Here I Am
Chapter 6
Wishing on a dream that seems far off
Hoping it will come today
Into the starlit night
Foolish dreamers turn their gaze
Waiting on a shooting star
But…
What if that star is not to come?
Will their dreams fade to nothing?
When the horizon darkens most
We all need to believe there is hope
Is an angel watching closely over me?
Can there be a guiding light I've yet to see?
I know my heart should guide me but
There's a hole within my soul
What will fill this emptiness inside of me?
Am I to be satisfied without knowing?
I wish then for a chance to see
Now all I need
Is my star to come…
(Wind Nocturne: LSSS check this link out, it is very cute
and very sad, it has the song:
http://www.geocities.co.jp/Milkyway-Lynx/9043/c-song.swf
I hope that works. It has nothing to do with the story,
I thought I would just share it.)
A week has passed since Serena ran into Raye.
A week has passed since she finally conquered enough courage to go home.
A week has gone by since part of the past was resolved.
It seemed too easy for her that her relationship with her parents has
reconstructed itself to trust, love, and understanding. She couldn't help but
feel as if there was a catch somewhere, that she missed something on the
way there. She held a pen in her hand, and a newspaper on the other.
She had nothing better to do today, than do the crosswords in the
Newspaper, something she never did, but thought would try.
Later, she would visit her parents again, and they would talk, and laugh.
Everything would seem perfect. Yet, they would never
forget the past, the silence. It was the silence that hurt them the
most. She didn't understand why people always suggested to
"forgive and forget". Things shouldn't be forgotten anyway, what
lessons would you learn from forgotten mistakes?
The phone ringing shook her awake from thinking.
"Hold up...I almost got it......Hold on...I hate crosswords...
...Okay, okay, fine!" She grabbed the phone and brought it by her
ear, still half thinking about the answer.
"Moshi moshi."
"Hello? Serena?"
"Speaking, who may I ask is this?" She wondered, the voice familiar, but
unfamiliar...
"It's Raye...uh, remember me?" A strong voice, sounding a little offended,
said on the other line.
"Raye! Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't recognize your voice..." she trailed off there,
not wanting to offend her friend even more.
"Don't' worry about it, I have like 10 pens in my mouth right now.
Listen, you're probably wondering where I got your number, and why I'm
calling you...I got it from Ally...and because I was wondering if you could meet
me at the park in say...an hour?"
"The park?"
"Yes, I need to talk to you about something,"
"Can't we talk about it on the phone?" Serena asked, unaware that she sounded a
little snobbish.
"Well, yeah, but I thought it'd be better to say it to you in person," Raye said,
a little frustrated.
"Oh...uh sure...whereabouts...No, that's not it..." she ended with inaudible whisper.
"You'll spot me right off...I'll be the one waving at every car I see.
Is an hour long enough?"
"Yeah, sure. "
"Okay, great, I'll see you then."
"Okay."
Serena hang up the phone.
"Hmm...wonder what this is all about. Knowing my luck, she's going to start
talking about how stupid I was...no...we're too mature for that...well, it's
going to be bad news, I know it." She went back to her crossword...
"SMAP!!…oh, it's not SMAP?! I give up!" She threw the newspaper on the table,
grabbed a jacket and locked her apartment door. She laughed at the thought
of Raye waving at every car. At their age it was funny, especially since she
wasn't going to be driving a car to the park, but walking there. That's why
she was already out of her apartment in two minutes. The day was gorgeous,
like it should be for summer in Japan. She loved walking in the streets, even
if all she saw were buildings upon buildings. Still, it was better than driving
a car. She never felt comfortable behind a car anyway, she was always tense,
and that was dangerous, she knew that.
It didn't take her long to get to the park. She was 15 minutes early, even
though she had stopped by an ice cream store, which happened to be on her
way. It took her a while to decide between vanilla and chocolate, and in the
end she took a double scoop of both. She looked around for Raye and saw no sign
of her friend yet. She decided to sit at the first bench she saw. She looked at
her watch. It was early; she remembered as a teenager during summer, she would
still be asleep. It was strange how things change fast. Then again, nothing ever
stayed the same; life wouldn't be worth living that way. There were a lot of
joggers running about in the park, and she watched as each one of them huffed and
puffed. She was glad she had great metabolism, even for her age, so that she
wouldn't need to watch what she ate or exercise. That was one thing that never
changed, her laziness. Although, it did improved.
"Serena?" A hand came into view. She looked up and saw a smiling Raye, her hair
tied behind her.
"Good morning, Serena."
"Hey, Raye, good morning," she smiled. Raye sits down besides her, folding her
hands on her lap.
"I didn't think you would be up this early, I mean it's barely 10 o'clock.
I was a little hesitant in calling you, I didn't want to wake you up. I mean,
I just thought, since you were taking a break that you would be sleeping in..."
Raye began, choosing to end her sentence there.
"Well, I would usually, but things change, you know. Habits are broken, sometimes
anyway." They enjoyed a few minutes of silence before either one of them spoke again.
"So, what did you want to talk about?" Serena asked, looking at her friend.
"Well, I know it's kind of a last minute thing, but the girls are getting together
tonight," Raye said with hesitation, her cheeks turning pink.
"Oh?" Serena raised an eyebrow in curiosity.
"Yes, and I thought it would be like old times if you came too. It's just a sleep
over at Lita's apartment. Would you be interested in coming?" Serena looked away
and up at the sky. There wasn't much to see, just the blue sky up above and a
couple of wispy clouds.
"Sure, it's time for a reunion anyway, right?" she finally said.
"Great!" Raye jumped up to her feet, excitement clearly showing in her voice and
within her face.
"I'm going to go tell the girls! See you later, Serena."
"Raye, wait!" Serena yelled after her friend,
"Yeah?"
"Uh...what time? And Lita hasn't moved over the last few years has she?"
"7 o'clock, right after dinner, I think. I really hope you come, but if you
can't, call us please! And no, she hasn't moved! Bye!"
'Why do you seem so excited, Raye? It really feels like we're still teenager...like
we haven't grown up at all. I guess no one ever grows up, they just change."
Serena said quietly to herself. "Still, it is exciting…if only things worked
out the way we want them to. Perfectly."
''''''''''''''''''
Darien didn't know why he bothered to even come with the girls to lunch.
They hardly talked to him most of the time. Usually he just sat there,
eavesdropping once in a while and reading a book most of the time. Yet,
somehow, he always seemed to be there.
"Hey, Darien," 4 women greeted him as he sat down. The restaurant was not a
fancy one. It was quiet though, and the food was great. One thing he really
liked about it was the fact that it was clean!
"Hey, girls, what's on the menu today?" He asked, feeling his stomach growl.
He had neglected to eat breakfast this morning.
"Same as usual, Kitty just came up and asked for our orders. We ordered for
you if that's okay," Mina said, smiling.
"Sure, as long as you ordered something nice." He chuckled, feeling a little
strange. He saw each one of his friends smile at him, then frown, exchanging
looks.
"Wow, it's been a while since we heard you laugh, I mean even a chuckle!"
Raye said, "What's up? Why are you suddenly so...well...kind of..."
"Happy!" Lita finished for her. Each one of them eyed him, waiting for his
response. He shrank back in his seats…Strange how embarrassed he felt.
"Whoa…nothing, it's just such a beautiful day!" In fact he wasn't lying. He
had nothing to be happy about, least of all the weather. He was mystified
himself as to why he was so happy all of a sudden. After his run, he just felt...
invigorated, as if a breath of fresh air healed all of his pains away. It was
strange...really. He couldn't complain though, it was the first time he felt so
light, as if a big burden on his shoulders had somehow been lifted.
"You've got to be happy about something! You can't just be happy for the sake
of happiness," Raye began.
"Well, technically he can..."
"Amy!" They glared at her, and when she shrank back into her seat, they fixed their
eyes on him again.
"Come on, Darien, we're your friends…friends don't keep secrets from one another,"
Mina innocently said, putting on a puppy face.
"Oh you know that's BS...come on guys, for real, I have no idea why I'm in such a
good mood. I just...am...simple as that!" He lightly tapped the table as he ended
his sentence, silencing the girls a little. They still didn't believe his reasoning,
but not wanting to risk having him in a good mood, they backed off. A few minutes
later, their lunch came.
"So, are we excited about the Slumber Party?" Raye asked them, winking her eyes.
Darien was silently reading his book at the corner, eating his lunch slowly, a
nd pretending not to be listening.
"Damn right we are! It's been such a long time since we were all there," Lita
pointed out.
"Hmm, I can't wait to see..." A hand clamped down on Mina's mouth, her words
turning to mumbles. Darien looked up and frowned. Unsure as to why they were keeping
something from him.
"You can't wait to see what?" Darien asked Mina, staring at her with raised eyebrows.
"Uh...she can't wait to see...what...I've done with my room!" Lita covered for her.
"You did something with your room? Okay...then, why would you need to keep that a
secret from me, Raye?" Darien now turned his gaze to Raye.
"Um…well…because I...I...thought...that...Lita was...uh...still...uh...
working on it."
"So?"
"So...um...I didn't want to...you know..."
"No, I don't know." Raye sighed.
"Well, if you don't know, I'm not going to tell you!"
The others fell back...trying hard not to laugh. Darien almost fell off his seat.
"Okay, I don't believe a word you say, but for once you are freaking me out, so I
am just going back to my book now." Raye was secretly relieved that Darien didn't
press for more. She patted her back for getting him off her case.
"Is it for sure?" Amy asked quietly, hoping the others understood her question.
"It is, it's for sure," Raye answered, eyeing Darien.
"I'm glad, because things needed a change."
"I know what you mean," Lita stated. The others nodded in excitement.
To Darien it was weird. He believed none of what Raye had given him. He didn't
understand what was going on! He supposed it was a girl thing, and it was something
they would be too embarrassed with to tell him. He couldn't come up with another
reason other than that. It seemed to make sense, though. He left it alone, for now
anyway. A part of him, deep in his heart, hoped it was something else. That someone
was coming, someone they haven't seen for a long time. He ignored that though, he
didn't want to hope. He didn't even know what he would say to her,he wasn't even sure
if he loved her still or not. It was foolish to love somebody for so long...
it really was.
~~~~~~
Again, I apologize that the story is a little screwed up. And on to Avril Lavigne,
sorry I put that she was American, she is Canadian. I knew that, I was just watching
American Idol so America came to mind. She's actually from a little town in Ontario,
Canada...I think. Sorry.
Chapter 6
Wishing on a dream that seems far off
Hoping it will come today
Into the starlit night
Foolish dreamers turn their gaze
Waiting on a shooting star
But…
What if that star is not to come?
Will their dreams fade to nothing?
When the horizon darkens most
We all need to believe there is hope
Is an angel watching closely over me?
Can there be a guiding light I've yet to see?
I know my heart should guide me but
There's a hole within my soul
What will fill this emptiness inside of me?
Am I to be satisfied without knowing?
I wish then for a chance to see
Now all I need
Is my star to come…
(Wind Nocturne: LSSS check this link out, it is very cute
and very sad, it has the song:
http://www.geocities.co.jp/Milkyway-Lynx/9043/c-song.swf
I hope that works. It has nothing to do with the story,
I thought I would just share it.)
A week has passed since Serena ran into Raye.
A week has passed since she finally conquered enough courage to go home.
A week has gone by since part of the past was resolved.
It seemed too easy for her that her relationship with her parents has
reconstructed itself to trust, love, and understanding. She couldn't help but
feel as if there was a catch somewhere, that she missed something on the
way there. She held a pen in her hand, and a newspaper on the other.
She had nothing better to do today, than do the crosswords in the
Newspaper, something she never did, but thought would try.
Later, she would visit her parents again, and they would talk, and laugh.
Everything would seem perfect. Yet, they would never
forget the past, the silence. It was the silence that hurt them the
most. She didn't understand why people always suggested to
"forgive and forget". Things shouldn't be forgotten anyway, what
lessons would you learn from forgotten mistakes?
The phone ringing shook her awake from thinking.
"Hold up...I almost got it......Hold on...I hate crosswords...
...Okay, okay, fine!" She grabbed the phone and brought it by her
ear, still half thinking about the answer.
"Moshi moshi."
"Hello? Serena?"
"Speaking, who may I ask is this?" She wondered, the voice familiar, but
unfamiliar...
"It's Raye...uh, remember me?" A strong voice, sounding a little offended,
said on the other line.
"Raye! Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't recognize your voice..." she trailed off there,
not wanting to offend her friend even more.
"Don't' worry about it, I have like 10 pens in my mouth right now.
Listen, you're probably wondering where I got your number, and why I'm
calling you...I got it from Ally...and because I was wondering if you could meet
me at the park in say...an hour?"
"The park?"
"Yes, I need to talk to you about something,"
"Can't we talk about it on the phone?" Serena asked, unaware that she sounded a
little snobbish.
"Well, yeah, but I thought it'd be better to say it to you in person," Raye said,
a little frustrated.
"Oh...uh sure...whereabouts...No, that's not it..." she ended with inaudible whisper.
"You'll spot me right off...I'll be the one waving at every car I see.
Is an hour long enough?"
"Yeah, sure. "
"Okay, great, I'll see you then."
"Okay."
Serena hang up the phone.
"Hmm...wonder what this is all about. Knowing my luck, she's going to start
talking about how stupid I was...no...we're too mature for that...well, it's
going to be bad news, I know it." She went back to her crossword...
"SMAP!!…oh, it's not SMAP?! I give up!" She threw the newspaper on the table,
grabbed a jacket and locked her apartment door. She laughed at the thought
of Raye waving at every car. At their age it was funny, especially since she
wasn't going to be driving a car to the park, but walking there. That's why
she was already out of her apartment in two minutes. The day was gorgeous,
like it should be for summer in Japan. She loved walking in the streets, even
if all she saw were buildings upon buildings. Still, it was better than driving
a car. She never felt comfortable behind a car anyway, she was always tense,
and that was dangerous, she knew that.
It didn't take her long to get to the park. She was 15 minutes early, even
though she had stopped by an ice cream store, which happened to be on her
way. It took her a while to decide between vanilla and chocolate, and in the
end she took a double scoop of both. She looked around for Raye and saw no sign
of her friend yet. She decided to sit at the first bench she saw. She looked at
her watch. It was early; she remembered as a teenager during summer, she would
still be asleep. It was strange how things change fast. Then again, nothing ever
stayed the same; life wouldn't be worth living that way. There were a lot of
joggers running about in the park, and she watched as each one of them huffed and
puffed. She was glad she had great metabolism, even for her age, so that she
wouldn't need to watch what she ate or exercise. That was one thing that never
changed, her laziness. Although, it did improved.
"Serena?" A hand came into view. She looked up and saw a smiling Raye, her hair
tied behind her.
"Good morning, Serena."
"Hey, Raye, good morning," she smiled. Raye sits down besides her, folding her
hands on her lap.
"I didn't think you would be up this early, I mean it's barely 10 o'clock.
I was a little hesitant in calling you, I didn't want to wake you up. I mean,
I just thought, since you were taking a break that you would be sleeping in..."
Raye began, choosing to end her sentence there.
"Well, I would usually, but things change, you know. Habits are broken, sometimes
anyway." They enjoyed a few minutes of silence before either one of them spoke again.
"So, what did you want to talk about?" Serena asked, looking at her friend.
"Well, I know it's kind of a last minute thing, but the girls are getting together
tonight," Raye said with hesitation, her cheeks turning pink.
"Oh?" Serena raised an eyebrow in curiosity.
"Yes, and I thought it would be like old times if you came too. It's just a sleep
over at Lita's apartment. Would you be interested in coming?" Serena looked away
and up at the sky. There wasn't much to see, just the blue sky up above and a
couple of wispy clouds.
"Sure, it's time for a reunion anyway, right?" she finally said.
"Great!" Raye jumped up to her feet, excitement clearly showing in her voice and
within her face.
"I'm going to go tell the girls! See you later, Serena."
"Raye, wait!" Serena yelled after her friend,
"Yeah?"
"Uh...what time? And Lita hasn't moved over the last few years has she?"
"7 o'clock, right after dinner, I think. I really hope you come, but if you
can't, call us please! And no, she hasn't moved! Bye!"
'Why do you seem so excited, Raye? It really feels like we're still teenager...like
we haven't grown up at all. I guess no one ever grows up, they just change."
Serena said quietly to herself. "Still, it is exciting…if only things worked
out the way we want them to. Perfectly."
''''''''''''''''''
Darien didn't know why he bothered to even come with the girls to lunch.
They hardly talked to him most of the time. Usually he just sat there,
eavesdropping once in a while and reading a book most of the time. Yet,
somehow, he always seemed to be there.
"Hey, Darien," 4 women greeted him as he sat down. The restaurant was not a
fancy one. It was quiet though, and the food was great. One thing he really
liked about it was the fact that it was clean!
"Hey, girls, what's on the menu today?" He asked, feeling his stomach growl.
He had neglected to eat breakfast this morning.
"Same as usual, Kitty just came up and asked for our orders. We ordered for
you if that's okay," Mina said, smiling.
"Sure, as long as you ordered something nice." He chuckled, feeling a little
strange. He saw each one of his friends smile at him, then frown, exchanging
looks.
"Wow, it's been a while since we heard you laugh, I mean even a chuckle!"
Raye said, "What's up? Why are you suddenly so...well...kind of..."
"Happy!" Lita finished for her. Each one of them eyed him, waiting for his
response. He shrank back in his seats…Strange how embarrassed he felt.
"Whoa…nothing, it's just such a beautiful day!" In fact he wasn't lying. He
had nothing to be happy about, least of all the weather. He was mystified
himself as to why he was so happy all of a sudden. After his run, he just felt...
invigorated, as if a breath of fresh air healed all of his pains away. It was
strange...really. He couldn't complain though, it was the first time he felt so
light, as if a big burden on his shoulders had somehow been lifted.
"You've got to be happy about something! You can't just be happy for the sake
of happiness," Raye began.
"Well, technically he can..."
"Amy!" They glared at her, and when she shrank back into her seat, they fixed their
eyes on him again.
"Come on, Darien, we're your friends…friends don't keep secrets from one another,"
Mina innocently said, putting on a puppy face.
"Oh you know that's BS...come on guys, for real, I have no idea why I'm in such a
good mood. I just...am...simple as that!" He lightly tapped the table as he ended
his sentence, silencing the girls a little. They still didn't believe his reasoning,
but not wanting to risk having him in a good mood, they backed off. A few minutes
later, their lunch came.
"So, are we excited about the Slumber Party?" Raye asked them, winking her eyes.
Darien was silently reading his book at the corner, eating his lunch slowly, a
nd pretending not to be listening.
"Damn right we are! It's been such a long time since we were all there," Lita
pointed out.
"Hmm, I can't wait to see..." A hand clamped down on Mina's mouth, her words
turning to mumbles. Darien looked up and frowned. Unsure as to why they were keeping
something from him.
"You can't wait to see what?" Darien asked Mina, staring at her with raised eyebrows.
"Uh...she can't wait to see...what...I've done with my room!" Lita covered for her.
"You did something with your room? Okay...then, why would you need to keep that a
secret from me, Raye?" Darien now turned his gaze to Raye.
"Um…well…because I...I...thought...that...Lita was...uh...still...uh...
working on it."
"So?"
"So...um...I didn't want to...you know..."
"No, I don't know." Raye sighed.
"Well, if you don't know, I'm not going to tell you!"
The others fell back...trying hard not to laugh. Darien almost fell off his seat.
"Okay, I don't believe a word you say, but for once you are freaking me out, so I
am just going back to my book now." Raye was secretly relieved that Darien didn't
press for more. She patted her back for getting him off her case.
"Is it for sure?" Amy asked quietly, hoping the others understood her question.
"It is, it's for sure," Raye answered, eyeing Darien.
"I'm glad, because things needed a change."
"I know what you mean," Lita stated. The others nodded in excitement.
To Darien it was weird. He believed none of what Raye had given him. He didn't
understand what was going on! He supposed it was a girl thing, and it was something
they would be too embarrassed with to tell him. He couldn't come up with another
reason other than that. It seemed to make sense, though. He left it alone, for now
anyway. A part of him, deep in his heart, hoped it was something else. That someone
was coming, someone they haven't seen for a long time. He ignored that though, he
didn't want to hope. He didn't even know what he would say to her,he wasn't even sure
if he loved her still or not. It was foolish to love somebody for so long...
it really was.
~~~~~~
Again, I apologize that the story is a little screwed up. And on to Avril Lavigne,
sorry I put that she was American, she is Canadian. I knew that, I was just watching
American Idol so America came to mind. She's actually from a little town in Ontario,
Canada...I think. Sorry.
