Watson, Northern Industrial District.
Maelstrom, gig, Johnny, package of many things.
And of course, V.


The thing is, today started off as a normal day for Night City and for V.

Or well as "normal" as things could be.

At least seven mass shootings, twenty counts of indiscriminate arson (two with a handheld chainsaw-blow torch combination) and that annoying guy - Piggy something got punched in the face by some dude wielding unstable heavy mining equipment.

So a normal day, at least where V is.

Specifically a pair of derelict buildings previously part of a now collapsed apartment complex that fed workers and new immigrants to industrial factories, located just a bit outside of the former All Food Plants, now part of the Maelstorm gangs chokehold on this part of Watson. A safe place for recruitment and supply lines away from the constantly shifting frontline of battle with the Tyger Claws.

The gig is simple, retrieve a package of something and get out. The job's description was labeled as easy and a way to space out V's time while she waits for Regina to spam her inbox with cyberpsycho sightings or Dakato's errantly odd timing of synchronizing random car images complete with price tags whenever V was busy with something, anything.

That also includes the one time when V's professional reputation as a badass high end mercenary was somewhat diluted after her phone rang and unexpectedly answered for fucks sake during a rather loud session with Judy, apparently the entire club of Afterlife now knows how to pronounce "fuck my mouth hurts more than my thighs do and can you pass the salt please?" in fluent Spanish.

Having to explain to Rogue that she's a switch and not a subby bottom with a penchant for food flavoring and double ended vibrators with a fake British accent was….embarrassing to say the least.

So V travels light to the gig,carrying a assault rifle with a shortened length and stock into a pseudo carbine format and a few clips of ammunition,a black crop top and blue jeans with haphazardly worn light armor pieces stuck to the body parts and organs that she actually needed to live with that somehow finishes the complete package of driving into town in a worn down shitwagon that constitutes as being "covert" in this area.

"Covert" meaning "local" and local translating into "broke as fuck".

On the exterior V fits in her, her worn down shitwagon passing naturally by with the other worn down shitwagons and her rough appearance of a stereotypical lesbian allows her to pass by the occasional checkpoint pretty well,

Unfortunately for V, while her Kiroshi optics and RAM Deck prevent her from getting ID'd by security cameras, snipers, surveillance drones, ID triggered minefields, other Kiroshi optics and even face recognition software (either bought,stolen or given as christmas gifts).

A Maelstrom ganger equipped with a pair of functioning organic eyeballs and a telescope that was looted from the deck of a 18th century era warship in a museum spotted her and upon recognising the pink and purple highlights that accented her copper hair, screamed the alarm in via an extremely and suspiciously complicated series of speaking tubes that snaked around half a block and prompted a roided up "reaction force" comprising of a single squeaky Toyota with three functioning tyres and a collapsed flatbed occupied by a single squad of Maelstromers.

Four of whom are dearly hanging on for sheer life.

Trigger happy gunshots alert V to the oncoming threat - stray bullets ricocheting off her cars hood, thinking quickly she turns the wheel over and hand breaks the worn down shitwagon into a squeaky bootleggers turn by the near conveniently placed chest high wall, unfortunately while the timing was excellent - there's no nearby presenters to compliment her on the well done job that every teenage boy should mastered (or fail at horribly, usually by driving into a farmer's ditch).

V then attempts to get out of her worn down shitwagon but finds to her minorly aggravating inconvenience that both doors are jammed in place - the locking mechanisms having probably finally worn out and the realization dawns that she should have just bought a Subaru like any decent lesbian (Rita owns like three which kind of makes V jealous to be honest).

Exiting the worn down shitwagon by bashing open the windows with her terrifyingly strong forehead, she executes a roll in mid air and lands perfectly on her ass - on hard pavement.

Regardless, thanks to both Judy's arsenal of strapons and her past life of mountain biking, V quickly recovers and moves to cover as the Maelstromer's "reaction" force thunder closer at a little above the speed limit.

Holding her assault rifle's barrel close to the chest high wall in front of her, V engages the gang. Professional rapid short squeezes of the trigger nets her a kill or two before the gangers disembark by throwing themselves onto the ground and she grinned in satisfaction.

Holding up a middle finger and pointing it at the biggest ganger. "Fuck you!" She shouts and ducks as the return fire lights up where her prized finger had previously occupied.

"Fuck you too!" One of the gangers reply and aims his weapon at her, a single loud boom erupts and in slow motion capture courtesy of Kiroshi :™:, V's surprised to see not a bullet but a musket ball tumble out of the gangers rifle, completely miss her by the margin of a postcode and lumber through the air at pedestrian speed into a nearby signpost and changing the name of the street into "O something".

"Are you fucking serious? Museum pieces?" Laughing in utter bewilderment, V throws an empty magazine at the offending ganger's head and knocks him out with perfect aim and a comically sound "clonk".

"Cheater!" One of the remaining enemies calls out incredulously.

"No you!" V fires back, slotting a fresh magazine in her rifle and using a quick hack on a nearby vending machine, overloading it and causing its entire inventory of cheap burritos to fly out and attack flanking gang members.

Another one shoots at her, this time a woman with a large mechanical hairstyle reminiscent of those ridiculous 1950's nuclear hairstyle forward rolls into view - keeping her hairstyle perfect she slings an old grenade launcher out of her fanny pack and launches a forty millimeter right at V.

Fortunately ,V's time as a professional university football player and her time in the navy prepared her for this very eventuality.

"Dont fuck!'
She jumps in the air to meet the grenade as it slowly exits it's sub orbital trajectory and headbutt's the grenade,it bounces off her skull - which redirects the now armed payload right back at the offending Maelstromer.
"With this mercenary!"

In the background, Johnny is playing the sound of a crowd cheering in the distance.

Unfortunately, the fun stops quite quickly.

Movement comes on the rooftops, a single huffin' n puffin' Maelstrom gang member carrying a terrifyingly large black case decorated in latin and curses (according to her zoomed in vision), V swears and prepares herself for what looks to be a heavy weapon that would doubtlessly blow her cover apart. Perhaps even a high tech missile launcher designed to fly into the air and come down with an explosive payload.

V reloads her weapon, praying that her video caller/phone software is destroyed too - with Judy's nudes on it, she'll be haunted in the afterlife if her trusty phone doesn't follow her there.

Turns out it's, neither?

The chromed maelstrom ganger, lined with military tech implants and sixteen cybernetic eyeballs decorating his face pulls out a gigantic golden French Horn ;the man steadies himself on the rooftop for stability and blow into the horn,bellowing a great tune of which the composition was sadly lost on V, being about three hundred years younger than whoever created it.

"What the fuck?"

"You know that's not even bad, my boy over there is hitting that shit juuust right," Johnny's grinning form appears perched on the conveniently located chest high wall and he saluates the Maelstrom band player?

"Nice of you to drop in!" V groans, emptying another magazine onto the floor and slightly panics when she realizes that she only has two left.

Johnny shrugs as he squats perfectly on the two deep brick wall. "Appreciate the classics sometime, that guy has clearly taken his band lessons to heart, give him some credit at the least."

Are you serious?

Yes I can hear your thoughts wooooooo - hurry up you gonk.

"Fine" Rolling her eyes, V briefly exposes her head above the wall and shouts at the top of the voice.

"Hey nice tune!"

"Thanks! My music teacher told me I'd never make it!" The ganger waves back.

"Happy now?" V sighs as she turns to Johnny who'd disappeared and then reappeared on the opposite side of where V's head was facing.

"Yes."

"I hate you."

Out of it's own free will) V's video caller rings and then automatically answers, she'd disposed of a phone a month ago and has been deeply regretting it, now having to operate the user-unfriendly interface and she hasn't figured out how to reject calls yet.

The girls at Lizzies have teased her about being a tech boomer and then laughed when V shook her fist at them.

"God fucking dammit what is it now I swear to god?" V smacks the back of her head against the wall, the band member-turned ganger still bellowing his tune as a part of V's hud turns from a "you are being called" to "you have answered" then slowly morphs into "receiving video".

"I fucking swear if this is the motherfucking car advertising service then I'll fucking tell these shit eating cocksuckers to get off my tits or I'll piss on them with a artifical cunt."

Johnny snorts "You know the therapy services are still open at this time of day?"

"Fuck you Johnny."

V's day that had slowly turned from "okay" into "help" suddenly brightens up as the caller ID shows up as one Judy.A , her output and someone that should definitely be working but right now V doesn't mind.

"Hey Judes." V couldn't help herself but smile, even during a strange gunfight her heart always lifts whenever its counterpart appeared.

And so does her ass, dont ask.

"Heyyyy V," Judy's voice, sultry and laced with a tinge of suggestion crackles into V's ears, her call ID turning into an image and then a video feed of what is presumably coming from Judy's side head implant.

"Hey?" V blinks as she slowly realizes that the video feed is one of Judy in the shower, and that it's slowly pointing from a view of the showerhead and now trickling down, Judy's fingers appear first and the camera follows those slim, lovely and tasty digits as they make their way south, cupping Judy's tattooed breasts and then giving a leisurely squeeze.

"Uh Judy, I'm uh kinda busy here," Flushing and now distracted by a sudden heat pooling in her stomach, V stammers and tries to speak her objection.

"Hey baby, is your microphone not working?"

"Judy I!"

"This is fucking gold" Johnny's voice pierces through V's two fronted concentration battle and she swears a nameless curse of "shut the fuck up".

V frantically tries to find the virtual button in her mind's interface that would allow her to actually speak back to Judy, to try to tell her that she's in the middle of a life and death situation and that while it's greatly appreciated, uh - maybe later?

"Doesn't matter, I finished work early and figured you'd enjoy the snow~" A series of images, screenshots filter through over the next few seconds and turn into a heated minute, a first person perspective from Judy leaning backwards into her shower wall, one hand groping a breast with a tweaking thumb on her nipple, V's output making sure to get plenty of action shots down there.

Distracted with a dry mouth and crimson ear tips, V watches helplessly as Judy screen'capps her masturbation session.

Despite everything she know's about firefights 101 V is honestly extremely, extremely tempted to crank one out right there and then.

Heaven knows, V's probably done far worse in a life or death situation.

But alas, she's interrupted.

The horn from above booms, this time a single long note that the remaining Maelstorm members join in with ominous chanting, clutching their weapons as they raise them to the sky.

"Dave! Dave! Dave! Dave!"

The errant symphony reaches its crescendo as a nearby portable lavatory "dings" and the door slams open, the electronic sign above changing from "throned" to "dethroned" as the bulk of a rather larger ganger steps out with a short but massive caliber firearm ,its barrel the size of a small tree trunk as he brandishes it into the air to the war call of "Dave".

The ganger steps into the middle of the pack, reinvigorating their will to fight as they take up positions around him and start blasting rifle, musket and even smallbore cannon fire around V's position, pinning her down.

V gestures over to Johnny whose busy lounging on the pavement nearby,utterly oblivious to the imminent doom of his host. "Could you do something?"

Preferably now and this time, unmusically.

"Oh right" Johnny lazily pulls himself up and brandishes a flamethrower out of his jean's pocket, the rockerboy making "whoosh" and "fwoosh" noises as he mimics the act of using one.

Unfortunately, the visual and physical realm fails to match the acoustic o and Johnny's impressive flamethrower act fails to barbecue the incoming gangers. "Sorry kid, but it looks like the power of imagination isn't enough" He shrugs and casually goes back to sunbathing.

The gangers advance, Dave's massive cannon primed and ready as he slowly marches into position, V's unable to return fire as the warleaders' cohorts suppress her position. She swears and curses Johnny, the pool between her legs ruining a good pair of underwear, Rogue for sending her on this stupid gig to begin with and then thanked Judy for sending her off to hell with a good set of nudes to jerk off to in the afterlife.

Gripping her rifle between her legs and preparing for the end, V thinks about Judy's nudes and the events of the past five minutes, her brain fast forwarding and rewinding any useful piece of information she could possibly use to get out of this situation before she was killed by the Napoleonic era.

Wait a fucking second.

What did Johnny say again?

A light bulb manifestes in her head at the exact wording from Johnny.

"The power of imagination fuckers!" V shouts as she processed time in slow motion and locks on to the warleader briefly - exposing herself and almost getting her head shot clean off, but it's more than enough time to quickly crack the combat-ICE that Maelstrom has and V's hit Dave with a the deadliest hack she has in her extensive arsenal - a pair of cybernetic malfunction quick hacks slams into Dave at the speed of thought and a few seconds later, the ganger writhes and screaming as both of his arms flies out of their with impression speed, sparks flying out of the connected sockets as Dave's limbs take flight and search for the stars.

Where will they go?
What will they find?
Will it be a new alien species? The cure to world peace?
The means to end furniture sales for good?
Alas, they'll never know.

The large bore weapon drops to the ground and so does he, Dave screams as he falls back into a mailbox and with a comical clang, lands on his face.

"I cant feel my fucking legs" He groans.

"That's because your arms have been blown off dude" One of the other gangers quietly comments and they all surround their leader, quietly and in a circle.

Taking the opportunity to escape, V locates the item she had been sent for , discovering that it was actually right next to her this entire time and that she could have probably avoided the firefight to begin with. Johnny called her a gonk and she fired back with a "gilf eater".

Turning around in her car and speeding off, V watches in the mirror as one of the gangers stumble into the weapon and gawks at it before picking it up and screaming "Blunderbuss!".

The other gangers take note and soon they're all jumping up and down in ecstasy as one of Dave's arms inconveniently lands on top of a forgotten fast food delivery.

Still, could be worse. The NCPD would soon be landed with noise complaints as the ganger with the horn starts blurting out again while his fellows below wouldn't stop their chanting until well into the night, the Blunderbuss eventually claiming a victim as a unfortunate Maelstrom member eventually became the first of his kind to enter the exosphere at the result of a misfire.


Having uninstalled the troublesome phone related software in her head and leaving it with a ⅕ stars review on the net - could be better but needs a off function.

V travels slowly through the winding streets of Watson and past Kabuki, ignoring the ruined seat that forces her to constantly shift her thighs so she wouldn't hit another vehicle.

She'd managed to find a basic flip phone that after some persuasion had accepted all of her contacts with V vowing to never again rely on anything other than handheld devices for accepting calls.

Before she can lay it to rest on the passenger seat, the flip phone rings to the tune of UsCracks at full volume and she answers it to Judy.

"Hey babe," Came the voice through the speakers.

"Hey you, sorry about earlier. Was in the middle of a firefight and couldn't find the microphone,"

"That's alright, are you okay? And uh, enjoy the show?" Judy chuckles, sending a warm tingle down V's spine at the combined knowledge that somebody worries about her and also sent nudes, not at the best times granted but still, nudes are nudes.

"Yeah yeah, and yeah, uh yeah," V stammers at the memory of watching Judy tease and then the picture roll of well, "that".

"Heh, good to know mi calabacita , you free?"

"Uh, need to drop off a package for Rogue first."

"Go faster then!" Judy pleads, her voice taking on a more..urgent tone. One that pricks at V's ears and gives them a cute but noticeable red tinge.

"I am! I ain't gonna crash into people and Rogue will be pissed if something happens to whatever is inside that box," V cries back., tightening her grip on the steering wheel and cursing the traffic lights for being so alive.

"Commeee ooonnn, hurrrrry upp, if you get here sooon I'll uh," Judy stops for a second, V can physically hear the ticking sound of whatever her output was planning and it's simultaneously terrifying and arousing.

"Will you give me a kiss?" V teases back, if Judy wants to play this game then so would she.

"I'll give you more than a kiss."

"We can do anal, just showered remember?"

Fuck.

Uh.

Suddenly Rogue or the traffic laws don't seem to matter much ,the moment the lights go on green V puts her foot down and shifts into a higher gear.

"I'll be right there."