What he said, what he heard

Okay this is my very, I mean very first fic. Basically it's what the title says. The Gundam pilots say something but they each hear it differently. This: (***) means action. And this: *jhgj* means my comments. This is non- yaoi and non-shonen ai. Also I'm not sure which episode this is from.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. So don't sue.

(Duo is thrown into the OZ dungeon) What Heero said: Heero: Botched you're mission. You couldn't destroy the base and you couldn't eliminate Dr. J and the others.

What Duo heard: Heero: You screwed up, you baka. Now Dr. J is still running around in his under wear. God, you're such a moron.

What Duo said: Duo: How 'bout a little sympathy? In any case I'm still glad I decided to come here. I've got good news, (looks at Wufei) your Gundam and mine are being rebuilt as we speak ya know. I can hardly wait until they're done.

What Heero heard: Duo: I know I'm a moron, don't rub it in. *sorry Duo fans! * I can't believe I came here for you idiots. But (looks at Wufei) our Gundams are being rebuilt. I'm so excited! I'll get to see Deathsythe again! I think I'm gonna wet myself!

What Heero said: Heero: Looks like OZ'll be keeping us alive for a while. It's a good chance so don't die yet.

What Duo heard: Heero: Looks like OZ needs us. So don't die. I need you to keep Relena off my ass. *no offence to Relena lovers*

What Duo said: Duo: Don't worry about me pal. I have no intention of dyin' that easily. There's the colonies to fight for. Just watch me I'll become the God of Death once more! But right now.I need some sleep.

What Heero heard: Duo: Don't worry. Only you can kill me. *no shonen ai intended* Besides the colonies need to be defended. Since they can't seem to fight for themselves. Soon I'll be the God of Death again! But, God I need some sleep.

(The cell doors open) OZ soldier: Get out zero one.

What Duo said: Duo: Come on how come him again. I'm a better pilot than zero one is ya know; let me take care of the next battle.

What they heard: Duo: (In a whiney voice) Why can't I go. He always gets to go. I'm a much better pilot than any of you. Let me go blow stuff up.

What Trowa said: Trowa: You can't do it in your shape. Even a skilled Gundam pilot runs the risk of being destroyed. (Takes a couple steps) Because it's a Gundam pilot you'll be fighting.

What they heard: Trowa: You got so beaten up you're going to die anyway. You'll probably fall asleep in the middle of the battle. (Takes a couple steps) Besides you're fighting a Gundam pilot you'll get blown up anyway.

Wufei: What?

What Trowa said: Trowa: Apparently it's a new model. (Heero hmms) He wiped out a whole OZ division with one suit.

What they heard: Trowa: It's a brand new one. (Heero hmms) He's blown up a lot of stuff.

What Heero said: Heero: What are it's characteristics and weapons?

What they heard: Heero: What and how much did it blow up?

What Trowa said: Trowa: The engineers asked the same questions, that shows that you're familiar with them.

What they heard: Trowa: Dr. J asked the same questions, wow you guys have a lot in common.

What Heero said: Heero: Okay, lets go. With that red one, the Mercurious, this should prove to be quite a fight.

What they heard: Heero: God, not again. But at least I get to pilot the Mercurious, damn this'll be a hard fight.

What Trowa said: Trowa: You're coming like it or not.

What they heard: Trowa: Quite your whining and lets go.

What Duo said: Duo: And you'll just stand back and watch as the two Gundam pilots fight each other. (Stands up) Hey! Zero one! Don't do it! It's probably a suit performance test!

What they heard: Duo: And you'll just sit back and relax as they destroy each other. (Stands up) Hey! Zero one! Go for it! Since I can't go you might as well die!

What Trowa said: Trowa: (Hits Duo) (Duo groans) You guys just better keep quiet there. You'll get your turn eventually.

What they heard: Trowa: (Hits Duo) (Duo groans) Shut up braided baka. I won't let you go if you don't keep quiet.

(Trowa, Heero and the two OZ soldiers walk out of the room) (Duo moans and the door closes)

What Wufei said: Wufei: I. don't think that guy was acting. We have to assume that he really has betrayed us.

What Duo heard: Wufei: Did it really hurt when he hit you? I can't believe he betrayed us. That's injustice!

What Duo said: Duo: We don't need to worry about that. He's one guy we can trust.

What Wufei heard: Duo: Hey just take it easy. We can trust him.

What Wufei said: Wufei: What makes you so sure?

What Duo heard: Wufei: Have you gone insane?! He just hit you!

(Duo turns on a portable hologram device) (Wufei hmms)

What Duo said: Duo: (chuckles) Because no traitor's gonna bring us a gift like this that so much thoughts been put into.

What Wufei heard: Duo: (chuckles) Because no traitor's gonna just hand me such a nice gift. And it's hand held!

What Wufei said: Wufei: Hey that's."

What Duo heard: Wufei: What the?!"

(Trowa's voice is heard on the device)

What Trowa said: Trowa: Duo Maxwell and Wufei Chang, this was given to me by Master O. Use it to pass time.

What they heard: Trowa: Braided Boy and Justice Boy, this was given to me by that dope O. Keep it hidden from the guards!

What Wufei said: Wufei: Son of a gun. Hn.

What Duo heard: Wufei: He finally served justice.

What Duo said: Duo: Right?

What Wufei heard: Duo: Yeah really.

So whatch' think? Good? Bad? Lame? I'll do more if any one wants. I am a girl if you're wondering. Also I'd like to thank my sister (The Goddess of Death) for helping me with these ideas. Just something we thought would be funny. Oh and baka means stupid, idiot ect. Please R&R!