A/N:  Warning, this is a little disturbing.  Uh… I already started the next chapter, so that should be up soon.  Hope you all are still reading.  Why don't you review and let me know? (hint hint)        

BTW- The title of this chapter comes from (as they all have previously) The Josh Joplin Group.  The special thing about this one?  It is from their new CD.

Mark tried the door first.  It was locked and he searched in his pockets for a key.  "Shit, I forgot mine."

            "Here." Maureen sighed as she dug through her purse.  "I wonder why April locked the door, we never do."

            "She probably just went to bed, and you never know in this neighborhood."  Roger grabbed the key from Maureen and stepped in front of Mark.  He unlocked the door, but when he tried to open it, it only budged a little.  "What the fuck?"  He pushed harder.  "APRIL!  Move whatever the hell is blocking the door!"  He knocked and yelled.

            "Here, let me try."  I stepped up to the door and leaned into it with all of my body weight.  Roger joined me and we were able to budge the door enough to get inside.  

            "April?"  Roger called out.
            "Shh! She's probably sleeping, remember?"
            "Yeah, I know, but…" April had moved the coffee table to block the door.  "What if something happened?"  I pointed to the table.  "She was obviously trying to keep someone out."

            "Yeah, but who?"  Mark said quietly.

            "APRIL!"  Roger bolted for their room.  "She's not in there."

            All at once we turned to the bathroom.  "Fuck!"  Roger got there first and tried pushing on the door, but of course she locked it.  "Collins!" 

            "Ok."  I went over and again we threw our bodies into the door, this time knocking it off the hinges.

            None of us were prepared for what greeted us.  April's body was limply lying against the wall, one hand was gripping a yellow lined piece of paper.

 "Oh God," I muttered under my breath.

"APRIL!"  Roger screamed.

"Shit…" Mark muttered, pulling Maureen away from the door.

Roger remained still, frozen in his tracks.  "Oh shit… oh shit… April… no… no… oh shit…"

"Shh Roger."  I patted his shoulder and approached her body.  I absently felt for a pulse in her neck, knowing full well I wouldn't find one.  I examined her wrist and then pulled the note from her grip.  I glanced at it quickly and then shoved it in my pocket.

"I called 911."  Mark said as he reentered the bathroom.  "Is she?"

"No… she's going to be…" Roger sputtered out.

"Roger… no… she's not." I looked up at him, "I'm sorry."  Mark approached her body and reached out to touch her.  I grabbed his arm, "No. Don't."

"Her eyes," he said with panic in his voice. "They'll still open."

"OK, I'll do it. Just don't touch her."

"Oh shit… nonononoshitnoAprilno."

"Mark, get him out of here."  I went over the young girl and gently shut her eyes.  When I knew Mark had pulled Roger away, I pulled out the note from my pocket.  The handwriting was shaky, almost as if she had decided at the very last minute to write it.  In fact, the note seemed unfinished.  We have AIDS.  Oh God, how was I going to give this to him?

"April, how could you?" I remained close to her, whispering, "You took the easy way out.  I should have known.  You kept hinting at it.  Fuck, why didn't I notice?"

"Collins?"  Mark uneasily spoke.  "What's that?"  He nodded to the piece of paper in my hand.

"She left this for Roger."

He nodded slightly.  "He left."

"What?"  I stood up.  "Where did he go?"

"I don't know.  To get wasted, probably. I tried to stop him, but he pushed me out of the way."

I took a deep breath and walked near the door, pulling Mark out with me.  "Maybe it is for the best.  He doesn't need to see the paramedics come for her, you know?"

"Yeah, that is why I didn't really try to stop him."  When we were safely in the living room, Mark went over to the couch and sat next to Maureen.  She was bawling and automatically collapsed into his lap.  He began stroking her hair.

"Why did she do it?"  Maureen asked between sobs.

"Baby, I don't think we'll ever know," Mark said in a calm, soothing voice.  He spoke to her as if she were a child. 

"Actually," I handed the note to Mark.  "We do know."

            He silently took it from me.  "Oh, God."  The color in his already pale face completely disappeared, as he shut his eyes.  "No, she's wrong.  Impossible."

            "What, Pookie?" Maureen sat up and he handed her the note. She read it, and then looked up at me. "What?" 

            "She's wrong." Mark said calmly, standing up.  "I mean, how could they, how could she…"

            "You know very well how, Mark."

 He took a deep breath.  "No, he wouldn't be so stupid."

"The hell he wouldn't!"  Maureen shrieked.  "Mark, he's a junkie.  Do you think he really cares where his smack is coming from or who used the needle before him?  No! He only cares about getting high."

"No, he promised me.  He told me that he was careful."  Mark sounded like he was trying to convince himself more than us.

The sirens that were the usual background noise grew louder while we talked.  I knew the paramedics would be arriving in a moment, so I left Mark and Maureen and met them outside.  I showed them up to the loft, explaining what had happened. 

It was very routine for them. Two of them worked in the bathroom and a third took our statement. The three of us watched silently as they carried her body out in a bag.