Prologue

A/N: Just another idea that came up as I read an older fic of mine, the Legendary Gamer of Kuoh. I mean, what could go wrong, am I right?

Ironically enough, I find myself quite hyped to keep writing this- unlike most of my fics. Maybe it's because I've been binging the manga and anime for the last week. I've also read my share of fanfiction, from the serious stuff to comedic, and even the spicy ones. Anyway, that's the prologue for now- figured I wouldn't extend the chapter much further when I could close it with a cool line.

Thanks for reading.


Prologue

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor do I own the Gamer Manhwa or any of the series/anime/movies/comics/games/books cited. I just own this satirical and kind of funny fanfic.

"Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing."-Vince Lombardi.


[5:30 AM]

GOOD MORNING, GAMER!

During your sleep, your Health and Chakra pools have been replenished. All ailments have been removed and healed!


How do I even begin to explain this mess? Might as well start by introducing myself.

The name is Hayato, Hyūga Hayato (Kanji:日向勇人- Hyūga Hayato), and I am- or at least used to be- just your typical Konoha Genin; no, not one of the lucky few in a four-man team with a Jonin sensei, but one of the suckers at the Genin Corps, the fuckups who were dropped by their teachers after failing to meet said Jonin's standards. I'm 14 years old, my interests are nothing special, I like playing Shogi, good food and reading, and dislike those entitled Main House jerks from my clan. I particularly hate the asshole who dropped me and my other teammates on our very first day as Genin.

My most noticeable features are the featureless, pale eyes of the Hyuga, and the slightly reddish tint of my otherwise brown hair. That aside, there's nothing particularly interesting about my lazy self. Or at least that used to be the case, till' about a week ago.


'It was supposed to be an easy courier job, how did I even get involved in this mess?!' I all but scream out loud in frustration, as fucking Armageddon rains down from the sky onto the Hidden Stone Village. Activating my Byakugan, I lock my gaze onto the Mad Bomber in the skies, my muscles tensing as I prepare to dodge another volley- with none other than the Third Tsuchikage's granddaughter on my shoulder!

Getting to Iwagakure was easy enough. Having been a Genin for two years now, most of the missions I took were courier jobs- C-Rank missions that paid rather well, and were relatively safe. The Byakugan helps a lot during those, as it's much easier to avoid danger when you can spot it several hundreds of feet away.

That aside, the Land of Earth (Kanji: 土の国, Tsuchi no Kuni) is mostly a dry, desolate wasteland- with vast mountain ranges stretching as far as the eye can see. The cold, northern wind passes through those rocky valleys carrying with it tiny rocks all the way South to the surrounding countries. According to the local villagers, this rather famous natural phenomenon is known as the "Rock Rain".

The trip itself was rather uneventful- since I'm used to these kinds of jobs and wasn't trying to hide from Iwa patrols, I took the usual route through the Land of Grass, making a brief stop at Kusa to resupply before continuing on my merry way. In my bag was a package for the Tsuchikage, nothing too special, only a few documents and scrolls regarding one business deal or the other. Either way, crossing over to the Land of Earth was a bit more complicated- as while Kusa could barely afford a couple Jonin, Iwa was one of the Great Shinobi Villages, and had organized patrols and strict border controls. Once my credentials were checked, though, the rest of the trip was a breeze.

The only incident I cared to record, was when I was crossing the Kannabi Bridge and passed by those two weirdos- dressed in black robes, with blood-red clouds etched upon them. I should have known better, I really fucking should.

Once I got to the Hidden Stone, I delivered my package and received a hefty bonus from the client for the early delivery. Being a lazy ass, I'd asked for permission to stay the night and leave the next morning- my legs were cramped from the running, and I could use a good soak for a change. There I was, chilling at a local restaurant, having a taste of Iwa's extra spicy Ramen, when my eyes catch this kid following me.

'Civilian? No, trying too hard to hide. Not a Chuunin either.' I muse, slurping in the noodles. 'Just your run of the mill Genin, then. And a sloppy one to boot.'

It couldn't be more obvious, really. The girl just hid behind a corner, staring right at me. Maybe I was being a bit too harsh, though, there weren't many people who could sneak up on a Hyuga- even a barely trained one like me.

'Hmm...let's see.' Getting up from the table, I leave a couple Ryo to pay the bill. I then walk out into the bathroom, activating the Byakugan before masking it with a basic Henge, then walking out into the streets.

We play this game of cat and mouse for about an hour. I take a stroll around Iwa, having my fill of the local cuisine, in particular the famed Iwa Mochi. Those rice cakes are really crispy. Anyway, it usually goes like this- girl follows me around; I walk into a building or stall, she stops and hides; I move, and she starts shadowing me again. A few times, I tried to prank her by sneaking off through the back of a store, or using a Henge, but she was like a bloodhound on my trail, and always ended up finding me. At some point, I decided I'd had enough and set up a little ambush.

Spotting a dark, empty alleyway, I casually walk in as if to take a leak. Then using the stealth skills I'd build traveling around as a glorified mailman, I blend into the shadows and climb up to the rooftop, channeling chakra into my feet much like the Tree Walk exercise. There, I wait; and wait; and wait, until she finally bites.

"You know, it's kinda rude to follow a guy around..." I lazily state, chewing on a dango while leaning on my back against the exit- right behind my would-be stalker. "And here I was, thinking I could just relax for a bit..."

Kind of hypocritical of my part, really. Since any foreign shinobi in Konoha could expect the same treatment. Anyway...

"How did you know?" the Iwa Genin replies with a rather cute pout, glaring daggers at me. She's about my age, or a bit younger I guess, and kind of pretty- short black hair and dark eyes, dressed in a red uniform with the village's hitai-ate on her forehead.

"Your stealth is kind of sloppy, sides'" I activate my Byakugan, and immediately notice how she tenses up. I can see she's nervous, with how chaotic her chakra flows through her tenketsu. "Not much goes unseen by these eyes."

"The Byakugan...you're a Hyuga, then. From the Hidden Leaf." She almost spat out. If her dislike for Konoha wasn't clear before, now it was pretty damn obvious. Then again, not long ago, both our villages were at open war with one another. At least until the Fourth Hokage (the Man, the Myth, the Legend) painted the Land of Grass red with the blood of Iwa shinobi, killing one thousand in a single battle and forcing the Tsuchikage to surrender like a little bitch. This feat was so epic, we even learned about it in our school books at the academy.

And he wasn't even the Hokage at the time. Fuckin' Yellow Flash, the man really was something else. That aside, that's why I took off my Hitai-ate while taking my stroll through town- that'd be an open invitation for a stabbing.

"Surprise the fame reaches this far." I rebuke, turning off my dojutsu with a long sigh. Trying my best to sound amicable, I start. "Anyway, the name's Hayato, from clan Hyuga. I'm a courier from the Hidden Leaf. Pleasure to make your acquaintance."

I reach out with my hand for the usual handshake, but the girl just stares right back at me. Her expression is unreadable for the moment, before she slaps it off and replies.

"I'm Kurotsuchi." She answers with a proud huff. "And the pleasure's all yours, Leaf underling."

What a beautiful way to start a friendship.


Turns out, the old geezer that was the Tsuchikage had some mail of his own for Konoha's grandpa Sarutobi. So, my stay at the Hidden Stone was extended for a few days, as documents were revised by the Council, messages were packed and deals were brokered. Apparently, that trade deal was a tad bit more important than I initially guessed, and as such, my payment had also been increased.

In the meantime, there was fuckall for me to do, so I took to eating, slacking off and, most importantly, pestering my new 'friend'.

"Why are you even here?" Kurotsuchi asks with a clenched fist, irritation clear in her tone as she glares at me. So cute. "Don't you have anything better to do? Why don't you fuck off back to Konoha and leave me alone, you stupid Leaf courier?!"

"Because your boss wants something delivered to the Hokage, and I just so happen to be here." I reply, taking a bite from the sweet, delicious Takoyaki I'd just bought. "Ya know, for the Honored Daughter of a village, you sure do swear a lot. Geez, I'd met Wave sailors better mannered..."

That earned me a kunai tossed my way, which grazed my hair as I ducked under it with a laugh.

Turns out, the Genin that had been shadowing me was a big shot at the Hidden Stone- she sort of reminded me of that brat, Konohamaru, in a certain way. Kurotsuchi was the Tsuchikage's granddaughter, and as such, had great expectations placed upon her from a very young age- admittedly, she was a bit childish and had the temper of a red-hot habanero, but could be surprisingly easygoing once I stopped pushing her buttons for a bit. And I have no shame in admitting she's quite talented too, right on par with the clan prodigies back home- at thirteen years of age, she could use two Nature transformations- being quite adept at the use of Earth Release (土遁, Doton) while also taking the first steps in Fire Release (土遁, Doton).

'Put to shame by a kid fresh from the academy, way to go Hayato.' I muse with a sigh. Then again, she is the granddaughter of a Kage, while I'm just a nobody from the Hyuga Branch House- as so kindly expressed by my would-be sensei. I brush off the thought, lying down under the shade of a tree while watching the girl go through the Katas of basic taijutsu. 'I would offer a spar but, I'm not sure her babysitters would take it well...'

There was no way they'd leave the Tsuchikage's granddaughter alone with him, not with a foreign ninja from Konoha. At times, he would catch a glimpse of their chakra with the Byakugan- the Iwa Anbu that had been following him since he first set foot at their village. That happened very rarely, though, their skill in stealth being such even the Byakugan couldn't catch them.

"You know, you're not what I expected from a Hyuga." Kurotsuchi comments snidely, while kicking the air in front of her with gracious precision. "From what I heard, your clan are masters in Taijutsu, yet all I've seen you do is laze around and eat."

"Not like there's much to do here anyway." I reply with a lazy yawn. "Sides', I need to save energy for the road. It's a long way back to Konoha"

Not to mention, practicing even the basics of the Gentle Fist in what basically amounts to enemy territory would give unnecessary insight into our fighting style to way too many of the wrong people. They wouldn't learn much from me- admittedly- I'm not much better than Lady Hinata of all people, but still, it's all about the principle.

"Sounds like a lame excuse. Tell you what, why don't we go for a few rounds- I want to see how well Konoha trains their delivery boys." She says with a cocky grin, before getting into a fighting position. For a moment, I consider humoring her- if only to see how I'd fare against Iwa's golden child.

Then, the bombs start falling- and all Hell breaks loose.


The last thing I saw were the slanted blue eyes of the Mad Bomber, before a blast buried us both under a pile of rubble, putting me in a coma. Wait...no, his name wasn't that- his true name was Deidara, a teen not much older than myself, and when he chose to don the black and red cloak of the Akatsuki, he decided to leave his home village a parting gift.

How do I know all of this, you might ask? To put it simply, I awoke, and then I became aware. If it still sounds awfully vague, I can elaborate a bit further.

I should be fucking dead. There was no way I could have survived, not when my body was hit by an explosion at point-blank range- I'd felt the pain, the burning, and then finally, the cold, gentle embrace of death. And it was then, that I remembered. I remembered things I was never supposed to know.

Glimpses of a past life, a past life where this world- all of it- was artificial, where all of this came from the imagination of an artist. A past life where Naruto was a fucking anime. More of these memories came, of a Princess and the Eye of the Moon, of the Sage of Six Paths and the Nine Tailed-Beasts, of the First Hokage and Madara Uchiha, of the Akatsuki and Pain, and most importantly, of Naruto Uzumaki and Sasuke Uchiha. I'd seen it all, and when I woke up, I was no longer Hayato Hyuga, the Genin.

The name is Hayato Hyuga, and I am the Gamer.

Over, out.


A/N: That's it for the prelude. Kind of liked it, actually. Thanks for reading.

Wildfurion