I stared at Baghra, my mind and emotions churning. "No," I whispered at last.
"No?" She replied sharply. "What do you mean, no?"
"I'm not leaving."
"Foolish girl! Have you heard nothing I've just said? He'll make you his slave and use your power to…"
"I understand," I cut her off. "But if what you say is true, it will do me no good to run. He'll never stop chasing me. He'll pursue me to the ends of the Earth."
"So you're just going to give in?" She hissed.
"I didn't say that!"
She barked a humorless laugh. "You're not powerful enough to stop him, girl."
"No, I'm not, but…"
"So you're going to change him with your love?" She spat the last three words at me with venomous disgust.
"Of course not!" I snapped.
"Well, at least you aren't stupid enough to believe that is possible. Then what is your plan, girl?"
"I don't know exactly, but I won't run and I won't give in."
She stared at me for a long moment. "You're a fool."
I shrugged. "Maybe, but can you honestly say there is any real chance of me evading him?"
She sighed and seemed to shrink in on herself. "No, there is none at all."
I took one of her hands in mine. "Baghra, if I stay, if you help me, I will do everything in my power to keep him from setting himself beyond redemption. I cannot promise to succeed, but I promise to try."
Baghra nodded. "Fools together then."
I returned to my room and paced the floor trying to make sense of my jumbled thoughts. I was so absorbed that I almost didn't hear the light knock on my door. My heart jumped into my throat. I went to the door and opened it slowly. The Darkling stood there looking as beautiful as ever.
"Alina, I know you didn't have a chance to answer me, but…"
I moved to the side. "Come in."
He stepped into my room and I closed and locked the door. The Darkling studied me carefully for a few moments. "Are you certain?"
I wasn't certain of anything at the moment, but I knew that if this ruse was to work I would have to behave as if nothing was wrong. He wanted me and maybe I could use that to my advantage. "I…I'm not sure I'm ready for…for everything, but I'd like you to come in." I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks.
He smiled. "Of course." He closed the short distance between us, taking me in his arms. There it was again, that feeling of surety and I realized that even after everything Baghra had told me I still wanted him, too.
"Alina, you've never been with a man before have you?" I shook my head and couldn't help but notice the look of satisfaction that crossed his face. "I'll wait as long as it takes for you to be ready."
One hand was tight on my waist, the other was at the nape of my neck and his mouth was everywhere. On my shoulder, my neck, my jaw. My eyes fluttered closed. Then I felt his warm breath in my ear as he murmured, "Aleksander."
My eyes snapped open. "What?"
He chuckled quietly at my confusion. "My name is Aleksander, and you should probably know it. Say it."
"Aleksander," I breathed.
He shuddered and for some reason it made me feel bolder. I began feathering my own kisses up his neck to his ear and whispered, "Aleksander."
Both his hands went to my waist and he gripped me firmly. Fear suddenly flooded me and I put a hand on his chest, pushing him away slightly. "Will you be able to stop? Will you be able to control yourself if…"
He silenced me with a finger on my lips. "Predatory men claim they cannot control themselves in order to take what has not been offered. Men who feel entitled to a woman's time, her body. I have waited for you a long time, Alina. I can wait until you are ready. I can kiss you, caress you, hold you in my arms, lay beside you every night, and never take more than you are ready to give."
It was almost enough to make me wonder if maybe Baghra was crazy after all. He led me to the bed and we sat side by side, his arm around my waist. "You want to stay with me? Every night?"
"If you'll permit me."
"Why? Why me?"
He stared at me and seemed to be considering his answer with care. At last he replied slowly, "Alina…you know that Grisha lead long lives… but you and I are unique. We will live thousands of years, perhaps forever. We will not age."
Everyone I care for, everyone I know, will age and die and I will remain. The horror I felt must have shown on my face because he sighed and held me tighter. "I debated whether or not to tell you yet. I'm sorry to lay one more burden on your shoulders. I hope that in time you may learn to see it as a gift."
A new realization hit me. "That's why you say you've waited for me a long time; not just to destroy the Fold, but…" I trailed off, not knowing exactly how to finish.
"Yes. For someone I would not have to watch wither and die."
I felt his loneliness then through the connection between us. I couldn't help myself, I reached for his free hand and squeezed it. We sat in silence for a few minutes, his arm still around me.
"What news of the stag?"
"The trackers are close. We will set out soon to join them in the hunt."
"Me, too?"
He smiled. "Of course, Alina. You must be there when we locate it."
I looked away from him. "Will Mal be with us?"
"The tracker from Keramzin?"
I nodded.
"Yes. Alina," he took my chin and gently turned my face back to him, "what is between the two of you?"
"We grew up together. He was my closest friend."
"Are you in love with him?"
"I…I thought I was."
"You thought? And now?"
I shifted uncomfortably. "Now, I'm not sure." I felt tears welling in my eyes. "And I suppose if what you say about my lifespan is true, it doesn't matter anyway."
"Of course it matters." He brushed my tears away. "If it matters to you, it matters."
I stared down at my shoes. "I saw him tonight as he was leaving. We…had a fight. He said…well, he said a lot of horrible things."
He turned my face back up to his again and my breath caught at the malice glittering in his gray eyes. "What did he say to you, Alina?" His voice was low and menacing.
"It…it doesn't matter," I gasped. "I said some horrible things as well. I should apologize to him."
"If he hurt you, it matters a great deal to me."
My own temper flared. "It's none of your concern! It's between Mal and me!"
His eyes flashed with fury and I flinched. His anger was instantly gone. "You're right. I'm sorry, Alina."
"When do we leave?" I asked, anxious to change the subject.
"Tomorrow if possible, the day after at the latest."
"On horseback?" I tried to hide my gloom at the thought.
"You and I will ride in my coach."
"Won't that slow us down?"
"A bit," he shrugged, "but it will be worth it. I remember how miserable you were on the trip here from Kribirsk."
I couldn't help my grin. "It was awful."
"I confess I also want privacy and more time alone with you."
"So Ivan won't be riding with us?"
"He'll be on horseback."
"Such a shame. How shall I bear the deprivation of his cheerful company?"
Aleksander laughed. "I'm sure you'll manage." He cupped my cheek. "May I stay with you tonight, Alina?"
I was going to be alone with him in a coach for the Saints knew how long, so what could it hurt? "Yes, Aleksander."
A/N: This story is based on the books and will contain spoilers for all three. I assume there will also be spoilers for future seasons of the show. If you have not finished the books or are only watching the show, proceed with caution. I will update this weekend and then weekly.
