Major thankies for checking out my new fanfiction , My Name is Jeff on FictionPress !

I will continue to create more fanfictions dedicated to real people or fictional characters who have faded away into obscurity !

Jeff Stinco 's story will be told for the very first time , so please stay tuned !

Also , to my abusive and very rude , very snotty , very mean , very crazy , ghetto hoodrat caregiver possibly trying her best to find this fanfiction on my tablet , PLEASE STOP CALLING ME A FEMALE DOG SO MUCH !

I SERIOUSLY HATE BEING CALLED THAT WORD , AND STOP COMPARING ME TO MY DAD !

I DO NOT LOOK LIKE HIM , NOR DO I RESEMBLE HIM IN THE MOST WAYS POSSIBLE !

PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT MY DAD SO MUCH , YOU 'RE TOO OBSESSED WITH HIM AND MY MOM HATES YOU TOO !

I WISH YOU WEREN 'T MY CAREGIVER SO THAT I OUGHTA SPRAY YOU WITH MY CAN OF BUCKET SPRAY OF PERFUME !

I AM NOT A BITCH , I AM NOT LIKE MY DAD , I AM NOT A DUDE , I AM MELLY JANE VALENTE !

I AM A REAL HUMAN BEING WITH A WHOLE LOT OF PROBLEMS I NEED TO GO THROUGH IN MY LIFE !

PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE AND LET ME DO MY FANFICTION ALREADY , SO I CAN GET RID OF MY PANIC ATTACKS , ASTHMA ATTACKS , AND MY SEIZURES !

OKAY ?

I DON 'T WANT BRITNEY SPEARS TO BE REMEMBERED AS THE ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD PREMIERE GIRL , SHE IS NOT LIKE THAT !

I WANT THOSE PHOTOS REMOVED FOREVER UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE !

PLEASE STOP CALLING ME A BITCH , PLEASE STOP COMPARING ME TO MY DAD , PLEASE STOP SAYING I 'M A MAN , AND PLEASE ENJOY MY FUCKING FANFICTION ALREADY !

GOSH !

JEEZ !

I WISH I WAS IN MICRONESIA AGAIN :(

MY OWN CAREGIVER WOULDN 'T LEAVE ME ALONE :(

I COULD THROW MY SHOE AT HER AND SHE 'LL SHUT UP IMMEDIATELY :)

MY OWN CAREGIVER KNOWS NO MORTALS TO MY LIFE :(

AN ASMR MOUTH SMACKING LOSER SHE IS !

ARE YOU SERIOUS ?

Okay , I 'm sorry for that angry rambling throughout this first ever author 's note here , please enjoy this fanfiction now !

Major thankies for your cooperation .

melly.