DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything that is Tolkien's…..
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ALIYA
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The first thing I saw when I awoke was Legolas. He was smiling that smile he had. For what reason …I did not know.
As my eyes adjusted to the light, I tried to sit up, but found everything spun and there was intense pain in my stomach. I struggled harder to move, only inflicting more pain.
"No, Melamin…" Legolas said, pushing me back down gently, "Rest…"
He sat on the edge of my bed, looking down at me.
I closed my eyes, I could not look into his eyes as I once had. I felt his hand on my cheek, running down to my neck. He placed a kiss on my forehead, causing me to open my eyes again and look at him through my pain.
When I did, he was not looking at me, but at the wall in front of me.
"I love you…" he said, turning his head to look back down.
I knew what he wanted me to say. I knew he wanted me to say that I loved him too.
"I love you too…" I said, but my heart was not in my words, not yet, anyways.
"I'm sorry…" he said now, "So sorry for everything."
I knew he meant it, but could I believe it? How could I believe anything anymore?
I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I had not cried in a long while.
"Don't cry!" he said, looking at me with concern, "I don't want to see you cry."
His words offended me, "What do you want to see, then? I said, "My happiness? I lost the child, Legolas! After all of it… I LOST IT….and I feel like I'm losing you!" It hurt to yell, but it was worth it to hear his words reassuring.
"You will never lose me!" he said, his words earnest.
"Then I fear I will lose your love!" I said, not realizing that I had just revealed my biggest fear.
"Lose my love?" he questioned, "What would make my love for you die?"
He kissed me. On the lips this time, and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close to him. It reminded me of the times, so long ago, when I had first come to Mirkwood Palace. I felt small again.
"I love you more than anything in this world, Aliya…"He said quietly, "I love you more than the sun and the moon and the stars. I would give my life if you would be content for the rest of yours. Don't ever feel like I do not love you. It would be a lie to yourself. I want to be with you forever. I love you."
I cried harder at these words, feeling like they were not meant for me. I did not deserve them. I had not been good enough to deserve Legolas and a life with him. I didn't know what to say. I just gripped his shirt and cried.
"I don't know what I can do…" I said weakly, letting him hold me longer, "I don't know what I can say to make myself believe I deserve this. I don't think I am worthy of your love. You can do better than me."
He shook his head at me, "Put that from your mind. There is no one else for me, but you."
"I love you…" I repeated my earlier words, this time believing them.
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I know, it was a bit sappy…….I promise you…….the next chapters are good, but they are fast paced……..
