Note: I am REALLY sorry that the paragraphs aren't indented. My computer does that
when it uploads the document. If it really bugs you, please mail me and I'll be happy to send you
my .txt version of the chapter so that it's a bit easier on your eyes.
And about the Tallest being so flippin' TALL. . . you have to figure, they're hunched
over. If they stood up straight they'd be really tall. I'm talking about their height when they're
standing up straight. So. . . you kind of see where I'm coming from?
And now! More madness.
"Disguise?" questioned Purple. "What kinda disguise?"
Zim cleared his throat, and gave Purple a knowing look. "Ahh, my Tallest. A great
disguise. Yes. So amazing a disguise, that I do not doubt that you will weep with confusion at
how such an AMAZING disguise could ever be conceived. Conceived by my thoughtmeats! I
AM ZIM!" He leapt away from Purple and over to the computer.
"COMPUTER!" yelled Zim.
"I DIDN'T DO IT!!!"
Zim blinked. "Do. . . what?"
"NOTHING!! I SWEAR!!!"
"Uh. . ." Zim looked back at Purple, who shrugged. Suddenly GIR ran by, his head
aflame.
"YAAAHHHH!!" He ran on, and out of the room.
"Alright. . . good. Yes." Zim looked nervously back at Purple. "That, uh, that was
supposed to happen." He turned back to the computer. "Computer! COSTUME FOR
TALLEST!"
The computer groaned and pulled up the screen with Purple's costume options on it. Zim
flipped through them quickly, eager to please his Tallest.
He seemed to have decided upon one. "Howzat one?" He pointed at it to show Purple.
Purple lit up, a pleased grin on his face.
"Yeeeah! It shows off my, 'a-hem', better features." He lifted his chin proudly. "I am
ready for SKOOL!" *
*******
"Class," hissed Ms. Bitters. "The darkness is slowly closing in upon you, so I suggest you
listen while you are still free of the darkness! SSS! The monsters will eat you once it arrives, so
enjoy what pitiful life you have left."
The class cowered in their desks.
Ms. Bitters continued, "We have *another* student. They just keep coming. His name is.
. . uh. . . Purple? Oh, come on, what kind of name is that? Good lord. . ."
Purple ducked under the doorway into the classroom. The class gaped open-mouthed at
him. He forced a grin. "Hey! I'm Purple! I like food! You're all reeeal short!"
Zita raised her hand. Purple looked at her and cocked his head, silently saying, "What do
you want?" She put her hand down.
"Why you so TALL?" She stared at the back of Zim's head. "Zim ain't that tall!!"
"I. . . uh. . ." Purple looked at Zim for help. Zim waved his arms frantically and slammed
his head against his desk twice, apparently trying to tell Purple something. "I eat a lot," Purple
finished lamely.
Zita giggled.
"What? What is it?!" Purple asked, annoyed.
Zim panicked. "PURPLE, like Zim, is NORMAL! HE IS ZIM'S NORMAL COUSIN!"
He looked at the class and hissed before slithering back into his seat.
Zita giggled again, and pointed at Purple. "HE'S WEARIN' A DRESS!!!" The entire
class burst out laughing. Purple frowned, feeling put out. Dress? C'mon, it didn't look *that*
much like a dress. The giggling slowed, and Ms. Bitters materialized on the ceiling, hanging
upside down like a bat.
"SIT!" yelled Ms. Bitters. "Sit NOW, or suffer!" She disappeared in a puff of smoke.
When the smoke cleared, she was sitting at her desk. Purple did his best to crouch into one of the
empty desks. His knees were folded against his chest and his shoulders were hunched. The class
giggled again. Ms. Bitters continued, "Now, the lesson for today is-"
Suddenly, the door to the class room burst open. It was Dib, panting heavily, obviously
having just run from somewhere. "Sorry I'm late! I was watching locker 312 again to see if the
brain-sucking squirrel would come ou-" He stopped in the middle of his sentence, and his mouth
hung open as he took in the tall figure crouched in his seat. "YOU!!" he yelled. "NOW
THERE'S TWO!!" He pointed at Purple, then at Zim, then at Purple again. "AND YOU'RE IN
MY SEAT!"
"Aww, man," muttered Sara. "Dib's goin' at the alien thing again. . ."
"Look!" shouted Dib. "That 'guy' is probably nine feet tall!! How can you possibly think
he's our age?!!"
"Do you KNOW TO WHOM YOU SPEAK!?!" shrieked Zim. "You speak to one of the
ALMI-" he stopped dead. "AlmmmMcMeatie's drones!!"
Dib glared at Zim. "So, he has a job? At OUR age? Or is he. . ." Dib's eyes shifted back
and forth, all crafty-like, ". . AN ALIEN!!!"
"Don't be silly!" shouted Purple. "I am no alien! That's Zim!" Dib grinned triumphantly,
and Purple slapped his hands over his mouth.
"See?! Somebody ELSE said that Zim's an alien! I'm not the only one! I'm not crazy,
I'm! I'm! HAHAHAHA!!" Dib ran out of the room, shrieking with laughter.
The entire class was silent.
"Yeeah, he's crazy," said Zim, breaking the quiet. The entire class started up again,
talking about how Dib really was pretty. . . crazy. I mean, aliens didn't even *exist*. Yeah. Dib's
crazy.
*Picture of Purple's costume can be found at:
http://chooseyourbanners.homestead.com/files/purplehumancostume.jpg
I know. . . short. Bleah. I just needed to get something out. More soon, m'kay?
when it uploads the document. If it really bugs you, please mail me and I'll be happy to send you
my .txt version of the chapter so that it's a bit easier on your eyes.
And about the Tallest being so flippin' TALL. . . you have to figure, they're hunched
over. If they stood up straight they'd be really tall. I'm talking about their height when they're
standing up straight. So. . . you kind of see where I'm coming from?
And now! More madness.
"Disguise?" questioned Purple. "What kinda disguise?"
Zim cleared his throat, and gave Purple a knowing look. "Ahh, my Tallest. A great
disguise. Yes. So amazing a disguise, that I do not doubt that you will weep with confusion at
how such an AMAZING disguise could ever be conceived. Conceived by my thoughtmeats! I
AM ZIM!" He leapt away from Purple and over to the computer.
"COMPUTER!" yelled Zim.
"I DIDN'T DO IT!!!"
Zim blinked. "Do. . . what?"
"NOTHING!! I SWEAR!!!"
"Uh. . ." Zim looked back at Purple, who shrugged. Suddenly GIR ran by, his head
aflame.
"YAAAHHHH!!" He ran on, and out of the room.
"Alright. . . good. Yes." Zim looked nervously back at Purple. "That, uh, that was
supposed to happen." He turned back to the computer. "Computer! COSTUME FOR
TALLEST!"
The computer groaned and pulled up the screen with Purple's costume options on it. Zim
flipped through them quickly, eager to please his Tallest.
He seemed to have decided upon one. "Howzat one?" He pointed at it to show Purple.
Purple lit up, a pleased grin on his face.
"Yeeeah! It shows off my, 'a-hem', better features." He lifted his chin proudly. "I am
ready for SKOOL!" *
*******
"Class," hissed Ms. Bitters. "The darkness is slowly closing in upon you, so I suggest you
listen while you are still free of the darkness! SSS! The monsters will eat you once it arrives, so
enjoy what pitiful life you have left."
The class cowered in their desks.
Ms. Bitters continued, "We have *another* student. They just keep coming. His name is.
. . uh. . . Purple? Oh, come on, what kind of name is that? Good lord. . ."
Purple ducked under the doorway into the classroom. The class gaped open-mouthed at
him. He forced a grin. "Hey! I'm Purple! I like food! You're all reeeal short!"
Zita raised her hand. Purple looked at her and cocked his head, silently saying, "What do
you want?" She put her hand down.
"Why you so TALL?" She stared at the back of Zim's head. "Zim ain't that tall!!"
"I. . . uh. . ." Purple looked at Zim for help. Zim waved his arms frantically and slammed
his head against his desk twice, apparently trying to tell Purple something. "I eat a lot," Purple
finished lamely.
Zita giggled.
"What? What is it?!" Purple asked, annoyed.
Zim panicked. "PURPLE, like Zim, is NORMAL! HE IS ZIM'S NORMAL COUSIN!"
He looked at the class and hissed before slithering back into his seat.
Zita giggled again, and pointed at Purple. "HE'S WEARIN' A DRESS!!!" The entire
class burst out laughing. Purple frowned, feeling put out. Dress? C'mon, it didn't look *that*
much like a dress. The giggling slowed, and Ms. Bitters materialized on the ceiling, hanging
upside down like a bat.
"SIT!" yelled Ms. Bitters. "Sit NOW, or suffer!" She disappeared in a puff of smoke.
When the smoke cleared, she was sitting at her desk. Purple did his best to crouch into one of the
empty desks. His knees were folded against his chest and his shoulders were hunched. The class
giggled again. Ms. Bitters continued, "Now, the lesson for today is-"
Suddenly, the door to the class room burst open. It was Dib, panting heavily, obviously
having just run from somewhere. "Sorry I'm late! I was watching locker 312 again to see if the
brain-sucking squirrel would come ou-" He stopped in the middle of his sentence, and his mouth
hung open as he took in the tall figure crouched in his seat. "YOU!!" he yelled. "NOW
THERE'S TWO!!" He pointed at Purple, then at Zim, then at Purple again. "AND YOU'RE IN
MY SEAT!"
"Aww, man," muttered Sara. "Dib's goin' at the alien thing again. . ."
"Look!" shouted Dib. "That 'guy' is probably nine feet tall!! How can you possibly think
he's our age?!!"
"Do you KNOW TO WHOM YOU SPEAK!?!" shrieked Zim. "You speak to one of the
ALMI-" he stopped dead. "AlmmmMcMeatie's drones!!"
Dib glared at Zim. "So, he has a job? At OUR age? Or is he. . ." Dib's eyes shifted back
and forth, all crafty-like, ". . AN ALIEN!!!"
"Don't be silly!" shouted Purple. "I am no alien! That's Zim!" Dib grinned triumphantly,
and Purple slapped his hands over his mouth.
"See?! Somebody ELSE said that Zim's an alien! I'm not the only one! I'm not crazy,
I'm! I'm! HAHAHAHA!!" Dib ran out of the room, shrieking with laughter.
The entire class was silent.
"Yeeah, he's crazy," said Zim, breaking the quiet. The entire class started up again,
talking about how Dib really was pretty. . . crazy. I mean, aliens didn't even *exist*. Yeah. Dib's
crazy.
*Picture of Purple's costume can be found at:
http://chooseyourbanners.homestead.com/files/purplehumancostume.jpg
I know. . . short. Bleah. I just needed to get something out. More soon, m'kay?
