy gets Oliver in a month." Hermione and Ginny were stunned.

"Her? No way!" Ginny said.

"Trust meyou don't know Rexy," was all Katie said as she turned around and went into the house, followed by her baffled guests.

"Now I'm going to show you two your little room, and then I'm going to go online. If you don't like it, too bad," Katie said evenly, laughing inwardly. It was just one of those days when she took delight in being a bitch.

As she passed the kitchen, her mother glared at her. She sighed, and as soon as they were downstairs, she turned to her guests and smiled, "This is your room, it's not much, but oh well."

Hermione and Ginny were taken aback by their host's suddenly kinder attitude. They didn't quite know what to say. "You two get settled, unpack everything. Argue amongst yourselves about the bunks. Oh, yeah, let me show you how to operate the curtain for privacy." Katie said, walking to the side where a string hung. "Just pull this until it closes as far as you want it. Any questions?"

"No," Ginny said.

"Well, just one" Hermione said.

"What is it?"

"Will we able to see or talk to Harry and Ron? They are our friends you know."

"C'mon, you gotta be kidding me. Sam and I are best friends, we see each other all the damn time. And once we return to hell - I mean the school year starts - you'll see 'em every day."

"Oh, okay," Hermione said.

"Alright, I'm going upstairs for now." Katie said, leaving her guests to unpack and settle in.

The next day

"Oh Lord," Katie grumbled as a knock on her bedroom door awakened her, "is it morning already?" The knocking grew to a loud pounding, and Katie cried, "I'm up, yeesh! I'll be down in a few."

Katie brushed her chaotic hair into place and headed downstairs sleepily. As she opened the door that opened into the hall, she smelled something baking. Walking into the kitchen, she saw her mother. "Whatcha makin', Mom?"

"Muffins."

"Cool. Our guests up yet?"

"No, I thought I'd let you do the honors."

Katie sighed and headed down another set of stairs to the basement. As she rang the bell outside the closed curtain, she wondered how Rexy was doing.

The night before, Rexy's house- written by Rexy

"Now the fun will really begin" Rexy said under her breath as she took Oliver, Ron, and Harry into her house.

"What'd you say?" Harry asked.

"Nothing! Just follow me." Rexy led them through the kitchen, dining room, living room, and up a set of stairs. "The bathroom and the actual bedrooms are up here." Rexy explained.

"What do you mean by actual?" Ron asked.

"Well, yours and Harry's bedroom was, well, home-made."

"So we don't get an actual room?" Harry asked stupidly.

"DING DING! YOU WIN!" Rexy said sarcastically and then continued. "This is my room," Rexy said, opening a door. Inside, the walls were black and the ceiling was rainbow colored. There was a four post bed with shimmery-sheer black curtains and a hot pink bedspread. The one window had a pink curtain with a mist-black flowy one over it. Other than that, it was rather simple, with just a dresser, bookshelf, and night stand. There was Tool playing on her CD player and her closet was filled with black skirts, flowy shirts, boots, large baggy pants and Tinkerbell shirts. Harry and Ron glanced at each other uncomfortably. (A/N- I WISH my room was like that! But in real life, a four-poster would take up more than half of my room alone)

Rexy turned and led them back to the little hallway. "This is the only bathroom, and this is my parent's room. And THIS is where you'll be sleeping, Oliver!" Rexy opened another door, revealing a room about the size of a semi-large walk-in closet. There was a small desk, a bookshelf, a dresser, and a twin bed. Mickey and Minnie Mouse covered the blankets and sheets.

Rexy ran in the room and hastily tore them off of the bed. "Heh, I'll just change those" she said, putting on some white sheets and a navy comforter, "this was my little sister's room. Oliver, you can stay here and unpack, I can have Harry or Ron show you their room later if you want." Rexy said this in a sugar-coated voice. Harry and Ron just rolled there eyes.

"No, it's alright, I'll come now," Oliver set down his suitcase and followed Rexy, Harry, and Ron. She led them to the basement and opened a door. Inside there were two (nice) cots, two dressers, a small table and two folding chairs.

"We're staying here?!" Ron exclaimed.

"Yup, it's the best we could do." Rexy sighed.

"I am NOT sleeping here!" Harry said, violently slamming his suitcase down on one of the cots, causing it to collapse. He picked it up and started to unpack, all the while muttering he was not staying here.

Oliver and Rexy smirked and headed to their rooms.

The Next Morning (at Rexy's)

"What the hell!?" Harry ran up the stairs to the living room. He found Rexy setting a table with eggs, pancakes, bacon, and Cajun powder.

"What do you want?" Rexy practically shouted.

"The music! Turn it down! It's bloody 9 in the morning!" Ron screamed over the loud music.

"No way! I need a balance when cooking! And besides, you just CAN'T listen to Pearl Jam quietly!" Rexy defended herself, bringing out some plates and silverware. Rexy turned down the music and sat down.

Oliver came down the stairs.

"Good morning," Rexy greeted him and pointed to a chair. They all sat down and looked at the food oddly. "What? You don't think I can cook? Or you think I'd poison you? Oh yeah, THAT would be a good headline.GIRL KILLS EXCHANGE STUDENTS FROM BRITAIN. That could start a war," Rexy laughed and poured some Cajun powder on her eggs. She looked at the three boys and took a bite.

"Oh come on, I'm a good cook!" Rexy continued. They finally took a bite. The food was gone in a matter of 15 minutes. After they were finished eating and dressed, Rexy informed them that they would be meeting up with Katie, Hermione, and Ginny to go supply shopping for school. "We'll also have to get your British money exchanged for American money," she said, as she dialed Katie's house.