Part Five ~ Missed Opportunities



That night Lorelai went to the diner, the same as the night before.

"You're going to Boston," Luke stated flatly. He flipped the 'closed' sign on the door after she entered.

Lorelai was crying. She nodded, "I'm so sorry Luke."

"What's to be sorry about?" he wiped down a table ferociously.

"I think I could love you in that way," Lorelai explained, "But I've always loved Chris. This is something we have to try. And Rory wants to go," she begged him to understand.

And he did, but that didn't make it any easier. Luke put down the cloth.

"I can't change your mind?" he had to try, "I promise I'll make you coffee every morning."

The corners of Lorelai's mouth twitched up to form a half-smile. But it was a sad, bittersweet smile. She could see herself living with Luke, loving Luke. But Chris had been her dream, her whole life for so long, and Lorelai couldn't help but think that was the way things were meant to be.

"Luke, we're friends. We work well as friends," she said.

"Yeah."

"And sometimes I think we could be more than friends."

"I would like that," Luke said.



"But I think we missed our moment."

"So that's it? It's too late?"

"Yeah. Don't you think it makes sense just to keep things the way they are?"

"With you in Boston?"

"Come on Luke, we'll always be friends, right?" Fresh tears welled up in Lorelai's eyes and she looked terrified that he would say no, making this even harder than it already was.

"Sure." Luke held out his arms and they hugged for a moment, than broke apart, still holding each other lightly.

"I'm gonna miss you," said Lorelai, "think of me sometimes?"

"Always," Luke promised.

"No," she corrected, "just sometimes."



***

Somehow I feel alive

But a part of me is dying

And I can feel the pain

Somewhere deep inside

A part of me is crying

Just crying out your name

Somewhere I'll dream of you

Somewhere where dreams come true

***



Lorelai could feel a part of her heart breaking. She had never felt so torn. She'd made the decision to go with Chris, that was what she wanted. But there had always been a something between her and Luke that had never been explored, and now it was too late.



***

If you look into my eyes

I love you though I'm leaving

I just wanna hold you tight

Don't ever compromise

And never stop believing

Believing we were right

Somewhere I'll dream of you

Somewhere where dreams come true

***



But there was one thing she had to do.

Lorelai looked up at Luke, leaned in and kissed his lips softly. Luke returned the kiss.

Their first and last kiss, Lorelai thought. She wiped a tear away, "I should be going," she whispered.

Luke just nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

"Hey Luke," Lorelai turned just before walking out the door, "good luck with the girl."

He looked at her questioningly.

"The girl who asked you out?" Lorelai reminded him.

"Sarah?"

"Yeah, call Sarah. Don't miss another opportunity. Be happy, Luke."



'Happy?' Luke thought as he watched her leave, how the hell was he supposed to be happy? He sat down on a stool and rubbed his face with his hands.

"If you love something set it free..." Jess quipped, appearing from the apartment.

"Shut up Jess," Luke snapped.

"You don't think it bothers me that Rory's moving to Boston?" his nephew asked.

"Yeah, too bad you came back here for nothing," said Luke.

"Nah, it was worth it," Jess said, "she kissed me."

Luke thought of Lorelai's kiss. Was it worth it? Five seconds of bliss after five years of longing? That didn't seem fair. But maybe that was the price he paid for waiting too long to take his chance. He honestly hoped she'd be happy. One of them should be.

"Hey Luke?" Jess said, "call the other chick."



"What are you my dating agent?" Luke asked, "would you let me recover from one thing at a time?"

"At your pace you'll be 40 before you meet another woman. Either make Lorelai stay or move on," Jess advised.

"I can't make her stay," Luke realised sadly. At least he had tried. At least she knew how he felt. And he knew that she loved him too. Just not enough.



TBC...