CHAPTER 1 A FAMILY AFFAIR- NATHAN'POV
A/N This fanfic is a joint effort between myself and K8eSunbug. We have to give a special shout out to founders and members of the Support the Serge book club as the catalyst for starting us on this journey. Please be sure to leave constructive feedback.
It was a chilly evening in Hope Valley even though spring had already begun. Nathan had just completed his rounds and was bedding down his faithful partner Newton for the night. He was glad to be able to put this particular workday behind him, because it seemed that he had run into Elizabeth and Lucas even more than usual. He couldn't help noticing that once again Jack was not with them, and he just couldn't understand what had gotten into Elizabeth lately. It used to be rare that you would see her without her son, so Nathan knew who was behind it, but it was still Elizabeth's decision to go along with it. Seeing them together was always difficult but today it had left him drained and he just wanted to go home and be with Allie. The Christmas holiday had been extremely hard on both of them, as they had anticipated including the Thornton's in their traditions. Instead, it wasn't meant to be and their dreams of a family of four had been crushed. It seemed like the town hadn't been in the Christmas spirit this year either, and their activities weren't as lively. But it appeared as though others in town were continuing to struggle. Granted, Bill was never completely happy unless he was holding Jack, but he was even sadder than usual, and Nathan knew his heart was grieving for what should have been. His dream of the four becoming a family had been crushed as well.
Nathan had made a resolution on New Years that he would move on and focus on Allie and keeping the town safe, but it galled him every time he caught that smug triumphant smirk Lucas shot him when Elizabeth wasn't paying attention. It was like a hot poker through his heart every time, sending fresh pain coursing through him. There really was nothing Nathan could do or say to Elizabeth in regards to Lucas, as she would just think he was jealous. He had even started finding reasons not to stay in his office, because it was a painful reminder of the most excruciating experience since losing his sister. His heart had been shattered that day and he was still trying to pick up the pieces. He was determined to move forward this year, regardless of what the woman he loved with all his heart had decided. He didn't want to believe she was intentionally trying to flaunt her happiness in front of him, instead hoping she was just following her usual routes out of habit. Something inside him, that little bit of hope that refused to be extinguished, made him believe it was the latter because Elizabeth wasn't a vindictive person.
He would not allow her steal any more of his focus and time. There was one very special lady in his life who deserved the best of him and in fact had lived in his heart from the very day she was born. He was determined to put Elizabeth from his mind and focus solely on Allie, especially after this past Christmas. It had been their first since officially becoming father and daughter. Nathan smiled as he thought back to that day in the café when Allie asked if he could just promise to never leave her. He never would, at least not voluntarily, and couldn't even if he had wanted to. She knew that as a Mountie he couldn't guarantee he wouldn't have to go away at time, but she also knew he took extra precautions and didn't take unnecessary risks to his safety. He would never take assignments or postings that were knowingly dangerous, such as the northern territories, or long term. He had made it abundantly clear to his superiors that if they tried, he would resign without delay. But any assignment, no matter how seemingly safe, had the potential to become dangerous—like taking recruits out on a training mission and being caught in a landslide like Jack Thornton. As far as Nathan was concerned, Allie's adoption was just a piece of paper; in his heart she had long been his daughter, the best gift he had ever received besides hearing her call him Dad instead of Uncle Nathan. Even months later, he felt the tugs on his heart and couldn't help the smile it brought to his face. He saved every note and letter she left that addressed him as Dad in his bible. His serge threatened to burst with pride whenever he spoke to other Mounties about his Allie.
Nathan had no intention of ever opening himself up to romantic love again. He simply knew that he would never love another woman as he did Elizabeth. Unlike her, he would not risk hurting another woman by not being able to give all of his heart. Not to mention, he wouldn't take the risk that another woman would reject his love because of his job. No. He would stay in Hope Valley until Allie finished school and then would look for another posting, one that might allow him to move up the Mountie promotion ladder to Inspector and possibly even beyond. He quite willingly put his career advancement on hold until Allie was grown and attending College and felt no regrets about it. It was another reason that he was not looking to get involved with another woman. He was like Jack Thornton in that respect—he never intended to marry but ironically an encounter with the true Elizabeth Thatcher Thornton quickly changed his mind.
Deep down, he understood why she was afraid to take a risk with another Mountie, but he would never understand why she allowed that fear to keep her from a true selfless love. He had offered to quit the Mounties and would have without hesitation. After he'd thought about it, he realized even then that she was showing her care that he would come to regret giving it up for her. What hurt just as badly was that in losing her, he lost little Jack, a boy he loved as his own son. Lee, Rosemary, Bill, Laura, and Robert would stop by the jail every time they had him and were in town for a visit. Most of Hope Valley knew that young Jack adored Nathan and Allie as much as they loved him. Nathan would always keep tabs on little Jack for himself and his fallen Mountie brother. Instead of out of guilt and regret, it was now an act of love and for his own sake. He would also keep quiet tabs on Elizabeth, even when she ultimately married Lucas, because of his fallen brother, but strictly through intermediaries. He had to protect his heart, for she would always own a piece of it. Nathan would see to it that he was only notified if there was trouble, and he would pray someday to publicly be part of Jack's life in adulthood.
He had no doubt that despite the hurtful words Elizabeth spoke to him in the Jail, she didn't mean them and had instead chosen the 'safe' option. He still wasn't sure why she had deliberately lied. Everyone but her knew that her heart was his, but he did love her and want her happiness. Truthfully, it had been a lack of communication between them, strong paralyzing fear, and the interference from another that really hindered their relationship. He would like to at least return to the easy friendship they'd once had, back to the days where they could easily tease each other or just have long deep discussions. He would always be grateful for the help she gave Allie and her words of comfort that what happened to Jack wasn't his fault. He just prayed that she would recognize the truth of who Lucas was and how he viewed her before it was too late. He hated having a front row seat to the disaster, but Elizabeth had to find out for herself. She had to come to the realization that Lucas saw her merely as the trophy he won in the competition for her heart, that his smiles at her and smug looks at Nathan were about his victory. He worried that there were more underlying and devious reasons for Lucas's pursuit of her. Unlike Nathan, who saw Elizabeth's heart and love as a treasure worth having even if she were penniless, what Lucas wanted from her had nothing to do with love.
It was hard to stand by and watch, but even in this he was fighting for Elizabeth's love and happiness. He felt like it was the fight of his life, but true love was always worth fighting for and defending when necessary, even at great cost to himself. "Please Lord, help Lizbeth see the truth before it is too late. Watch over her and Jack and let no harm come to them." With that prayer, he headed into his row house where Allie waited with a hug and was preparing dinner. It was time for him to move on and enjoy the love of one female who chose to love him despite the fears that came with his job as a Mountie.
