A/N ok let's try this one last time…. Rest in peace stan Lee the characters you came up with brought joy to the world and inspired many including myself, I wish I could have met you. "" is spoken dialogue, '' is internal monologue.

Disclaimer I am nether sober nor do I own spiderman

Web head volume 1

"Hey there let's get you up to speed. My name is Peter Parker, it's October during my senior year of high school and for 11 months I've been the astonishing friendly neighborhood spiderman, it all started at the annual stark enterprises Expo where brilliant scientist Bruce banner presented his gamma enhanced super soldier spiders but A.I.M. being A.I.M. trashed the party, banners story changed that day too but as for me one of the spiders bit me and you all know what it did, my uncle Ben had done probably every job you can think of before he became an engineer, he always lectured about the importance of hard work and responsibility I never really listened and uncle Ben paid the price so now everyone is my responsibility. You all caught up? Good let's get to the good stuff"

At a warehouse by the docks in the middle of the night something is happening… a group of three thugs: one with two old west pistols and dressed like a cowboy, another a Hispanic gentlemen in a fancy expensive suit and carrying a bo staff and the last a large bald black man with face tattoos are being ordered to fight a red and navy blue clad pest swinging around the place by what is clearly an elderly Italian mobster.

"stop him you fighi's!" The mobster known as Silvermaine yelled to his inept henchmen the enforcers.

'So it's a Thursday night, I have a major test tomorrow in my history class and all my friends are out at the movies together but am I with them…? Nope. I'm fighting a mob boss and his Merry band of dick heads.' the web head thinks to himself as he dodges the gunfire from everyone's favorite southern cowboy Montana simultaneously webbing him to the fancy dressed fancy dan. Ox can't be taken down with webbing though, he requires very close combat. Once the enforcers are dealt with our hero approaches Silvermaine backing him into a corner

"Ok gramps games over and guess who has a bingo" BANG! suddenly silvermaine is falling to the ground dead in a pool of his blood with a bullet in his head. "Nnnnoooo!" The web head shrieked in horror, he just wanted silvermaine behind bars not…. This but as he turns around stare and behold the shooter: a man in black with a bullet proof vest skull painted on it's front and he's holding the still smoking shotgun. "Scum like this needs to be put down bug, stay out of my way or you'll be next"

The gunshot and all the other comotion has brought the police and the punisher escaped in the distraction. The cop car pulls up revealing a middle-aged Asian women drawing her gun immediately at the situation, this is police chief yuri watanabe sworn to bring spiderman down. "Freeze spiderman you are under arrest for the murder of silvio manfredi!" A panicked and stuttering spider still desperately tries to state his innocence. Spiderman very much wants to be able to work with the police but so far he hasn't had much luck. "wha… whoa wait..t wait a minute i.. I didn't do this! Some nut job with a shotgun and a skull shirt did!" Yuri wasn't letting up but a man with dark dirty blonde hair, a serious 5 o'clock shadow, blue eyes and a tan overcoat spoke up "the punisher… this definitely fits castles profile and silvermaine WAS the one that put the hit out on his family…." This is Captain George Stacy, one of the only supporters of the web slinger within the police and the father of his kinda girlfriend Gwen.

While yuri and the other cops were distracted everyone's favorite wall crawler made a very heroic escape, even going to the extent to bash his knee on the way out. "Damit!" Screamed the chief in frustration. Not long later at the murder scene the chief approached the Captain with uncertainty "Captain you really think spiderman didn't do this….?" "Look at the evidence chief. Spiderman fights crime yes but has never shown any sign of being homicidal, spiderman was found clutching the body with a single 19 millimeter round in the head, the punishers trademark, it looks like it was fired from approximately 25 meters away so he was likely standing right over that ledge judging by the angle of impact. There's no way spiderman did this." Informed the captain

"Still spiderman is a reckless vigilante, who will be collateral damage next in his fight…? You? Me? Your daughter?" The chief bitterly replied. "I know you hate the web head chief but how about we leave Gwen out of it. Spiderman is an amateur but the kid means well."

The next morning in a rented townhouse in queens a skinny dark haired 17 year old boy painfully gets out of bed and ready for school, throwing a shirt over his bruised body. This is Peter Parker the astonishing spiderman but as far as his aunt downstairs knows he's just her genius nephew, to most of his classmates he is midtown highs most awkward nerd, to his friends: Harry Osborn the rich but clueless son of oscorp founder Norman Osborn, miles morales the artistic son of a beat cop that spidey has saved a few times, ganke lee the talkative son of Martian lee head of a local soup kitchen,and Jessica drew the know it all daughter of a famous know it scientist at oscorp, he is their science obsessed, low self esteem friend, to Gwen Stacy he's her not exactly but close enough boyfriend:Peter and gwen met when they were 10 after Gwen's dad got transformed as the new police captain, she came to Peters aid when being bullied by flash Thompson, being the daughter of a cop and all she could definitely handle herself. They haven't actually made what they are official or anything but they do a lot of couple things with each other so let's say they are…. Neither really knows for sure.

As Peter heads downstairs to eat breakfast his aunt may, a middle-aged woman with dark brown hair and green eyes not even related by blood but still busts her ass working as a photographer at Coney Island and a waitress to support him "oh good it's about time you're going to be late, there's wheatcakes on the counter for you, I'm gonna be home late tonight oh and before I forget you must meat Anna's niece she moving in next week, she's your age and will be going to your school in a few weeks" Absentally nodding Peter responds in order "morning aunt may, I have plenty of time until class, thanks, ok no problem me and Gwen will just get pizza or something, sure ok I'll meet her but don't get any ideas." As he walked out the door towards school but on his way he saw himself or rather spiderman running out a bank with a sack of stolen cash.

'Ok I know that's not me cause i'm right here so who's that and what's he doing to my friendly neighborhood name!' Chief watanabe arrives on the scene just as Pete's running off to suit up. "Hold it right there spiderman! Robbing a bank? I knew you weren't a hero, you're what I always said you are you're a criminal!" Exclaimed the chief until a vaguely irritating voice was heard "whoa whoa whoa I'm not a criminal and this guy clearly isn't me, only the genuine article could look this good in spandex" spider joked while jestering to himself. "So you've formed your own gang now spiderman… well it's not going to do you any good. You and your partner are both going to prison." An unbelievably frustrated spiderman can't help but yell at the chief "what?! Aren't you listening at all!? I don't know this guy! I'm not a criminal! I'd never Rob a bank an-..." But he's cut off when the imposter starts running off only to be webbed to the ground, disregarding the cops spidey walks up to the crook and pulls his mask off only to shriek back in surprise at the guys white metallic helmet covering his entire face. "Ok I want answers! Who are you! Why are you framing me! Why are you wearing such an uncomfortable looking helmet!" He asks the chameleon in an overdramatic deep yelling voice. "Heh like I'm afraid of you…. If you knew who gave the order you wouldn't be so gung ho about being a hero boy." He laughed out in a very thick Russian accent, this information eye widening to the old web head "wait someone hired you to frame me!? Who…? Why?" Yuri approaches them by now "ha no it's not that easy hero… you'll meet him soon enough though…" the crook let out but before the chief once again demanded spiderman comply with her attempts at arresting him "sorry no thanks I'm late for a meeting chief but you can keep this chameleon and let's really do this again sometime" spiderman quipped as he swung away in the air towards his school of bullies,his friends, Gwen and a not so good history grade.

In a large poorly lit room with several computer monitors around a large and clearly dangerous man whispered with glee "the seeds are planted, the stage is set, the message is sent and now it's time for the kingpin to strike."

A/N Hopefully I can do this right this time but I write when trashed and I'm not like a vending machine that can get drunk and just order a spiderman story I don't have control over what my drunken self decides to write but let's hope this works. What do you think…? Oh shit I'm about to pass out.