Chapter Twenty-three

"What happened?" Race demanded, erupting into Benton Quest's bedroom.

"He passed out," Barbara replied grimly.

"I did not," Benton protested. "I just got a little lightheaded and decided it might be better if I laid down for a bit."

"I found him lying in one of those reclining chairs in the center of the main lab," Barbara told Race, taking the stethoscope out of her ears and setting it on the bed beside her. Laying her palm on his cheek and putting her thumb under his chin, she turned his head toward her and flicked a light across his eyes, watching his pupil dilation response. "He was only about half conscious. His blood pressure had dropped like a stone and he was experiencing arrhythmia and shortness of breath."

"Those are heart attack symptoms!" Race exclaimed.

"They certainly are," Barbara agreed grimly.

"I was not having a heart attack!" Benton disagreed sharply. "Dammit, Barbara, you've told me what to watch for often enough since this all started and I know. There was no pain, no numbness in my arms, neck, or face, and I don't care what IRIS said, I wasn't feeling short of breath. I was just dizzy."

"Benton, this is not the time to . . ."

"Look," he said, pulling himself into a sitting position despite her frantic attempts to keep him prone, "I'm prepared to admit that I've got a problem, all right? But I really do think you're being alarmist about this. Yes, I got dizzy and had to sit down. But I was already better by the time you got there and now I feel fine. I can't explain it, but it's the truth."

"The fact that you feel fine now really isn't the point, Benton," Estella protested from her position in a nearby chair. "We need to get you to a place where they can monitor you more closely and figure out what the problem is."

He looked over at her in amusement. "You are a fine one to be lecturing me about doing things I shouldn't. What are you doing out of bed?"

Race cut both of them off. "Okay, enough is enough. Barbara, what do we do now?"

"We need to get him into the hospital where we can do a proper job of keeping an eye on him and start seriously searching for reasons for this. We've . . ."

"No," Benton said flatly. Race turned an angry glare on Benton, but before he could say anything, Benton continued. "I know what caused this, and it's not anything that a doctor is going to find during a series of tests."

Barbara stared hard at him for a long moment and then her shoulders sagged and she sighed. "I wish you would stop this. Can't you just let it go?"

Benton uttered a matching sigh, leaning wearily back against the headboard of the bed. "I wish I could. I have tried . . . really I have."

Race and Estella looked from one to the other in confusion. Race opened his mouth to ask a question, but Benton's next comment took away the need for it.

"Barbara, I'm worried sick about him. And he's just shutting me out."

"Do you really blame him, Benton?" she asked gently. "What did you say to him this time? It must have been something pretty harsh, because whatever it was set Jessie off. You know that she's been extremely supportive of you during this entire business. You told him he only had that job because he was your son, didn't you?"

Benton hung his head. "I didn't mean to. It just came out. I was angry," he said in a low voice. "I was trying to compromise, but he wouldn't listen again. I'd offered to pay his rent and get the admission ban at M.I.T. withdrawn . . . "

"In return for what?"

"I just asked him to cut back to part time at his job. I didn't ask him to quit. In fact, I told him that I knew he was capable of handling both things. And I didn't say a single word about his living arrangements." Benton shook his head. "I was upset . . . thinking about my argument with Jonny . . . and thinking about what Jessie said . . . " Benton looked up at Barbara desperately. "She could do it, Barbara! She could estrange us to the point where he'd never talk to me again. What am I going to do? I tried to call him back. I would have even talked to Jessie! But the phone didn't even ring. It just went straight to voice mail. And their computers are shut down, too. I can't reach him . . ."

The panicky note in his voice brought Race to the bedside quickly. Helping Barbara, they forced him to lie down again. "Just take it easy, Benton. There's a very simple explanation why you can't reach them. It's a weekday. Jess probably called right before she headed out for class, and Jonny's at work. They just aren't home. We'll try later this evening, all right? Right now, I want you to rest for a while. Sleep might be a good thing."

"Yes," Barbara agreed immediately. "That's an excellent idea."

"I'm not going to the hospital," he said with a trace of the old belligerence.

Barbara looked unhappy, but after a moment she replied, "Okay, let's compromise then. You're scheduled to go into Portland Medical Center next week for tests. I won't push you to go now, if you'll agree to stay there until I'm satisfied next week. Deal?"

After a moment, Benton nodded. "All right. I can accept that."

"Good. In the meantime, I want you to cut back on your work schedule a bit and I also want you to try to avoid stress. Let me talk to Jessie and Jonny this evening and I'll set up a time for them to come home and visit, and the four of us will sit down and talk after the tests in Portland are all finished. Can you live with that?"

"But what if Jessie . . ."

"Jess is not going to do anything to damage your relationship with Jonny," Race said firmly.

"Particularly if you don't talk with him between now and the time we all sit down together again," Barbara added. "Benton, she doesn't want to take Jonny away from you. You know that. But she's as defensive of him as he is of her. What you said obviously hurt him deeply and she reacted to that." She looked at him sympathetically. "I know it's hard, but aren't you pleased that she loves him enough to come to his defense that way?"

Benton was quiet for a long time. Finally, in a low voice, he replied, "She's so much like Rachel. Sometimes it terrifies me."

"Why?"

"Because I remember what it was like . . . losing her. I don't want that to happen to Jonny . . ."

She smiled at him sadly. "I know. But you can only protect your children just so far. And he does love her, Benton, and she loves him. Try to take comfort in that."

"Yes, I know."

"I want you to rest now while Race and I put Estella back to bed."

"All right." The look he gave her had a bit more spirit in it. "I suppose you're going to set IRIS to babysit again, too."

"You better believe it. And I'm going to expect her to let me know if you so much as stir out of that bed." Barbara glanced ceilingward. "You understand me, IRIS?"

"ACKNOWLEDGED. CONTINUE TO MONITOR VITAL SIGNS OF DR. BENTON QUEST AND NOTIFY DR. BARBARA MASON AND RACE BANNON OF ANY CHANGES OR ANY MOVEMENTS OF DR. BENTON QUEST FROM HIS CURRENT LOCATION."

"Very good."

"And don't even try to countermand the instructions, you hear me?" Race demanded of Benton.

"Yes, yes. I've got it. I'll behave."

Barbara rose from the bed as Race went to help Estella up out of the chair. With a parting comment of, "Just let IRIS know if you need anything," the three of them left the room, closing the door behind them. No one said anything until they had Estella settled comfortably back in bed again. Then Race said,

"I know you've probably got patients waiting, Barbara, but do you have a few more minutes?"

She looked at him speculatively for a minute and then sank down in a nearby chair. "I thought you had something on your mind. What is it?"

"Does it strike you that Benton's moods seem to be a little . . . " He trailed off, as if unable to find the right word.

"Volatile?" Barbara suggested.

Slowly, Race nodded. "That's as good as any, I guess."

"Yes, it does. And the differences are seriously marked. Like in the lighthouse today. I've never seen that side of Benton before."

"Neither have I, and I've know the man for fifteen years or more . . . lived with him almost 24 hours a day for more than ten. He's never acted this way before. In fact, some of the things I've heard him say and do over the last several months are things I never would have believed him capable of. Like the business with Jonny and M.I.T., or his comment about Jessie and Jonny after Jess broke the connection today. I don't care how angry he is, it's not in Benton Quest's nature to say that he's washing his hands of them."

"Or to tell Jonny that anything he's gotten is because he's his father's son," Estella added. "He's always been incredibly supportive of all of the kids, encouraging them to stretch their horizons and hone their skills."

"Exactly," Race agreed immediately. "There's a lot more going on here than Benton having a health problem, I think. I just can't figure out what."

Barbara contemplated that thoughtfully. "Stress seems to set it off and that triggers the physical problems. Is that it?"

"Well, isn't that the way it seems to work?"

"It does, actually," she replied slowly.

Race rose and paced the room in frustration. "The thing about it is, even if that's true, I don't see where it gets us."

"Maybe further than you'd think," Barbara replied. "I've been using the symptoms to try to find out the cause of the physical problems. But if you're right . . . if there's something else at work here, then the symptoms and their source may be secondary and could be misleading us."

"I don't follow," Race replied.

"Well, going backward, the physical symptoms may be showing up because of the endorphins and other chemicals that are released into the bloodstream as the result of stress, much like the mechanism that causes an individual to develop an ulcer from stress. And we've assumed that the stress is coming as a result of his problems with Jonny."

"Yes. So?"

"Well, Jess made an interesting comment to me back in May. She said that Benton's stress levels predated his problems with Jonny by several months. And when I questioned both Jonny and Hadji about it, they both agreed."

Race frowned. "Yeah, we've talked about that before. But what's the point?"

"The point is that all of this can generate stress, but stress in itself generally doesn't change a person's innate personality. It can make them short tempered, irritable, or depressed, but it's not going to change who they are. So what if the stress is also a symptom . . . that something is setting him up to be susceptible to the type of stress levels he's been experiencing." She sighed at her companions' twin expressions of confusion. "Look, most people as they grow up develop coping skills . . . ways of dealing with stress and strain. Some people exercise, some are creative, some take long, hot baths . . . you get the idea. Benton has always lived what most people would define as a stressful life, but he's always had outstanding coping skills, too."

"Work was the way he coped," Race said immediately.

"I'll take your word for it. But something seems to be breaking down his coping skills and allowing the stress to get to him. And whatever it is also seems to be changing his basic personality. So maybe we're looking in the wrong place for the source of the problem."

"Does this tell us where to look instead?" Race asked her.

Barbara sighed deeply and after a moment, she stood. "Unfortunately, no," she replied heavily. "But I'm going to keep working on it. Listen, I've got to go. You're right. I've got patients waiting and I'm already late. Keep an eye on him and call if you need me. I'll come out again later this evening and we'll try giving Jessie a call and see if we can diffuse this latest crisis."