I don't own any X-Men Evolution characters. I set this story just before 'Stuff of Villains'. Poor Todd! Nothing ever goes right for him now does it?
Why Do Fools Fall in Love?
It was late Sunday evening. Wanda was in her room sulking while the boys were hanging around the living room. They were reacting to Lance's latest idea.
"Lance you actually gonna show your face around school?" Todd blinked. "You know they're just gonna throw you out on your butt as soon as you get there!"
"You don't know that for certain," Lance said. "We may not get expelled."
"Lance we destroyed the parking lot," Fred told him. "Something tells me we're expelled. No big deal. Ain't exactly the first school I've been thrown out of. Heck it ain't even the third school I've been thrown out of."
"Yeah those X-Geeks are chumps wanting to go back," Todd said. "We get enough abuse! Who needs more? Besides, Kelly's just gonna make their lives miserable until they go anyway!"
"Yeah and even if they graduate by some miracle who's gonna hire them for anything?" Fred said. "We're mutants. Only thing we're good at is fighting."
"That sounds like Magneto talking," Lance snapped.
"Yeah well for once Mag-nut-o is right," Todd said. "Take a reality check Lance. Even if you didn't get expelled they'd just drive you away anyway. Humans will never accept us. Look at the X-Geeks! They saved an entire city and are they treated like heroes? No! They're considered the scum of the earth by the entire school!"
"True, but I ain't scared of them!" Lance left the room.
"And he calls us dumb?" Fred sighed. "What'cha doing Toad?"
"I'm coming up with a new way to show my sweetheart how much I care!" Todd called out as he searched the hall closet.
"Oh and what brilliant plan are you going to come up with this time?" Fred sighed.
"This!" Todd held up Lance's guitar.
"Hey that's Lance's guitar!" Fred said. "Watch it! Or he'll kill you!"
"Nah!" Todd waved. "Lance won't mind if I borrow this for a bit. I need it to serenade my sweetheart tonight."
"Good luck!" Fred told him. "She won't come out of her room."
"Then I'll go into hers," Todd said.
"You're going into Wanda's room?" Fred's mouth hung open. "And just what would you like on your tombstone?"
"Don't worry!" Todd waved. "I got it all figured out!" He started to strum the guitar. He began to sing. "All you need is love! All you need is love! All you need is loooove!"
That was when Lance calmly walked back into the room and yanked the guitar out of his hands. "Then you won't need my guitar," Lance told him.
"Uh hi Lance," Todd smiled weakly. "I was just looking for you. I found your guitar."
"Toad I'm not going to kill you for touching my stuff," Lance growled. "Because if I'm lucky Wanda will do it for me!" He took a swipe at Todd who hopped out of his reach.
"Where are you going?" Fred asked.
"Off to see my ladylove yo!" Todd called out happily.
"There he goes," Fred sighed. "Dead man walking."
"Yeah," Lance sat down and started to idly strum his guitar. "Love's nothing but a pain anyway. Just causes you trouble. Nothing but trouble…"
"Oh no," Fred held his head in his hands. "Here we go!"
"What?" Lance looked at him.
"You're gonna whine and mope about Kitty again!" Fred snapped. "And as usual I have to listen to it!"
"I am not going to mope over Kitty!" Lance said angrily. "I am through with her!"
"Glad to hear it."
"Even though I thought she was special I have learned my lesson," Lance said. "So what if she broke my heart? Broke it into a million pieces. Big deal! So what if she stopped talking to me? Who cares? Not me. I just thought that…"
"I knew it," Fred sighed and put his head into his hands.
Back upstairs Todd had decided to put some flowers on Wanda's bed when she was out. She had left the room for a moment. This was the opportunity he wanted. He snuck into her room using the window. "Perfect!" He smiled. "Now all I gotta do is leave these roses on her bed with this note attached and she'll fall for me like a ton of bricks."
He put them on the bed and was about to leave when he noticed something. "Hey is that a diary?" He picked up a journal. "I wonder if there's anything about me in here? Letssee…Things To Do. Oh a list. Kill Father. Kill Pietro. Destroy the X-Men. Avoid my insane housemates. Especially Toad! Hey she mentioned me! And she doesn't want to kill me! That's progress! Yeah she wants me!"
Todd put down the journal and smiled. "I can see it now! One day she will go on a date with me and then…" He hummed the wedding march.
He picked up one of her discarded nightgowns and danced around with it. "Ah my dear Wanda," He purred as he held it close to his cheek. "Someday I'll show you I'm the guy for you…Someday dare I dream?" He hummed the wedding march again. "Mr. and Mrs. Todd Tolensky. Or maybe Mrs. Maximoff-Tolensky. Mr. and Mrs…."
"TOAD!" Wanda screamed as she came into the room. She glared at Todd holding her nightgown.
"Uh hi honey!" Todd waved weakly. "I got you some flowers!"
"TOAD!" Wanda screamed, various objects were already flying around the room. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM?"
"Uh would you believe that it was an accident?" Todd gulped.
Back downstairs Lance was lying down on the couch. "The thing of it all that I was so sure she was the one! You know what I'm saying?"
"Yeah," Fred was sitting in another chair writing something down on a piece of paper. "Go on…"
"I'm not talking a simple one night stand here. I mean a real relationship," Lance continued. "Now I know I've made mistakes but I'm not the only one here! I mean you have to admit that she…" He looked over. "Freddy what are you writing?"
"Oh just the grocery list," Fred told him. "I just remembered we're out of nuts."
"COME ON BABE! I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY!" Todd screamed. They both turned their heads and watched several objects flying around attacking Todd. "I DIDN'T MEAN TO TOUCH YOUR NIGHTGOWN OR READ YOUR DIARY! HONEST!"
"YOU READ MY DIARY?" Wanda screamed. "THAT'S IT! YOU'RE DEAD!"
"Should we do something?" Lance asked as Wanda went on a rampage."
"Nah," Fred shrugged. "Let's just sit back and watch 'em?"
"Are you sure that's a good idea?"
"Well it's better than what's on TV anyway," Fred shrugged as they watched Wanda chase Todd all over the house.
"Good point," Lance remarked. "Maybe we should make some popcorn?"
"I could go for that," Fred nodded.
