Writer's Block Is Evil
An Insane Fan Fiction by Yui Kinomoto
Disclaimer: I do not own Pokemon, any of the authors I may mention, or anything else I make a reference to in this fic except for me and my original characters. Thank you.
A/N: Dunno why I'm writing this. It's probably going to turn out as a totally insane series, like "All in a Day's Insanity" by The Crimson Lugia, "Eskimo Jolteon" by Lccorp2 the were-Umbreon or "Pidgey and Me" by PyroVulpix. Oh yes, you must go read these too. They're great! Heehee… Whenever I find time to update this, like when I feel like it or have major writer's block, I will. Okies? Yay! Now… On with the craziness! Muahaha!!
Chapter 1
It started out as any normal day would have started: All the Gym Leaders of Kanto and Johto, including the Elite Four, were gathered around a huge table, all talking amongst each other. Why? Because I put them there. This is my fic.
Erika: You see, that's the point we're trying to make here!!
Uh… Okay, they're talking. Time for fic to start and narrator to leave. *runs off*
Blaine: Uh… What's the point?
Erika: We're constantly getting thrown around in author's fics! They think just because they're the authors, they can do anything they want with us!!
Jasmine: Actually, Erika… They can.
Erika: -_-;;;
Misty: But she has a point. How much longer can we take this? People keep pairing me with Ash… *shudders*
Bruno: And thanks to our dear friend Yui, The Crimson Lugia and Lccorp2 have been killing Koga and I off in some of their fics! ;_; Poor crushed me…
Koga: *sits bawling in the corner*
Falkner: But what can we do about it? We're only characters, after all…
Morty: I say we take control of this fic. That way, we can get back at the authors for everything they've done, and put them in all kinds of crazy situations!!!
All: YEAH!!
Whitney: But, how are we going to do that?
Morty: Oh, I have a plan…
(Sheesh… Sounds scary, doesn't it? What is Morty's plan? What will the characters make the authors do if they get their chance? Read on…)
Yui: Ah, it's such a nice day. I wonder what I should write today…
Bugsy: Hey, Yui! Over here!
Yui: Hey, what are you guys doing here? I didn't call you over…
Sabrina: Someone wants to see you…
Janine: A certain blond boy with a cute headband…
Yui: *eyes become hearts* Morty? Where? Where is this incredible cuteness?
Bugsy: He's over that way! *points* Waiting just for you, Yui!
Yui: Hai! Kawaii-cute Morty-chan!! *takes off*
(Minutes later, Yui reaches the spot where Morty is standing. All of their surroundings are pink, and anime-hearts float around everywhere)
Morty: *in a dreamy bishounen voice* I've been waiting for you, Yui…
Yui: Oh, Morty… *skips toward him*
Clair: NOW!!!
(All of a sudden, a cage drops out of nowhere, falling around Yui!)
Yui: Huh? What's going on?
(She stares around as the gym leaders/elite people surround her)
Brock: We've got our bait! Now it's time for us to have a little fun!
Yui: …Excuse me?
Lt. Surge: This fic is OURS!!
(Random cheers and shouts rise up from the crowd)
Yui: Hoo boy… This is what I get for trying to write at 4:30 AM…
(Meanwhile, in an author's lounge somewhere…)
The Crimson Lugia: *emptying the fridge of all the cookies* I'm so bored.
PyroVulpix: Yeah, me too. *burns a random piece of paper with a Flamethrower*
Lccorp2: I can't think of a single thing to write in Eskimo Jolteon. *gulps down chlorinated bleach* There's nothing to do!
Pro_V: Maybe we should go outside and get some fresh air. That'd be nice.
PV: Yeah… Hey, where's Yui? She said she would show up here later!
Pro_V: Not sure. She's usually on when she says she'll be… But sometimes she takes off.
TCL: What say we go look for her?
All: OKAY!!
(So the authors all head outside, unaware of the trap that's been set for them…)
Pryce: *looking through a pair of binoculars from a treehouse* I see them! A group of authors headed this way!
Lance: *does a hand-motion like Mr. Burns* Excellent.
Karen: Whoa, don't do that… it's freaky. o_O
Lance: Sorry.
Blue: They're here! Quick, someone get down there with the bait!
Morty: We're on it. Come on!
Sabrina: Right: *helps him teleport the cage containing Yui down in front of the authors*
TCL: Huh? Yui?
Yui: RUN, IT'S A TRAP!
Morty: Muhahaha! We've got your fellow author!
Sabrina: Now, you will do as we say, or she'll never escape!
Yui: -_-;;;
Pro_V: All right, all right. What do you want, you double-crossers?
Morty: You must be a part of OUR fic.
Sabrina: *laughs evilly*
Pro_V: Is that all? Well, I'll do it.
Yui: Oh no! Don't give in!
Lc2: Well, all they wanna do is write a fic about us. How bad can it be?
(Morty and Sabrina give them all evil glares)
PV: Somehow, I get the feeling we're gonna regret this.
Yui: Don't I know it…
(Ooh… What kind of crazy fic will the gym leaders write, now that they've got the power to control the authors? Read on to find out…)
Falkner: And now presenting, for the first time ever…
Brock: AUTHORS!!
Bugsy: By us, your lovely and faithful gym leaders!
Will: …AND Elite Four.
Whitney: Wouldn't it literally be the Elite 5?
Lance: NO! I am not of the Elite Four, I am the Champion!!
Misty: Whatever… On with the story!!!
Lt. Surge: One day, The Crimson Lugia was sitting around, doing nothing.
TCL: …I'm bored. I wish there was something to do. *grumbles about something*
Morty: When along came Tracey Sketchit, all prepared with a brand new sketchbook!
Tracey: Wow! A rare Crimson Lugia! I've just gotta make a sketch of this!!!
TCL: *hesitates* …Go ahead, Tracey. *strikes a lame pose*
Tracey: Oh wow! *sketches while munching on Lugia-shaped cookies*
Yui: That was just wrong!!!
Morty: Just wait until your part….
Yui: Ugh…
Erika: Then, Lccorp2 came along, followed by his faithful pal, Espeon!!
Lc2: Hey… Espeon, friend…
Espeon: Take THIS! *whacks him with a mallet* This is for all the cruel and unusual treatment I got in Eskimo Jolteon!!!
Lc2:Ow. x_x Well, this is easy. I'll just transform into my Umbreon form and defeat you easily.
Chuck: But Lccorp2 found that he couldn't transform, by some odd twist of fate!
Lc2: Oh… damn.
Espeon: *wielding the mallet* Oh, my lovely author, where are you?
Lc2: O_O
Sabrina: Next we have PyroVulpix, who has been separated from his friends, Pidgey and Rattata.
PV: Oh, who needs them? At least I have my cheese nips.
Jasmine: Pyro looks in his bag, to find that there ARE NO CHEESE NIPS!! Pidgey and Rattata must have eaten them all before they left!!!
PV: …NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Janine: And, it looks like his fire powers have run out too!!!
PV: ….Double NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Yui: …This is mean.
Pryce: Our second last author to be featured is Pro_V. Everything's going totally normal for her…
Pro_V: Normal? Since when am I normal? o_O
Blaine: Pro_V logs onto her computer to find… GASP! All of her folders of Lance images have been deleted!
Pro_V: ;_; Wataru-chan, gone?
Clair: Not to mention that the world president randomly decided to gather up all the Mello Yello on the planet and shoot it into the sun.
Pro_V: OH COME ON!!! ;_;
Blue: And so ends our evil author fic!!!!
Nearly everyone: WAIT!!!
Blue: What?
Whitney: We forgot about her… *glares at Yui*
Blue: Oh yeah… *evil grin*
Yui: Oh no… Don't you even come near me… GUYS!! HELP!!!
(But TCL is still, by binding of the fic, stuck in her stupid pose while being sketched, and Lc2 is being pounded by Espeon. PyroVulpix is desperately trying to strike a Flamethrower, and Pro_V is trying to recover her Lance files, so nobody can help her.)
Yui: NOOOO!!!
(Later…)
Will: One day, Yui was walking. She noticed Morty and Whitney walking hand-in-hand on the other end of the road.
Yui: No… Anything but that…
Bruno: Then, her computer crashed, and all of her backup disks exploded!
Yui: NO!!!
Koga: Then, all of her Pokemon cards and donuts got thrown into the pit of Mount Doom!!!
Yui: NOOOOO!!!
Karen: The end!! ^_^
Authors: Grr… We'll get them back for this…
Lance: Sure you will. Hehehe…
(What are the authors planning for the Gym Leaders? Will they get their revenge, or just get stuck in another nightmare? Find out next time on, "Writer's Block is Evil!")
