I can't quite remember why I didn't post this even though my brain is screaming at me not to post this… Guess I'll post it because I just want to?


"Would you die for me?"

Simple words yet ones that had heralded the deaths of many of Issei's versions across many other worlds.

The red spear of light made its way to the brown-haired teen's body, his body frozen in a strange mix of fear at the prospect of death and lust at having seen a pair of breasts in real life up close.

Unlike many times before in other dimensions, however, the spear did not make it to its destination. This Issei would not die here tonight, nor would he become a devil.

"Impossible!" The Fallen Angel stared in shock at her stopped spear.

It had been stopped by a single hand.

"If I had a bowl of ramen for each time I heard that word, I think I would finally actually be satisfied with how much ramen I'd have." The spear buzzed in his hand as it tried to make it to Issei but failed. It didn't harm him simply by touch because of him simply being something the energy of the spear was not designed to hurt.

Gripping it ever so slightly harder, making sure not to break it as stuff tended to generally be weaker than him, the unknown person shifted his grip on it until he held it by its pointed edge, and then slammed the other end of the spear into Raynare's face, the impact sending her flying away in a way the many main species of the Biblical Faction—comprised of the Devil and Fallen Angels as well to other, outside factions—were not meant to fly.

"Kid, I think you should make your way out of here now." Issei stared, confused, at what appeared to be a guy his age. 'Did he just call me kid?'

"But Yūma!" Despite the attempt on his life, the brown-haired pervert was still quite attached to his (Ex) girlfriend, apparently.

The man in front of Issei turned around to face him. "Man, I didn't want to have to do this," the man sighed, putting Issei on guard.

"What are you going to do?" Issei warily asked, not noticing the guy signalling at someone behind him to do something.

It was silent for a moment, the silence being so incredibly tense for Issei. For Naruto? He was just watching his clone lazily do its task behind Issei while he tried to keep Issei from noticing the clone.

Noticing it had finally done its job, Naruto finally moved, pointing behind Issei and exaggeratedly said, "Oh! Is that what I think it is!?" Prompting Issei to turn around and leave his back completely unguarded in Naruto's direction, almost making the blond contemplate using a certain 1,000 Years of Death technique on the guy.

"I think it's—"

"OH MY GOD, IS THAT THE LIMITED ADDITION TORIKIME EXTRA SCENE DVDS THAT WERE NEVER SHOWN TO THE PUBLIC!?" Sure enough, a trail of such lewd DVDs went all the way to the outside of the park.

Naruto sweat-dropped at just how enthusiastically the guy had interrupted him.

And he just watched with a deadpan face as Issei, without even taking a second to contemplate his actions, ran out of the park, following the DVD trail as he picked each one up.

Age had taught him how to deal with many kinds of people.

And yet... age never taught him how to skip the 3 minutes it took to boil some instant ramen to eat.

Well... there was a way but it came with its own problems.

Naruto stared solemnly at nothing as he contemplated his ramen-ly problems.

"You..." Ah, yes, he knew he was forgetting something. "How dare a filthy creature lay a hand on a superior creature like me!?"

Turning around, he was treated to the sight of a Fallen Angel with a very bruised face, struggling to stand as she made use of a newly-created spear and her wings to stand, clearly not yet having recovered from the blow he had dealt to her.

Considering how weak the blow was, Naruto was sure she'd be fine...ish in a few minutes.

Also, he just realized what she said. "Woah, now, lady. I hit you with your own spear, I never once laid a hand on you!" He pointed at her exaggeratedly.

If possible, this seemed to make her bruised and ugly—ugly because of the bruise and scowl, really—looking face twist into something even worse as she believed this blond, random man was mocking her.

While INCREDIBLY angry, she also knew she needed a few more minutes before she could stand without having to use a light spear as a cane and her wings to balance herself. A few minutes until she could somewhat fight, so if the man was content with letting her recover, then she'd take advantage of that. She'd recover and make him RUE the second he thought of even coming to the same CONTINENT AS HER! She'd have him lick her feet and—and one of her reasons for falling was acting up again...

Naruto simply stared at her, noting in her body language just how confident and angry she was in her situation.

'... Pride? Maybe wrath?'

A blush slowly grew on her face. 'And of-fucking-course lust. Because what damn Fallen Angel hasn't fallen because of that at this point?'

But that also didn't make sense when it came to his guesses for why she fell. Perhaps a mix of pride, lust, and wrath?

Considering how messed up she seemed, it seemed likely.

Raynare, on her end, decided to take note of her opponent's features for the first time as she finally managed to calm down enough for that act.

Blond, too much orange, and too flashy. He seemed to be a collection of qualities she either wasn't into, or was indifferent of. Her lust quickly stopped acting up, replaced by disgust as she noted just how much orange he wore.

THIS was what managed to actually hit her? What a joke.

It must have been a— "Fluke?"

'What?' She stared at her opponent, only just noticing the 3 symmetrical lines on both sides of his face. 'Did he just—'

"Complete my thought but out loud?"

He had.

"Now, I am sure you are wondering just how I did tha—woah!" He dodged the spear that she was previously using as a cane.

"Stay out of my head, mind reader!"

Damn it, acting like the smart, stronger antagonist never worked well for him. Why did he keep trying over the ages?

'Madara and Itachi had drip for ages, though,' his subconscious helpfully reminded him.

Ah, yes, he could only wish to achieve even a fraction of that drip. He occasionally tried to make personas to try and see if he could achieve that.

Turns out, this attempt just got him being thought of as a mind rapist or something. Wasn't his fault she was so predictable.

Guess he would have to take this seriously, then.

Raynare suddenly felt something from her very core telling her to run. To escape. She had never felt anything like this before.

She watched as he slowly moved towards her, her body being too paralyzed to do anything about it.

Their eyes locked.

"You know, I was once like you as well, I have felt your pain and…"

She screamed internally as his speech started.


(30 Minutes Later)

Rias Gremory appeared via a magic circle, having had to manually activate it as Issei's desires had not been strong enough to begin summoning her, apparently. If he couldn't summon her while dying, then she'd have to 'save' him herself by reincarnating his corpse into a devil. Hopefully, then she could use his devotion to her and his lust for her body and perhaps give him hope of his dreams being plausible, and he could become a devil strong enough to help her. And if his Sacred Gear was what she thought it was, then Ajuka's replacement for it would be quite nice.

She was there for only a second and, already, she could tell things were wrong. Issei hadn't failed to summon her because of his lack of strong desires; he failed to summon her because he didn't even appear to have his pamphlet! It had been stuck to the ground with…. Wait, was that a kunai?

Her fangirl-ing was barely stopped by the fact that she JUST noticed the PURE angel in the area.

Not a Fallen Angel, but a regular one. Pure white wings and all… except her clothes seemed more akin to that of a Fallen's?

This made no sense. All her information told her there were only Fallen Angels here!

Already, she could feel a headache beginning to form. Or that was just the pure light magic of the angel coming into effect.


(Naruto)

"Talk no Jutsu was a success." He grinned.

That grin nearly instantly turned into a frown as he realized he once more did something that would probably make the higher-ups of the Grigori view him as a threat.

Meh, not his problem.

He was somewhat aware of how his thought process didn't make sense there but he wasn't quite sure if he cared.


(Issei)

It had taken a few days of 'watching' the DVDs once he had run the entire way home after collecting them all, barging into his own room with an aura of perversity so strong that his parents knew to leave him alone for a few days, but he had finally finished them all. He had also finally "finished".

And then he remembered the girlfriend he had left behind, conveniently ignoring her assassination attempt on him, and had made to go back to the park as if Yūma would still be there; albeit, he made his way there slowly as "finishing" the DVDs had taken much out of him.

In fact, it almost felt like something in one of his arms was whimpering or something. Issei was sure he was imagining it.

It was in the middle of all this that he had come across a stranger after he finally made his way to the park.

"Well, this really is unfortunate." A man slowly walked out of the shadows that covered most of the park at night. "Me running into you, that is."

He noticed Issei's body shivering and felt how strong the sin of lust was in him. He assumed he was a newly-reincarnated devil. "What's the matter? Are you really so afraid of me that you are trembling that much?"

'Shit, I can't tell him I jacked off so many times the past few days that my whole body feels weak because of it and that's why so many of my limbs are shaking.'

Issei stepped back warily, forgetting there was a fountain behind him, and tripped into it. 6 embarrassing seconds of splashing in the water later, and Issei finally managed to get out of it and prevent his death from drowning in 1-feet deep water. He also didn't notice the water change colour from the absolute filth he still had on his skin and clothes in dried form as he never took a bath since the last time he was in the park.

"That was embarrassing enough to watch that it almost made me want to not bother killing you, stray." In the time Issei had fought the fountain to keep from drowning, the man had gotten much closer to Issei, allowing his human eyes to finally see more of the guy.

The fedora was the first thing to catch his attention; if Issei ever had to be asked to describe the man in front of him in the future, "fedora man" would likely be his first response. He had black hair, which wasn't all that uncommon, and dark blue eyes—which actually was somewhat rarer. Almost everything he wore was a shade of black, which blended in well with the night, making it hard for Issei to see it all with his human eyes. There was a splash of white on the man's ensemble in the form of what appeared to be a white shirt underneath what may have been a black trench coat or something—it was difficult for Issei to see in the dark.

And then he finally saw a flicker of movement behind the man. He struggled, he struggled hard, but eventually his eyes managed to focus on what appeared to be… "Wings?"

His eyes widened as he remembered the last time he saw Yūma. She had wings too!

Oh well, as long as the guy didn't just start having a spear—HE HAD A SPEAR!

Sure enough, a spear of light had formed in the man's hands.

"NO!"

Such was the force and conviction behind his one-word sentence that it actually stopped the "fedora man" in his tracks.

"Excuse me?" The confusion was strong in his tone.

"I am NOT getting penetrated by a man. I drew the line when Yūma was doing it, and this is going too far, man. NO. I am NOT getting penetrated."

The other man's mouth just slowly opened and stayed open in a strange mix of shock, confusion, and an inability to figure out what to say to that.

And then something clicked and his mouth closed. 'Yūma was Raynare's human name from when she'd blend in among them, I believe. So this kid is responsible for her disappearance.'

"So you are the one that took down Raynare."

Issei stepped back at the sudden hostility in the man's tone. "Raynare? Who's that?"

"Don't play games with me. We all haven't been able to feel her corrupted light in days; you must have killed her." He moved very close to Issei, looking down at him in annoyance and mild anger.

The Fallen may not have seemingly cared too much for each other most of the time, but when the cause of the death of one of their kind was from an outside race, it suddenly became an issue. Dohnaseek could not say he was ever fond of Raynare, but he never wished death upon her. Mostly because the Grigori really needed to keep their numbers up.

"I suppose I should tell you the name of your killer before your life ends. My name is Dohna—what am I smelling?"

"Your name is Dohna-what-am-I-smelling?" Issei knew foreigners had weird names but this seemed to be pushing even that. Also, what did he mean by "the name of his killer"!?

Taking another whiff, the man quickly backtracked from Issei. He knew that smell.

Semen. The kid smelled strongly enough of it even AFTER he fell in the fountain earlier, that the fallen angel was feeling seriously creeped out by him. Also disgusted. Probably more disgusted than creeped out.

Chancing a look at the fountain the kid had fallen in, he realized that fountain probably had enough sperm in it now to even get devil women pregnant if they got that inside them. No wonder the devils had their eye on the kid—or whatever reason it was that Raynare had told him, he wasn't quite listening—because he could probably singlehandedly bring up their population if he became a devil and got some female consorts.

Dohnaseek suddenly found himself in a conundrum; should he kill the kid and risk getting some of that disgusting, dried—wet because of the fountain—stuff on him, or let him live, only to be recruited by the devils to fix their population.

He could just kill him with a spear from afar but… 'I don't even want my spears touching stuff like this…'

Issei, noticing his opponent's hold on his spear changing, quickly yelled, "I told you, I ain't into that stuff! That's gay! And not the kind of gay I am into!"

Hearing this, Dohnaseek suddenly had an epiphany. "Listen, kid, I think we both don't want this spear or me touching you. So just stay there and I'll come back after buying a gun."

Issei, being the dumbass he is, replied with a, "Pffft. Nice one."

"What?"

"You know, with how strict gun laws here are, it was a funny joke how you mentioned you'd just 'buy a gun'."

Ah, right. That.

He could just steal a gun, but as an angel of war, this felt wrong and against his nature even though he had since become a fallen angel.

Oh wait! He knew of a place—nay, an entire series of black markets, that could provide for his needs.

He started running out of the park, only yelling a three-word sentence at Issei as he halfway made his way out. "Stay right there!"

Issei actually would not have listened to the guy, if not for his legs finally collapsing under him as his DAYS-long masturbation session finally took its toll on him.

As he lay on the ground, panting from exhaustion, dehydration, and hunger, he took the time to look around as that was all he could do.

Unexpectedly, he did see something of worth.

On the bench he and Yuma had sat upon a few days back in the park, was a man. He wore a lot of orange. Like, way too much. Issei was only fine with that much orange on a hot girl, and that was because he was way too busy looking at the girl to notice the orange.

How long had he been there for? No way had Issei not noticed him for so long if he was there the entire time.

Next to the man seemed to be stacks of plastic cups of something as he noisily slurped on something.

Issei had to reiterate in his own mind: There was NO way he had been there the whole time.

Something about the guy rang some bells in his mind, but he wasn't quite sure what. And, with the darkness of the night and the distance between him and the man, he had some difficulty seeing his face.

'Wait. That orange… It's the same guy that was there when Yūma transfo—showed her boobs!' Issei knew he had to make sure it was him. He wasn't quite up to the task of yelling or moving his arms and legs; his neck and head would have to do.

With a grunt of effort, his chin met the ground and he began pulling himself with it like the many amazing hentai protagonists he had seen.

Well, at least it was supposed to go like that. Turns out, it's pretty difficult to find some purchase on a concrete floor to pull his body with. Also, it turns out that it hurt his chin like a bitch when he tried to pull his body by trying to dig his chin into the ground and pulling down on it.

"Woah, there, kid. No need to try and pull what I pulled with Gaara."

That voice. He knew that voice.

Looking up, he was greeted with the face of the same guy he met the day Yūma and he were in this park. He had somehow made his way over to Issei without him noticing, which probably wasn't all that difficult, considering he was busy internally bitching about the pain in his neck. It was, however, made slightly impressive because of all the orange the man wore; it just didn't seem feasible for him to move around without grabbing the attention of everyone in sight.

The man just made slurping sounds as he ate what Issei now knew to be ramen from an instant ramen cup. Which was worrying because if all the cups on the bench were actually eaten, then Issei wasn't quite sure how long this guy was going to live for, with that much unhealthy stuff in his body.

"Not going to say anything?" the man questioned in-between slurps. "Well, I guess I'll take this as my moment to monologue."

"How—"

"Up-up-up." The guy held two fingers at his own lips, clearly gesturing for Issei to be quiet. "You didn't take your chance to talk, so now I get to monologue."

Before Issei's bewildered eyes, the park lights in the area darkened and changed colour to purple. "There I was on my quest to stop all the damn wars that are always about to start when something told me to come to this park some days back. So I followed my protagonist-sense—I totally didn't rip off Spider-Man with that name—and came here. Sure enough, all I had to do was stand there like the protagonist I am, and I saw you and that assassin appear, and then I dealt with her, and then I just spent the next few days eating ramen here because my protagonist-sense told me to stay here."

The man quickly took a breath after saying all of that in one go. "You got all of that?"

When he looked at Issei, he was greeted with a pale face. Either the kid had all of his blood going to a boner, or he was scared.

"You… 'dealt' with Yūma?"

"Oh yeah, I even helped her go to heaven," he offhandedly said, seemingly completely unaware of the negative connotations behind his words. "Bet she's pretty happy to finally be with her father or creator, or whatever he is to her, again."

The human on the floor stilled as he processed the fact that his girlfriend—still conveniently ignoring the assassination attempt on him by her—had been killed by the guy in front of him.

"Murderer!"

To his credit, it didn't take long for a look of realization to appear on his face. "Ah… Comedic bad thing that happens to a main character. Screw you, Fate."

Murder in his eyes, Issei suddenly found the strength to get up. He was in Naruto's face within a second.

Unluckily for him, not even Naruto wanted to touch him post-masturbation session but pre-bath time. Naruto easily avoided the fist to his face, the downward blow that was supposed to hit his shoulder, and a simple two steps back let him stay out of range of Issei's kick, the result of which unbalanced him and, without Naruto needing to assist in it, caused him to fall backwards.

Naruto knew the guy wouldn't listen to him in his blind rage but figured he would make an attempt anyway. "Look, liste—"

"Raaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!" Ducking quickly to avoid Issei's lunge after he got up from falling in an embarrassing manner, Naruto realized something odd about the kid.

One of his hands was glowing.

Now, even though he had lived on this planet for a few hundred years now—a thought that still hurt him—he still hadn't figured out how to sense Sacred Gear wielders in his base form. The form that did allow him to sense them could not be casually used, unfortunately.

The occasional con came with its pros, however. The same thing that seemed to prevent him from sensing these things also stopped every other species from sensing his chakra. Naruto often got his jollies from watching some nature energy-inclined yōkai losing their shit as they could sense something going on with nature energy when he was absorbing it, but they would then completely lose track of what happened to it once he mixed it with his chakra. He made sure to SPECIFICALLY remember to go to Kyoto and other such areas at least ONCE a decade because of it. He wouldn't do it too often, lest they get used to it; he tried to keep it unpredictable.

He was sure that would come back to bite him in the ass one of these centuries, but he'd deal with it when that would happen.

The kid didn't seem to notice his glowing hand, in his enraged state, and simply ran towards Naruto once more.

'Will his desire for revenge actually be enough to manifest it?' It had been a while since he had personally seen a human manifest a Sacred Gear for their first time naturally, instead of being taught workarounds that were often being patched by 'God'. Ever since the days of the Great War had ended, humans were targeted far less for having Sacred Gears, thus allowing them to live a safer life which often also led to their desires never being strong enough to manifest their Sacred Gears for the first time. The less they knew about the supernatural, the less they'd believe in them having some power that could help them.

There were many factors involved, and humans just didn't have as many factors to push them anymore.

In this case, rage and the wish for power would be especially helpful if his Sacred Gear was a combat-based one. If not, then Naruto really didn't expect the current level of Issei's desires to actually manifest his Sacred Gear. Too bad he couldn't sense negative emotions anymore, or else he wouldn't have to guess whether his rage was enough or not. Granted, that still wouldn't help him if someone was using positive desires instead of negative ones to manifest their Sacred Gear. Or whenever 'God' decided to tweak the system. He was annoying like that.

His body avoided Issei's attacks for him as his mind pondered over Sacred Gears.

"Stand still!" Unfortunately, Naruto wouldn't hear that due to him phasing out while thinking.

Issei simply grew more enraged as the orange-clad guy did not, in fact, listen to his 'polite' request.

Naruto watched as his hand glowed but nothing more happened. He was on the precipice of manifesting it. If Naruto taunted him some more, he could likely assist in its manifestation, but he wasn't cruel enough to go along with the kid's belief that his 'girlfriend' was dead just so the kid could finally manifest his Sacred Gear.

As a glowing fist came near his face, Naruto avoided it while raising a hand to lightly touch the glowing edges that were clearly separate from the kid's arm. 'Solid.'

So it had formed enough that it was touchable.

Deciding to get some space, he threw a fist at the kid's stomach, making sure not to touch him, not that the lack of physical contact seemed to matter in the end as the brown-haired guy was sent flying a few feet back simply from the force exerted by the displaced air from his fist.

To Issei's credit, this only had him down for only a few moments before he was up and running at Naruto while gasping for breath.

"This is for Yūma!" Issei, still not noticing the BLATANTLY glowing arm, threw a fist.

Boost!

Naruto's entire aura changed at that moment. The Boosted Gear was one he had been on the search for, for quite some time. He prepared to grab the kid from the Boosted Gear-covered arm, it being the one part of him that he knew was not absolutely filthy, except he soon found out he did not have to do any such thing.

Issei, already tired from his activities from the past few days along with his lack of sleep, water, and food, was already at his limits when he started attacking Naruto, only adrenaline keeping him standing. A Sacred Gear's activation normally boosted a human's energy—emphasis on the word "normally"—but the Boosted Gear was anything but normal. Special, even among the Longinus when it came to its first manifestation, the activation of the first boost was all it took for all his stamina to go down the drain.

He was down before he made it to Naruto, his Boosted Gear beginning to disappear along with his consciousness. "Oh no you don't!"

A piece of paper was slammed into the gauntlet, a line of words in some unknown language streaming out of it until it covered the gauntlet, forcing it to stay in the physical realm.

It was always so much more difficult for him to deal with Sacred Gears when they weren't manifested. Granted, he had no idea when he came here a few days back that he'd come across one that was on his list of one's to find, but that's why he listened to his "protagonist-sense". It always seemed to lead him to where all the action was, even if it also meant he was often blamed for things simply because he was there when it happened.

"Now, how to deal with you," he muttered as he crouched near the brunette's form.

Reaching out with his chakra, he grimaced as nothing happened. Almost nothing in this world ever reacted to chakra. Everything treated it like an outsider of sorts. So much for an energy that "connects" things, he supposed. Even nature energy resisted here, only his expert knowledge in it from his younger days helped him to force a connection.

Suddenly, he heard hurried footsteps. He got up and turned around just in time to see a heavily sweating fallen angel appear, his wings drooping, and his body/clothes having as many firearms as the man could place in/on them, apparently. Wherever he had come from, it had clearly been far away enough to tire him while flying.

The man seemed annoyed upon seeing him, Naruto's trained ears even hearing him mutter, "I told the devil to stay here. My fault for believing a stray would do what its told to do."

Clearly his journey had tired him immensely if he couldn't see Issei's form on the ground right next to Naruto's feet.

Wondering if he should help, Naruto decided to raise an arm, the action instantly getting the man on guard. "Who are you and when did you get here? Also, did you see some brown-haired kid around here when you came here?"

Staring blanking at the immensely fatigued Fallen that still didn't seem to be seeing the other human right next to him on the ground, Naruto pondered on the idea of pranking the man by giving him an incorrect direction for where the kid had gone. Alas, he chose not to.

Slowly, the arm that he raised went down, the act attracting the fallen angel's eyes as they followed his hand as it slowly lowered until it stopped with one finger pointing at Issei's form on the ground, Naruto's face having a deadpan on it while doing the act.

Dohnaseek, upon seeing the stray devil on the floor, tried to see if his eyes could see any visible chest movements to indicate it was alive. Upon seeing so, he let out a victorious smile and completely forgot about the guy in way too much orange standing there. "Die, devil-scum!"

And he unloaded whatever firearms he was holding, not hearing Naruto's exclamation of " Water Style: Water Wall."

The questionable mix of water and other stuff from the fountain followed his verbal command, coming together to form a thick wall as high as his height was and as wide as two of him, needing additional chakra to be used for him to spit out more water to help provide enough water for it.

And so Naruto waited.

He waited long. He waited and waited, watching as the many bullets pelted his liquid wall and quickly lost all their momentum before they even made their way a quarter of the way through it. He thought it was over when the bullets stopped. He was so wrong.

Without even opening his eyes, Dohnaseek switched guns and, with a fairly impressive showing of skill, blindly aimed RIGHT at where Issei was and began shooting again.

It's not like holding up the water wall was difficult or anything, but this was ridiculous. Especially so, if the fallen angel planned to use every single gun Naruto could see on his person ALONG with the extra magazines.

'A fallen angel using actual guns that aren't enhanced with magic. Now I have seen everything.'

Sighing, he decided he would have to take this seriously.


(Dohnaseek POV)

Ha! Maybe these worthless humans father created aren't so worthless after all.

Killing things with light spears is fun and all, but it all just lacks a certain kick to it. Part of that is probably because my light spears weigh nothing to me, and perhaps it is the same for the rest of my kind.

"Hahahahahahaha!" Someone was laughing. The joy in their voice made me happier.

Oh, was the laughter mine?

I haven't enjoyed killing this much since the days of my youth. I was made to be an angel of battle, mass produced to be sent to be slaughtered in battle, and we all did it happily. Those of us that survived eventually grew more wings.

Some took a different path, however. Whether we grew more wings or not, we suddenly had desires and thoughts develop in us that led to us falling.

My fall hurt in a way I could never quite describe. I believe it's the same for all of us that fell, we all seem broken, trying to claw for something to help complete us with the lack of father's love to provide that completion. Many turned heavily to the sins that ostracized us in the first place.

How stupid… and yet… I can't bring myself to stop! The ceaseless murders of many seem to thrill me in some way that I cannot describe. It's not like I forget about my fall in these moments, oh no, far from it, but it's just that I almost feel some form of true happiness, when indulging in my sins!

I suppose I hold some jealousy of devils from this. Them indulging in sins is expected—glorified, even! But fallen angels? It just denotes us falling further.

But they never got to feel the presence, the love, the glory of God. I would almost say it is an equivalent exchange, except losing all of that hurts enough that it makes nothing about this "equal".

Ah, I noticed the recoil had stopped. Well, time to change magazines again! My fingers twitched in excitement for when they'd get to use the big guns.

It never did occur to me that all I ever heard were the sounds of bullets hitting a liquid. Nothing but liquid.

I still never registered this once I started shooting again moments later, the changing of magazines coming quite naturally to me—most likely one of the few blessings of father I still have from being created an angel of battle; a very good instinctual understanding of how to use weapons.

"Hey." A voice was heard through all the gunfire. This needed to mentioned because this wasn't shouted, just a calm, normal-volume voice, and I heard it through all the gunfire.

Now I didn't watch too many of the shows the humans had been making the past century or so, but even my limited experience there told me that this was a protagonist level thing. Plus, my time fighting in the Great War taught me that clichés held a semblance of truth to them. When God spoke, his voice was heard by all on the field of combat, regardless of how loud it was. But even God's voice sounded like a bellow of a higher existence, something that roared—calmly, somehow, despite that being the opposite of a "roar"—and demanded, quite justly, to be heard.

This was quite unlike that.

It demanded to be heard, yet it did not sound commanding.

So I decided to get the RPGs, and if that failed, then the tank I parked outside after struggling to bring it over from another continent; the cause of why my wings were more tired than the time I joined a competition Azazel set up.

… I should have known not to join, but I was still young, back then. I thought it would be a thing of battle, not a matter of me joining the Mile High Club—a name Azazel made sure to popularize among mortals later when airplanes came around—and trying to… do things. Lust is not my sin, and so it is not one I like to spend my time thinking about.

"You know, I was once like you as well." The voice spoke.

I finally opened my eyes, having closed them earlier from the enjoyment of shooting guns on full-auto.

First thing I saw? 'Water wall.'

An RPG wouldn't work against that. My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined.

Almost instantly, I perked up when I remembered the tank.

Before I could turn around and go for it, someone stepped away from the cover of the water wall. It was the orange guy.

Something about him set me on edge. Something that was missing earlier.

My supernatural eyes saw his face; it was serious. That shouldn't have unsettled me as much as it should have.

And then I watched as it grew emotive at a speed it should not have naturally been possible. What was worse was that the emotions I could suddenly almost FEEL seemed genuine. He really just went from 100% serious to…

"I had those struggles as well." The man in orange seemed nostalgic as he spoke of times that had long since passed by.

"I was called a failure and everyone laughed as I failed in my classes."

"What are you talking about?" I asked in complete confusion.

"I was tasked to become a killer from childhood and yet I persevered against that part of the job description." The blond went on, seemingly unaware of the interruption.

"I was a fucking angel designed to cause death upon my enemies and I thrived and felt immense happiness whenever I succeeded in murdering all I was set to kill."

"My rival beat me in every fight in the beginning."

"Are you listening to me? I murdered infant devils days within being born and I loved it. I really don't think we have anything in common!"

The man stopped talking for a moment, and I hoped that was the end of that.

A finger slowly pointed at me, and I grew weary of an attack. I had seen enough beams of energy or elements being sent by people pointing at each other to know that it was anything but a simple gesture in the supernatural world.

"Then why are you crying?"

What? I wasn't crying, this was ridiculous. I reached a hand to my face and—why was my face wet?

"You know deep down that what I am saying is true."

"You aren't saying anything but nonsense about your past. What is supposed to be "true" here?" I asked incredulously while trying to figure out how he was making me produce tears.

"I sat on a swing for longer than Tenten ever existed."

"Who the fuck is—"

"Alright, that's enough mentioning her. No need to give her anymore second-hand screen time. It's just unnatural at some point."

Something was wrong. I felt weak. Emotionally weak.

I blinked and found myself closer to the floor than before. Physically weak as well?

'His powers must be dependent on speech. I never should have let him talk. It's over for me now.' I watched as he walked closer to me.

"You and I, we are alike."

No we weren't!

"Like hell we are!" My spit didn't quite make it all the way to his face but the message was received.

The man seemed confused at the spit for moment. Perhaps it finally got into his head that he and I had almost nothing in common based on everything he said?

"Weird… It normally works by now." I heard him mutter. "Oh wait, don't I have to punch him first or during the speech or something?"

And then I was hit in the head hard enough to fly completely out of the park. I should have been knocked out instantly.

A miracle kept me conscious, if barely.

As I heard footsteps, I realized something. It wasn't a miracle, at least not for me. This was definitely one of those clichés happening right now. I had to be awake for the last words; how infuriating.

"Why on ramen's name is there a tank parked out here?"

No answer met him. I did not quite feel like answering him nor was I sure I could.

My vision started to darken. "Now, as I was saying, we were the same once. If you choose a brighter path, we can be the same once more. Follow the light, seek redemption."

Those words followed me all the way to unconsciousness, burning themselves into my memory, seemingly hypnotising me with how sure I was about them and how much I suddenly wanted to follow them.


(3rd Person POV maybe…)

"Follow the light, seek redemption."

Naruto watched as the man's wings began to turn white.

"Talk no Jutsu successfully used." Man was it convenient how their wings turned white when he did it to them. It really helped visually help him know it worked.

Now to walk off the embarrassment of forgetting that Talk no Jutsu usually or occasionally did require a blow from Naruto before the enemy started to see sense.

Sakura just said he caused them temporary brain damage and that's what did it. Naruto just thought she was jealous she couldn't cause Sasuke brain damage and cause him to love her more and openly.

Before he could walk back to the unconscious kid in the park, some of the loaded RPGs that flew off the (fallen?) angel's form when he kicked him in the head all decided that now was the time for them all to blow up. How convenient it was, then, for these RPGs that they all fell in such a way that they blew up right in his face as Naruto turned back from the angel—and turned to them—to walk back to the park.

Life so wasn't dattebayo sometimes.


(Omake: One Of the Starting Splashes [Okay, I wrote a whole bunch of stuff some months back and forgot a whole lot of plot. So I'll just post this omake as a summarisation because that stuff sucked.])

Seven heads, seven necks, seven tails.

He felt a shift in Chōmei's gifted chakra at the thought. Agitation.

Ten horns with which it could ram and tear things apart.

And, the thing that made the most sense to Naruto, SIX wings.

The realm shuddered from its presence, the light from the biblical divinity dimmed as it began losing against its foe. The beast spoken of in the apocalypse, the one that was said to be equal to a being he had made a deal with oh-so long ago.

He breathed out in anticipation.

Suddenly the beast froze.

It had noticed him. He wasn't sure how he knew, but he was sure of it. His veins began glowing purple, the glow not coming at his request nor from his chakra.

It would appear the beast wasn't the only thing to notice an equal.

And then all he, it, and the 'god', knew was purple as the colour overtook everything.

Infinity met apocalypse.

What would have been a battle to tie for ages was quickened by one simple fact; Infinity was controlled by one who knew the importance of conservation, and perhaps more importantly, finesse and unpredictability.

Feeling his hold on humanity slipping for the first time since he made his deal with his "power benefactor", he knew he would have to make this quick.

A sudden, very bright, white light suddenly trying to contest with the both of them suddenly surprised him.

"Oh. I forgot about him," he said with a grin.

Well, if a lil' 'god' wanted to help, then who was Naruto to refuse?


Author Notes: So as with everything I write, I wrote 99% of this a month or two back, then I forgot about it—in this case, I wanted to write a "Talk no Jutsu" scene with Dohnaseek that seemed natural instead of forcing it, which I eventually did—and then I lost internet or whatever, which made me focus on my doc files and I found this and a whole bunch of other half-written or completed chapters.

I couldn't remember why I didn't post this one. I was sure there was a reason, but this was my chance; this was a way for me to quickly finish it and post it before my mind held me back because of very good reasons like "You didn't write down the plot and you don't remember it. What are you going to do for a chapter 2?"

Of course, now I am regretting writing that because now my mind is telling me that. Also reasons like "Naruto X DxD has a lot of viewers and toxicity. You can't take toxicity to save your life, you prick of a snowflake on the internet, destructo08. What are you going to do then?"

Well… uh… hopefully I won't have internet to view all that?

Now… what to do with the 2k word fight scene I have in another doc file…

Uh, and because of reasons I can't remember but I know I told myself I would do this, here; to my Discord place that basically has almost zero people and near-zero setup: https : / / discord . gg / xYQfCjMh4B