A/N Well Well Well. Here we are, updated. Be warned: Captain Falcon shows
signs of humanity, emotion, and unprettiness. If this is too much for you
to bear, then I suggest you turn back now. Do you have any idea how hard
it is to write an epic limerick?!
-------------------------------------Captain Falcon: A Legend Relived
Dearest Cappie would start his day soon
He was up and dressed; it was only noon!
A primp and a prink
Over the bathroom sink
About which cosmetics and clothing were strewn.
Cappie wandered about, now fully delicious,
His panties in a bundle to do something vicious.
He scanned for a victim
And heard a dictum
From a voice on his shoulder that was quite surreptitious.
"You can't do this!" cried the winged hallucination.
"'Tis not right merely because it causes thee elation!"
"What about that poor soul
Over whose fate you take control
That does not wish to be part of your combination!"
This had never occurred to Cappie before!
Or perhaps it was something he chose to ignore.
But he was sure that he had read
He was SURE someone had said
His motto. "All the world's a whore!"
To add to his confusion Cappie soon saw
Another little feller to lay down the law
"Don't let Bernie tear you apart!
That ugly little bleeding heart."
Cappie stood, drooling in awe.
"If frequent casual sex is what you need
While your partner flies, flaming, with speed,
Then go to it, man!
You, with your muscles and tan
Who wouldn't want such a manly steed?!"
Cappie was frustrated, needless to say.
He was raping carelessly yesterday!
Suddenly he felt remorse.
This was very ugly, of course
So he sent Bernir flaming into the gray.
Cappie decided his conscious was overrated.
It was a manifestation that he hated.
To rape or not to rape
Put him in quite a scrape
And never again was it something he debated.
-------------------------------------Captain Falcon: A Legend Relived
Dearest Cappie would start his day soon
He was up and dressed; it was only noon!
A primp and a prink
Over the bathroom sink
About which cosmetics and clothing were strewn.
Cappie wandered about, now fully delicious,
His panties in a bundle to do something vicious.
He scanned for a victim
And heard a dictum
From a voice on his shoulder that was quite surreptitious.
"You can't do this!" cried the winged hallucination.
"'Tis not right merely because it causes thee elation!"
"What about that poor soul
Over whose fate you take control
That does not wish to be part of your combination!"
This had never occurred to Cappie before!
Or perhaps it was something he chose to ignore.
But he was sure that he had read
He was SURE someone had said
His motto. "All the world's a whore!"
To add to his confusion Cappie soon saw
Another little feller to lay down the law
"Don't let Bernie tear you apart!
That ugly little bleeding heart."
Cappie stood, drooling in awe.
"If frequent casual sex is what you need
While your partner flies, flaming, with speed,
Then go to it, man!
You, with your muscles and tan
Who wouldn't want such a manly steed?!"
Cappie was frustrated, needless to say.
He was raping carelessly yesterday!
Suddenly he felt remorse.
This was very ugly, of course
So he sent Bernir flaming into the gray.
Cappie decided his conscious was overrated.
It was a manifestation that he hated.
To rape or not to rape
Put him in quite a scrape
And never again was it something he debated.
